Posts by redviper17

Is it just me, or is there nothing more soul-crushing than watching a game that feels like a guaranteed win slowly slip through your fingers? I was sitting on my couch yesterday, feeling pretty confident, thinking we had this one in the bag. Then, suddenly, the momentum just... evaporates.

It’s that specific kind of frustration where you start questioning everything. You look at the bullpen, you look at the lineup, and you just wonder how a massive lead can vanish in what feels like the blink of an eye. One minute you're celebrating, and the next, you're staring at a screen in total disbelief while the other side is celebrating on your turf.

It’s honestly exhausting to follow a team that struggles to close things out like this. It makes the highs feel hollow because you’re always waiting for the inevitable collapse. Do you guys think it's more about individual mistakes in the late innings, or is it just a fundamental issue with how the squad handles pressure?

hiddenscout362 said:Well, look, I got married without being pregnant, and let me tell you, it didn't go well at all. When I told people at work I was getting married in September—it was January at the time—they immediately hit me with: "Oh, are you expecting?" As if, if I were actually pregnant, there's no way I would have waited eight months just to tie the knot. 🤣

After six months of marriage passed without a pregnancy, they started asking, "So, what are you waiting for?"
Once we hit the one-year mark, the gossip started: "Poor things, they're probably going to have issues."
By the second year, people were literally inventing diagnoses for us and shoving unsolicited advice on how to conceive down our throats.

Then, when I finally did get pregnant after two and a half years of marriage, suddenly everyone’s tone changed to: "Aww, poor things, I feel so bad for them, they had such a hard time."🤣

🤣My experience was almost exactly the same! We got engaged over a year ahead of time, and people still had the nerve to ask if I was pregnant. I mean, good grief, how could I be pregnant when the wedding isn't for another 14 months?! It would have had to happen way earlier than that, right? WTF!?
And then the ridiculous questions just kept coming;
During our first year of marriage: "What are you waiting for? Is there something wrong with you? Are you guys even trying?"
About a year and a half in: "Are you guys having issues?"
By the second year of marriage, once I finally got pregnant, the questions shifted to, "When is your husband's brother going to have a baby???" Seriously? Wtf? 🙂 Why should I care about his timeline? When he makes one, he makes one! 🙂

Zachary White9 said:I had a total disaster with a tenor I hired for a church service once. He was just awful—super forced and amateurish. He ended up charging me $100, even though our initial agreement was somewhere between $200 and $100 depending on how many songs were played (plus he was playing the organ). Honestly, asking for that much right before the service started felt like such a rip-off! My husband and his buddies were just finishing up a game at his place and were supposed to swing by to pick me up—thank goodness his dad was there to lend him some cash so we weren't stuck!

Honestly, that is just predatory. People who pull stunts like that on newlyweds know exactly what they're doing. They know you’re likely to get ripped off right before or after the big day because, let's face it, you're basically losing your mind from the stress! You aren't exactly in a state to think rationally in that moment...
And once the dust settles a week or two later and you realize you've been taken advantage of, what can you even do? Nobody ever gives the money back, and half the time, those people won't even pick up the phone when you call them! 👎

Jack Murphy7 said:I got married about a year and a half ago. My wife was happy with the American cakes, though she did mention they were pricey. Honestly, I think you pay the most when you aren't satisfied
I see the criticism is starting to pile up on the forum. Let them talk... hopefully, nobody turns that scrutiny on us

As for me, I've always been thrilled with the flavor of the cakes and pastries—my guests have been too! My only real gripe is with how they handle their business operations.🤷

Larry Ross43 said:It’s not your problem if she already paid someone else... you gotta take risks in business, I guess... It's good you posted this warning, but personally, I wouldn't have paid her a dime!

Honestly, I’ve learned the most valuable lessons on this forum when people shared these kinds of warnings—usually because they had a bad experience at an event. Those posts are pure gold because they come from real-world experience. Thanks to this community, I knew exactly how to handle myself when dealing with the cameraman, the photographer, and even the venue manager!🤷
Ms. Brenda from The American Cookie was always constantly criticizing Ivan from Bolero, yet he handled everything we agreed upon perfectly and professionally. From the strong cocktails to the extra menu items and even the vegetarian options, he delivered everything exactly as promised—totally professional and spot on!👍

Larry Ross43 said:Don't take this the wrong way, but you're crazy if you actually paid that amount...!
And her son is just standing right there? Come on... where was your husband?? He should've just stuffed all those pastries down his throat!
Why'd you even pay if you weren't happy with it...

We had already paid half upfront, like a deposit... My husband was right there with me, and we made it very clear that we weren't satisfied. But she just kept playing the victim, saying how sorry she was and how hard things were for her. She even claimed my cakes arrived late, so she had to pay another woman to pack everything up on Saturday morning, and then suggested she could just refund us later $33 😳.... Maybe we shouldn't have handed over the cash, but I've officially cut ties with her and told her straight to her face that I wouldn't recommend her to anyone! I'm only sharing this so you ladies know to always get a firm price upfront, rather than having someone give you an estimate like $2000 and then hitting you with a much higher bill at the end!
Since our party went so smoothly and was otherwise well-organized, this was really our only complaint. Plus, the cookies and the cake were delicious, so I decided to let it go... 🤷

Here’s a little heads-up from my side: ladies, please be extremely careful when you're booking a vendor for an American cake service. Don't get me wrong, the cakes and pastries themselves are delicious, but that woman absolutely wrecked me... I picked out a specific dessert display a whole year in advance, only for her to show up on my wedding day with something completely different! My husband and I were totally losing our minds when we saw what was being served in the hall. I even went as far as bringing her a photo of myself in my wedding dress just so she could see the colors—it was white with pink accents—and I explicitly told her, "I want white cakes with pink decorative details." Then, she calls me just three days before the reception claiming she had a "vision," saying she knew something else would look better with the dress. I figured, okay, fine, thinking she meant the table decor, but then she serves us these huge, greasy purple things and a completely different display! And wouldn't you know it, she charged me more for the cake than originally agreed $167! 😠 On top of all that, she actually billed me extra for packaging the treats for an hour or two; she charged me $200!!! That's something that should honestly be included in the price of sweets that are already $30/kg!!!
So, just a word of caution regarding Bridget. She acts incredibly sweet to your face, but then she screws you over and plays dumb, acting shocked by the situation while charging you for everything. To make matters worse, her son just stands right there next to her defending her every move!

Jeffrey Fisher73 said:You might want to look into The Park Hotel near Miami Beach as well. They have a lovely garden area, and there's indoor space if the weather doesn't cooperate...

Honestly, I was just about to suggest GRASU and The Park Hotel myself...
It’s true that running small catering orders isn't always a goldmine for restaurant owners, but when you're talking about a group of 30 to 40 people, isn't that basically just a large dinner party? I don't see why that would be an issue at all, right? 🤷

Matthew Morales17 said:Bravo, you hit the nail right on the head! Honestly, several women in this group (without naming names!) have basically turned their parents into absolute saints, even though they were beaten as kids. And of course, it was always under the guise of being "for their own good," right?! It was always some perfectly deserved punishment, blah, blah, blah. There's actually a psychoanalyst who refers to this phenomenon as "parental totemization." If your parents act that way, it's much easier to just take all the blame onto yourself—to carry all the guilt—while giving God a total pass on everything they did wrong. Why would anyone do that? Because wouldn't it be just too incredibly painful to accept the reality that someone who is supposed to be your... well, let me go find that specific term and type it out for you so I don't have to struggle through it! ☕

I'm telling you, it really *was* for my own good! And honestly, it isn't some weird psychological thing. I remember every single time it happened because it didn't happen often, and looking back, I feel like those lessons were earned—they definitely stuck with me for life...🤷 I don't carry any trauma from it, and I call my parents my Gods because, aside from those disciplinary moments, they truly earned it through their love, kindness, integrity, and character!

Morgan Cooper34 said:Oh, and I nearly forgot this part.

There is a massive difference between psychological or verbal abuse—we're talking about the daily grind of crushing a child's spirit, systematically dismantling their sense of self and integrity—and just offering some justified criticism when they actually mess up. You know, using critique as a legitimate tool for guidance.

It’s the same deal with physical stuff. There is a world of difference between outright physical abuse—beating a kid just to vent or to break their will—and using corporal punishment as a last resort when nothing else seems to work.

In both cases of true abuse, you end up with traumatized children who never felt truly loved by their parents. But in the second scenario—with occasional criticism or discipline—if the child still feels that underlying parental love even after being corrected, there isn't any chance of them becoming traumatized.

AMEN! 🙏

Matthew Morales17 said:I think this is a really powerful point, but can we look closer? If someone hits me, I can usually point to a reason, right? Maybe I burnt the steak, or maybe I was just a bit rude to my wife (ha!), or perhaps she’s having a rough day at work and takes it out on me. For an adult, there are always these "excuses" or mitigating circumstances to wrap our heads around. But when parents hit a child? There aren't any excuses or easy ways to justify it; it's just pure, heavy hardship! A kid doesn't even truly understand what they did wrong, and the absolute worst part is the realization that they're being struck by their own parents! At that age—and for many people throughout their entire lives, unfortunately, since some folks stay immature forever—parents are basically GODS to a child! I have never once laid a hand on my daughter, and looking around at the world today, I am so incredibly proud of that! 👍

But honestly, I have to disagree because that isn't how it worked for me. I knew exactly when I messed up, even when I was only three years old... And I’ll tell you this: back then at three, and now at thirty, my parents are still absolute GODS on this earth to me. Their authority always made sense. Every single time there was a punishment or a discipline, I either got a clear explanation afterward or plenty of warnings beforehand. I was a high-energy kid, and they knew exactly how to raise me while making sure I felt completely loved!

Morgan Cooper34 said:Go read the thread about violent children. Personally, I've sat there and watched kids slap, spit at, and scream at their parents while the mother just crouches down next to them saying, "Oh honey, we don't do that."
Those kids grow up to be delinquents.

As for that bolded part, I was talking about parental statements and parental actions. In the sense that you truly never know how a single critique, a smack, or even just a harsh tone might wreck a child's self-esteem and shape their future behavior.

John Parker5—you're comparing spanking a kid for every little thing to "major" offenses. Take me, for example. I got my first real beating when I swiped candy from a convenience store for the fourth time. I was four years old. For the first three times, my mom tried the gentle approach—"Sweetie, that's not right, that's not okay." But honestly? If she hadn't laid the hammer down on that fourth time, I probably would've kept stealing.

I'm right there with the author on this one. 👍
I definitely support discipline when it's necessary. I remember mine clearly, and even now at thirty years old, I know I earned every bit of it. 🤷
Once, my dad really laid into me because I went outside during a New Year's Eve celebration in a rough part of town where bullets were actually flying through the air. My dad had explicitly forbidden it, but I went anyway. When I finally walked through the door, he was absolutely white with worry and rage. He headed straight for me and I tried to lock myself in my room... 😁 but he kicked the door down and gave me what I deserved. It worked, too; I never thought about doing something that reckless again.
He once told me that every disciplinary measure he took was JUST ANOTHER FORM OF LOVE, because if he didn't love me, he wouldn't bother looking out for me in the first place. Looking back, I'm actually grateful to him and my mom for every lesson they taught me. 😍 And I don't carry any trauma from it!
I should also mention that having a busy modern schedule isn't an excuse for poor parenting. My parents held high-level executive positions and were incredibly busy, but they made up for it with the quality of the time they spent raising me, rather than just the quantity.
There was no way I wasn't eating whatever Mom cooked (if she got upset and stayed silent, I’d lose my dinner privileges!), which taught me to respect the food provided. There was no way I wasn't in bed by 8 PM, brushing my teeth, or greeting every guest who walked through our front door. No swearing, no cursing, 🙂 and so on... not to mention the absolute respect we showed our teachers and professors in school.
Nowadays, when I see my best friend, it’s heartbreaking. She has spoiled her daughter rotten because she refuses to discipline her when she deserves it. The little girl fights with kids in preschool and even hits the nannies watching her just because they won't give her everything she wants—just like her mom does, who just buys her gifts because she's too afraid to actually parent. This kid has been a little tyrant since she was four, and her parents can't even have a second child because she's too demanding, yet they refuse to see that they are the ones failing! Every time they go out, it’s a total meltdown because she’s hysterical when she doesn't get her way, and if they give in, there's no end to the demands. It turns a simple outing into whatever whim the child has. It's a disaster! 👎

nimbleheron47 said:Don't sweat it too much—I booked all the big stuff a year and three months early, and by then, the band I actually wanted was already gone...

We were also scouting venues two years ahead, just to get a feel for pricing, capacity, and general terms. Some people actually asked us if we were *sure* we'd still be together in two years, 😬 though.

If you know someone who’s already been through the wedding ringer—like a family member or a close friend—they might give you a better idea of how things actually work on the ground. Since I was the first one in my circle to tie the knot, I didn't really have anyone to go to for advice. Plus, I don't live in San Francisco, so I was doing everything remotely. Starting the research two years early worked perfectly for me; it kept everything stress-free and let me pick exactly what I wanted, rather than settling for whatever was left over on my chosen date.

When it comes to making invitations, boutonnieres, thank-you notes, or favors, I'm a big fan of the DIY route. 😁 You get to make it exactly your style, and you can definitely keep the costs down.

I picked up my supplies online (mostly on eBay), grabbed ribbons at Good Partner in the Industrial District (Washington, D.C.), and got my paper and cardstock from Grafko on Orchard Street (Washington, D.C.). I think Grafko ships all over the US, and you can ask them to send sample packs of paper and cardstock—I know they'll send those for free if you ask. There's a shop in Dugopolj that carries some of the ribbons from Good Partner, but unless you have a business license or something, you'll end up spending a minimum of $100 (they also have a huge selection of flowers, decor, fancy paper, baskets, etc.), and they tend to be pricier than the shops in D.C.

I was in the exact same boat! No one in my family was getting married, most of my girlfriends were already hitched, and some weren't even dating, so I felt like I was totally flying blind when it came to experience or help. I spent two years lurking on forums, then we put down the deposit for the venue about fifteen months out. We locked in the church, the DJ, and the photographer exactly one year in advance. And yeah, everyone kept asking us if we'd still be together in a year! 🙄 Of course, paying those deposits so far in advance made things much easier on our budget, and it gave me enough time to DIY all the decorations and boutonnieres myself...🤷

Jeremy Anderson8 said:Thanks so much, ladies....
We’re looking at roughly 360 people, give or take a few........
As for the date, we were leaning towards August 6th or maybe August 13th, 2011. I’m asking now because I really want to make sure we book a nice, airy, spacious hall—somewhere where we won't be melting from the heat—and those dates just work best for us. Mostly because family is coming in from all over the country, so everyone is usually free during the summer........plus, honestly, our budget isn't quite ready for this until next year anyway....
If you happen to know of any other venues located somewhere along the route from the Industrial District through San Francisco and over toward Savannah....that can accommodate about that many guests............please hit me up via private message!
Also, I've been wondering, is it actually worth the hassle to DIY the invitations and the boutonniere kits? Like, is it a total waste of time?
And does anyone know the best spots to shop for everything, from the paper stock to the flowers and all that stuff..........
If you have any other advice at all, please share it.....thanks a million, and good luck to all the future brides out there! I hope everything turns out exactly how you envisioned it........😍😉🙂

Uff, isn't two years in advance a bit much?😲 I booked mine a year and three months ahead, and even that felt way too early, but that was only because I was hunting for a specific venue in San Francisco and my guest list is huge. Honestly, I don't think a restaurant would even be able to give you an accurate quote this far out. Maybe try aiming for late 2010 instead?

rapidmason10 said:I'll shoot you a DM with the contact info for some folks I know—Dragun. They did an incredible job for a girl who used to post under the handle "future bride," and honestly, I can't say enough good things about them.👍>

I have to jump in and second that—Dragun is absolutely fantastic! 👍

Raymond Brooks7 said:My go-to is definitely the John Doe flower shop over in Malibu... you really can't go wrong there. The woman running the place is incredible at what she does.

I have to agree! I actually go to John Doe’s flower shop in Malibu near Mary Piplica, and it is just wonderful. I've been going there for about 15 years now for pretty much every occasion! She is truly amazing! 👍

Anonymous said:So, what I'm hearing is I just show up there and ask him to get me on the books? 😍
Honestly, it’s been totally seamless for us. I'll bring him the liturgical calendar for next year—Ash Wednesday falls on February 17th—and we can easily arrange for a priest to come out to us. My future godmother's uncle actually performed the baptisms for both my brother and sister at a different parish he wasn't even assigned to. 🤷

Exactly! Just tell him you're insisting. Point out that you didn't show up a year and a half early, but rather 9 or 10 months ahead of time... explain that you and your fiancé really want that specific date, and that's that. Let him take a piece of paper, write down the date and time, and tuck it into the back of his old liturgical planner. Don't let anyone confuse or intimidate you, especially not the priest! It's not like he's going to get flustered because he doesn't know how to organize a wedding reception! 😳 For me, my priest kept asking why I was in such a rush, if I was being too impatient or too persistent, and he'd just laugh... but hey, he did eventually write it down, and sure enough, time proved that I was right all along! Tell him straight up that you have the hall booked and you need the church on that specific day, otherwise, there won't be a wedding! In my case, I was dealing with St. Francis Parish over in Manhattan...

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kontra says: In the end, you're probably going to be right... I just called the parish office and they basically brushed me off because they don't even have the calendar set for next year yet. 🤷 Now I'm totally lost. We were thinking about booking the hall because we figured we could handle everything ourselves, but now I'm second-guessing everything... should I go ahead and book this hall or look for somewhere else?! I'm honestly terrified that when I call back at the end of November to lock in a date at the church, they'll tell me they're fully booked and I'll miss out. (And the priest actually mentioned it too—he said since the calendar isn't finalized, he has no clue what the schedule looks like for that day or if it's even available!)... Ugh, I'm feeling so overwhelmed and confused right now, I really don't know what my next move should be. 🙄

Don't sweat the part you highlighted. If it were a major holiday, a feast day, or some big religious observance, they would have warned you immediately, because those dates have to be logged in the liturgical calendar/official registry. That’s where they track all the Masses, baptisms, and everything else happening.
The only thing is, if that priest can't accommodate you, he'll probably just suggest that you bring your own priest instead!🤷

Anonymous said:I guess I'll end up being right... I just called the parish office and they basically brushed me off because they don't even have the liturgical calendar set for next year yet. 🤷
Now I'm stuck. We were planning on reserving the hall because we didn't think we could pull this off on our own, but now I have no clue... should I go ahead and book this hall or look for somewhere else?!
I'm terrified that by the time November rolls around and I call to secure the date at the church, they'll tell me they're fully booked (the priest even hinted at it—he said since there's no calendar yet, he can't guarantee anything for that day)...

Man, I am so stressed and confused right now. I have absolutely no idea what to do next. 🙄

Don't let it get to you! Just stay persistent. Tell him you've already booked the reception hall and that you absolutely need that specific date... Honestly, the office gave me the exact same runaround. They told me they couldn't officially register me because the liturgical calendar for next year wasn't out yet (this was back in September for an event in the following September). But after I kept pushing, they scribbled my info on a scrap of paper and pinned it to the last day of the current year on the old calendar... Once the new book arrived in November, he called me back and got me officially on the books.
Besides, if you're getting married in February, that's less than a year away anyway! 😠
When I went in during January to give my confirmation, he just looked me dead in the eye and told me there were three other weddings lined up right after mine on that same day! 😳 If I had waited half a year like he suggested, I would've ended up having to walk down the aisle at 9 PM in total darkness! 😲

stormyraven46 said:Oh, absolutely!!! Honestly, people usually just grab a few pounds of random store-bought cookies wrapped in paper, and they end up getting mixed in with everything else anyway...

😲 Are you for real?!!
Thanks for the heads-up, I had no clue! 🤷