Dealing with an episiotomy: What to expect?

This post of yours:

Justin Fox said:Jose Miller3, I actually filed a complaint against you—asked for your moderator status to be stripped.
Crimson: I don't give a damn about your petty grammar corrections.
New Yorker, acting all high and mighty: if you can't handle being proven wrong about medical facts, stop quoting my posts. Go pick flowers or something. Your attacks on me are pathetic—if anyone here needs psychiatric help, you’re first in line. Learn how to admit when you're wrong. I don't care if you're a doctor; you aren't God.

And this post of yours:

Justin Fox said:Honey, you've lost the plot. What Nobel laureates? What Bauustell construction? Where is this nonsense coming from? I'm not selling anything. You clearly think I'm some nemesis from your past, but—get this—you're wrong again.

New Yorker is wrong? A doctor is wrong? Yeah, sure. Not the first time, either. They mess up, then try to mask it with arrogance and sheer emptiness just to maintain some imaginary sense of importance.

The rest of your posts are just all about you!!! 😬

The Diaspora = blue-collar workers

Justin Fox said:So this is how a certain New Yorker (an arrogant regular who posts constantly on the Health forum) views people living outside of America:

Long story short, she called me a laborer. I mentioned once that I don't live in the States, and she immediately painted a picture of some unrefined guy in a hard hat.

How do you guys deal with this kind of narrow-mindedness from folks back home?

Justin Fox,
stop dragging the Health Department into this; it has absolutely nothing to do with the Diaspora.
You weren't called a laborer like you're making it sound, but you did cross a line that most people on the Health forum wouldn't appreciate. Instead of letting it go, you're just pushing an unnecessary argument.

I’ve written a thousand posts on the Health forum and been called "boring" or "not this again,"
but everyone knows what I do for a living. No one ever claimed I didn't know what I was talking about, and nobody called me a laborer... though, honestly, if things had gone differently, I could have played the "steelworker" card myself.

As for the Doctor/Susan Martin24, she has a sense of humor and appreciates a good dark joke. On top of that, she's a surgeon now working in plastics... what more can you ask for? Though, maybe you should fix your avatar—your face isn't looking its best.

Let's not start digging at each other from one sub-forum to another.

P.S. That link from the Diaspora forum was shared over to Health... everyone has the right to know where people are talking about them.
No offense intended,
Jamie Clark74

Justin Fox said:Jose Miller3, I filed a complaint against you and requested your moderator status be revoked.
Megan Reed: I have zero interest in your petty grammar corrections.
New Yorker, an offended ego: if you can't handle being proven wrong about medical facts, stop quoting my posts. Go pick flowers or something. Your attacks on me are pathetic; if anyone here needs psychiatric help, you're first in line. Learn how to admit when you're wrong. I don't care that you're a doctor; you aren't God.

Fine. Then I, as a user, also have the right to complain about you insulting others just because they hold a different opinion. 🙂

Furthermore, this obsession with gynecology is becoming somewhat concerning, as is your advocacy for so-called "natural birth," which sounds more like the rhetoric of Jehovah's Witnesses. As a woman, I know that when I am eventually in a famous hospital delivery room, I want medical assistance to ensure everything goes as smoothly, painlessly, and quickly as possible. If that requires a small incision, so be it.

Two of my friends went through that process and didn't view it as some massive trauma, mainly because childbirth itself was painful enough that, like any normal woman, they wanted it over with as soon as possible.

As for the New Yorker, I think she's fair. I've read every one of her posts on the Health Department subforum with great interest. It’s nice to know that on this forum, one can actually get objective medical advice rather than just rambling about herbal supplements. 🙂

Justin Fox said:- tearing happens more often when pushing is forced. If labor progresses at a slower pace, following the woman's rhythm, and if the perineum is supported and lightly massaged, there is a lower chance of tearing.

- unfortunately, medical literature describes episiotomies as a good thing, but that is wrong. It's been proven in several clinical studies, yet those study results haven't made their way back into the mainstream literature.

Regarding the first point—that's incorrect. Massage doesn't help. If I recall correctly, this was published in the British Medical Journal based on research conducted in Australia.

As for the second point, it just doesn't make sense. 😵

Hey everyone, thanks so much for all the kind words.
Big shoutout to Jamie Clark74 for passing along that post from Justin Fox over on the Diaspora site.
Anyone who’s followed me around this Forum knows I usually stick to the Health and Beauty sections. As for the Diaspora crowd, I don't have any beef with them personally, but honestly, Justin Fox really outdid himself there... any praise being thrown his way is just a complete waste of breath.
Those of you who've been hanging around the Forum for a while probably know exactly who our resident "handyman" is: MacGregor (along with a bunch of his other handles over the years) is basically leading the charge here, headfirst and all. 😍

So, a quick public message for Justin Fox: man, you are just pathetic. It’s beyond repair at this point—you don't even need to bother trying to fix your reputation. No matter how much bitterness and venom you try to pour into your posts, they don't carry an ounce of weight with anyone sane. Amen. 🙂

And finally, instead of a thumbs up, let's go with: Justin Fox, :2up:

@ Susan Martin24
Don't let him get to you, honey. That guy clearly has some serious issues—honestly, everyone who's ever dealt with him has seen right through his act by now.
We need you, and we love you 🙂

Grace Jackson11 said:this guy is clearly struggling—everyone who's read him by now has already seen right through it.

The Forum really needs a disclaimer—stating that anyone reading Justin Fox's posts does so entirely at their own risk...🙂

Look, guys, "that guy" has every right to say whatever he wants on this Forum—whether it’s about episiotomies or anything else under the sun. You have a choice: you don't have to click on his threads. You know what he's going to talk about, just like I do.
So, it’s really not cool to jump into his discussions just to tell him he's crazy, obsessed, or whatever else... I’m going to make sure all his posts regarding those gynecological topics he's so fixated on end up in one specific spot, and anyone being abusive is getting banned. That's it. Just bypass him if you aren't interested in the subject matter of this thread, which is episiotomy, please...

This post is purely critical; he’s just venting his opinion and dropping links just so he can verbally crucify someone. It's absolutely disgraceful!

Chloe Gray12 said:It seems like you might have cut off your message mid-sentence. If you were trying to start a thought or ask a question, go ahead and finish it—I'm listening.iI don't know what you're trying to get at with that, but if you think being cryptic is going to earn you any traction here, you're sorely mistaken. It's just noise.

Chloe Gray12 said:And who exactly is going to step up and prove they're wrong? It’s like trying to find a needle in a haystack when you're just looking for a decent doctor.Is there anyone else out there actually paying attention to this? Doctor.

Are you actually related to Justin Fox or something? 🤣 ☕

Modesto said:I gave birth just eight days ago—specifically on Monday the 19th—at the hospital in Chicago.
And yes, I had an episiotomy, just like my first time.
I’m not sure how much authority any of us really have on specific medical topics (for instance, my sisters-in-law seem quite militant about certain things, and I find myself disagreeing with many of their stances), but I can certainly speak to my own experience. With my first baby, who was nearly five pounds, I had several stitches and it took about three weeks to recover. Now, this baby is almost four kilograms, I had a few stitches as well, and I can already say I’m sitting normally and getting through all my daily tasks. I haven't had any issues with my old scars, so I'm hoping I won't have any with this one either. For my first child, I had an epidural, but this one was unmedicated because I didn't even make it to the hospital until the contractions were coming every five minutes. The whole thing lasted about an hour.🙏 The actual stitching was 🙂 🙂, though the doctor went about it with the precision of someone preparing a masterpiece for an exhibition.😁
In my recovery room, there was a woman who suffered a severe tear during delivery, and her situation was nothing short of catastrophic. She couldn't even lift herself up; she could barely even turn onto her side. I truly felt for her. Her baby was relatively small, too. There was also a woman who wasn't cut at all (it seems like they don't just perform episiotomies by default at this hospital, but rather based on their assessment; though personally, I'd much rather be cut than end up like the woman with the tear), and since it was her second child, she was able to sit up perfectly fine, and frankly, I envied her for it.
So, my take is that we shouldn't perform episiotomies on every single woman, but then again, tearing is so easy to happen, and that is definitely not ideal.
A friend of mine tore badly, and now, ten years after giving birth, she still feels pains and tightness whenever the weather changes due to the uneven healing of the wound.
But hey, you be the wise one here.
However, if it isn't inexcusable that the hospital switched to cheap thread two months ago, resulting in nearly every postpartum nurse having to go in and remove stitches? That's just wrong.
As for working up to three days before labor and being expected back at work after only three weeks—in my opinion, that is absolutely terrifying. It's unfair to both the baby and the mother. From a purely medical standpoint, the postpartum period lasts forty-five days; that is how long it takes for the uterus to return to normal, so anything less is excessive. On the other hand, leaving a three-week-old baby without its mother (especially if the mother is breastfeeding) is simply foolish. Of course, I am not referring to those desperate cases where it's necessary for survival.
There is no job in the world worth leaving a newborn for. A baby needs its mother's milk, her words, and her embrace to develop properly.

This is such a fascinating discussion, I just wanted to share my own experiences with you all.
With my first birth, the baby was 3250g and I was cut; all my stitches tore, and I had a seven-week ordeal that I will never forget. With my second baby, 4000g, I wasn't cut and I didn't tear, and I was sitting normally within two days. Both births took place at the Mercy Hospital with only seventeen months between them, so you tell me which experience turned out better.

I haven't been through labor (God forbid), but I know they don't perform unnecessary surgeries at Mayo Clinic. Actually, why am I even weighing in... If this bothers you all that much, maybe just don't have kids or stay home like our great-grandmothers did.