Posts by Kate James

Hey there.
I’m in the same boat—nobody ever offers me a seat on the bus, though I don't exactly go hunting for one myself, even when I've spent way too much time on my feet. But recently, after an exhausting shopping trip with a friend, I finally decided to sit down. Believe it or not, some guy lunged at me, grabbed my shoulder roughly, and barked, "What, are you disabled or something? Why do you have to sit right next to all these elderly people?!" Naturally, I snapped back at him with the same energy, telling him no, but that I am pregnant. He had the audacity to actually lean in to inspect my stomach to judge how far along I was. Disgusting. At least the other passengers on the bus looked horrified—that’s a small mercy.

It’s just constant. People seem to think they have a VIP pass to critique my body without being asked. One minute I’m too thin, the next I’ve gained too much weight, then my bump is too small, or today, someone decided it was too big. They'll tell me I'm going to have a hard labor, or ask if my feet have swollen yet... it never ends.

Fortunately, I’m actually enjoying this pregnancy and staying pretty zen about it, so their nonsense doesn't rattle me too deeply, but I still can't wrap my head around why people act like this.

I’m not easily rattled—I tend to maintain a certain level of optimism and try not to let things get under my skin—but I’m starting to see some striking parallels with how other mothers handle this. Our baby is due in August, yet I’ve already gone ahead and pre-ordered a mountain of gear from friends and acquaintances, and even scouted out the crib and dresser we’ll eventually pick up. It’s purely pragmatic; I need a ballpark figure for the budget and a sense of what kind of support we might receive from family. My mother thinks I'm being reckless, driven by some sort of superstition, insisting we should wait until the final days before delivery to settle everything. But I have no intention of dealing with a shopping frenzy in the middle of a sweltering American summer heatwave, nor do I want the unnecessary stress. I refuse to invite any negativity into the process.☕

It didn't exactly set me off, but I have to get this off my chest; a coworker made a comment about how she can't wait to see my "little and chubby" kid. I’m actually quite petite, and I usually shop in the toddler section, so I guess they assume I'll be spending all my time at Target instead.🙄

Every night, I’m over here scratching at my chest and stomach like some frantic little monkey. My breasts have definitely gone up a size, and I swear the skin feels thinner—maybe it's just my imagination, but now I find myself obsessively checking my circulation. Even the slightest scratch leaves these tiny bruises behind. My nipples are already a mess, and my stomach is just starting its upward climb. I slather on oil like a piglet, but five minutes later, it’s like I never even applied it. At this rate, I might as well just sleep in a bathtub full of oil. 😢

Honestly, I’m not even particularly thrilled by all this; I just find it hard to believe how people think they have a right to stick their noses into business that isn't theirs. From commenting on a pregnant woman's weight or the shape of her belly, to questioning her marital status or what she plans to name the baby... it's relentless. One woman actually had the audacity to try and feel my tiny bump. ☕

Yesterday, my husband ran into an old childhood friend of his, who happened to be there with her kid. During our chat, he casually mentioned we’re expecting, and she immediately started grilling us about when the wedding is and what kind of ceremony we're planning. 🙄
We’ve decided to just tell everyone to check back with us in the year 2050 at the local nursing home; they'll be officially invited then. 😁

Ever since we announced the pregnancy, it feels like everyone is suddenly an expert on our parenting choices—specifically regarding our dog. They keep offering to "take her off our hands," acting as if they’re doing us some huge favor. Honestly, it’s absurd. She isn’t just a pet; she’s the soul of our home, our little zen master. Sure, she’s high-maintenance and will probably get even more energetic once the baby arrives, but I couldn't bear the thought of treating a family member like a piece of unwanted furniture. She’s part of this family, period. But apparently, according to the peanut gallery, the newborn is going to suffocate under a layer of fur. 🙄 Do they think we don't own a Dyson? ☕

Then there’s the wedding situation. For years, nobody blinked an eye at our plans, but now that a baby is involved, suddenly everything is "inappropriate." It’s ridiculous. At this rate, I suppose we should just wear plastic rings and hand out printed certificates to ensure the child’s psycho-social development remains untainted by the reality of a marriage. 🤣

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised; I'm currently swimming in pregnancy hormones, so maybe I'm just seeing the comedy in all this madness. 😍

I went through a similar procedure myself (not tendons, though). They initially suggested local anesthesia combined with an axillary block... Fast forward twelve hours post-op, and my arm is completely numb while my fingers have turned swollen and blue—partly from blood pooling and partly due to those tight compression wraps they use to prevent hemorrhaging. Everything was fine until the sensation started returning; once they loosened the bandages even slightly, the agony began. It’s been about ten hours of pure misery. Honestly, the pain was so intense I felt like I couldn't take it anymore; you can practically feel your own bone. Thank God for the heavy-duty narcotics they provide in the hospital... I'm back on oral painkillers now and feeling a bit more human. And yes, I did pass out—and I'm not even someone prone to fainting—just from seeing what a massacre the dressing change looked like.🙄

I didn't mean to scare you; I just wanted to suggest that you should savor this current state of numbness while it lasts. Aren't you still at the hospital? You should ask the staff about it. When I had my surgery, they kept me under constant supervision because my fingers looked exactly like this...🤷