Posts by Sandra Parker3

ambersailor85 said:Spot on. 😁 It really depends on the crowd you hang out with in your neck of the woods, but individually, we're all just chasing our own wins, satisfaction, and progress.

There used to be this saying that the crazy and the kind are brothers. I feel the same way about selflessness—honestly, anyone with a decent sense of self-worth is probably more valuable than someone who's just being selfless to mask deep insecurities.

Why does this happen? There are plenty of reasons—how parents raised us, feeling like an outcast during school years, or just getting burned by dating.😁

Money plays such a massive role in everything, too. Once money enters a circle of friends, those friendships usually vanish—though, let's be real, they probably weren't even real to begin with. 🤣 Money just gave them a reason to stop pretending.

And then there's that whole "survival of the fittest" vibe that runs through society.

+

ambersailor85 said:I feel like being selfish is actually the healthier route, because nothing beats that self-love feeling. Everything else should be based on what people earn.😁 If you don't have some Schengen-level security in your own life, you just end up getting walked all over.

Selfishness might get a bad rap, but 😁 it's what drives us—it gives you that edge, that competitive spark, and actual strength. Being naive just keeps you stuck exactly where you started.

I suspect someone who is purely selfless had to go through some rough stuff to become that way. You've got bad people who act selfless just to quiet their conscience, but I think those types are usually just indifferent or depressed—it’s like trying to hold onto sand as it slips through your fingers.

It's just human nature, really—once we see an opportunity to gain something, we want to squeeze every bit of potential out of it.

Take me, for example—growing up with older siblings meant there was always this constant competition to get my fair share, even when I was just a kid. I always made sure to look out for my own interests. They were all competing against each other, too.

The real issue is when everything comes too easy... you lose that drive to fight, whether it's for survival, status, or social standing. It makes things way too effortless.

So, do you think selfless people should see a therapist? It seems to me 🤣
btw, I don't think anyone actually fits perfectly into a box; nobody is entirely selfish or entirely selfless all the time, it’s just that our actions lean one way or the other more than others.

I think it's healthier to be selfish, because nothing beats loving yourself.

Drew Flores3 already pointed this out, but it's worth repeating... selfishness and self-love aren't the same thing, so you can't just use them interchangeably.

ambersailor85 said:Maybe it's some kind of punishment then—like they physically can't feed themselves.
But clearly, that new info isn't sinking in, because people don't eat with their hands, they use their heads. It's probably like being blind—they just don't see the obstacles in front of them.

True, but when someone is selfish and greedy, once they realize there's nothing left to take from you, they aren't gonna stick around to help.🙂

If Person A has a spoonful of food and Person B has none, Person A isn't exactly thinking, "Hey, let me give this to them, maybe they'll share their spoon later."

So basically, it comes down to a lack of trust, suspicion, and greed.

If you've got Person A who's broke and Person B who's loaded, Person B isn't gonna hand anything over if they're just selfish, greedy, and tight-fisted.🤷

Look, I'm just saying that being selfish doesn't necessarily mean you're stupid; in fact, quite often it's the exact opposite, as people can be incredibly clever when they're plotting ways to look out for themselves at everyone else's expense—which, if I had to guess, is basically the textbook definition of selfishness.
So, they’re basically assuming there’s going to be some level of interaction or cooperation—maybe even giving a little something up just to score big in the end. Bingo.

Sandra Parker3 said:

Look, when someone is just fundamentally selfish and greedy, the second they realize you aren't useful to them anymore, they’re going to stop showing you any kind of loyalty. 🙂

I mean, it can't be right, but honestly, I have no clue how that even fits into the whole story.

Sandra Parker3

If Person A is holding a spoon full of food and Person B has nothing, you can bet your life Person A isn't thinking, "Hey, I'll share this with them, and then they'll return the favor later." Maybe. I’d rather just eat with my own spoon later.

If he calculates that he’s going to need it, he’ll provide it—he'll just make sure there's a solid "gentleman's agreement" in place to ensure he gets it back. But honestly, he'll pay it back, interest and all, without any of that "maybe" nonsense.

Sandra Parker3

It just comes down to this deep-seated mistrust, greed, and constant suspicion.

It’s all great on paper, but let’s be real: those three will always work together to push their own "greater good" agendas. Criminals are usually the first ones to team up, and you can bet there's plenty of self-interest driving the whole thing.

ambersailor85 said:Not sure where I picked this up, but it’s a killer metaphor for how society works today—even if it feels like an old fable from somewhere out East.

Basically, some higher power decides that when you pass away, you head to a place that looks like a dining room filled with every delicious meal imaginable. The rule is simple: once you've eaten, you get to indulge in whatever your heart desires next—whether that's just lounging around, chasing romance, or whatever else—and the cycle just repeats every day. It doesn't matter if you were a saint or a sinner; everyone goes to the same place. The only catch? You have to eat using chopsticks that are over six feet long.

Selfish people who end up there can never actually enjoy anything. Their greed drives them to try and grab as much food as possible, but they’ll never succeed because those massive chopsticks make it impossible to grab a bite. On the flip side, generous people will just feed one another and live better than they ever did on Earth.

What’s your take on the people who only care about themselves?

I heard this specific version was used to describe the souls stuck in Hell.

I don't think they're quite that dimwitted🤷 they'll realize pretty quickly that it's smarter to grab a bite and move on to the next party. You have to watch your figure, you know? Don't linger too long in one spot or things start looking suspicious.
Besides, it's easy enough to find a partner in crime to help each other out—you know, that whole "I scratch your back, you scratch mine" thing... then they head off to their next craving, either working together or just trading favors.🙏

You've got a point there; it's a perfect snapshot of how society works today. The "generous" types feed off each other for a good time... right up until someone starts snitching.🙄
Meanwhile, the little selfish types are left starving.😢

It's funny how we can look at the exact same behavior and see it so differently.

I honestly thought you guys actually could, and would... like, go in and fix signatures for people who are practically begging for it

but honestly, it’s just completely pointless to me

The absolute dumbest part of this whole setup is that moderators still have the power to mess with people's signatures... apparently some folks actually enjoy that, right? 🙄 🙏

Jerry King11 said:And look how they've overcomplicated things here! 😁 😍

French philosophers Vladimir Jankélévitch and Jacques Derrida argue that the human condition is fundamentally fractured. They suggest that our dignity isn't preserved by the possibility of forgiveness, but rather by its impossibility. According to Jankélévitch (Pardonner?), true forgiveness requires the offender to feel genuine remorse first. But when it comes to those horrific, monstrous crimes that transcend even the concept of radical evil—think of the atrocities seen in places like Memphis—forgiveness simply cannot happen. In those cases, you can't forgive, not just for your own sake, but out of respect for the victims. To forgive would be to offer a cheap reconciliation and to wipe away what was done. Therefore, forgiveness must remain impossible: “We did not intend to reconcile the irrationality of evil with the omnipotence of love. Forgiveness is as powerful as evil, but evil is as powerful as forgiveness... Forgiveness is stronger than evil, yet evil is stronger than forgiveness. I cannot escape this.” Derrida (Pardonner: l'impardonnable et l'imprescriptible), in his reflections on the matter, initially critiques Jankélévitch’s view that remorse must precede forgiveness. He felt that such a requirement turns forgiveness into a kind of market transaction, where the one forgiving acts as a master or ruler over the one seeking it. On the other hand, Derrida also agrees with Jankélévitch that forgiveness must remain an impossibility. However, unlike Jankélévitch, Derrida doesn't think this means forgiveness doesn't exist; he believes it exists specifically *as* an impossibility. The truth and essence of forgiveness lies in this very impossibility: we must constantly forgive and constantly seek forgiveness because it persists as an unattainable ideal. It remains impossible because humans are inherently broken beings who are perpetually in debt to one another, whether through forgiving or seeking pardon: “I must seek forgiveness in order to be just... But I must also seek forgiveness because I am just, because of the fact that I am just; for in wanting to become just, I am unjust and I betray... Because it is unjust to be just. I am always betraying someone to become just; I am always sacrificing one thing for another, just as I breathe.” Thus, the impossibility of forgiveness triggers a continuous, unstoppable process of forgiving (Derrida also viewed writing as a constant way of seeking forgiveness). It is only through this impossibility of forgiveness, which dethrones the egoism of "possibility," that a person can remain true to forgiveness itself, to the other person, and to themselves.

All this to explain Christian forgiveness.

Søren Kierkegaard concludes: “Love hides a multitude of sins, because love does not allow sin to take root; it destroys it at birth.” In this sense, forgiveness—being an act of love—doesn't give sin a chance; instead, it opens the door to a new beginning. We see a similar sentiment in the work of Simone Weil (La pesanteur et la grâce), who puts it succinctly: “I, too, am different from the person you imagine me to be. To know that is forgiveness.” Forgiveness, then, allows us to think differently about ourselves. We could expand on Weil’s thought: thinking differently about ourselves and others within God. God constantly allows a person to be different, to not get stuck in hatred or vengeance, and to not dwell in the despair of a sin that clouds one's view of the horizons of Divine hope.

They also touched on the struggle of seeking forgiveness for the wrongs we have committed ourselves.

🙂

this part:

..... Jacques Derrida (Pardon: the unpardonable and the imprescriptible) in his reflections on forgiveness first criticizes the view held by Vladimir Jankélévitch that forgiveness must be preceded by repentance, because that would reduce forgiveness to a mere market economy, where the one forgiving acts as a powerful master over the penitent.

the truth is, the person doing the forgiving is always positioning themselves above the person they are forgiving.

you don't even need to demand prior repentance, because the act of forgiving itself can serve as an implicit acknowledgment that there was a need for regret in the first place.

Have you ever been in a situation where someone tells you "I forgive you," and you have absolutely no idea why, or see any logic or reason behind it? 🤷

You can easily manipulate those words to play the victim—essentially triggering guilt or remorse in the other person while elevating yourself as this incredibly magnanimous forgiver. 🙄

And that's just one more reason why forgiveness is a total joke.

Susan Price30 said:Christianity is built upon Revelation and Tradition—if we set aside the theological treatises of great theologians and the Holy Fathers throughout history. Therefore, based most heavily on oral Tradition, early Christians knew what Jesus looked like. They knew he had green eyes, long dark hair, was tall, athletic, and had a darker complexion. Then there is the Shroud of Turin, or perhaps relevant historical books from the historians of Jesus's era and his contemporaries who wrote about him. For instance, the works of ancient Roman historians like Flavia or Josephus are quite interesting.

(I recall someone sharing links to some modern books regarding the historical aspect and life of Jesus here, but I can't find the thread right now because I can't remember the title.)

I am not sure what you are asking me or what you are insisting on. Are you questioning the existence of Jesus, or do you simply believe that all the paintings, icons, and even the Raphaels aren't a faithful representation of the image of Jesus as we consider him to be through Tradition?

And why is this so important here and now, in this specific thread? I truly don't understand... is it because you got the impression that I worship Jesus? Of course I worship Him 🤣 and love Him with all my being; it's no secret.

Honestly, nuns actually have the privilege of being officially wed to Him.😁 Personally, I would love nothing more than to retreat to a monastery and spend the rest of my days in communion with God and nothing else, but that isn't my calling...

I don't know, no offense intended, but he's always just looked a little scrawny to me in all those paintings.
And that whole "exceptionally attractive" thing—where did that even come from?

I'd honestly love to just head off to some monastery and spend the rest of my day in communion with God and nothing else, but that's just not my calling...

Just the rest of one day? Honestly, looking at your posts, I'd say you'd probably want to devote way more time to Him🤷

Chloe Hughes15 said:Man, those are some incredibly blunt critiques! 🙏

🙏

Correcting a mistake is tolerated, and sometimes even encouraged.
As for offensive comments, I’d say it really comes down to context. 🤔 Not everything carries the same weight.
I think I told you this last time too, but we can't just compile a list of banned words. It’s like that whole debate about emojis—for one person, an emoji might feel like they're throwing money at a Rolls Royce, 🙄 while to some Bulgarian guy who drops by DZ occasionally, that same emoji just represents pure surprise. 🤷

Honestly, I'm curious to see how you'll actually draft that into the PDF rules.
It’s obviously impossible to make a list of "unpleasant" words because everything depends on context.
To me, this rule about "insulting the interlocutor" feels redundant—or maybe excessive?

I haven't read the thread about emojis, but once, someone gave me a red card just for typing "cccc." 🙄

Look, I was just asking, I really don't have the energy to argue about this. 🙂

That’s a post that needs to be sanctioned, and I’ll do it as soon as I send this.
I don't get why C. A. didn't report it.

I have no idea what C. A. is thinking.
I just saw that you were posting on the same page, so I assumed you'd seen that post too.

Susan Price30 said:

What was written above in bold is pathetic—to put it mildly. It’s an attempt to equate the victim with the perpetrator.

It certainly doesn't equate them; rather, it states exactly what is written—by forgiving (releasing) others, we forgive (release) ourselves as well.

(Of course, there are different situations, but generally speaking this holds true.)

And often, this also applies: someone who finds it difficult to forgive themselves will find it just as difficult to forgive others.

Yeah, but you wrote that the victim too often judges themselves as well
which completely changes the meaning of the forgiveness you were talking about.

And... the main issue is what there is to actually forgive oneself for if the victim 🤷
has absolutely nothing
to be guilty of. So the point is that we shouldn't try to manufacture guilt in a victim by saying stuff like "forgive yourself too." 🙄

It's often true that someone who struggles to forgive themselves will struggle to forgive anyone else.

Well, that's just being consistent.

Jerry King11 said:if we're blaming ourselves for some evil done to us when we aren't actually at fault, then we need to deal with that "imposed" guilt through logic, rather than relying on some imaginary act of forgiving the other person (which is supposed to forgive ourselves in the process)😲

First, you have to realize for yourself that you aren't guilty; after that, if someone wants to forgive the other person, they can do whatever they want—forgive or let go, it doesn't matter much

that bolded part above is honestly pathetic, and I'm trying to keep my language civil here, but it's just a desperate attempt to equate the victim with the perpetrator

anyway, where did that post go? 🤷

if we're blaming ourselves for some evil done to us when we aren't actually at fault, then we need to deal with that "imposed" guilt through logic, rather than relying on some imaginary act of forgiving the other person (which is supposed to forgive ourselves in the process)😲

First, you have to realize for yourself that you aren't guilty; after that, if someone wants to forgive the other person, they can do whatever they want—forgive or let go, it doesn't matter much

that bolded part above is honestly pathetic, and I'm trying to keep my language civil here, but it's just a desperate attempt to equate the victim with the perpetrator

anyway, where did that post go? 🤷
I don't know, maybe Susan Price30 thought otherwise and just deleted it. 🤷 Personally, I've often wondered if, even when you're the victim of a crime, you might ask yourself why it happened to you "karmically"—what drew that suffering or that specific person into your life in the first place... I can't shake the feeling that nothing happens by pure accident. Even though the perpetrator remains the perpetrator and their evil stays with them, why did you find yourself in the position of the victim to begin with? People ask "Why me?" all the time. Maybe it has nothing to do with the culprit; maybe they were just the medium through which evil reached you. Perhaps your own lifestyle or choices triggered that landslide, or maybe it's a way for you to change yourself. That doesn't absolve the perpetrator of their guilt, obviously... It's just a question of meaning.
I don't know, maybe Susan Price30 thought otherwise and just deleted it. 🤷 Personally, I've often wondered if, even when you're the victim of a crime, you might ask yourself why it happened to you "karmically"—what drew that suffering or that specific person into your life in the first place... I can't shake the feeling that nothing happens by pure accident. Even though the perpetrator remains the perpetrator and their evil stays with them, why did you find yourself in the position of the victim to begin with? People ask "Why me?" all the time. Maybe it has nothing to do with the culprit; maybe they were just the medium through which evil reached you. Perhaps your own lifestyle or choices triggered that landslide, or maybe it's a way for you to change yourself. That doesn't absolve the perpetrator of their guilt, obviously... It's just a question of meaning.


I get roughly what you're getting at, but my first thought reading your post was that old cliché about how a woman who dresses "provocatively" attracts predators 🤷

That doesn't absolve the perpetrator of their guilt at all... It's really a question of purpose.

Personally, I see it as a matter of the order of our choices—if we view every action as a choice, there's nothing particularly mystical about it.

Don't people constantly ask themselves, "Why me?!"

This reminded me of something... I was listening to a priest, or a minister, or whatever... he was probably trying to answer that question we all ask during our darkest moments.

I was actually paying attention to what he had to say (he was reading from his 🙄Book😲...) and the answer was basically along the lines of "it's waiting for you."

Grace Sullivan42 said:It’s fine over in Linguistics, but we don't allow that kind of thing in the rest of DZ. Unfortunately, we didn't explicitly put it in the subforum rules, but I honestly figured the veteran members would just know better...

Like I said before, I’d add...
I’m genuinely curious about how you guys plan to handle the PDF rulebook—specifically, how on earth you're going to decide where exactly the line is drawn regarding what's actually tolerated.

Just a quick correction here.
So, is it just a simple correction, or are we adding a little extra flair to make the comment more tempting?

Since I'm already here, I might as well ask one more thing.
The PDF rules clearly state that directed insults toward other users aren't allowed.
And that was actually how they did things.

Look, I already know all about how moderation is basically just a messy social science...
But what on earth is this supposed to be?

To the OP, you’re completely out of line. Screw your liberal fascism and everything you stand for. Do you even know how to speak American?

It’s not directed at anyone here... it isn't profanity... it just isn't... 🤷
Just let me know when I should show up.

Sorry for barging in like this.

Thanks.

Jerry King11 said:Yeah, that’s an interesting and vital point. We often find ourselves blaming ourselves for why someone would act maliciously in the first place, wondering if we somehow invited it or deserved it...

Yeah, that’s an interesting and pretty vital point. It happens where we end up blaming ourselves for why something bad happened to us in the first place, wondering if we somehow deserved it...[/I]
if we're blaming ourselves for some evil done to us when we aren't actually at fault, then we need to deal with that "imposed" guilt through logic, rather than relying on some imaginary act of forgiving the other person (which is supposed to forgive ourselves in the process)😲

First, you have to realize for yourself that you aren't guilty; after that, if someone wants to forgive the other person, they can do whatever they want—forgive or let go, it doesn't matter much

that bolded part above is honestly pathetic, and I'm trying to keep my language civil here, but it's just a desperate attempt to equate the victim with the perpetrator

anyway, where did that post go? 🤷

Anonymous said:Well!
What can I even say to that...

I think it's pretty obvious now. I am at peace.🙂
I responded to your provocation with silence.
Does that make me credible? Or am I just a liar, like you suddenly claimed I was...

You... you're just aimless...

I don't have enemies.
But then again, I don't have specific friends either.😁
At least not by name; everyone and everything is a friend to me.
So, here I am, just existing on my own in this vast space (surrounded by good vibes).🤣
It's fine.
I understand it all.
But I'm not going to brag about it.🙂
Take care.👋

I wasn't provoking you at all

Am I credible? Or am I a liar, just like you suddenly called me...

I didn't call you a liar

I said you don't seem convinced by what you're saying, because you kept repeating "it doesn't bother me, it doesn't touch me, I won't let it, it can't..."
usually that's just a sign of someone trying to convince themselves of something, which means it's not actually there yet.

it's the same way I don't feel like you're at peace right now either
I don't think a person can be that way and simultaneously view a very mild comment as a provocation
and take my lack of conviction in your words as if I were telling you that you're lying🤷

there you go

You... colorless...

...

Jose Ramirez36 said:That was quite the dramatic conclusion you drew there—and look, it’s perfectly fine to have an opinion—but it isn't particularly fair to impose your perspective as if it were the singular, objective truth. While I give it more thought, my own reflections centered more on forgiveness through a psychological and sociological lens; though, to be honest, I've always felt it's a concept far too elusive to pin down strictly within those social sciences. So, I leaned toward the spiritual side of things. That said, I see many others here have tied it back to religious contexts—which wasn't exactly my primary aim, but I suppose connections happen.

The reality is that for me—and for a few others participating in this thread—forgiveness is a practical tool. It helps us navigate the darker sides of human relationships so we can focus on the good ones; after all, life is far too short to spend our precious mental energy revolving around negativity. Now, some might label what I’m describing as mere common sense, or perhaps simple acceptance, or even just tolerance. They’re all incredibly similar, really, but I feel we’ve drifted somewhat into a semantic debate over linguistics rather than actually dissecting the actual mechanism of understanding, acceptance, forgiveness... or whatever term one chooses to use.

At its core, I was simply describing a way of living that makes me happier, more content, and generally more at peace. I realize there will always be a segment of the population that sees no point in this approach—people who likely possess entirely different internal mechanisms that (one hopes) keep them happy and fulfilled. My ultimate hope, however, is that perhaps someone prompted by this discussion might start reflecting on these themes and stumble upon even a tiny insight that makes their life a little brighter, if only for a moment. 🙂

Yeah, it’s basically like a preventative measure—kind of clearing out the mental clutter or bad moods before they take over, which just leaves more room for positive vibes and healthier ways of acting...

(I won't quote the rest of what you wrote, regardless of what you call that mechanism...)

hiddenhound3 said:

so, why not?

🙂

so, why not?

🙂
Let's stop the guesswork; you aren't in their shoes, so just be happy about that.

I am not entirely sure what the purpose of their existence even is 🤷

If they weren't necessary, they wouldn't be here.

but I am convinced that anyone can dig up at least a tiny grain of evil within themselves
and that happens without any help from the global Evil that binds it all together

That isn't the whole story. It is easy to be kind to those who are kind, but it is precisely when we face such destructive and persistent evil that our spiritual strength and humanity are truly tested. After all, we are talking about human beings, regardless of how much trash they may be.

what will we nurture, and will we be fascinated by the grain of evil we find 🤷
the choice is mostly ours

I do not believe in the possibility of choice. Not at all.

in the search for ourselves, we look for the good, yet we stumble upon things we didn't expect, don't we? (and vice versa)

I cannot speak for you, but the goal of my journey is simply the travel itself—exploration, discovery, and understanding; I am not searching for anything specific.

"We all have villains in the US, but we also have love and peace. So why not give peace a chance for once."

because humans are a corrupt race, filthy and wicked.. and peace isn't actually what interests us; rather, as I mentioned, most people are driven by profit—do you not believe me? If you doubt it, just look around you. Perhaps there is some truth to the idea that we live in a purgatory, because this certainly isn't paradise, nor is it hell itself.

I realize my line of thinking is peculiar and perhaps sounds contradictory, but I find myself drawn to paradoxes—understanding extremes, where philanthropy bleeds into misanthropy and back again. The interventions I make in this world mean nothing more than that; as an individual, I am far too weak, too small, and too insignificant to change anything. The world certainly would not look this way if I happened to be the CEO of the universe, but I am not. And since I am not the boss, I have no right to act as a judge either. I can only be an observer. I see where I stand, and from this vantage point, I have no license to participate in the dramatic narrative where the three main characters exist: the Prosecutor, the defense attorney, and the judge. I am not even a juror or a victim; I am merely the audience, drawing intimate conclusions. I believe I am much closer to objectivity the less I involve myself and the more I maintain my position as an observer. Yet, even in this grand drama of life, that is not a rewarding role, as I witness so many things but am powerless to act. To me, it feels as though most people are simply in the wrong place at the wrong time... being human is not an easy thing to navigate.🙂

so, why not?

🙂
Let's stop the guesswork; you aren't in their shoes, so just be happy about that.

I am not entirely sure what the purpose of their existence even is 🤷

If they weren't necessary, they wouldn't be here.

but I am convinced that anyone can dig up at least a tiny grain of evil within themselves
and that happens without any help from the global Evil that binds it all together

That isn't the whole story. It is easy to be kind to those who are kind, but it is precisely when we face such destructive and persistent evil that our spiritual strength and humanity are truly tested. After all, we are talking about human beings, regardless of how much trash they may be.

what will we nurture, and will we be fascinated by the grain of evil we find 🤷
the choice is mostly ours

I do not believe in the possibility of choice. Not at all.

in the search for ourselves, we look for the good, yet we stumble upon things we didn't expect, don't we? (and vice versa)

I cannot speak for you, but the goal of my journey is simply the travel itself—exploration, discovery, and understanding; I am not searching for anything specific.

"We all have villains in the US, but we also have love and peace. So why not give peace a chance for once."

because humans are a corrupt race, filthy and wicked.. and peace isn't actually what interests us; rather, as I mentioned, most people are driven by profit—do you not believe me? If you doubt it, just look around you. Perhaps there is some truth to the idea that we live in a purgatory, because this certainly isn't paradise, nor is it hell itself.

I realize my line of thinking is peculiar and perhaps sounds contradictory, but I find myself drawn to paradoxes—understanding extremes, where philanthropy bleeds into misanthropy and back again. The interventions I make in this world mean nothing more than that; as an individual, I am far too weak, too small, and too insignificant to change anything. The world certainly would not look this way if I happened to be the CEO of the universe, but I am not. And since I am not the boss, I have no right to act as a judge either. I can only be an observer. I see where I stand, and from this vantage point, I have no license to participate in the dramatic narrative where the three main characters exist: the Prosecutor, the defense attorney, and the judge. I am not even a juror or a victim; I am merely the audience, drawing intimate conclusions. I believe I am much closer to objectivity the less I involve myself and the more I maintain my position as an observer. Yet, even in this grand drama of life, that is not a rewarding role, as I witness so many things but am powerless to act. To me, it feels as though most people are simply in the wrong place at the wrong time... being human is not an easy thing to navigate.🙂
Yeah, maybe there’s something to that, but they are still sad and need some tenderness

if they weren't needed, they wouldn't be here.

maybe they're just a cosmic mistake

or maybe just part of the food chain... 🤷

it isn't just about that. it's easy to be good to the good ones, but it's precisely when we face such destructive, constant evil that our spiritual strength and humanity really show up. regardless, we're talking about people, even if they are total garbage.

bolded:
it isn't easy
if we simplify things and strip away the extremes, then everyone around us is "good," but maintaining, leading, creating, and preserving relationships isn't easy at all, no matter how "good" those people are. it takes a massive amount of energy and "finesse" to establish that kind of dynamic, to work on your own basic assumptions first, and so on—it all comes down to interconnectedness... assuming, of course, that we actually want healthy relationships, and I don't see why we wouldn't

I don't believe in the possibility of choice. None at all.

damn, that can't be right 🤷
and you didn't exactly choose to take me off your block list 😁 🙏

I don't know about you, but my life's goal is just the journey itself—experiencing, learning, understanding—I'm not looking for anything specific.

Sure, that would be if we were talking about life in generalities, but I meant, you know... one session, you sink into your recliner and let your brain wander into analysis 😁
you've never stumbled onto something unexpected, and now you'll say you weren't even looking for it... tell me, has deep self-analysis ever led you down a path you hadn't known before? Have you ever been uncomfortably surprised? Because I have.

honestly, people are just a corrupt species—filthy and malicious.. and peace isn't actually what we're after. Like I said, most people are just chasing a buck. Don't believe me? Just look around you. Maybe there's a reason people claim we're living in purgatory; this definitely isn't paradise, but it isn't hell either....

I don't know..... why do you assume profit is inherently negative?
I don't see anything wrong with people profiting in certain relationships, or even striving for it—the line should probably be drawn somewhere around when the other person clearly starts losing out.... something like that

Anyway.... and regarding the whole idea of free will... humans are a corrupt race, yet He still allowed (the choice) for them to tear Gordana Quota away from Him 🙂

personally, it feels to me like most people are just in the wrong place at the wrong time.. we aren't great at being alone with ourselves🙂

now you're just speculating
if it weren't necessary, they wouldn't have been in that spot at that moment

and why is there nothing under the smiley face😢

goodnight

dustyraven26 said:The very nature of being hurt is rooted in relationship; where there is a connection, there is inevitably comparison against an ideal or an expectation.
But I won't linger on the point too long.

That is precisely my own view.

And where exactly is the connection? 🤷
Clearly you missed my point entirely, but whatever.

dustyraven26 said:I have had the opportunity to associate with people who lived through the hell of Memphis, San Francisco, and Boston. I understand their traumas, particularly those of the individuals who were merely children at the time.

In my view, the current administration is truly "sick"; they seem far more preoccupied with funneling former public assets into private pockets than they are with providing adequate support to those victims.

However, every government is simply a reflection of its people. It is the citizenry that provides the strength behind the leadership. Consequently, if the government is failing, the nation itself is "sick"—devoid of empathy for individual suffering. In the web of human relationships, some even find these tragedies convenient, as they make their own struggles seem less significant by comparison.

Three ideological empires keep the populace "sick":

1. Collectivism, manifested through authority figures and leaders. It was precisely this force, appearing in the guise of extreme nationalism, that acted as the catalyst for war in this region. Thanks to the global movement toward individualization, human rights, and civil liberties, this empire is finally crumbling.

2. The market, expressed through consumerism. The modern crisis suggests that the market is not nearly as powerful a regulator as we once believed. The premise where profits are privatized while losses are socialized—borne by the taxpayers—is increasingly exposed as hypocritical. Furthermore, consumerism does not aim to satisfy human needs, but rather to generate profit by fueling a constant craving for material goods, effectively turning people into slaves to their possessions.

3. Institutionalized and ritualized religions. Since the primary function of any institution is to protect itself rather than fulfill its founding purpose, organized religions are showing an increasing inability to address contemporary challenges. Invoking tradition is merely a way to mask this impotence. The modern person is fundamentally different from those living two or three millennia ago.

Once these three ideological empires collapse within the human mind, the process of individualization will reach its conclusion, and a person will finally stand alone with themselves. Only then will they have a genuine chance to "heal"—not because they were told to, but because they realize that love and harmony represent true spiritual fulfillment. That is the only actual escape from suffering.

I honestly think we’re just going to be dealing with these little bouts of sickness every now and then.

hiddenhound3 said:Absolutely! These individuals are part of the very universe we inhabit, and I am firmly convinced they are far more miserable, being nothing more than products of this tragic world. It is certainly not an easy existence to be a monster. However, I find myself disinclined to dwell on the same point repeatedly; in my view, all people possess an equal measure of value—or lack thereof. In fact, I maintain the belief that they exist here specifically to mirror our own failings, serving as reminders that a small piece of them resides within each one of us.

it honestly feels like most people are actually pretty comfortable in their own skin

I don't really want to keep repeating myself, because to me, everyone is equally (un)worthy. In fact, I think they're here to hold up a mirror to our flaws and show us that there's a little bit of them hiding inside every one of us.

I'm not sure what the point of their existence is 🤷, but I'm convinced anyone can dig up at least a tiny grain of evil within themselves
without needing any help from some massive, global Evil that ties it all together

whether we decide to nurture it or if we'll just be fascinated by finding that little speck of darkness 🤷
is mostly up to us

When we search for ourselves, we look for the good, but we end up stumbling onto things we didn't expect either, right? (And vice versa too)

but...

"We all have villains in the US, but we also have love and peace. So why not give peace a chance for once."

John Lennon

so, why not?

🙂

Thomas Garcia71 said:

they deserve even more attention, honestly... because they're hurting and they really just need some patience and warmth."

I mean, I guess there's some truth to that, if you're talking about getting them actual professional help or finding a community for them. I know from experience... I once tried to show some kindness and common sense to this totally toxic, bitter person, but man, it was such a massive waste of my time and energy.
You just can't fix everything.

Yeah, sure, maybe, but when exactly does that happen?

after they've already done all the damage they did 😕

edit:
Why would you even bother trying to "rehabilitate" a war criminal? 🤷
It might sound naive, but that guy isn't going to have any more opportunities to commit atrocities, so what's the point?

hiddenhound3 said:Well, that specific part of your comment certainly clarifies things.

To be clear, I am not recounting any personal grievances here. I am simply stating that people can be untrustworthy, malicious, and greedy, though those are not my personal observations—as if life has somehow coddled me or the people I associate with aren't wonderful, which wouldn't be the case if they weren't my friends in the first place 😍 What I have laid out refers to the broader scope of humanity and civilization at large. I am speaking objectively about the history of continents like Africa, Asia, and South America being colonized, looted, and humiliated; the cultural genocide and missionary work forced upon indigenous populations; the slave trade; the exploitation of children in sweatshops within the fashion industry; sexual abuse and human trafficking; and ideologies like fascism or Nazism. I am also referring to the economy of suffering, the glorification of victimhood used for blackmail (such as Zionism or certain social movements), corrupt political systems that shield criminality, the black market for human flesh in North Korea, the tragedies of Easter Island, and the genocide in Srebrenica—all while great and humane American and international justice continues to deny such atrocities occurred. This is woven into the very fabric of our civilization, proving that humans are, at their core, predatory, selfish, grasping, cold, and utterly inhuman creatures driven solely by profit. Call them scum, call them filth, call them cosmic waste; name it whatever you wish.

Is a person truly capable of being forgiven simply for being human?

The events occurring in my immediate vicinity feel insignificant to me; thank God, I have never been a part of any greater crime 🙏

EDIT: Every single thing I mentioned took place in our recent history and continues to unfold today. Do you honestly believe that people are inherently good and that they are only driven to commit such monstrous acts by someone else's negative energy (which I assume you were implying was mine)? 🤷

It seems like you’re speaking from your own personal experience, which makes it hard for me to wrap my head around why you hold such a bleak view of everything when you have such wonderful people around you. You mentioned those bright spots earlier and said you wouldn't generalize, but honestly, it feels like that's exactly what you're doing.

What I was talking about applies to all of humanity—to civilization and people in general. I’m looking at this objectively: the colonization and systematic looting of Africa, Asia, and South America, where entire populations were humiliated through cultural genocide and forced missionary work. I mean the slave trade, the exploitation of children in sweatshops for the fashion industry, and the horrors of sexual abuse and human trafficking. I’m talking about fascism, Nazism, the business of misery, and how certain groups weaponize victimhood for blackmail. I'm talking about corrupt politics that protect criminals, the black market for human organs in North Korea, the mysteries of Easter Island, and the genocide at Srebrenica—not to mention how some people still refuse to even call it a genocide. Grand and compassionate. The core principles of Western justice and global ethics—things that have been woven into the very fabric of our civilization—all point to the fact that... People have become such predatory, selfish, greedy, cold-hearted, inhuman, disgusting pieces of trash lately—nothing matters to them except their own damn profit. Total scum, honestly. Just absolute cosmic waste. Call it whatever you want...

And you actually think all that junk and space debris... They deserve way more attention than they get, mostly because they're miserable and because... They really just need some patience and a little warmth." 😕 😕

Can you really forgive someone just for being human?

I don't believe in forgiveness—I just don't see the point. I'm pretty sure I've already ranted about this somewhere else.

Look, everything I just said actually happened in our recent past, and honestly, it’s still happening right now. Do you seriously believe people are inherently good and that they only commit these kinds of monstrous atrocities because someone else's negative energy—which I assume you're implying is mine—pushed them to it? 🤷

I wasn't really aiming that at you, why would you think that?

Some people are just pure good, others are straight-up villains; there’s always that gray area in all of us where the light and the dark kind of bleed together. 😁 everything stays within the lines

but honestly, why wouldn't you make life a little easier on yourself? all it takes is a bit of patience, chilling out, not jumping to conclusions so fast, and maybe wearing that cliché smile we all know too well
and besides, how can you be so sure... maybe if you just calm down some idiot, he won't walk through his front door and ignore his wife just because she served him lukewarm soup🤷

dustyraven26 said:I am not quite sure if we are even discussing the same thing here, or if you feel similarly wounded because a bird decided to drop its mess on your head or a baby accidentally soiled your lap.🤷

I was actually thinking about much more serious accidents than just some chemical runoff. 🤷

Just because you understand and accept that an "accident" happened doesn't mean you aren't hurting inside.

Life keeps moving... and all this new input just makes the whole picture clearer.
Look, the most important thing to take away from what you said is this: being hurt—if you even are—doesn't have to stop you from understanding or accepting the truth.

Look, I can accept the whole "misunderstanding" and everything else that went down, but that doesn't mean I'm some kind of robot without feelings. It’s perfectly logical to acknowledge that I was hurt at one point, and honestly, I don't see why that's such a big deal to just understand.

I don't really go for the whole idea of forgiveness, honestly. It feels like you're trying to wipe away more than just the mistake itself; it's like you're attempting to erase the actual impact it had on you, which isn't really possible because those feelings become a part of who we are, right? But I guess there’s a lot more to unpack there...

I don't see what the big deal is.