Offside Chat Archives (2014-2021)

So, I'm hearing this second-hand from a colleague over in Germany who’s basically checking every single box for the Coronavirus—fever, sore throat, the whole bit... he might have been scrolling through ☕ yesterday.

1. His wife calls 911, and they basically tell her it's not an emergency because they're swamped with actual life-or-death situations. Their advice? Just grab an Uber and head to the hospital.

2. Then she calls the local Coronavirus Hotline, and they just tell her to stay home and self-isolate. She tries explaining that he's struggling to breathe and has been around tons of people at work lately, but they just brush it off, saying if it turns out to be the virus, everything will be handled and they'll track down his contacts. 🤣
When she asks how anyone can actually test him if nobody is coming to see him and he isn't allowed to leave, they just say someone will call her back later. 🤣

3. They try calling the Urgent Care clinic instead of emergency services, but they're told someone will get back to them when possible, noting they close at 8:00 PM.

4. Finally, after calling 911 again and emphasizing that he literally cannot breathe, they finally agree to send someone out. A crew shows up, takes his temperature, gives him some Tylenol, grabs a sample, and then just leaves. They told him to isolate 🤣 until they hear otherwise.

Honestly, it's starting to feel like this whole thing is just one big farce...

Are you all actually doing anything about this, or is there a reason why you aren't?

Anthony Wright30 said:Are you all actually doing anything about this, or is there a reason why you aren't?

Honestly, fucking is overrated, man. It's common knowledge...

Matthew Young35 said:By the way, this maniac was back at Mass again today.

The police probably didn't have a clue yet, either.

Furthermore, this was actually announced beforehand. It’s almost certain the patrol was stationed right at the main entrance, so they conveniently "forgot" to check the side entrances.

Matthew Young35 said:By the way, this maniac was back at Mass again today.

The police probably didn't have a clue yet, either.

neonfalcon16 said:Furthermore, this was actually announced beforehand. It’s almost certain the patrol was stationed right at the main entrance, so they conveniently "forgot" to check the side entrances.

For fuck's sake, they already posted this a few times. The inspector was actually out on the field during that open mission and stated that everyone was keeping their distance...
Do you guys at least bother to read the news before commenting on it?...

And here we go... get ready for the inevitable debate over some random image where everyone argues about whether there was a space or not. Three, two, one...

Susan Kim2 said:You can celebrate the Eucharist right in your own home, by yourself. You don't even need a TV or a radio for it. Another thing is that most believers are pretty uneducated, even regarding their own faith. The vast majority haven't even read the Bible, so it’s hardly surprising that some mentally unstable priest can easily manipulate such a small group of people.

Religion is the opium of the masses 🧐—of course, one doesn't strictly have to attend church, but then every priest would be out of a job...
Most of those attending Mass simply do so out of habit or tradition, just to see familiar faces before moving on with their day... and it is truly remarkable how much respect a local small-town priest commands within the community; he could practically kill someone and nobody would say a word.🙂

Anthony Wright30 said:Are you all actually doing anything about this, or is there a reason why you aren't?

Whatever, if it's gotta happen, it'll happen.

Paul Martinez73 said:For fuck's sake, they already posted this a few times. The inspector was actually out on the field during that open mission and stated that everyone was keeping their distance...
Do you guys at least bother to read the news before commenting on it?...

And here we go... get ready for the inevitable debate over some random image where everyone argues about whether there was a space or not. Three, two, one...

What I wanna know is: does the police force carry measuring tapes along with their batons and pepper spray?
Like they do at my construction site—you pull it out of your pocket, "Hey man, you're only 37 inches apart," and boom, you get a red card and a sticker.

Paul Martinez73 said:For fuck's sake, they already posted this a few times. The inspector was actually out on the field during that open mission and stated that everyone was keeping their distance...
Do you guys at least bother to read the news before commenting on it?...

And here we go... get ready for the inevitable debate over some random image where everyone argues about whether there was a space or not. Three, two, one...

By that logic, can we hold concerts if everyone keeps their distance? Can we do stand-up comedy? Can we go to the movies if there are three or four empty seats between people in both directions? Just call the police and let them verify that the distance is being kept. 🙂

You still haven't explained why the police aren't monitoring or enforcing anything during the second largest holiday of the year, even though the guy is constantly announcing when the mass will happen. Oh, right—if it didn't happen at eight, then it probably won't happen by the end of the day. Brilliant logic there. 👍

I thought you were actually in favor of following the regulations. And why on earth wasn't the mass shut down yesterday? Would any other gathering have been interrupted? Since when do Church laws carry more weight than state laws in a secular country? Especially when it comes to public health risks and violating mandates set by the national task force.

Looks like everyone’s obsessed with whining about 5G networks again. What a joke.

We love to sit here and mock Americans for being clueless, but honestly? Europeans aren't trailing behind by much.

Noah Perez2 said:Damn, what an absolute fortress you've built here. Respect. 🙏 🙏

Is it actually worth my time to slog through 50 pages of backlog? 🍿

It’s giving me major World War I vibes—sides switching three times already, just hero after hero clashing.

urbanhawk17 said:But that embankment is absolutely packed. I haven't seen that many people there in forever.

I haven't been to Jarun, or Maximilians, or Bundek, but if Rakitje was swarmed last week, I can only imagine what it's like over there.

I'm not judging, honestly. It's good that people are getting out, walking around; I think that's a positive thing. I just doubt this pace will continue once the bars and shopping malls reopen, though. Probably won't.

Right now, they've got nowhere else to go but outdoors, so that's that. Where else are the folks from Kvartrić supposed to go instead of Times Square? There isn't anywhere.

Small tangent here, but every day driving through downtown feels like a total dream. It’s pure fantasy. You’re cruising along Fifth Avenue, Vlaška, or Jurišić, maybe even cutting against the grain on Gaj or Masaryk, and you don't even have to wait for a green light because the streets are empty. It's beautiful. This is one of those rare moments—now or never.

Ryan Vaughn7 said:Small tangent here, but every day driving through downtown feels like a total dream. It’s pure fantasy. You’re cruising along Fifth Avenue, Vlaška, or Jurišić, maybe even cutting against the grain on Gaj or Masaryk, and you don't even have to wait for a green light because the streets are empty. It's beautiful. This is one of those rare moments—now or never.

Are you losing your mind?

Ryan Vaughn7 said:Small tangent here, but every day driving through downtown feels like a total dream. It’s pure fantasy. You’re cruising along Fifth Avenue, Vlaška, or Jurišić, maybe even cutting against the grain on Gaj or Masaryk, and you don't even have to wait for a green light because the streets are empty. It's beautiful. This is one of those rare moments—now or never.

Watch out for those taxis, though. Now that the downtown streets are emptier, they’re driving like they’re on a Formula 1 track. I was just chilling during my commute last week—riding that dream vibe to work—when some guy comes flying out of Vlaška at full speed into a turn. He nearly wiped me out.

Has anyone actually bothered to dig into Event 201? You know, that thing they held in New York City? What a massive "coincidence," right?

darkseal9 said:Whatever, if it's gotta happen, it'll happen.

What I wanna know is: does the police force carry measuring tapes along with their batons and pepper spray?
Like they do at my construction site—you pull it out of your pocket, "Hey man, you're only 37 inches apart," and boom, you get a red card and a sticker.

They seriously need to bring in VAR

For everyone missing their Sunday service because of the ban, you can just meditate on this few times a day.

Ryan Vaughn7 said:Small tangent here, but every day driving through downtown feels like a total dream. It’s pure fantasy. You’re cruising along Fifth Avenue, Vlaška, or Jurišić, maybe even cutting against the grain on Gaj or Masaryk, and you don't even have to wait for a green light because the streets are empty. It's beautiful. This is one of those rare moments—now or never.

That's the truth. Spot on.

But then you have those idiots who treat empty streets like their own personal drag strip; just last night, shortly before midnight, I had someone tearing past me on a bike near the old industrial district, easily pushing 150.

Paul Sanders5 said:It’s giving me major World War I vibes—sides switching three times already, just hero after hero clashing.

Heh, sounds like the sequel is coming soon enough.

The daily updates on infection numbers are starting to feel pretty thin at this point. Honestly, the government needs to step up and tell us: what’s actually the plan here?

It's a pretty realistic take on the situation, and while there isn't much of a clear strategy—or maybe they just aren't communicating it clearly enough—I honestly think it's the first one, because there just isn't a real long-term strategy in sight. I just really hope this doesn't turn into a total fiasco, which seems to be the standard way things play out around here.

I was moving a little too fast through this one, so I didn't quite catch who actually came out on top in the end—was it the reporter or the priest? What was the final verdict...