23 posts shown.
silentraven6 said:I used to be such a bookworm; I’d juggle two fantasy novels at once while keeping up with technical reading. My average was easily ten books a month. Now? I’ve been stuck on this 200-page Pavlic crime thriller for two months straight... and I’m seriously behind on my library returns!
Joshua James40 said:Honestly, it really gets under my skin when my partner insists that hormones and all the mood swings that come with them are just some kind of feminine nonsense—as if I’m just making things up or should somehow just act like everything is normal.
It bugs me how some guys—not all of them, obviously, but plenty—just carry on with their lives as if their wives aren't even pregnant... meanwhile, women actually need a bit more support and attention during this phase.
And don't even get me started on that classic, patronizing "just enjoy being pregnant and focus on yourself" cliché... how exactly am I supposed to "enjoy" this? I’ve gained 20 pounds, I can’t go in the pool, nothing fits me anymore, and I can barely walk twenty feet without feeling like my spleen is trying to exit my body. I can't even grab coffee with my friends—I guess nobody invites me out anymore because they're terrified I'll go into labor right there in the middle of the cafe. So yeah, my big plans involve reading a book and eating about 500 pastries in a row.
gentlesailor2 said:How much weight did you gain? 🙂 ENOUGH!
Gary James17 said:...it drives me insane when people act like my entire existence has shrunk down to nothing more than their own unsolicited opinions on pregnancy, labor, and kids, especially when they aren't just offering advice, but are basically weaponizing these patronizing warnings like:
"Oh, just wait until you see how it is, you won't want to go anywhere anymore" (as if I have a social life to begin with), "you won't be able to sleep in until 9" (as if I’m currently sleeping in), "you'll never be alone again," hahaha, "enjoy your solitude while it lasts," or even things like, "better swap out that carpet because once the baby arrives..." or "buy a dishwasher because you won't have time for dishes" (like that's the crisis here), or "you'll be too busy gardening and baking cookies to deal with a baby" (as if dreaming of a garden or having a little organic vegetable patch is some kind of sin, or like feeding a child from your own garden is some impossible Herculean task), "don't bother with cloth diapers because you won't have time to wash them every three days" (implying anyone who does is clearly incompetent), "cut your hair short because you won't be able to manage long hair during labor," and then all the horror stories about birth and breastfeeding... blablablabla....
The reality is I’m practically living in hospitals; I’ve been on bed rest since week 7 (and it’s already been four full months!) and it’s going to stay this way—bleeding, contractions, cervical issues, the whole bit. Most days I am completely alone, constantly in pain and gripped by anxiety, feeling so stiff that my only exercise is rolling from my right side to my left, and honestly, I don't know how life could possibly get any worse than this, yet people still feel the need to explain to me how much more miserable things will be once I actually go into labor. I just don't get it!
And it particularly irritates me how some people think it’s great that I can spend my days reading or watching TV, or how everyone treats me like some pampered guest being served. Please, don't lecture me on how easy I have it unless you've actually lived it!
And yeah, I become the black sheep every time I snap at someone or push back, and nobody seems to grasp why I’m actually so irritable and moody most of the time! Helloooo, even the most perfectly healthy pregnant woman finds things difficult sometimes! Right?
And why on earth do people feel the need to drag up stories about the neighbor, a relative, or an acquaintance who had various miscarriages, lost a baby during delivery, or lost one in the second trimester... and they choose to tell these stories to a pregnant woman who has been explicitly diagnosed with a threatened miscarriage...
Don't even get me started on the doctors! One tells me to take certain pills, another looks at me like I'm crazy and says don't take them. Then there's the bureaucracy—faulty referrals, or "No ma'am, we don't run blood tests for that specific diagnosis, go get a new referral first..." And then there's that condescending attitude where they say, "Don't worry about your cervix, that's our job" (when I was simply asking if it was still dilated like last time—my cervix is part of my body, of course I want to know what's happening with it!)
...I don't trust anyone anymore and, frankly, I'd almost rather just give birth at home!
Sometimes I genuinely wish I had been born five hundred years ago, when nobody knew anything about modern pregnancy complications, when doctors didn't exist, so I could just give birth in the middle of tilling a field, wrap the baby up, and get right back to digging!
It also really gets to me that I am craving sweets so badly... I'm dreaming of cheesecake... but I can't have any because of gestational diabetes. It's infuriating how everyone keeps pushing sweets and treats on me that I shouldn't touch, acting as if a tiny indulgence won't hurt. Well, sure, maybe one bite won't kill me, but doing it every day leads to new complications, and I really don't need those! It's hard enough for me to control myself and stick to this stupid diet, and I'm being incredibly disciplined... but it certainly isn't helping that the people around me won't stop trying to tempt me.
And then there are the comments like—"Wait, you haven't gained any weight???" implying that's a bad thing, or "What about the baby?" The baby is exactly the size it needs to be, healthy and active, whereas I have no legs or glutes left from being immobile, just a stomach and constant nausea... so naturally, I haven't put on much weight yet... but I don't care, because the baby is fine.
But people just won't stop planting seeds of doubt in my head...
I could keep going, but I'm already exhausted! 🙂
p.s. Yep, I totally snapped. 🙂 You don't need to comment on any of this.
Brenda Sullivan59 said:Superstitions. I absolutely hate them... I lost my mind the other day... 🙂
So, my grandma—who I basically lived with for 24 years—passed away... 😢
And because of some stupid superstition, they wouldn't even let me see her...
First off, they waited five hours after everyone else to tell me. Naturally, I totally lost it. Like, you aren't allowed to cry or get worked up? Well, I did exactly that. Just a complete mess... 🙂 🙂 🙂
Then I hear someone whisper from the side: "Well, pregnant women shouldn't be attending funerals anyway." 🙂
Yeah, good luck trying to stop me from doing that... 🙂
Alex Roberts4 said:What happened to me today was honestly peak absurdity. I felt like I was being interrogated by the Inquisition or something. This lady from my neighborhood starts grilling me about where I’m planning to have my baby. I tell her I’m looking at the Peterson clinic, and she just loses it. I told her I actually gave birth at the Holy Spirit hospital and they were absolutely top-tier—not a single complaint. Then she has the nerve to ask if I’ve already "secured" a specific doctor over at Peterson, acting like he's the only one worth seeing. I just stared at her and said, "Actually, there are plenty of great doctors there, and you just show up on the day you want and see who's available." I wasn't looking for any special favors, and besides, I haven't even started my prenatal appointments yet.
But no, she keeps harping on about the Holy Spirit hospital, acting like there's some secret way to get in. Basically, she had a connection, bragged about how great it was, and now she thinks everyone else should have it easy too. As if! I countered by saying I hadn't decided yet and that her precious little hospital isn't perfect either. My experience at the Vineyard wasn't exactly stellar, and some of my friends had issues at either Holy Spirit or Peterson, so... what now? If I followed her logic, I wouldn't be able to pick a hospital at all.
But wait, it gets better. Am I going crazy? I mentioned I hoped things wouldn't end up being that complicated, and she goes, "Well, you can just arrange it..." Oh, for crying out loud! Go ahead, "arrange" for someone to cut you open, why don't you? And then—get this—she asks if my mom would be able to help out during delivery. I told her that if she could, she would, but she's getting older and her health isn't what it used to be. The look she gave me... it was classic. Like, "Oh, grandmas aren't allowed to be sick or weak; they have to sacrifice themselves no matter what." It was a total disaster. She made my mom sound like some kind of monster, when the poor woman raised four kids all by herself and now she's elderly and struggling with her health, so she obviously can't do everything all the time. That was the moment I drew the line. Truly insane.
Honestly, the worst ones are always the women who have already given birth. They’re the ones most likely to swoop in and try to "educate" me... they act so self-important and pushy. Like their choice is the only right choice. Seriously, it's unbelievable. So incredibly intrusive and exclusionary.
Alex Castillo said:@anpi, don't be mad at me, but honestly, your husband can probably handle the laundry himself. My guy didn't even know how to turn on the washing machine until I finally snapped and told him there was no way an engineer could be this clueless about basic appliances. This was back when I was early in my pregnancy; I was working quite far away, so I was staying with my dad since he lives right near my office. Once I walked him through the laundry process, he just looked at me and asked, "Is that it?" And yeah, that was it! He’s been ironing his own clothes ever since, even though his mom lives just two streets over. It shouldn't be such a huge ordeal to iron a work shirt, 🙄
. You're probably just used to a mother-in-law who won't lift a finger for her own kid and would rather leave you to fend for yourself. You've got to teach him to save both you and your mom the trouble—especially if his mom never taught him these things in the first place. ☕
Besides, I never had to do a ton of housework at my mom's house either. We started from the exact same place, so we can figure this out together.
casualsurfer8 said:cosmiccrane15, tell me about it. I’ve been stuck on bed rest for months now, and honestly, it’s driving me insane. My husband thinks cleaning the bathroom once a week and running the vacuum through the house is enough... But then I feel bad because he’s handling everything solo, so I just shut up and ignore the dust.
But you hit the nail on the head. I’m almost at the end of my bed rest too (35 weeks), and I feel like I’ve spent half my life Googling things. If it makes it any better, I’ll be able to scrub this entire house from top to bottom by myself in about two weeks. 😍
Other than that, this pregnancy hasn't really pushed my buttons much since I'm basically cooped up at home seeing next to nobody... 😉
gentlesailor2 said:I spent four weeks stuck on the couch myself. I spent the whole time nagging my husband with a rag, like, "Hey, wipe that down" or "Can you please get rid of that spider?" It’s wild how much you notice from that perspective. It wasn't even hard for me to jump back into the housework, but he swore those were the worst four weeks of his entire life... 😁
granitewolf20 said:cosmiccrane15... honestly, this is top-tier 😍
smin is just c/p 😬
if I were picking, maybe something more like this shape, hmm
