8750 posts shown.
Look, some people just freeze up when it comes to making calls because they’re terrified of being held accountable for whatever happens next.
If you want to get moving, try this: grab a notebook and write down exactly what you want to achieve over a specific timeframe. Be precise about it. Start keeping a journal of everything that goes down. Just start there, and the rest will follow...
There’s also plenty of books out there on the subject—just give it a quick search on Google.
And hey, don't worry, you're going to be just fine.👍
lonegardener said:I can't say if there's hope for you... especially since I'm not sure what you mean by "hope." We all die eventually—the decisive, the indecisive, the crooked, and the righteous alike. Hmm, hope.
Anyway, here's a song that seems to fit your mood perfectly:---
Damn, I thought this song was hitting ME personally... but after reading what you wrote... umm, are you sure you didn't just write those lyrics yourself? 🙏
Holy crap, I thought THIS song was hitting ME hard... but after reading what you wrote... umm, are you sure you didn't just write those lyrics yourself? 🙏
Who even wrote this?
says:
I honestly think it all comes down to perspective. What you’re describing is just life. We all hit these crossroads, but some people just make a call and keep moving, while others—like you—get stuck in a loop, constantly revisiting what happened. I don't think it's even about the circumstances themselves; it's more about your subconscious. When you let external factors dictate your path, you're actually just fulfilling what you secretly wanted in the first place. Stop overthinking the past and dissecting everything, or you'll end up creating problems out of thin air. You're already doing it, but it's not too late to pivot. Just live. Find a new girl, grab a job that actually excites you. Don't stress over which choice is "right"—just do what feels right, even if that means letting things happen naturally. And again, that isn't "giving in," it's just your subconscious making its own choice.
But I don't know. I'm really not sure what would actually make me happy. I don't know what my deal is. Everything I look at, I somehow find a reason to walk away from...
If I actually knew what brought me joy, I'd go after it, but I feel like nothing in life is ever worth the effort. It’s pretty clear I have a broken decision-making process...
And I'm going to carry this over to the main thread 🙂
I am incredibly, paralyzingly indecisive. It’s a struggle that has haunted me for years, but it really started eating me alive once I finished college.
Life was easy enough when I was just following the script—elementary school, high school, moving along like everyone else. When it came time to pick a major, I spent forever agonizing over whether to go for a technical degree or something more liberal arts, or which specific track to take. I eventually scraped by with a choice, though looking back, I feel like I've made almost every decision since then wrong.
That suffocating feeling of being unable to choose really kicked in after I got my diploma. It usually follows this exact pattern:
1. Should I join the military or look for a civilian job? One option offered a stable career path, but I had no idea if that was actually what I wanted. Looking back now, I actually kind of regret not going, but at the time, I just couldn't wrap my head around it. By the time the window for active duty closed, I ended up in a civilian role instead.— SO, IT WASN'T REALLY A CHOICE I MADE; CIRCUMSTANCES DECIDED FOR ME. Even today, I still can't tell if I made the right call.
2. Should I take a job at a small local startup or aim for a massive corporation like Amazon or Google, even if the work would be entry-level and totally unrelated to my degree? Once the deadline passed for the big corporate applications, I just defaulted to the small firm.— IN OTHER WORDS, THE EXPIRATION DATE MADE THE DECISION FOR ME.
3. Around that same time, I met an amazing girl. But instead of stepping up, I played these weird games of "hot and cold," acting like this polished, successful engineer when I was really just winging it. I couldn't make a move. By the time I finally realized how much she meant to me, she had already moved on to someone more decisive.— AGAIN, I DIDN'T MAKE A CHOICE; I JUST LET LIFE HAPPEN TO ME..
4. After joining that small firm, I quickly realized it was a shady, poorly run operation. Still, I clung to it, telling myself, "At least I'm working in my field." I was too paralyzed to decide whether to quit, so I stayed until the whole company basically collapsed.— ONCE MORE, FATE AND CIRCUMSTANCE MADE THE CALL, NOT ME.
5. I accepted the next available job offer, even though I wasn't sure about it. I kept telling myself I needed to keep leveling up and hunting for something better, but I lacked the guts to actually pull the trigger on a big career move. Maybe I was just blind, or maybe I was just waiting for the company to fail so that DESTINY COULD DECIDE MY NEXT MOVE FOR ME AGAIN.
6. I dated someone else, but I constantly pressured her with questions about whether we were "meant to be"—almost like I was trying to force her to give me the answer I couldn't find myself. We broke up, and I wasn't even sure if that was the right move. History repeated itself: while I was sitting there overthinking whether to try and win her back, she had already found someone else.— ONCE AGAIN, I LEFT IT UP TO CHANCE AND CIRCUMSTANCE.
7. A friend offered to help me transition into a new role at a different company, but I couldn't commit. It's like I lack basic common sense sometimes; I just couldn't decide. I think I was just waiting for the "perfect moment" that never comes. Well, that moment passed. When I finally called the hiring manager to ask for another week to think it over, he told me he'd already hired someone else. And honestly? Part of me felt relieved because the decision was taken out of my hands.— I HAD ONCE AGAIN SURRENDERED MY FUTURE TO SOMEONE ELSE, and technically, I should be upset about that.
8. I bought a car, but I spent the entire time wondering if I should have taken out a loan for a newer model or if buying used was the smarter play. Predictably, I ended up pulling the trigger only when the very last one at that specific price point was left on the lot. I didn't buy it because I wanted it; I bought it out of a fear of missing a deal.
>
Basically, this graveyard of missed professional opportunities is starting to choke my personal life, too. My romantic life looks just as messy because, in that arena, I haven't been able to make a single real decision, and the ones I did manage to make turned out to be total disasters..
X-Y. It happens when I'm just buying clothes, too. I'll try everything on and leave the sales clerk standing there in complete confusion because I can't commit to a single item. If only I were this indecisive about my wardrobe and not my entire existence.
So, what's wrong with my brain?🤷
Is it a lack of courage?
Am I just lazy?
Or maybe I'm just too picky?
Maybe I wasn't built to lead, but more like a mule that needs someone constantly barking orders at it?
Or maybe I’m actually fine and just spiraling?
Or am I just a coward who's terrified of my own shadow?
I was a top-tier student, and honestly, people in my social circle think pretty highly of me. But deep down, I’m miserable. I simply don't have a clue what my life looks like six months from now, let alone five years down the line. I’m just letting life happen to me. It feels like since I graduated, I haven't even moved an inch forward.
I overanalyze everything to death every time I have to make a choice. It’s cost me countless sleepless nights, and I still walk away feeling like I picked the wrong path every single time. I think the stress is even starting to mess with my blood pressure. I don't know how to fix this. I have zero vision and the uncertainty of the future is eating me alive.
A few times in my life, I actually made the right call and it paid off big time, but lately, that sense of reward is gone. I don't feel like I'm on the right track anymore, so I can't even commit to anything. I end up looking incompetent, even though I know deep down that isn't true.
Long story short:
I don't know. Honestly, I have no idea what would actually make me happy. I don't know what's wrong with me. I find a reason to quit in every single situation....
If I actually knew what brought me joy, I’d go after it, but right now, nothing feels worth the effort. I clearly have a broken decision-making process....
Does anyone have any advice? Has anyone else felt this way? Any book recommendations? What is actually going on in my head? What do I need to let go of? What should I be working on?
Is there any hope for me?
table
tobacco
guy
to get worked up over someone
plain Jane
warehouse worker
hang it up on a coat rack
old timers
road
trouble
to swear at
an old rifle
to screw
the devil
the press
diner
the boardwalk...
placidjackal36 said:that company... but honestly, why do we still keep getting hit with that word when we have perfectly good terms like "corporation" or "firm." 🙄
A conspiracy, you say? A total conspiracy! 🧐
I love eating bananas 🤷 - and yeah, that’s basically my eternal avatar. For a little while, I actually had the American flag as my profile picture
I used to be all about weed, but nowadays I mostly just dabble with marijuana because this "plant" has become so dear to me.
I'm an Aries by birth, so naturally I've got that whole sheep energy 🤷
If we're talking about Britney Spears, I totally get him. I'd probably just lock myself in my room and do nothing else all day 😳
for real 😁
Does anyone know a good cream that won't sting open wounds? Maybe something like Aveeno or something... nothing too heavy
I have to say, the username really fits, and honestly, the baby is just precious 😍 — plus, it’s one of those timeless avatars that never goes out of style 😁
Robin Peterson4 said:In just two days, it’s my favorite singer's birthday. Man, she’s more than just a singer to me—it’s hard to even put into words how much she means. Ever since I first heard one of her tracks and saw her name, my whole world shifted. Music has become my entire purpose; I live for those moments when I can just sit back and listen to her. She’s the muse behind some of the stories I write, the calm in my storm when life gets stressful, and honestly, she's my rock. I have other artists I enjoy, sure, but nobody compares to her. My room is basically a shrine—posters, CDs, vinyl, you name it... To put it simply: I am head over heels in love with her!!!!!!!!😳
Like I said, her birthday is coming up in two days. Because she means everything to me, this day is huge. It’s a milestone that deserves a real celebration. A few weeks ago, I actually hit my "listening anniversary"—the exact one-year mark since I first discovered her music. I spent that entire day holed up in my room, sipping champagne and looking at photos of her while her discography played on loop. So, how should I celebrate this upcoming day? What can I do to make it special?
Just a heads-up: I don't have anyone nearby to share this with. None of my friends really get into her music, and they wouldn't understand the depth of what I feel, even though I've never actually seen her perform live. Any suggestions on what I could do? I don't want to just spend the whole day listening to her again, because that's exactly how I handled my one-year anniversary. What else is there to do?
Just jump off a bridge and stop annoying us with this childish stuff.☕