Female sterilization: What are your thoughts?

Look, we already agreed he’d go through with the sterilization... but I’ve been sitting here waiting for an actual year for him to follow through. Honestly, I’d rather just handle it myself than deal with any more "surprises." My OB-GYN mentioned that the whole process is significantly easier now than it used to be—apparently, most things are done outpatient via laparoscopy—so I’m curious if anyone here has firsthand experience 😁

This feels so restrictive. In India, women can get sterilized at almost any age, but here in the States, they make you wait until you're 35. Does anyone know if there's a way to pay for it privately if you don't meet the standard criteria (meaning you're under 35, have no kids, and no history of miscarriages)?

I couldn't find an existing thread on this before starting my own, so if one already exists, please merge this one.

As the title suggests, I’m looking to hear from women here who have gone through with sterilization.

I'm over 35 now, and after dealing with major complications during my last pregnancy, I'm just done. Between those health scares and the fact that I really don't want to deal with more hormone therapy for my own wellbeing, I'm seriously considering this option.
I've read that doctors like Dr. Miller are pretty strict about it—apparently, you have to be over 35 and meet specific medical criteria to get approved by a review board. Honestly, it caught me off guard; it seems like way more red tape than what you see with abortion discussions.

As far as I know, they do that. I know a woman who had the procedure done during her second C-section. She checked all the boxes—over 35, two kids already—and just decided to go for it.
I don't see the drama here—it’s just about meeting the medical requirements and giving consent for the surgery.
If you aren't looking to have more kids but still want safe sex, then why not? 🙂
Check in with your doctor (if I remember right, your first was a C-section, so yours will probably be too) to see if they can handle it during the delivery—then it's smooth sailing in America 🙂

Good luck. Honestly, I don't know what it's like to deal with a high-risk pregnancy (I'm a pretty lousy incubator myself), so 🙂 I'm sending good vibes that this whole thing wraps up quickly.

Susan Diaz91 said:From what I know, they actually do that. I know a woman who had it done while she was having her second baby via C-section. She met all the criteria—over 35, two kids already—and just went for it.
I don't see why people are making such a big deal out of this; if you meet the requirements and give consent, that's that.
If you aren't looking to have more kids but still want safe sex, then why not? 🙂
Just talk to your doctor (if I recall correctly, you had your first one via C-section, so you'll probably have the next one the same way) and see if they can perform the procedure during the C-section so you can just have peace of mind in America. 🙂

Good luck. Honestly, I don't know what it's like to deal with a high-risk pregnancy (I'm a terrible incubator myself), so 🙂 I'm sending plenty of good vibes your way so this whole thing wraps up quickly.

Why would you assume the second one would be a C-section too? Is there even a rule about that? My first one was a C-section because my condition became an emergency, not because natural birth wasn't an option. I've thought about the possibility, but it feels like hospitals push for natural birth until the very last second unless I end up crashing into HELLP again. If it ends up being a C-section, I guess that's just how it'll be.
I can't keep gambling with my life or my health, let alone the lives of my children, because they need me around.
I'm also wondering if endometriosis creates any specific hurdles in this situation, since I'm "blessed" with that, too.

Angela Wright said:Why would you think anything else would be a C-section? Is there some rule I don't know about? My first was a C-section because my condition was urgent—not because natural birth wasn't working. I've thought about the possibility, but it feels like they push for natural labor until the very last second unless I end up back in HELLP. If it comes down to a C-section, then that’s what happens. I can't gamble with my life or my health anymore—or my kids' lives, since they need me.

Look, I'm no doctor, but

1. Preeclampsia
2. HELLP syndrome

are massive red flags for me to demand a C-section.
I don't know, Angela—with my history of deep vein thrombosis, I lost my first baby at 7 months. I don't play games with diagnoses like that.

With your medical history, by week 36 I’d already be begging them to deliver me by week 38 and booking the surgeon myself.

You aren't exactly young, and those diagnoses aren't exactly ideal for pregnancy. Think about it...

During my second pregnancy, I was delivered before 38 weeks, and the third one too... the staff at Mayo Clinic wouldn't take any risks with me.
Go to a better hospital. That place might claim to be "for the children," but they're an enemy to mothers... don't leave your life—plus the life you're carrying (you have a living child at home who needs you)—up to some random incompetent fool on duty during one of the three shifts.🙂

restlessfox7 said:Does anyone have any more info on tubal ligation? Has anyone actually done it? Any experiences to share?

So, I went through with a tubal ligation—after my third C-section. The doctors were pretty blunt about it, saying another pregnancy would be life-threatening for me. Basically, if the baby grows, there's a risk of the placenta attaching to the uterine wall and causing a rupture—which, yeah, can be fatal for the mom. Once they laid it out like that, I didn't really have a choice, especially since I wasn't planning on having more kids anyway. One side effect, though, was early menopause; I had the procedure at 36, and now, six years later, I'm already dealing with perimenopause. As far as the actual surgery goes, it doesn't hurt at all—it's done under anesthesia. They did mine right after my last delivery using an epidural, so you're fully aware of what's happening but feel zero pain. Don't worry, ladies—you'll just be numb from the belly button down for about half a day until the anesthesia wears off. Just a heads-up: most public hospitals won't do this unless there’s a serious medical necessity. If you just want it for birth control, you'll likely have to go to a private clinic. Hope that helps!

Angela Wright said:I couldn't find an existing thread about this before starting a new one—so if there is one, please merge this.

So, like the title says, I’m looking to hear from women here who actually went through with sterilization.

I'm over 35 now, and after dealing with massive complications during my last pregnancy, I am just *done*—I don't want to shove any more hormones into my body, especially with my health concerns. So, I'm seriously weighing this option.
From what I've read, doctors here are pretty strict about it—apparently, you have to be over 35 and meet specific medical criteria to even get considered, which then goes to a review board and all that. Honestly, it caught me off guard... I mean, why is there so much more red tape for this than there is for an abortion?

I went through it myself—check my previous post on the board for the details. I had three C-sections total. The second one was because of gestational diabetes (which thankfully didn't happen again), and the third was due to preeclampsia. If you have more questions, just hit me up in a private message.

Susan Diaz91 said:Look, I’m no MD, but

between preeclampsia
and HELLP syndrome

those are massive red flags for me to be asking for a C-section.
I don't know, Angela Wright—with my history of deep vein thrombosis, I lost my first baby at seven months. I don't play games when those kinds of diagnoses are on the table.

With your medical profile, by week 36, I’d already be begging them to let me deliver at week 38 and practically scheduling the surgeon myself.

You aren't exactly a kid, and your diagnoses aren't exactly "ideal" for pregnancy, so just think about it...

During my second pregnancy, I was delivered before reaching 38 weeks, and the third one too... over at Mayo Clinic, they wouldn't even dream of taking that risk with me.
Go to a decent hospital. That local community hospital might be great for kids, but they're a nightmare for moms... don't gamble with the life you're carrying plus your own life (you've got a living child at home who needs you). Don't just leave everything up to some hospital policy or some random, half-baked resident on duty during a night shift trying to force a vaginal birth.🙂

I’m with Larezg-oni on this—if you’ve already had a C-section and you're facing another high-risk pregnancy, you’re going in via C-section whether you like it or not. I didn't want it either, but when the doctors tell you it's necessary, you do it. Everything turned out fine, I had the epidural—and hey, look at me, I'm alive! You aren't the first person this has happened to. I know plenty of women who actually *demanded* a C-section, only to be told "no, you're delivering naturally," and that's exactly what happened! Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy—hope everything goes smoothly—once you finally hold your little angel, YOU WILL FORGET ALL OF THIS!!!

So, if a woman is 35 or older and hasn't had kids yet—assuming there isn't some medical reason stopping her—is she just barred from getting a sterilization procedure?

Lisa Myers said:So, basically, if women over 35 haven't had kids yet and don't have some medical condition preventing it—they just aren't allowed to get sterilized?

From what I've gathered, they can, but they have to provide specific reasons, and then a hospital review board decides whether or not to approve the procedure.

Thanks for the advice and the info, ladies. As far as the Holy Spirit goes, I know where I'm headed. I spent 74 days in that place and made it through. I know the doctors, and specifically, I know their neonatal unit is top-tier. They saved my baby, so if God forbid we need them again, I know we're in good hands.

I am currently in the middle of making arrangements for my sterilization procedure... I still have to undergo the standard pre-op screenings and everything else required before surgery. Provided all the medical checks come back clear, I plan to go through with the operation at the beginning of next month. I have more than the required 35 years of age and two children, yet not a single soul has questioned my decision or asked for one solitary reason why I want this... They might attempt to grill me once I actually arrive at the hospital, but they certainly won't be able to deny me... and there is absolutely no cost involved.

Just checking in here to leave a record for anyone else going through this...
My pregnancy ended early again at 34 weeks due to high blood pressure. They had to rush me into an emergency C-section, primarily because my first delivery involved a vertical incision on the uterus—which means any attempt at a vaginal birth carries a massive risk of uterine rupture. Throughout my entire hospital stay while they were monitoring me, I kept telling the nurses and doctors that I wanted to get sterilized. Their response was always some vague, "When the time comes, just let us know." Well, the time finally came. I was all sedated and being moved up to the OR, and I told one nurse, then another, then the midwives: "I want the sterilization." Every single person just told me, "Just tell the doctor." So, the doctor finally shows up to wait for the anesthesiologist, and I tell him straight up: I want the tubal ligation. He looks at me like I’m crazy and says, "We can't just do that on a whim; you should have requested this earlier, it has to go through a review board." I mean, give me a break! I'm 36, this is my second complicated pregnancy, and they honestly aren't even sure what's happening with my health after all the tests I've run before and during this term. Then he actually has the nerve to imply I don't meet the criteria because I don't have at least three kids. I looked him dead in the eye and said, "Doctor, you're the expert here—would you personally recommend I go through another pregnancy like this?" He just raised an eyebrow and said, "I need to make a call." He disappears for a few minutes and comes back saying, "Alright, I checked, you're cleared." Honestly, uffffffffff. I have no idea who he called—probably the Chief of Medicine or something. Anyway, he sat down with a nurse, dictated my statement, I signed the paperwork, and we bundled the procedure with the C-section. Everything went perfectly. No side effects at all.

Hey everyone, I was wondering if anyone here has gone through laparoscopic sterilization? If you have, could you please share some details? I’m curious about everything—how you prepared, how long you had to stay in the hospital, what the pain was like afterward, and the overall recovery process. Since other forms of birth control aren't an option for me and I'm definitely done having kids, I've been thinking about this more and more. Thanks in advance!

neoncyclist792 said:Hi everyone—I was wondering if anyone here has undergone laparoscopic sterilization and could share some specifics? I’m curious about everything: the prep work, how long you typically stay at the hospital, what the post-op pain is like, and the overall recovery timeline. Since other contraceptive options aren't an option for me, and I'm certain my days of having children are behind me, I’ve been giving this method a lot of thought. Thanks in advance!

I’m in the same boat—thinking about this quite a bit myself and would love to hear any insights if anyone has them.

Is there seriously nobody on this forum who’s had an oophorectomy outside of a major hospital system?

Starting this thread because I need some insight. I'm over 35, no kids, no history of abortions, and I've been on the pill forever—first for cystic acne, then just for birth control. I want to settle this once and for all. I don't want kids, but I definitely don't want to deal with an abortion either.
Angina pectoris runs in my family; both my parents have been diagnosed with it.
That’s why I’m asking. I have a cardiology appointment in October for some testing regarding AP, and if they give me that diagnosis, would I even be allowed to get sterilized?
Can I just go through a private clinic for this?

It’s honestly better if the guy just goes ahead and gets sterilized. Personally, I could never bring myself to undergo the procedure, even if I were the most vocal opponent of having children... 😳 ☕

Personally, I feel that if a woman is certain she doesn't want more kids—or just doesn't want them at all—she should be the one to handle the sterilization. I mean, we can get divorced, sure, but why should he be the one penalized by being unable to start a new family down the road? From what I've heard, hospitals in Cleveland make the whole process pretty straightforward.

Betty Nelson71, you might want to check which private clinics in the area offer laparoscopy. It’s worth giving them a call directly to see if they handle sterilization as well.