Posts by brighttiger41

placidjackal36 said:brighttiger41, she’s only doing it because she loves you.

Honestly, if you were tossed back into her prime for just a month, you’d come back ready to eat the damn table and the plates too.
So don't take it personally.

Unless, of course, she starts force-feeding you against your will... in that case, call 911. 🤣

And what am I going to do? Because I love you, am I supposed to make you play darts all day just because it's good for your shoulder posture? 🤷

Man, if I tell you nineteen times "don't do it," then for God's sake, don't do it. What kind of "love" is that, seriously?

Jason Ortiz5 said:Do you know my father-in-law? 😁

Haha, whenever people start bringing up alcohol around me, I just tell them I’m on antibiotics—if they’re being particularly pushy, that is. 🤣

Robin Diaz4 said:My absolute favorite conversation at my aunt's house:
Me: "No thanks, I don't eat meat."
Aunt: "But this is veal!" 😂
And just like that, I learned that veal somehow doesn't count as meat... 😁

Aahahahahahaa 🤣 🤣

rustydrifter2 said:Oh, man. Food!
There’s definitely truth to what everyone has said so far, but sometimes it crosses the line from being a social staple into actual pathology. Let me give you an example.
In my family, food was always the center of gravity for every get-together, conversation, or hangout. My parents loved hosting people; those lunches and dinners would basically revolve around my mom constantly juggling pans on the stove and plates on the table, while my dad kept heading back to the pantry for more cheese, deli meats, sausages, and whatnot. We’d sit down for dinner at, say, 3:00 PM, but out of the 30 minutes we actually spent sitting together, 25 of them were wasted just hovering over plates and pushing food onto people's forks. And then they’d claim they had such a lovely time socializing.
They expected that same level of service when we went to their house, too.
As for raising kids, food was always used as a substitute for actual emotions. If you were sad, scared, or needed encouragement, comfort, affection, understanding, or advice—the response was always: "Just eat something, it’ll make you feel better!" They’d sweep problems under the rug and put a plate of casserole on the table instead.
I didn't fall for it. I was never a big eater; lunch feels more like a chore I have to check off my list every day. It drives my mother crazy to this day. At 5'7" and about 130 lbs, I'm pretty thin. Once, she watched some documentary on anorexia on TV, and it absolutely floored her because she finally thought she had a medical name for my "condition." She nagged me about it for years. Of course, it never occurred to her to actually take me to a doctor if she was so worried; instead, her solution was to try and fix everything by setting the table sixteen times a day.
My brother is a completely different story. In his early thirties, he was 50 pounds overweight, dealing with high blood pressure, blood sugar issues, high cholesterol, and joint pain—everything hurts! He only recently started getting active; he’s taken up hiking, and his girlfriend has been helping him watch what he eats. He says that since he started living with her, he finally feels like a human being rather than just a sack of potatoes.
My parents, naturally, are both overweight. My mom is about 5'5" and 175 lbs. She is dead certain that salt is the one thing making us gain weight. She cooks "healthy," avoiding salt, but it doesn't matter when she’s loading everything with butter and heavy cream. And they can't get enough sweets; there are chocolates strategically placed everywhere. The best part is how she lectures me about salt being a deadly poison while simultaneously shoving a seventh piece of cake into her mouth.
The result of all this is our relationship today. I visit them maybe once every ten days; anything more than that is too much. Our conversations almost always devolve into them criticizing and fussing over me. It gets under my skin like nothing else. I love them, but we were never close, and we never will be. It's sad, but I avoid them because it's exhausting. Honestly, they avoid talking to me about anything meaningful, too; they never had the capacity for it. They treated my brother and me like objects that just needed to be fed and dressed warmly to ensure our basic needs were met. Feelings, opinions, preferences—we weren't allowed to have any of those.
My brother and I ended up at two opposite extremes. He accepted food as a replacement for human connection, whereas I developed an aversion to it. For me, eating feels like a heavy task; I’d honestly love it if scientists invented a single daily pill so I could stop worrying about it. I don't enjoy eating; there are a few things I like, but generally, food doesn't interest me at all. He finds it very hard to trust people, while I am hysterically open with everyone.
Etc, etc.
The point is, neither my brother nor I have a healthy relationship with food, and it’s a direct consequence of my parents' obsession with it.

That really does sound like a pathology, doesn't it? 😲

How on earth did you even endure that? Honestly, if it were me, I think I would have kicked them out of the house long ago! 😬

silvercobra68 said:Humans are actually quite limited creatures. We function best when following set patterns. For instance, a grandmother or mother is primarily raised to be a caregiver, so her subconscious tells her to ensure her offspring is well-fed. On the flip side, a grandfather or father is raised to be a provider, making his subconscious focus on whether the guests have enough to eat.

And from there, you get this intense social conditioning. The issue is that we take all of this for granted. Nobody actually stops to think—wait a second, is our guest eating this roast turkey because they love it, or does it give them acid reflux? Or maybe they just aren't hungry, or there’s some other completely mundane reason. Americans (and honestly, it’s not just an American thing, though it's very pronounced here in the States) always assume a guest is turning down food out of shyness. Think about that paradox: because you were taught to be a good host, you were also taught to be modest, unobtrusive, and temperate. So, you feel embarrassed to overindulge at someone's house—even though you’d actually prefer to pig out—but you're too ashamed. Meanwhile, your host would actually be happiest if you ate like a hog. That’s the paradox. Then there’s that famous Bon-Ton. Bon-Ton, or whatever you want to call it, is just a total load of nonsense that serves absolutely no one. Who benefits from Bon-Ton? Nobody living. It forces people to act according to certain patterns, but those patterns mostly just cause discomfort.

Bon-Ton is like a Victorian corset—uncomfortable as hell—but if a woman wasn't wearing one, she was considered unattractive and would never get married (speaking of the old days). What a joke. Not to mention the health issues. But let's bring it back to the present.

Say you're sitting at the table and the host serves you something that gives you terrible gas. What are you going to do? Just suffer through it! You'll deal with bloating and cramps, and then you'll end up having an accident once you finally get home. On top of that, you'll be irritable because you're in pain, so you'll end up snapping at your wife for no reason at all. Instead of just letting it rip right there at the table as soon as you feel bloated, you should just ask the host to crack a window and call it a day. Same goes for burping—just burp properly instead of risking stomach pains. And don't even get me started on how licking your plate is actually a noble thing to do. Aside from not wasting food, you're doing a huge favor for whoever has to do the dishes, which is usually the host's wife. But to make the paradox even bigger, if you actually licked your plate, she’d be the most offended person in the room and would gossip about you to her friends for months. "Can you believe that hillbilly is licking his plates?"—"Can you imagine!"

So, I wrote this little bit to show you the sheer stupidity of the society we live in and the social norms we are slaves to.

Man, I actually posted this dream on my Facebook status lol.

I tweaked it a little bit to avoid any copyright issues, but that's about it. 🤣🤣

Kudos to you. 🙏

Kate Phillips7 said:Given which subforum this is in, I'm assuming you're interested in the psychological aspect, just like you mentioned. Like why women tend to act this way while men don't. Plus, it’s clearly getting under your skin, which fits perfectly with the personality you described. Am I wrong?

Well, sure, men probably do it too, but let's be real—the ratio of women to men doing this is probably closer to 98:2.

It’s irritating for everyone, isn't it? Can't you see that? It certainly is for me, at least. Like I said, I just can't stand having to say the exact same thing twice to someone. 😉

Kate Phillips7 said:There's never any offense taken, just keep them coming.😉

Don't you worry for a second—we aren't going to let you down. 😉

Did you actually grasp why this thread was opened in the first place, or do I really need to sit down and walk you through it? 😕

Either you just don't care, or you're being completely dishonest—because that comment of yours? It’s hard to believe. 🤷

Kate Phillips7 said:No offense, but I don't really get why you felt the need to start a thread about this. It’s not a bad thing, and honestly, I don't see it as some big deal. Women have always been there for men; I guess if that’s all you saw growing up with your grandma or your mom, then that's just how it is. I also don't understand why it gets under your skin so much—maybe you're just having one of those off days?

Look, no disrespect, but please go back and read the original post one more time. 😉

Feel free to comb through my other comments on this topic if you need to. ☕

wearycobra252 said:Man, I actually have the exact opposite issue...

My mom is constantly breathing down my neck asking, "Why don't you have more stuff yet?!" 🤣

If that works for you, then honestly, there isn't a better 😁

Thomas Garcia71 said:haha, I’ve been in that exact same spot... then my grandma just grabbed a lamb shank and started gnawing on it like it was her last meal on earth...🤣....

Joshua Rogers11 said:Even now, whenever my mom calls me, she immediately starts checking in on whether I’ve eaten, if I'm staying on track with my diet, or if I'm taking care of myself... back when I was still living at home, it was just an endless loop of "eat this, eat that, you have to eat, please just eat, I won't—noooo, I really don't want to eat!" 😵

It hasn't changed one bit, even when I go visit my parents; it’s always the exact same routine. Honestly, I've just reached a point where I stopped asking myself why they act this way.
The second I walk through their front door, I just tell them straight up that I'm not hungry. 🙂

Thomas Hernandez16 said:My old man is constantly offering me food, only to turn around ten minutes later and tell me I need to watch my weight because I'm getting chubby. Then, when my kids eat dinner around 6 or 7 PM instead of stuffing their faces right before bed at 9, he loses his mind. "They haven't eaten! They're starving! Give them something to eat!" blah blah blah.
It's pure post-traumatic stress from back when everyone was struggling—he basically inherited it from his mother.
Back then, you were considered lucky and rich just as long as you weren't hungry.
When I tried going on a diet once, everyone acted like I was signing my own death warrant. "You're finished! You're gonna die!" they all said.

Peter Richardson6 said:This is such a great question. It happens to me all the time. I'll say "no thank you," and they'll be like, "Oh, come on, just have a little bite," and I'll say "no" again, and we go in circles for ages. My favorite part is when, after I've refused five times, they hit me with the "don't be shy!" Like, seriously? You shouldn't have to repeat yourself five times just to avoid a snack.🙂

Kevin Flores2 said:I totally get it. My skin crawled just reading your description. 😍 I've actually started skipping those kinds of gatherings altogether; I've officially become the black sheep of the family because of it. 😳

Honestly, every single older woman I've met fits this mold. My own mother used to drive me absolutely crazy with this exact thing throughout my entire childhood. But it wasn't even about whether I was actually hungry or not—it was just that nothing I did was ever enough for her. It never was. 😱

Lisa Lopez6 said:Ugh, tell me about it. I’ve been feeling the exact same way for ages... honestly, the way she constantly tries to push her little opinions on everyone just gets under my skin. It’s so grating! 🤦
She’s basically a carbon copy of her aunt, who—let’s be real—is a billion times more exhausting than she is.

northernbadger4 said:I get that they care, but when you tell them a million times you don't want anything... I mean, who do they think they are? -_- It's the same deal with my grandma, and honestly, it drives me insane. Weirdly enough, my other late grandmother never did this. This one asks me if I want to eat basically every five minutes. Like, give it a rest...

I agree with you; people definitely take food for granted. Still, it’s an interesting observation that this seems mostly driven by women rather than men. It points to some kind of issue in the female psychology, though I'm not sure how to label it. Regardless, it isn't normal for someone to ask the same question all day long and fail to grasp that you aren't hungry, even after being told a hundred times. It's not quite right. And it mostly happens with women, at least most of the time.

Same here. My old lady drives me crazy with those mindless questions. Every time she calls my cell—since she's traveling abroad sometimes—she always asks if I've eaten... such a pointless question. No, I haven't eaten, I decided to go on a hunger strike and just starve to death because I'm curious to see how it goes -_-

I hope nobody takes my comment the wrong way or sees it as chauvinistic. If anyone did, I apologize; that wasn't the intent. I was just pointing out certain observations. I hope no one is offended; I'm not a bigot or anything like that, as I respect everyone regardless of gender, religion, or race. 🙂

How much are we all actually living through right now? Really? Is anyone else feeling the sheer weight of it all? 🤣

I think I’ll head out and take care of some errands. 🙂

🤣🤣🤣

slywolf45 said:Fine, but I'm certainly not going to start a whole thread about mosquitoes.
It's pretty obvious you care significantly more about Grandma than some bug.
So, let's hear a story better than anything on Oprah:😍

(if there truly are no consequences, then this entire discussion is futile)

That would be fair too.

You're right, dear, but you can't exactly tell a mosquito to stop, can you? You have to swat it, otherwise, it'll just keep coming back and buzzing in your ear 😁 (and honestly, there are plenty of people like that these days 😲), and Grandma really ought to understand when she's been told once, maybe twice—because at the end of the day, she's a human being with, I assume, relatively sound cognitive structures 😍

And my own experience? It has consequences. They might seem minor, but they exist!! Or perhaps they aren't even minor 😁

Avoiding those types of people altogether, or just feeling that constant spike of anxiety whenever you have to communicate or make contact with them 🤣

slywolf45 said:Fair enough, she was being a bit tedious about it.
Do you think all that actually left any lasting psychological scars?
I mean, we are in the psychology sub, after all, aren't we?🤷

Look, honey, it’s not about lasting trauma; it’s just pure irritation. A mosquito doesn't leave you with deep psychological scars, does it? It just annoys the hell out of you—especially when it's buzzing right by your ear right before you drift off to sleep, don't you agree? 😁

We're just dissecting why things turned out this way, and besides, you said it yourself... it was just boring. 🙂

slywolf45 said:Sarcasm is practically our best friend at this point. 🙂

And that’s easily the best 👍

slywolf45 said:That sounds brutal.😢

I have to hand it to you, though.☕

Okay, I haven't quite reached that level of desperation yet (good grief, am I being serious right now? 😕), but usually, things settle down after I've made it very clear that my limit has been reached.
Anyone else here dealing with elderly relatives, or is it just me? 🤷

If you can pull it off, then it’s a win.😉

briskpuma23 said:It looks like you still have your grandparents around, so you can afford to be this reckless. You’ll regret it eventually, but by then, it’ll be too late...

Thank God my grandmother doesn't do that to me. I’ve lost count of how many times—fourteen times now!—I’ve had to sit her down and explain that I will ask when I want something, and that I really don't need her constantly offering me things. Honestly, why is it so hard to understand? ☕

slywolf45 said:So, how exactly did you survive that absolute nightmare?
Give us the details.

It’s happened more than once. Honestly, it happens all the time. One time, I say no. Another time? I say no again. But then comes that third time—that moment when they start venting, acting like they're carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders, and suddenly... what am I supposed to do? How can I just stay silent? I end up pivoting. I shift the conversation entirely, just to get away from that heavy energy. It's the only way. 🤣

briskpuma23 said:Man, I don't know how you guys deal with it. Being bribed with food? How do you even survive that kind of psychological warfare?

We haven't seen any threads like this on this sub before.

Look, there is a massive difference between wanting to do something kind for someone and just being needlessly pedantic. So, what is it? Do you genuinely fail to grasp the point of this discussion, or are you just pretending you don't? 🤷

Joshua Rogers11 said:Even now, whenever my mom calls me, she immediately starts checking in on whether I’ve eaten, if I'm staying on track with my diet, or if I'm taking care of myself... back when I was still living at home, it was just an endless loop of "eat this, eat that, you have to eat, please just eat, I won't—noooo, I really don't want to eat!" 😵

It hasn't changed one bit, even when I go visit my parents; it’s always the exact same routine. Honestly, I've just reached a point where I stopped asking myself why they act this way.
The second I walk through their front door, I just tell them straight up that I'm not hungry. 🙂

Good grief, someone really needs to conduct a serious sociological study on why this is strictly a female phenomenon. Why don't men do this? Take me, for example—not once in my life has a man or a grandfather ever tried to force food down my throat. Sure, they might ask if I want a drink or offer me something, but if I say no, they move on. But this? This relentless obsession with feeding people? It's absolutely wild. 🤣

bannned said:I guess they all picture us as these skinny little three-drawer filing cabinets... no matter how we actually look, we're always portrayed as scrawny and pathetic...🤷

Hahaha 😁

Thank God I’m sitting at 6'2" and 210 lbs, but honestly, just don't try to tell me what to do. If I say I can't or won't do something, then that's the end of it—yet people still keep pushing and nagging an hour later, for crying out loud.😕

Thomas Garcia71 said:haha, I’ve been in that exact same spot... then my grandma just grabbed a lamb shank and started gnawing on it like it was her last meal on earth...🤣....

Hahahaha, how long did it take her to finally get moving? 😁

Alright, let's kick this off with a classic: "Chuck Norris once convinced his grandma that he wasn't actually hungry!"
With that, I’m officially opening this thread.
Honestly, I’ve found myself in this exact position more times than I can count—where a grandma (mine or anyone else's, doesn't matter) just won't stop badgering me to eat. I’ll say no, clearly stating that I'm full, and then she’ll ask me forty-five more times! She just keeps insisting!! Seriously, why is it that most grandmas act like this? (And honestly, why isn't it grandpas too? 🤔)!

Personally, I tend to get pretty irritated when someone tries to push me into something after I've already said no. I'm as stubborn as a mule; once I make up my mind, that's it. It's settled!

Can someone please explain this phenomenon? 👎

rapidgull3 said:What’s the deal with that news about a clinic opening up in the States to treat homosexuality?

Hahaha, yeah right... they won't get very far with that one. I think even a geologist would have a hard time finding any logic in their treatment plan!🤣>

Alright, here are a few older ones I dug up 🙂

First

Second

Third

Fourth

Newer one 😁

Fifth

And one more oldie 😁

7,
8,
9 😉