Resources and support for families dealing with cancer and serious illness

Since we're talking about alternatives:

Mainstream medicine gave my dad maybe six months to live. No more.
But, at his buddies' urging, he ended up seeing the late Mladen Markovica in Boston. Mladen told him there were five basic rules to live by. I can't for the life of me remember all five, but I do recall:

He could eat pork, just nothing too fatty,
Skip the coffee,
It's good that he doesn't smoke,
Maybe a single shot of bourbon a day—though he's hesitant to suggest that since "patients" tend to overdo it.
And a few other things...

It’s been about 30 years since then, and my old man's heart is still going strong.
Six months?
Yeah, right.

Anyway, hope that gives you guys a little comfort... I'll try to dig up those exact rules Mladen mentioned.

__________________________________________________ ___________
Miroslavka Ružičić Stefanović is buried at Barutana.

slyseal28 said:I don't feel targeted; I just happen to disagree with your take... No hard feelings, obviously.
My point is simply that alternative therapies and conventional medicine ought to work hand in hand. And if we're talking about "alternative" approaches, wouldn't you agree that proper nutrition falls under that umbrella too?

At the end of the day, we're all just trying to find what works best for our loved ones. Some people swear by strictly conventional medicine and trust it implicitly. Others opt exclusively for holistic routes. Then there are those who believe a combination is the winning strategy. Who is actually right? It’s impossible to say. The bottom line is finding something to believe in so we can help ourselves and our families...

Regardless, I agree—what matters is having something to hold onto and helping our people in whatever way we deem most effective. Is anyone truly "right"? Honestly, it doesn't matter. What really matters is that we support one another through this... sharing our experiences, our fears, our hopes, and even our grief.
Sending big hugs to everyone.

hey everyone
first off, thanks for the replies. big shoutout to Angela Wright, ipani, and ruggednomad182. you guys are basically the only decent people left in this thread. honestly, seeing how much you're willing to help out total strangers... it's pretty rare to see that kind of thing these days.

I've pretty much figured everything out now. Not sure there's much more I can actually do about it on my end. But yeah, the fight goes on.

I'll keep lurking and post again when I catch a break. Keep doing what you're doing. Wishing you and your families nothing but the best.

take care,😘 😁

p.s. Angela Wright, that stuff you said about Los Angeles really caught me off guard. Hard to believe people actually act like that, especially those in jobs that are supposed to be about helping others. Hopefully they're just outliers. That's all for now. Later.

Hey everyone!
It’s been a little while since we last checked in, though there haven't been any major "life updates" worth sharing until now. Mom has finally finished her radiation treatments and wrapped up her first round of Temodal. She actually headed out to the coast today. We were honestly worried she wouldn't be allowed to travel—given what the doctors initially told us—but during her most recent checkup, her oncologist gave her the green light. Given everything she's going through, we really want her to soak up some sun and enjoy herself while she can. Things aren't exactly easy right now, but for the moment, we have things under control.
Take care, all!

Amanda Williams64 said:Hey everyone!
We’ve been off the grid for a bit—nothing major happened, we just needed some space. Mom finally finished her radiation sessions and wrapped up her first round of Temodal. She actually headed out to the beach today. We honestly thought she wouldn't be cleared for something like that, given what the doctors initially told us, but during her last checkup, the oncologist gave her the green light. Given everything she's fighting, she needs to soak up the sun while she can. Things aren't exactly perfect, but for right now, we have it under control.
Take care, all of you!

Check this out—there's an interesting thread on a glioblastoma forum about a new vaccine being used over in Switzerland. I stumbled upon it two days ago; not sure if you guys caught it yet.

Hi everyone.
I’m glad I stumbled upon this thread. Everything was going smoothly in my family until two months ago—we didn't even realize how good things were until they changed. Two months back, everything hit the fan. My grandfather was diagnosed with lung cancer that has already metastasized to his liver. He has withered away so much in just eight weeks; I barely recognize him anymore. Up until now, he’s been receiving care at a specialized pulmonary center near Denver. But this week, he was transferred to a hospital in a smaller town outside of Chicago to undergo a procedure to stop fluid buildup in his lungs. Today, my parents sat down with his doctor, and the verdict was grim: he might make it until the end of the year, or in a best-case scenario, maybe another year. We are honestly just numb. I don't know what to do. Since they started admitting him two months ago, I had a bad feeling about this, and I've been mentally bracing myself. Now that we have actual news, I'm just stuck. How should we handle this? Should we start preparing ourselves and him for the inevitable? Or do we just keep living our lives as if we don't know what's coming in a few months? And how do you tell him? Does he even need to be told? I feel like he needs to know so he can prepare, especially since, based on some things he's said lately, I think he already senses what's coming.
I'm really grateful I found this community.

Adam Fowler10 said:Best regards!
I'm stuck on how we should handle this. Should we start preparing ourselves and him for what’s coming? Or do we just keep living our lives like nothing is changing, pretending we don't know what's hitting us in a few months? How do I even bring it up, or should I even say anything at all? I feel like he needs to know and be prepared, though based on some things he's said lately, I suspect he already senses what's ahead.
I'm glad I found this group.

Treat him exactly how you always have. Your grandfather is who he is, whether he's sick or healthy. Just live your life as normally as you can, because honestly, nobody knows—not even the doctors—what’s going to happen an hour from now, let alone a month or a year down the line. Doctors rely on experience and statistics to give certain prognoses, but those aren't set in stone; they depend on a massive amount of unpredictable variables, sudden shifts, or even misdiagnoses... you have to account for all that uncertainty.
My mom is fighting one of the most aggressive and fast-moving cancers out there, a glioblastoma brain tumor. She was operated on by the top neurosurgeon in the country, and he gave her maybe a year tops. It’s been over two years since then, and she’s still here. Sure, she’s struggling, but she’s alive.
You’re 17, and you’ve already seen more of this disease than any teenager should ever have to; you clearly understand the reality of the situation. Do you really think a man with your grandfather's age and lifetime of experience actually needs an explanation?
Look, death is just a natural part of the cycle. As people get older and witness the same things happening to others that are now happening to their own loved ones, they learn to accept the fact that we are all mortal and temporary. That’s just the way it is, and fighting it is pointless because we can't change the outcome. Accepting the mortality of others—and eventually our own—is a fundamental part of growing up. Goodbyes are brutal, but they're inevitable, no matter when they happen. What we can hold onto, and what serves as comfort, is the fact that when an elderly person passes, we can look back with gratitude for everything they accomplished. Usually, the greatest success is simply raising children to be decent, hardworking people and getting to see your grandchildren grow up. A person like that can leave this world feeling successful, happy, and at peace.

Parting ways is incredibly hard, and it sucks that it always seems to happen so fast, but try to find some joy and gratitude in the fact that your grandfather has completed a full circle of life.
The best thing you and your family can do right now is spend every spare moment with him, ease his discomfort whenever possible, and try to maintain some semblance of a normal routine. If he senses your anxiety and restlessness, it's only going to make things harder for him.

Stay strong and keep your head up, kid.🙂

Trump, I really appreciate you. I’m truly glad I crossed paths with someone like you.

Adam Fowler10 said:Warm wishes to everyone!
I am honestly just so incredibly glad I stumbled upon this thread today. Everything was going so smoothly for my family until about two months ago—we didn't even realize how wonderful things were because we just took it for granted, you know? But then everything changed. My grandfather was diagnosed with lung cancer, and it has already metastasized to his ribs. In just these last eight weeks, he has weakened so much that I barely recognize him anymore. Up until now, he’s been receiving care at the specialized pulmonary center in Springfield, but this week they transferred him over to a hospital in Smalltown, USA, so they could perform a procedure to stop fluid from building up in his lungs. Today, my parents had a sit-down with his doctor, and the news was heavy—they’re looking at the end of this year, or maybe a year at most if he's lucky. We are all just completely stunned and reeling from it. I haven't really been looped into the specific medical details because my family keeps trying to shield me, treating me like I'm some little kid who wouldn't understand, even though I'm 17 and have actually spent quite a bit of time researching this disease and trying to wrap my head around the treatment plans; I really feel like they should be being more transparent with me. Honestly, ever since he was hospitalized two months ago, I had a gut feeling that something terrible was coming, so I've been slowly bracing myself, which is why I feel somewhat numb and today's news didn't hit me with quite the sharp sting I expected. I just don't know how we should handle this. Should we start preparing ourselves and him for what's coming? Or should we just keep living our lives normally, acting as if we don't know what's waiting for us in a few months? And how on earth do we tell him, or even *should* we tell him? I feel like he needs to know and needs to be prepared, especially since, based on some things he's said lately, I think he might already sense what's ahead of him.
I'm truly happy to have found this community.

Hey there! You know, I was also living in this bubble of total peacefulness just a few months back, right up until the moment we found out my mom had breast cancer. But, you know how it is—human beings eventually adapt to anything, and now we're just pushing forward and fighting through whatever comes our way. We always try to find that one silver lining, even when things look bleak.
Personally, I believe your grandfather needs to be told the truth about his condition, and honestly, I think it's part of the doctors' duty to ensure he knows what he's facing. It's very likely, just like you suspect, that he already has a sense of it given his own life experience. Like Angela Wright mentioned, you should just keep living your lives as you always have, and make sure to use this remaining time together in the absolute best way possible. Talk a lot, hang out, laugh... do all those things you haven't had the chance to do with him yet...
Your grandfather is probably just overjoyed to have a grandson like you! You have such a thoughtful heart!

Best of luck! 🙂

Carol Sanchez2, thanks. I wish you nothing but the best as well. We just have to accept whatever God has in store for us.

Hey there!! Sending greetings to everyone during these scorching days—I’m currently gearing up for my next round of chemo this coming Monday :-( I have some initial checkups tomorrow, and I’m really hoping for some good news... basically, praying that the treatment is actually doing its job. Until next time, fingers crossed for me...
Grace Fowler

Grace Fowler said:Hey there!! Sending love during this heatwave. I’m gearing up for my next chemo session this Monday :-( I have my first round of checkups tomorrow, and I’m praying the results look good—that the treatment actually worked. Until next time, fingers crossed...
Grace

It’s always good to see you on here.🙂
I really hope you can stay somewhere with decent AC.
I honestly can’t say enough good things about that device; I think my mom would have passed away if she didn't have it.

Otherwise, things have taken a massive turn for the worse. She’s dealing with constant headaches and can barely eat anything. The other day, it took me over an hour just to get her to swallow a few bites; she kept pushing the meat to the side, and because I didn't catch on immediately, she almost choked. I had to frantically dig the food out of her mouth with my fingers just to save her, and in the middle of all that chaos, she bit me so hard I actually saw stars. It’s bad. Really, really bad. She sleeps constantly and rarely even opens her eyes; I honestly feel like a coma is right around the corner.

Angela Wright said:It’s always good to see you popping up here.🙂
I really hope you've managed to find some air-conditioned relief.
She’s been praising that gadget constantly. Honestly, I think my mother would have passed away by now if it weren't for it.

Otherwise, things have taken a turn for the worse. She’s dealing with constant headaches, and eating has become an ordeal. Just the other day, it took me over an hour just to get her to eat something, and she kept pushing the meat aside—I didn't realize until the very last second when she started choking on it. I had to reach in and clear her throat manually, and in the chaos of it all, she bit my finger so hard I actually saw stars. It was terrifying. Things are looking grim; she’s sleeping almost continuously and rarely opens her eyes. I fear we might be approaching a coma.

I am so sorry. Sending you a huge hug and strength.

I have some wonderful news regarding my husband. 🙂

We finally got the call from the hospital—the CT scan results are in, and they say there are no suspicious processes, nothing unusual to report. In short, the results are great!
It’s honestly hard to put into words how we’re feeling right now or just how much of a weight has been lifted. These recent tests, especially this CT scan, really shook us up and left us pretty terrified. Most of the scans we did leading up to the PET scan made it clear the tumor was still there; at that point, we were just bracing ourselves and hoping to see its size decrease. But the PET scan showed that the Gadget is almost entirely gone. Because of that, the scintigraphy and X-ray findings actually threw us for a loop and made us feel a bit more anxious for a moment. Regardless, there’s no room for panic or fear anymore. We’re moving forward, feeling much happier and more at peace.
Mind you, he still has four cycles of chemotherapy left, which are scheduled to start on Monday, July 23rd. But we can see the finish line now. We’ll push through, we’ll win this fight against the Gadget, and we won't let it ever even think about coming back.

Sending my best to everyone—I truly hope you all receive some good news soon, too!

slyseal28 said:I have some wonderful news regarding my husband. 🙂

We finally got the call from the hospital—the CIA scan results are in, and they show absolutely nothing suspicious; there isn't a single red flag to be found. In short, the report is great!
It’s honestly hard to find the right words to describe the relief we’re feeling or just how happy we are. These recent tests, especially this latest scan, really shook us and left us feeling pretty terrified. With most of the testing we did leading up to the PET/CT, we were operating under the assumption that the tumor was still very much present, so we were basically just praying for it to shrink. But the PET/CT actually showed that the Gadget is almost entirely gone. Because of that, the previous scintigraphy and X-ray results had us totally thrown off and feeling like we’d taken a step backward. Regardless, there’s no room for panic or fear anymore. We’re moving forward, feeling lighter and more at peace.
He does still have four cycles of chemo left, which are scheduled to start this Monday, July 23rd. However, we can see the finish line now. We’ll push through, we’ll win this fight against the Gadget, and it won't ever even think about coming back.

Sending love to everyone—I hope you all get some good news soon too!

That is absolutely wonderful news🙂

I truly believe you are an incredibly brave and determined woman—a real fighter through and through—and I suspect your husband is on the road to recovery largely because he has you in his corner. I really hope both of you realize just how much that matters. 😘

Angela Wright said:It is good to see you here, as always.🙂
I hope you’re able to stay in some air conditioning.
I have blessed that device more times than I can count. Honestly, I think my mother would be dead without it.

Otherwise, her condition has taken a significant turn for the worse. She’s dealing with headaches, and eating has become an absolute struggle. The day before yesterday, it took me over an hour just to get her to eat anything—she kept pushing the meat to the side, and because I didn't catch on immediately, she actually started choking. I had to dig everything out of her mouth with my fingers at the last second, but she bit my finger so hard in the process that I saw stars. It is truly, deeply bad. She sleeps constantly; she rarely even opens her eyes. I fear a coma is imminent.

I am so sorry, dear, but please know we are thinking of you and sending you all the strength in the world... my father is also getting worse every single day... the headaches are there... he’s slowly forgetting things again, much like what happened three weeks ago when he slipped into a near-coma... when he wouldn't recognize anyone...
I wanted to mention this, though you probably already know, since your mother is struggling to eat... there are liquid supplements that act as complete meal replacements. They come in 250ml cartons and contain all the necessary nutrients—brands like Ensure Plus, Glucerna, and various others. You can even get them via prescription. They aren't a miracle cure, but they do provide some much-needed calories.
Thinking of you and sending a huge hug of strength!

Elizabeth Collins60 said:I feel so bad for you, but please know there are people here thinking of you and wishing you all the strength in the world... my dad is getting worse every single day too... the headaches won't stop... he’s starting to forget things again, which actually started about three weeks ago when he fell into a near-coma state... he wouldn't recognize anyone at all.
I wanted to mention—and you probably already know this if your mother is struggling to eat—that there are liquid supplements designed to act as full meal replacements. They come in those little 250ml cartons and pack in all the essential nutrients; brands like Ensure Plus, Glucerna, and several others. You can even get them via prescription. It’s not a magic fix, but it does help them get some much-needed calories in.
Thinking of you and sending a huge hug of strength!

Thanks😘 for the support.
I’m aware of Ensure, but I’m trying my hardest to keep her on real food for as long as possible. She still manages to eat some of it, but it’s an agonizingly slow process and requires constant supervision. My biggest fear is that she'll end up needing a feeding tube. That's my absolute worst nightmare. She was actually in that position once before, and she told me later how much she hated it—how horrible it felt. During that semi-comatose stretch, she couldn't remember anything else, so you can imagine how heavy that weight feels.😱

Just wanted to give everyone a quick update. My aunt has been at the hospital for radiation since the 15th. While she was staying at home, she actually recovered quite well and managed to build up enough strength for this upcoming radiotherapy session. As of today, she isn't having any major issues, though she is sleeping a lot—but honestly, with this heatwave, I can't really blame her! Thankfully, thank God, her hair hasn't started falling out yet...
Sending big hugs and kisses to everyone!

Angela Wright said:It’s so good to see you here, as always...🙂
I really hope you’re able to stay somewhere with some decent AC.
Honestly, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve thanked God for that machine... I truly think my mom wouldn't have made it without it.

Aside from that, things have taken a pretty significant turn for the worse. She’s been dealing with these intense headaches, and eating has become such an ordeal... just the other day, it took me over an hour and fifteen minutes just to get her to eat anything, and she kept pushing all the meat to the side of the plate... I didn't realize what was happening and she almost started choking, which was terrifying. I had to quickly clear everything out of her mouth with my fingers, but in the middle of it all, she bit down on my finger so hard I actually saw stars for a second. It’s just... it's incredibly bad. She sleeps constantly now, barely ever opens her eyes... I can't help but feel like a coma might be right around the corner.

I’m back too—it’s been a long time, really quite a while, ever since Mom’s condition started sliding... her hemoglobin levels were dangerously low, sitting somewhere around 50, so we took her in for a transfusion. She received it, but now the doctors are scratching their heads because her platelets have plummeted to barely 40... we brought her home and she seems a little more stable for now. Mostly, she can only handle purees or liquids, and her eyes stay closed most of the time... that's why I specifically wanted to reply to your comment, because the symptoms—especially this constant sleeping part—are identical to what we're seeing. We started giving her that BioBran we picked up in Washington, D.C., from that macrobiotic specialist over on Fifth Avenue... it’s about 10 bucks for a pack of 10, so keep that in mind if you're looking into it. Anyway, we'll just have to wait and see... last night she was moaning in pain, so we gave her the Trodon the doctors prescribed. I don't know, maybe she is approaching a coma too, but when I was massaging her and talking about all the things we’re going to do once she wakes up and "gets better," she suddenly opened her eyes wide... it almost looked like a smile to me. Eventually, I just sang some songs from her era to her, and she drifted back off. Ufffffff, sometimes I feel like I'm just going to snap!

How is everyone doing? Hope things are okay on your end!

Ryan Fisher64 said:I’m checking in too; I haven't been around for a while—actually, not since things started taking a turn for my mom. Her hemoglobin was bottoming out, sitting around 50, so we took her in for a transfusion. She got it, but now the doctors are scratching their heads because her platelets have plummeted to barely 40. We brought her home, and she seems a bit better for now. Mostly, she’ll only touch soft foods or liquids. Her eyes stay closed most of the time; she sleeps constantly, which is why I’m responding specifically to your comment—the symptoms, especially this heavy sleeping, are identical. We started giving her that BioBran we picked up in Washington, D.C., from that macrobiotic specialist over on Fifth Avenue—it was about 10 bucks for a pack of 10, so do the math. We'll just have to wait and see. Last night she was moaning in pain, so we gave her what the doctors prescribed, the Trodon. I don't know if she's drifting closer to a coma, but when I was massaging her and talking about all the things we’re going to do once she wakes up and "gets better," she suddenly popped her eyes wide open, and I swear it looked like a smile. Finally, I sang some songs from her era, and she drifted back off. Ufffffff, I feel like I'm about to snap!

How’s everyone doing? Hope things are looking up for you guys.

Have you guys run any more tests yet?
I am so incredibly sorry. I’m having a terrible day myself; I'm miserable and can't stop crying. On top of everything with my mom, my boyfriend and I are going through a nightmare. I honestly cannot believe how much I misjudged him.🙂 Out of everyone who turned their back on me, even my own father, he was the one standing by my side—and now it feels like I was wrong about him, too.