Posts by brightmaker29

10 posts shown.

Fear of commitment in Psychology · Sep 10, 2007

Paul Morales3 said:SENDING THIS TO YOU FOR COURAGE. 🙏 🙏 👍 👍 👍

I think my issue is that I loathe change. I've carved out this little routine within the chaos of my current life, and I'm terrified of anything disrupting my comfort zone, even if it's something good. It feels pathetic, but I'm scared of happiness too, because I have no idea who I'd become if things actually went well.😢

Other people have never been my benchmark; I don't care if they're in relationships while I'm flying solo.
Just like you, I have no desire for obligations or feeling like I owe someone an explanation for my actions. That kind of restriction would be suffocating. As for finding high-quality partners, I haven't met anyone worth giving a chance to—someone capable of accepting me exactly as I am.

It's like I wrote it myself. 😘

What scares me most is happiness and success in anything. 😠
I know it sounds miserable, but my life hasn't exactly been a string of happy moments up to this point, so I kind of got used to "suffering." Then suddenly everything changed... and I didn't know how to act when I wasn't unhappy. 😠 I'm still learning, and sometimes I overdo the drama myself.
But if you don't risk it, you don't profit.
Later on, I ended up regretting all the good opportunities I passed up in my life—and there were plenty.
Don't let that happen to you. Try to take a risk and just relax a little...
Of course, only if you truly want to and if the "right one" actually shows up. 😁

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Fear of commitment in Psychology · Sep 10, 2007

"Quincy"

Paul Morales3 said:Finding them is the easy part. 🙂The real headache is figuring out how to approach them without looking like a total creep.😬

Honestly, I really don't know.
Ask yourself: do you actually want a relationship? And if so, why? If not, what's the reason?
Maybe you just haven't come across the right kind of person yet—someone who actually fits what you're looking for.
Stop worrying about everyone else and quit comparing yourself to them. Like, everyone seems to have a boyfriend or something...
Everyone's happy.
I'm actually super friendly with all the guys I'm not interested in, but the second someone catches my eye? I immediately shut them down or just totally ignore them.😠
I've actually realized that I don't want a relationship right now. I still have so many life goals I haven't checked off yet, and I honestly feel like being with someone would just hold me back. I'm worried all my dreams would just end up falling through.
I’ve come to realize that I’m actually afraid of myself. Is it just that I don't know how to function properly in a relationship? Maybe I just don't want the commitment or the feeling that I have to answer to someone else.
Look, I’ll admit it—now you have to figure out for yourself what it is you're actually afraid of.🙂

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Fear of commitment in Psychology · Sep 8, 2007

Paul Morales3 said:My longest actual relationship—get this—was a grand total of three months, 🤣 and even that was long-distance. 😬
I have no clue how to break this cycle. I genuinely want a standard, functional relationship where you actually see your partner once or twice a week in person. 😢

So, what's the move? Does anyone have any real advice?

First off, find someone who lives in the same city as you.🙂
That would be a great start.🙂

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Fear of commitment in Psychology · Sep 7, 2007

Welcome to the club🙂😘

I honestly don't know either
I just can't seem to make relationships work without losing who I am in the process. I always end up regretting it, so now I just don't let anyone get close anymore...

Even my "friends" are getting on my nerves lately. I've realized I have nothing in common with most of them, and it’s just eating away at me...

Maybe some people are just born to be individuals and live life on their own terms...😠 😁

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Living with depression, anxiety, and an eating disorder in Psychology · Sep 6, 2007

George Garcia9 said:Yeah, I am. I finally started seeing a psychiatrist late last year once I realized I couldn't pull myself out of this hole on my own. (I dropped out of college right around then, too). But honestly? It’s not really helping. I show up every three or four weeks, vent about how I had two terrible weeks and maybe one or two decent ones since we last talked, blah blah blah, and then she just schedules the next appointment and bumps up my dosage a little bit. She tells me I should find some hobbies or get busy with responsibilities—which was easy enough to say back when I was actually attending classes. But here's the thing... when I'm in a deep depression, I don't give a damn about anything. I just want to crawl into a hole and die. Nothing feels worth the effort of "getting involved" in something. 😢

I probably should try group therapy, too. I went a couple of times, but what's the point of sitting there listening to everyone else whine about their problems? It just makes me feel even more miserable. :P

What I actually need is a psychologist to see once a week, but... that costs money. And I feel like a total loser asking my mom for $33 every single week just for that. Plus, I don't even feel like I deserve to have that kind of money spent on me... My self-esteem is non-existent and, honestly, I just hate myself. It's not fun. 😢

Look, stop thinking about everyone else. It’s not being selfish.
You and your health come first. Look at it this way—it's all about perspective. They owe it to you. Ask for it, and if they say yes, accept it without the guilt.
Good luck.
I'm still learning how to live, too, making small steps forward. It's incredibly hard, fighting against yourself...
And I agree that you need to stay busy. The more responsibilities you have, the "more normal" you'll feel, whatever that means. 😁

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How do you find your purpose in life? in Psychology · Aug 25, 2007

Robert Sanders3;9878175 said:People don't live for themselves anymore; they mostly live for others, especially their kids. I don't think that's right... because if you live for someone else, it becomes impossible to find your own purpose. They become your entire meaning, and you lose your true self./QUOTE]

See, this is what I find most dangerous.
Losing your true self—your essence, your core, whatever you want to call it—just because of someone or something else...
Living for yourself—and living on your own terms —is the way to go, provided you aren't hurting anyone else in the process. That’s what the meaning of life is to me.😘

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How do you find your purpose in life? in Psychology · Aug 25, 2007

Brian Moore2 said:The whole point of being alive is to spend your time doing what you actually love and what brings you joy; anything else is just a complete waste of time 🙂

Short, sweet, and simple.😘
I totally agree.
I went through this phase where I was obsessively searching for my "purpose," but I didn't realize I was actually losing myself in the process. Turns out, I probably already had that "purpose"—I just didn't know how to recognize it.

Conclusion: stop chasing things, even if it's the search for meaning itself.

It’s a dangerous rabbit hole.😠

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Acid rain effects in Health · Jun 24, 2007

So what’s the move if I actually have acid erosion and my enamel is just disappearing?

I’ve been using Sensodyne paste and honestly, I’ve stopped eating fruit, salads, and pretty much everything else because I’m totally panicking about my teeth.

Right now, it’s just soft, cooked foods and steamed veggies.

But I’m terrified I can’t live like this forever.

My enamel is incredibly thin; I’ve lost tooth volume and they’re starting to chip along the bottom edges.

Also, does coffee actually damage enamel?!

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Double major? in Law · May 20, 2007

James Cox6 said:A community college isn't a university. I mean, the name literally says "community college."

I don't think that actually answered my question.😁
Is it possible to finish a technical college program, then enroll in a university degree (self-funded) while simultaneously starting a new degree funded by the Department!!?

Okay, maybe I'm being annoying or just slow, but I really need a straight yes or no answer.😁

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Double major? in Law · May 20, 2007

I’ve got a question about this. For instance, if someone has a degree from a community college (like for business or public administration) and wants to transition into a university program which would obviously be a paid, part-time track, but they also want to enroll in a second major fully funded by the Department —say, in a science or biomedical field where part-time options aren't available—is that actually doable?

Does a community college degree count as a university degree?
If you enroll in a continuing program after community college (the kind you pay for), can you simultaneously take on another degree through the Department's funding?😁

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