Posts by James Alvarez2

Look, if you've got 25 kids in a class and 20 of them are hitting sports, music lessons, or language classes, parents have to figure it out, right?
It’s totally doable. A friend of mine goes to a school where religion class is always just the first or last period. Since everyone isn't starting and ending at the exact same second every single day, it works... you just need better organization.

For sure, I agree regarding classes without religion, just like there are classes with one or two languages or after-school programs.
But you've got some kids who do religion but skip the after-school stuff, and vice versa. It all comes down to priorities.
And the priority should be the kid standing in the hallway during mandatory classes, not the convenience of 22 parents who CHOSE to sign their kid up for an ELECTIVE.

Millie's issue is most obvious at Sunday Mass. You see a bunch of Millies sitting there with their legs crossed, chewing gum, whispering, and laughing.

And that whole crowd of Millies only exists because they're signed up for religion class just so they don't have to sit in the hallway.

Lawrence Torres56 said:Are you actually raising your kid to just swallow everything anyone tells them and build their entire worldview on it? Or are you teaching them to listen to everything, process it, and then decide for themselves what fits their life and what they can just ignore?

Sorry, but if I'm being totally blunt, it feels pretty pointless to vent about what someone said and how our kids took it, especially when you immediately pivot to talking about diversity... because look, if we're teaching our kids at home that everyone is different and that every single person has inherent value regardless of what they believe in, then that kid isn't going to see "non-believers go to hell" or "pray before eating" as a personal attack; they'll just see it as someone else's way of life...
Which basically means the fault doesn't lie with the people saying those things—they're just living their truth and sharing their faith—it lies with us for being so inconsistent with the values we claim to teach our children.

Religious ed isn't mandatory in American schools; we all have the choice whether to enroll our kids or not, and that's where our diversity is respected. Trying to purge it from the system completely just undermines everything we say about embracing differences, and honestly, that says a lot more about us than it does about the people preaching about hell or pre-meal prayers.😉

@Karen Richardson3, please don't 😉,

So you're saying an atheist should sit their kid down before school starts and basically prep them for the fallout? Like, tell them, "Hey, someone might try to scare you with hellfire, but don't sweat it—we don't believe that crap, and everyone's different..." Just a heads-up so they don't get blindsided...

It’s like someone who doesn't eat pork telling you that you're messing up and you're gonna end up in some hellhole just because you're grabbing a different burger today...

It’s not even about the kids. The real issue is the adults—the teachers and professors—and how they choose to push their faith on them...

That's exactly the point you're making... religion classes should be elective, plain and simple. That's how they ought to be handled.
Why does this have to happen right in the middle of class? Seriously... Why can't they just do it before or after school? Or even during a different shift? Makes zero sense...

Both sides just need to get on the same page here. For the kids actually taking religion class, they deserve to be around other kids who are there because their parents actually want them to be—kids raised with those same values. It makes more sense. And on the flip side, the kids who aren't doing religion shouldn't have to wander the halls or sit stuck in some library just because they're "the ones without that class"... it's stupid...

I’m gonna be a little rude here, but what’s even the point of Millie from 2nd grade being in religion class if she’s only there to just show up...
She’s learning stuff at school that she never hears about at home. Doesn't go to church because her parents don't bother with it either. The Catholic curriculum in elementary school shouldn't be some massive mashup of every other religion just so they can claim "everyone knows a little bit about everything." She's being taught about this God, but at home, they tell her that's just not how it works. They say God couldn't have made the Earth in a few days, that He couldn't part the sea, or that it's totally unfair how the father was happy when the prodigal son came home... meanwhile, at home, they had a son who spent his entire life just bowing down to his old man. Now all she hears about is Heaven and Hell, like those are the only destinations based on whether you believe or not...
He’ll show up for communion, hit the confirmation, and skip every single Sunday service in between because why bother? Then he’ll just walk down that aisle and get married in a church anyway...
So Millie’s gonna send little Peter to religious ed too. Just because the neighbors are breathing down her neck about it... He’ll get all his sacraments done and whatever, but she isn't showing up to church with him. Her own old man never even bothered going with her...
The 2041 census shows both Millie and Peter declaring themselves believers. Why?

Religious studies as an elective? Sure, why not.
Let the kids who actually want to go attend, even if their parents happen to be believers. Great.
If it’s not their thing, they can opt out. They’ll have plenty of time to figure it all out in 10, 15, or 20 years when they start seeing things differently anyway.
Kids from religious families will have plenty of time to realize it’s not for them too.

How am I being "inconsistent" just because I tell my kid that faith is a personal choice? Just like how Peter chose to be an atheist, or how Anna's mom does yoga.
We all practice our own free choices during our own time.
I don't see hypocrisy or inconsistency here. I just see a parent explaining to their kid why it's cool for their buddy in class to be in the lesson straight through, instead of having some random period where everyone's just hanging out and causing trouble—which would just lead to complaints from the parents of the kids who *do* attend.

There's this beautiful Quote: Speak about Christ only when asked, but live in such a way that people ask you about Christ.
Swap "Christ" for "Faith" and you've got it.
That’s basically my guiding principle most of the time.

And that’s the whole basis for making religious studies an elective. People keep harping on about "forcing" religion out of schools.
As long as you, as a believer, raise your child in the faith and teach them how to treat their peers, then religious studies belongs in school. Your kid might say a prayer before a meal—quietly, to themselves. Maybe nobody notices, maybe a classmate asks why. Maybe when talking about "how I spent my winter break," they mention traditions from home or church. Maybe you show them a cool book or a board game. A kid can weave their faith into so many other parts of life that don't need to be labeled "Religion Class," whether it's third period on Tuesday morning or second period on Friday afternoon.

Totally agree with you.

That evolution thing wasn't an atheist trying to prove some religion teacher is an idiot.
In theology school, they hammer it into future teachers that the Bible isn't meant to explain the mechanics of how Earth and life actually formed—it’s about who created it, based on the religious principles taught there.

Look, I'm a believer. A practical one. I went to Sunday school and my kid will too, at least until they grow up and decide otherwise... if that even happens.
But I just don't get how anyone teaching any religion can look a kid in the eye and flat-out say all their non-believing friends are headed straight to hell. We could pull sections from the Catechism right now: 846, 847, 848 all talk about how no one is saved if they consciously reject God or turn away from Him.
Then you've got the 1996 version saying: Our justification comes from God's grace. Grace is favor, unmerited help that God gives us so we can respond to His call: to become children and daughters of God, heirs, participants in the divine nature and eternal life.
And then there's this: "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven." (Mt 7:21)
So we have all this deep stuff in the New Testament that theologians debate for years, yet it's somehow okay for a teacher to walk up to a seven-year-old and tell them their best friend sitting next to them in class is going to hell just because they aren't a believer?
That's what I'm talking about.
It doesn't sit right with me, and I don't want my kids having teachers like that.

I think we're on the same page—the way religious ed is handled in schools right now isn't what you or I would want for our own kids.

On top of all the logistical headaches for parents and the kids who don't attend, I have my own solid reasons for wanting religious ed out of the public school system... and it's specifically because my faith is so deeply personal and important to me.

Lawrence Torres56 said:As far as I'm concerned, I don't even need a trial period, because if my kid is actually interested in something, it's on me to handle the "trial" phase myself, right? It shouldn't be about making kids who already know what they want waste their time while my kid sits there overthinking whether they should sign up or not...
And for my little one, it wasn't about being forced at all; she knew exactly what she was getting into and embraced it just like she did with math, English, and everything else....

Besides, religious education isn't a mandatory subject in American schools anyway, right? Nobody is forcing you to enroll your kid in religion class in first grade. You could literally just ask the instructor if the kid could sit in for a few school hours just to see if they're into it, and if they decide to commit, they can officially start the following year...

There is zero chance you can show a kid at home what they'll be doing in sports, drama, language, or religion class. Not because I think you don't know how to grab a ball or play an English song, but because it depends entirely on who is teaching and how they teach.

Like, someone mentioned their kid was told non-believers go to hell or that they had to pray before meals. What?

That teacher should be teaching kids that we're all different. Just like some people play tennis, others take Chinese, and others take religion—some people pray, some kneel, some won't eat when the sun is out, some wear specific clothes...

Religion class should be about teaching that only God decides the final judgment, and it's not our job to tell anyone where they're going after they die.
The problem is just that not everyone does that.
I even know a guy who graduated from a major university and doesn't believe in evolution. He doesn't accept it as a valid theory at all. And that is definitely NOT what they teach at a major university.

That's why religious studies should be moved outside of schools, and then we can do a massive purge of the professors. Then maybe we can move forward.

Lawrence Torres56 said:Look, I don’t force my kid into anything, but I also refuse to let her just drift through life like some headless chicken wandering aimlessly around. If she sets her mind on something, she’s going to see it through to the bitter end before she’s even allowed to think about walking away. To me, this constant hopping from one hobby to the next, jumping from activity to activity without ever sticking the landing, is just a massive waste of time—honestly, I think it’s how you actually end up messing up your kid's head. You know the drill: today she doesn't want to go to Sunday School, tomorrow she’s over the after-school programs, the day after that she’s refusing to go to class... where does it stop? Where does that even lead us? Now, don't get me wrong, I’m not claiming to have all the answers or saying my way is the only way to raise a human being, but here in the States, this approach really works for us. It’s what we’ve always done since day one, and we’ve never run into a single issue with it. Then I look at my friend's situation, and man, it's a different world. Her house is basically a warehouse filled with soccer jerseys, gymnastics gear, art kits, and every gadget imaginable, yet the kid loses interest in everything after maybe three days. He's only in second grade and he's already acting like school is beneath him because nothing catches his interest anymore; he’s practically begging to stay home every Friday for a long weekend. It’s just wild to watch.

I don't know about you guys, but I’ve been sitting here staring at my screen for what feels like an eternity, just trying to make sense of everything being thrown our way lately. Is it just me, or does it feel like we're all just collectively spinning our wheels while the world moves at a hundred miles an hour? Honestly, I can't tell if I'm just overthinking things or if there's actually some kind of pattern emerging here that everyone else is somehow missing. Does anyone else get that weird, nagging feeling that we're all just reacting to the chaos instead of actually navigating it? It's exhausting, really. I mean, how are we even supposed to stay grounded when the ground itself feels like it's constantly shifting under our feet? I'm just curious if anyone else is feeling this specific brand of existential burnout, or if I should just go grab a massive coffee and pretend everything is totally fine. kaže:
Not really, though. If you actually look at what they teach in Church, it’s basically the exact opposite, and from a strictly theological standpoint, the whole idea that non-believers are headed for hell definitely holds water. But honestly, whatever... my daughter just thinks the whole thing is hilarious anyway. 😉

I mean, honestly, isn't it obvious that every single religion out there is supposed to be teaching kids how to actually respect one another? It’s right there in the core of it, isn't it? But then you have these total weirdos—these absolute creeps—who spend all their time scaring people by dragging up some twisted, evil version of God just to threaten them with hellfire. Like, seriously, why would anyone even go there?😉

But the kid didn't get a trial run of Sunday school. They could've had a trial practice. Could've had five trial practices before you went out and bought all the gear.

Basically, you asked a 6 or 7-year-old if they wanted to learn about something totally abstract (even if you're a believer living by the teachings of the Church, your kid can't wrap their head around that yet) and then you drag them for eight—not even YEARS, but eight—to do something they don't like, if they don't like it.

I get the idea that you can't try everything and quit after two tries. But religious education is a super sensitive topic for that kind of logic.

rowdypanther12 said:Why don't posts have a like button? 😢

They have it on Tapatalk! 😬

Alright, fine, whatever, but why is there no option to just quit?
Like, you aren't allowed to just walk away from basketball if you realize you're actually more into tennis?

It’s not even the same thing.
Religious studies is an elective from the jump.
Just like computer science, English, or ethics class.

Kids know damn well the difference between "you have to" and "you can." And honestly, I don't think we're teaching them anything wrong if they give something a shot and realize it's not their thing. Doesn't mean they're gonna be switching things up every single week...

Lawrence Torres56 said:I mean, sorry, but if that's the case, then most of the priests who refuse to let kids take communion because they missed the 9 AM Sunday service must be out of their minds too, right?😉

I mean, yeah, I totally agree—being a true believer isn't about being at church 24/7, but it seems like most priests nowadays don't see it that way.

Of course, I'm just talking about my own local parish here...

Yeah, any priest doing that has clearly lost their damn mind. We're all on the same page here...
Kids have other stuff going on. Sure, it’d be easy if they could all just roll up for the 9:00 AM service, but some of them have games every single week at that exact time... especially when school sports and club leagues overlap. Some families also visit grandparents, go home, or head to a hospital or nursing home—doesn't matter. Plus, some parents just can't make the morning mass work...
Look, you just go talk to the priest. Sit him down, explain what happened... that's what they're there for. Besides, there are services running all Sunday long, so missing one doesn't mean you've blown your shot at the next one...
If the priest can't or won't get it, and the parent or kid still wants to go to Mass, then you just find somewhere else...

Rules are one thing, but pure fiction is another...

Back before my First Communion, we used to run around collecting stamps at different churches... mostly just our local parish, but enough that I actually knew the priest and the youth leader. Every time I’d show up somewhere new just to hunt down a stamp, they were always super welcoming and gave me props for it...

If a priest only sees his flock as people who show up for Mass every single day, he’s got zero clue about the faith he’s actually preaching... total disconnect.
My old priest used to say you only need to show up at church once a week. That’s it. Everything else? That’s just living. Being part of the community... visiting your grandma at the nursing home, helping a neighbor carry groceries up the stairs, actually paying attention to kids on the bus, playing with the little ones, or just talking to your husband... that's where the real stuff happens...

Lawrence Torres56 said:I’m starting to fear that the actual foundations of faith don't even exist anymore; everything just seems to shift depending on which priest you happen to be dealing with at the moment.😁....

Kids get baptized basically because their parents want them to, and first communion at that age is pretty much driven by parental willpower too, so why should we even bother pushing these rituals on them?....I don't know, but in my book, wouldn't it be way more effective to actually try and make the faith relatable to kids during those years? Because otherwise, none of this stuff is going to matter unless it becomes their own personal choice later on...
Take my little girl, for example—she won't head to church on her own since it’s not exactly a walk in the park to get there, and look, I’m not exactly a devout regular who's sitting in a pew every single day... does that really mean the church automatically brands her an unbeliever based on my lifestyle and shuts the door on her ever finding her way to faith, even if she’s actually super interested in it herself?
Besides, isn't that whole setup kind of a massive contradiction to what the church actually preaches?

Being a believer doesn't mean you're glued to a church bench every single day. There's no rule saying you have to hit mass daily. It mentions honoring the Lordly day. That's Sunday. If you can't make it Sunday, go during the week. Shorter service. Or just wait until next week.

If someone is labeling your kid an unbeliever just because you aren't constantly at church (which is honestly ridiculous), then that person isn't playing with a full deck.

Lawrence Torres56 said:.
I mean, look, church religion is all about evaluation, right? Like, if you don't know the specific verses or you skip communion or confirmation, you're basically out in the cold—kind of like how you can't get into certain clubs unless you've got enough social clout for those Sunday services...😉 whereas what they teach in public school is more about the basics of faith mixed with just being a decent human being. In elementary school, nobody is going to fail you just because you haven't memorized a prayer yet, but trust me, you'll get flagged in a heartbeat if you start acting like a jerk or swearing in class.
Quinn:

I've been thinking about this more and more lately, and honestly? Religious ed stays in the school system only because there are parents who choose to send their kids there. It's not because the system itself is actually good. I find myself feeling way more frustrated with other parents than I do with the Vatican agreements, the teachers, the school boards, or the government agencies.

In my book, having religion in the school curriculum should be about introducing kids to spiritual concepts and teaching them how to treat the people around them with basic respect... and honestly, I wouldn't even mind if they touched on a bit of different faiths too.
But church-based religion? That's almost exclusively about rote memorization of prayers and songs just to make sure the congregants look "devout" while they're inside the building, without any of it actually carrying over once they walk out the doors.
I signed my little girl up for the school program, even though I'm still undecided about whether she'll attend the church sessions... First Communion and Confirmation aren't really my priority, especially since I've seen how much kids get pressured and bullied through faith in those settings.

Oh, yeah, but usually only leading up to big holidays like Easter or Christmas, or during those kid-focused blessings... Though, let's be real, it's pretty much the same as a regular service, except the priests smile at the kids a little more. Although, in some parishes, they just call the standard Sunday services "children's Mass" when all the kids getting their first communion or confirmation are required to show up just to collect their little trinkets and rewards...😁

That just means the parish is disorganized and can't come up with anything actually different for the kids. It falls on the pastor, the chaplain, and the teachers teaching religion at the church or local schools.

As long as a kids' mass looks identical to an adult mass, you can't even say there's such a thing as a mass for children.

Then again, someone who doesn't go to church wouldn't be able to tell the difference anyway. You can't just cut parts out of a mass. You can shorten things or present them differently, but that's it.

Susan James said:So, I think that's perfectly reasonable.
If you don't even understand the core tenets of your own faith, how can you meaningfully participate in the sacraments?
It's just being honest about it.

(Though, I do worry that some people might receive them regardless of their knowledge, simply because the parish wants to keep their numbers up.)😢

Yeah, unfortunately, that's a huge reason and one of the things that really pisses me off.

I had a priest once where you couldn't go to First Communion unless you were attending Mass (didn't have to be a kids' mass, didn't even have to be in our parish, didn't even have to be on a Sunday—but it HAD to be Mass). And you couldn't do Confirmation if you showed up in a dress that was too short or too revealing, or in heels you couldn't even walk in.

But saying "I'm doing this so I don't have to deal with it when I get married" is just hypocritical.
Why get married in a church at all if you don't want to? If the sacrament doesn't mean anything to you?
It's more expensive, there are rules, and it's more work.

Most big churches have specific services just for kids.
In our local parishes, it’s shorter, the sermon is geared toward them, and the music is way more kid-friendly—lots of songs about mom, dad, siblings, and teachers...
There’s usually even someone there specifically to guide them through the motions, telling them when to stand, sit, pray, or which part of the song to repeat...

I’m with Summer on this one. I wouldn't say they find Mass boring if they’re already used to going regularly.

But I totally get why it feels dull for kids who don't experience that at home.

And I’m not even gonna go there regarding that "you won't have to do this once you're married" nonsense. That logic is so twisted it's borderline abusive.

A little friend of mine has a kid starting first grade at a school where religion class is the very last period. That way, kids who don't take it just head home, so there isn't a bunch of kids loitering in the halls.

Whatever, still got over 20 kids signed up for religion class.
And honestly, what really gets me is when you sign your kid up for religious ed, they make it all the way to third grade, and then suddenly there's all this drama because the kid actually has to go to church on Sunday. 🤣
But it’s not like it’s a big deal when a kid plays sports and has to deal with conditioning and games every single Saturday and Sunday. 🤣

So I show up to pick my kid up from school, and I get stuck listening to this group of parents—who don't even know me, and our kids don't know each other—venting about how "exhausting" it is to go to Mass every Sunday. They want their kid to take First Communion, but they sure don't want them actually going to Mass.
What's the point? Why bother with religious ed and stressing the kid out with extra classes, services, and prep work if you aren't actually committed to it? 🤷

rowdypanther12 said:Yeah, we thought it was hilarious at first too. Honestly, our friends are still making jokes about it 😂
but then you realize it’s actually not funny at all. In a more paranoid country, you could end up in serious trouble for something like this

I never even thought it would be funny in the long run.
And I have no clue how I'd react if someone said that to me while I was in a position like a teacher.
Terrifying.

Man 😂
I'm actually dying laughing here 🤣
Dad's touching her 🤣

Pretty sure that was the whole point of that Quote 😬

I think this quote is killer 👍
It’s basically a perfect description of this kid I’m working with on her reading and writing this week.

I have zero clue how anyone could interpret that as being about paying insurance premiums or signing up at the local library.

Nathan Gomez8 said:Ladies, what have your experiences been like with King's Bakery?

From Columbus?

Grabbed some cakes and pastries there a few times. They're solid.
The cakes look great and the sponge wasn't dry. Dry cake is usually my biggest pet peeve...

The cake was freaking amazing!!
So glad you loved it and that the desserts were a hit for your crew 😍

I was at this wedding at the Plaza where they had a killer dessert station. All the little treats were served on ice sculptures and they were seriously gourmet.

(and I swear even in the dead of winter those ballrooms are sweltering, doesn't matter what the weather is like outside)

I hate it when there’s no dessert sitting right on the table at a wedding😬

Man, I am actually stoked for this! Got a wedding coming up soon where they’re doing full cakes and dessert spreads, and honestly, it’s been way too long since I’ve been to a wedding where the cake wasn't total garbage 👋