I split my head open—and no, it wasn't because I'm clumsy

Kate Cox2 said:maybe it’s just a new haircut tomorrow 🥳

So, that’s how you pull off one of those French twists using just a tiny bit of hair.

I feel enlightened. 🙏

Sandra Wood45 said:I locked my car door right onto my thumb (and yes, I definitely slammed it shut all the way 😲

Well, that explains why you're such a tough cookie🙂!

Honestly, I seem to be a bit of an expert at putting my entire body weight onto one tiny little part of myself—you know the type? Like when I slip barefoot on a wet tile floor in the kitchen and end up slamming my big toe into the cabinet, or when a wave knocks me over at the beach and it’s always my toe that takes the hit. Once, I actually tripped on some stairs and landed squarely on just one—not both, mind you, just one—butt cheek; I couldn't sit down for days! If I were any older, I'm convinced I'd spend half my life in a cast.😁

And then there are my ridiculous, slightly rusty toenail clippers—I'm constantly nicking myself, yet I can never quite bring myself to buy a new set (it's honestly surprising they've even lasted this long, they're those little old $27, tiny little things...).

By the way, when am I actually supposed to get a tetanus shot? The last time was... well, probably back in high school? I really don't feel like dealing with it—my phobia of needles is getting worse by the day—but then again... I suppose it's better not to mess around with stuff like that.

lonebear3 said:Just asking out of curiosity—is anyone else dealing with issues with their peripheral vision, or just seeing things blurry in general?

After a string of ridiculous accidents, a family member of mine went in for a routine checkup and found out they have actual tunnel vision. Basically, they can't register anything below knee level or anything off to the side.

I’m talking constant shoulder hits against doorframes, slamming elbows into coffee tables—the usual clumsy stuff.

Yeah, I definitely do. It's constant. Honestly, though, it feels more like I see everything fine, I just suck at judging how far away things actually are.

Kate Cox2 said:I’m reading through this thread and honestly, I can't stop laughing...

Thank God the mod renamed this thing... because let's be real, I'm getting zero actual medical advice for my pounding headache here...

Seriously though, how are you feeling? I literally wrote a whole deep-dive post just for you. Look, I'm no doctor or anything, but I shared everything I know. Talk about ungrateful! 🤦 :clutchingtableandfaintingunconsciously: :grabbingthetableclothandflippingalltheplatesonit: from: 🤣

coppergardener said:that’s why you’re such a tough cookie🙂 now!

Honestly, I’m basically a specialist at slamming my entire body weight onto one tiny little spot—you know, like when you slip barefoot on a wet kitchen tile and your big toe meets a corner of a cabinet, or when a wave wipes you out at the beach and you land right on your foot. Case in point: I once wiped out on some stairs and landed entirely on one (not both, just one!) butt cheek. I couldn't sit down for days. If I were any older, I’d probably be living in a cast.😁

And then there's my ridiculous, half-rusted toenail clippers. I’m constantly nicking myself, yet I can't bring myself to buy new ones (I honestly don't know how they got this rusty—they're Solingen, $27, tiny little things...).

Btw, when am I actually supposed to get a tetanus shot? Last time was... I think... back in high school? I’m really not feeling it—my phobia of needles is getting worse by the day—but then again... better safe than sorry, I guess.

Those clippers sound just like mine, though mine haven't given me any trouble yet.

But since you brought up tetanus, I was actually just listing off all the reasons my partner had to get me vaccinated the other day. My best story is from when I was practicing for the Olympics opening ceremonies; I was sitting on a bench, the wood gave way, and I ended up landing right on a rusty nail. 🤣

Sandra Wood45 said:Look, I’m not saying I have a medical degree or anything, but I poured my heart into that entire serious post! Everything I know, I shared with you. Honestly, such ingratitude! 🤦 :clumsy_table_flip: from 🤣

I offer my deepest, most sincere apologies... truly, my bad, my bad...

🙏: 🙏: 🙏: 🙏:

Sandra Wood45 said:Speaking of tetanus, I was actually just going over my vaccination records with my husband the other day. It reminded me of this ridiculous incident back when I was training for the Olympic trials; I was sitting on a bench that decided to give way right under me, sending me straight onto a rusted nail. 🤣

And people still have the nerve to tell you that being an athlete is all sunshine and health 😁

So I’m sitting in this local college dive bar, just watching people walk straight into a glass wall...
Basically, there's this massive glass partition right by the exit. Most people don't even notice it; they take one step forward and—bam—nose hits the glass.

We’re all just sitting there, laughing at them (and occasionally seeing bits fly everywhere)...
Anyway, a buddy asks me to grab something from my car, so I head out after him.
I was actually being careful because I didn't want to end up like those other guys, so I took a second to check how to navigate around the wall...

Then I start heading out (just a normal step toward the door), when suddenly something snaps in my head!
My instinct makes me turn my head, but I keep moving straight and slam my forehead right into the glass 🙏

Long story short, I stumble outside, clutching my head, and realize I've sliced myself open about a good three-quarters of an inch... absolute madness...

I didn't go back to that cafe for a while.🤣

Ugh... I just had a random flashback to that jerk in the Chase Bank lobby (right by the subway station near downtown Chicago) and that one time I slammed my forehead into a monument—actually left a tiny dent in the brass it was made of 😬

And, naturally, a mild concussion followed 😁 😁

Kyle Nelson2 said:I haven't been to that coffee shop in quite some time. To be perfectly honest, I’ve drifted away from my usual routine there lately. 🤣

That is incredibly wise! Truly, a profound point. 😬

Kate Cox2 said:It happens to me every once in a while at some fancy bank where they keep the glass so spotless you can't tell if there's an actual door there or just open space...

Oh, tell me about it! I’ve walked straight into a glass door twice—and both times it was at the exact same Chase branch. I honestly thought it was one of those automatic doors that had already slid open.😬

Anyway, how’s everyone’s head feeling today?

Sam Castillo7 said:Oh, tell me about it! I actually slammed into the doors twice at the exact same Chase Bank branch. I honestly thought they were those automatic sensor doors that had already triggered and just... failed to move.😬

Anyway, how is your head feeling today?

The pain has subsided a bit, but there's still this 1.5 to 2 cm gap right in the middle of my part.
I am still genuinely terrified of brushing my hair... I think I'll just go take a dip in the ocean today; maybe the salt water will help soothe things up.

Kate Cox2 said:It hurts less, sure—but now there’s still a 1.5-2 cm gap right in the middle of my slit.
I'm honestly terrified of even brushing my hair... I'm just gonna go take a dip in the ocean today and hope the salt water does some magic.

Look, you'll be fine. It'll heal.
Just don't go doing any headstands or anything stupidly risky. 😁

Sam Castillo7 said:It’ll be fine, you'll get through this.
Just please, don't go doing anything reckless, like jumping off any rooftops or anything crazy. 😁

Risky?? Good grief, I’ve been practically hunching over while walking around my apartment for three days straight, terrified that I might accidentally bump into a window or catch the edge of an upper cabinet door...

What jumps? I can barely stand up straight! 😬

Honestly, you guys have me in stitches 🤣

Since you were all so kind, let me share one of my own clumsy mishaps...
Picture this: It’s pouring rain. I’m in a rush to get home because I have an appointment with my doctor (due to a certain little accident, details later 😬). I walk out to my car, only to find a flat tire!! What am I supposed to do? I decide to change the tire myself 😎. I wait for the rain to let up just a tiny bit, then grab the lug wrench. You know the drill: you have to give it a good stomp with your foot first to loosen it, jack up the car, and then unscrew it the rest of the way. The problem? It had been raining for a while. Everything was soaked and slippery—including my reebokica
. So, I go to put my full weight onto that wrench (which, by the way, has a VERY sharp edge on the end), but instead of hitting the tool, my foot decides to slip right off that sharp edge and wedge itself between the wrench and the wheel. A 15cm gash on my leg. Five years later, the scar is still there
.
Anyhow, I didn't bother with a tetanus shot since I'd already received one less than 24 hours prior (because of that incident I mentioned earlier)
. 🙄 (For those wondering, the "incident" involved a wooden slide at the park; a splinter snapped off and lodged itself right in my... well, my backside 😬)

steelfalcon21 said:Oh, you all have me laughing until I cry! 🤣

Since I feel I owe you all a debt for the amusement, allow me to share one of my own rather clumsy little episodes...
Picture this: It is pouring rain. Absolutely torrential. I am in a massive hurry to get home because I have an appointment with my doctor (regarding a certain medical mishap, details provided below 😬), and just as I reach my car, I realize I have a flat tire!! I am standing there thinking, "What on earth am I going to do?" So, I decide to change the tire myself 😎. I waited for the rain to let up just a tiny bit, then grabbed that large L-shaped lug wrench. As anyone who knows anything about cars can tell you, the proper technique is to give it a firm shove with your foot first to break the tension, then jack up the car and unscrew it the rest of the way... Well, the rain had been coming down harder earlier, so everything was soaking wet and incredibly slippery—including my reebokica. When I went to plant my foot firmly against that wrench (which, mind you, has a VERY sharp edge on the opposite end) instead of hitting the wrench, my foot decided to take its own path! It slipped right off that SHARP edge and wedged itself directly between the wrench and the wheel... A 15cm laceration on my leg. Even now, five years later, the scar remains
.
Anyhow, I didn't bother getting a tetanus shot because I had actually received one less than 24 hours prior (due to that medical incident I mentioned at the start)

(For those curious, the mishap involved me going down a wooden slide, and a splinter snapped off and embedded itself right into my... well, my backside 🙄 😬 )

But hey, at least you know how to change a tire...😬

I’ve bumped my head against actual objects plenty of times, but honestly? That’s nothing compared to the stuff happening in my dreams.
Seriously, I’ve woken up more than once with a literal knot on my head!!!
It feels like I’m slamming right into the edge of the bed frame or hitting a wall mid-dream...
Then I get up in the morning, look in the mirror, and there it is—a massive bump right in the middle of my forehead.🤣 🤣 🤣
When I show up at the office, people start asking what happened to me, and I just... I don't even know how to explain it.

Back when I was basically a kid in sixth grade, I decided to try walking down a section of the street with my eyes shut just to see how far I could go in a straight line 😁.

I ended up slamming face-first into a pole just a few feet away like a total idiot. I completely smashed my glasses—thank God my eyes were closed, otherwise the glass would have flown straight into my eye 😁 😁. And all this happened barely three yards from my house. I walked through the front door in complete shock and pure panic because I didn't even know how to tell my parents what happened. It was such an embarrassing situation that I just blurted out exactly why I did it right then and there. 😁 😁

lonebear3 said:Just out of curiosity, do you struggle with your peripheral vision, or just your sight in general?

After a few close calls, a family member found out during a routine checkup that they have constricted field of vision. It’s why they can't seem to spot things down by their knees or lower.

Think of constant trips—shoulders hitting doorframes or knees bumping into the coffee table.

I deal with this all the time. 😳

By the way, I wear glasses and have astigmatism (if anyone could give me a quick breakdown of what that actually means, I'd appreciate it 🙂

astigmatism

It might also be that
a) your prescription isn't quite right
b) the glasses weren't made correctly
I actually went through this myself with option B—I ended up tossing out a few pairs of glasses from high-end boutiques at the mall because they just didn't work!