Posts by Anthony Bailey3

Thread jacking...
There are certain rules for how this forum should operate—rules that seem to mean less and less to people lately—and frankly, it feels like this entire section (Psychology) is losing its purpose.

This isn't some broad discussion about drug addiction... this thread is specifically about George Ramirez11 and her situation.
This conversation goes beyond anyone's idle chatter regarding escapism or whatever else; it is
a thread dedicated to a specific individual seeking actual help and support...
...it is not a playground for everyone's opinions—nor is it a battlefield for intellectual crusades.
Out of basic decency toward the person who started this, any debate on general values should be moved to the designated threads for addiction and substance abuse...

George Ramirez11, if you're still around somewhere... let us know how things are going...

Signing off...over and out...

If you aren't actually talking to me, why bother quoting my post? It makes it impossible to tell when someone is addressing me directly versus just shouting into the void at everyone else.

EDIT: Actually, why am I even stressing about this? LOL...

Noah Sanchez7 said:How many mothers walk away from their kids without being addicts? For instance, my brother's mother (on his dad's side) just flat-out abandoned him when he was three.
And how many families deal with deaths that leave a child without one or both parents?
Take my father, for example. He passed away from natural causes when I was 14. He was a casual drinker, too. Maybe that wasn't the cause, maybe it was. Even if it was, I’d be a total idiot to hate him or blame him for it.
Was alcohol more important to him than me?
What a stupid, selfish question that is!!
I love him exactly as he was, and I'll always remember him as a good man.
Actually, I'm starting to think that good people just tend to leave us sooner; it kind of makes sense.

Secondly, what's the point of all these anxiolytics and antidepressants? You say you're scared of addiction and the "high," but I have to ask: if those medications aren't that, then what are they?
I don't know if you take them, but plenty of people do.
People will argue, "Oh, that's different!" >> No, it isn't. It's the same thing, if anything, it's worse.
Ustanes, and like Dubravka would say, you "pop an antidepressant" and head out into the world >> feeling happy because you think that pill is going to fix the obvious misery inside you >> and you tell yourself, "Yeah, now I'm finally normal!"

Fuck that.
There is life and there is death. The world celebrates life and tells you to "put a smile on your face," even when nothing is funny. And then, the poor individual realizes it was much easier to
fake it through the cracks, ending up in an even deeper darkness just because they were trying to be positive.

Why hide the fact that heroin addiction significantly shortens your life... you know exactly how and why... why lie to yourself?
If you're feeling fatalistic, why assume teenah is too?

Both you and teenah have a choice regarding whether or not you die from this. I'm not defending you, and I'm not defending her either.... I'm just saying that kind of choice carries consequences for others—in this case, falling on the shoulders of a two-year-old whose father is in prison... Because at that age, I lost a parent too. And I'll carry a hole in my heart until I die because I don't have a single memory I can hold onto. Why would I want that child to go through the same thing?

For the record, I took Paxil for two weeks (it didn't even kick in), Xanax for 4 months, and I haven't touched an anxiolytic since last November. For heaven's sake, I stay away from drugs in general; I am extremely skeptical about long-term use and mixing psychotropic meds, and I really don't appreciate your sarcastic insinuations about it—I don't see why they're directed at my post.

EDIT: One more thing... I don't see how the first part of your post has anything to do with teenah's situation... She is a woman who, I believe, knows exactly what she wants, she just doesn't know if she has the strength to fight for it. Your late father, as you wrote, wasn't an alcoholic... so where is the parallel with teenah?

I've had enough of these offensive-defensive posts on this forum... It's how everything turns into an ego battle between two people when dealing with someone else's serious problems.
If this topic turns into another one of those, I'm announcing right now that I'm done posting here. I don't want to provoke anyone, and that wasn't my intention.

teenah, once again, I wish you and your child nothing but happiness and living memories of each other... all the best!

Up, there are parallels between teenah’s situation and yours—but let’s not mistake them for being identical.
Sure, she has the right to choose, but that choice comes with a massive weight of responsibility—she already made the call to carry this child despite her addiction, and thank God the baby is healthy. Now, if that kid has to watch their mother slowly fade away... in ten years, they might grow up thinking their mother didn't love them enough because she chose death over living for them. That is devastating—nobody deserves that...
The decision belongs to teenah; we can only influence things so much, if at all. If I could say anything, I’d try to nudge her toward choosing a life free from Horse instead of facing a slow, agonizing decline toward death—which is just an inevitable fact here—especially since it seems like she actually wants to live for her child.
And your situation is your own choice too... picking the lesser of two evils, as you put it.
Personally, the idea of being a slave to addiction is terrifying—I actively fight that urge to chase a "sensation seeking" high just to numb my brain for a few hours and get some rest... But when the comedown hits, everything is still right where I left it... waiting for me...

This isn't just about Teenah—it’s not just about her addiction, her health, or her life—it’s about a tiny, innocent life that deserves parental love and actual happiness. That won't happen if Teenah keeps spiraling. That's not an opinion, it's a reality—let's not kid ourselves here. Whether she felt "fine" while on horse or not, her body, soul, and mind are essentially prisoners, rotting away at high speed.
I really hope you find the strength to fight this, because I know you want what's best for your child—you want to be there, to love them—but you have to want what's best for yourself too, and horse has zero place in a long-term plan. Given that you've been struggling with addiction for ten years, you should consider yourself lucky the little one was born healthy—and for them to stay that way, they need a healthy mother.
Deep down, looking into those eyes, you surely realize what needs to happen next... I just hope you can actually pull it off. The battle is inevitable—against yourself, against the world—but that little soul you're carrying is worth every bit of it. Don't let yourself become nothing more than a faded memory in a photo album.
I honestly don't know if any of the posts on this forum can truly help...
Just please, don't be too afraid to reach out for help!

My leg usually jerks—mostly when I’m dreaming about climbing, descending, or falling... and I can never tell if I actually tried to sit up or if my leg just slammed into the other one because it felt like it was suspended mid-air.
Even aside from that, lately I’ve been feeling so wound up before bed due to some dark thoughts—it causes my arm or leg to twitch, leaving me with this bizarre sensation in my head where it feels like I'm jerking awake from a half-sleep. I hate it; it’s a truly miserable feeling.

For instance—Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter...and Spring by Who is Ki-duka

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0374546/

Zenovski is actually being positive here