Caught completely off guard

Joseph Bailey41 said:That sounds like a smart move. You mentioned earlier that you're a bird lover—do you do any bird feeding? Any particular species you're most fond of?

I definitely do! :-)
I've got feeders all over my backyard—though I'll admit, I end up tossing some scraps to those pesky city pigeons too
My absolute favorites have to be crows—I just love them—but I'm also partial to magpies and jays

Pure melancholy.
Some people are just wired that way—honestly, I don't think there's any fixing it.
All that talk about "the creative process" and stuff? It’s just a bunch of mental gymnastics they use to justify being stuck in a rut.

restlessdriver said:I get the sense that a few people here have painted this guy as being deeply depressed or even suicidal. Honestly, I don't think that's quite right. He isn't more depressed than the average person... he just sounds disillusioned.

That’s just one side of the coin; he needs to find the other.

Someone who has focused intensely on their own niche interests, seen how the gears turn behind the scenes, can't just unsee it. You can't help him the way you're imagining. He has to find his own way through, just like the rest of us. It's exactly what he said: how can he be expected to help someone else if he hasn't figured himself out yet?

It makes sense why he’d avoid seeing a psychiatrist. After all, what is the point of psychiatry? To force a perspective back into socially acceptable boundaries. But he doesn't want to go back there, and frankly, he probably can't. There's a paradox in sending every deviation from the norm to a doctor—who gets to decide what the "true" perspective actually is?

The search lasts a lifetime, but if he keeps looking, he'll find it eventually...

I have a dog who is incredibly smart and sweet. Aside from the obvious bias, he really is the best dog I've ever known. But sometimes, he gets so profoundly sad... you know, when he looks at you with those soulful eyes that seem to reflect the entire hopelessness and futility of existence? That overwhelming cosmic melancholy? In those moments, you Must just toss him a piece of deli meat, because he truly looks like he hasn't eaten in a month.

Whenever there’s a neighborhood cookout or a block party, he shows up. He doesn't bark, he doesn't cause trouble, and he isn't annoying. He just sits there, looking mournful. It's impossible to stay indifferent; only a complete sociopath could deny him a bite of a burger, a slice of pizza, or some bacon... because it's the least we can do to soothe that endless, universal sorrow.

To be clear, he isn't neglected. He isn't "depressed." He goes on regular walks through the woods with us, sleeps in the bed, gets plenty of affection, loves his cats, and the kids absolutely adore him. Most of the time, he’s happy and upbeat. But there are those specific moments where only a completely heartless person could ignore his sadness.

Shallow, literal-minded people would say the clever pup just figured out a brilliant way to manipulate us for treats... but I simply refuse to believe that. ☕

Morgan Peterson6 said:they used to be here ages ago
and were such an active member

If he decides to return, we might be able to show him that the "absence of free will" isn't a depressing concept at all when viewed through the right lens. 🙂

Morgan Peterson6 said:He’s got a job, a family, and pets he absolutely adores—plus he squeezes in sports whenever he can.
He isn't some depressed guy walking around with a dark cloud over his head; you wouldn't even tell by talking to him—he laughs, he jokes...
I was talking to him yesterday, and when I told him he sounded depressed, he just said, "No, I'm just sad."
He says that after everything he's searched for, there's just this emptiness inside him.
There's nothing left to hold onto.
He just doesn't see the point in existing anymore.

He's really into that whole New Age thing—not like following gurus or those weird authors, but more about how we perceive our origins and where we go once we leave this dimension.
He thinks we're all just puppets in some kind of Matrix.
And honestly? That's what's killing him.

I don't know—I'm letting it go. I tried, but it's just not working.

I'm giving up.🙂

I don't even know why I started this thread. I care about him so much, but I just don't have the capacity to help him myself—our perspectives are worlds apart. Everything I say or offer as a solution just doesn't resonate with him because my idea of God and his idea of God are completely different... and frankly, I don't know anything about his version of God, and I'm not a fan of it either.

He Must shift his perspective. 🙂

What if purpose is found simply in the present moment—in being fully present and experiencing life to its absolute fullest? Perhaps he isn't here to reach some imaginary goal or future destination, but rather to experience the pure act of being in every passing second. 🙂

His perception of reality is unique and unrepeatable. While it may feel insignificant to him personally, it could be vital to existence itself. 🙂

Morgan Peterson6 said:I definitely do! :-)
I've got feeders all over my backyard—though I'll admit, I end up tossing some scraps to those pesky city pigeons too
My absolute favorites have to be crows—I just love them—but I'm also partial to magpies and jays

If I’m following you correctly... you sit there listening to his constant Gnostic rambling, try to bond with him by talking about your love for birds... and then Mr. Gloomy just dismisses you instantly with a "those are just programs"?

Maybe I’m being too impulsive or lacking empathy here... but if someone came at me with that kind of rudeness, I’d give them such a reality check they'd finally understand what it feels like to actually take flight. 🙂

Sorry, but to me, that just sounds like a total jerk. I mean, even birds might leave a mess on your balcony sometimes, but at least they’re pleasant to look at and better company than people like that.

Joseph Bailey41 said:I have a dog who is incredibly smart and sweet. Aside from the obvious bias, he really is the best dog I've ever known. But sometimes, he gets so profoundly sad... you know, when he looks at you with those soulful eyes that seem to reflect the entire hopelessness and futility of existence? That overwhelming cosmic melancholy? In those moments, you Must just toss him a piece of deli meat, because he truly looks like he hasn't eaten in a month.

Whenever there’s a neighborhood cookout or a block party, he shows up. He doesn't bark, he doesn't cause trouble, and he isn't annoying. He just sits there, looking mournful. It's impossible to stay indifferent; only a complete sociopath could deny him a bite of a burger, a slice of pizza, or some bacon... because it's the least we can do to soothe that endless, universal sorrow.

To be clear, he isn't neglected. He isn't "depressed." He goes on regular walks through the woods with us, sleeps in the bed, gets plenty of affection, loves his cats, and the kids absolutely adore him. Most of the time, he’s happy and upbeat. But there are those specific moments where only a completely heartless person could ignore his sadness.

Shallow, literal-minded people would say the clever pup just figured out a brilliant way to manipulate us for treats... but I simply refuse to believe that. ☕

oh my god😁🤣🕺

Joseph Bailey41 said:If I’m following you correctly... you sit there listening to his constant Gnostic rambling, try to bond with him by talking about your love for birds... and then Mr. Gloomy just dismisses you instantly with a "those are just programs"?

Maybe I’m being too impulsive or lacking empathy here... but if someone came at me with that kind of rudeness, I’d give them such a reality check they'd finally understand what it feels like to actually take flight. 🙂

Sorry, but to me, that just sounds like a total jerk. I mean, even birds might leave a mess on your balcony sometimes, but at least they’re pleasant to look at and better company than people like that.

A friend of mine (who used to be perfectly fine 😁 ) suddenly hit a crisis and started reading the Bible all day long. The last time I saw him, he was saying things like, "Everything is written in the Bible! We are sinners! We are evil! We deserve everything bad that happens to us! And worse! We deserve to suffer in hell!" No matter how much optimism or positivity I tried to offer, he would always find some dark counterpoint from the Bible to shut me down. We haven't seen each other since. 😁 I heard through a mutual friend that he has become so bleak that it's impossible to have a conversation with him anymore.

mistybison said:If he decides to return, we might be able to show him that the "absence of free will" isn't a depressing concept at all when viewed through the right lens. 🙂

He Must shift his perspective. 🙂

What if purpose is found simply in the present moment—in being fully present and experiencing life to its absolute fullest? Perhaps he isn't here to reach some imaginary goal or future destination, but rather to experience the pure act of being in every passing second. 🙂

His perception of reality is unique and unrepeatable. While it may feel insignificant to him personally, it could be vital to existence itself. 🙂

That’s exactly what I’m telling him—about listening to my own gut...
but it’s not working.

I've given up.
Now I just have to figure out how to let go and stop hurting just because he's hurting.
Honestly, I'd love to just pin him against a wall—(I actually could, he's way smaller than me! 🤣)—and yell, "Get it together, you ungrateful man!" 🕺
But I can't. :-/

Joseph Bailey41 said:If I’m following you correctly... you sit there listening to his constant Gnostic rambling, try to bond with him by talking about your love for birds... and then Mr. Gloomy just dismisses you instantly with a "those are just programs"?

Maybe I’m being too impulsive or lacking empathy here... but if someone came at me with that kind of rudeness, I’d give them such a reality check they'd finally understand what it feels like to actually take flight. 🙂

Sorry, but to me, that just sounds like a total jerk. I mean, even birds might leave a mess on your balcony sometimes, but at least they’re pleasant to look at and better company than people like that.

Man, this Gnostic rambling is just too much!😁
Well, we've definitely been talking about this lately—I feel like we're always circling back to it, right?
I don't hold it against him—honestly, that's just how his mind works—it's hard to get past that, you know?
He’s honestly way smarter than me—so when he starts laying out his arguments, I usually just shut up. It’s hard to argue when everything I feel intuitively, deep down in my soul, is just... programmed logic to him, you know?
Unlike him, I'm incredibly intuitive—I really rely on my gut feeling to guide me through things. Don't you just love that inner compass?
It’s all just some big program to him—just those New Age theories about us being nothing more than puppets for some higher entities? Is he serious?
It really isn't garbage—honestly!
So she basically decided to play hero and take it upon herself to "help" him—which means I guess I'm the only jerk in this whole situation?

Morgan Peterson6 said:Man, this Gnostic rambling is just too much!😁
Well, we've definitely been talking about this lately—I feel like we're always circling back to it, right?
I don't hold it against him—honestly, that's just how his mind works—it's hard to get past that, you know?
He’s honestly way smarter than me—so when he starts laying out his arguments, I usually just shut up. It’s hard to argue when everything I feel intuitively, deep down in my soul, is just... programmed logic to him, you know?
Unlike him, I'm incredibly intuitive—I really rely on my gut feeling to guide me through things. Don't you just love that inner compass?
It’s all just some big program to him—just those New Age theories about us being nothing more than puppets for some higher entities? Is he serious?
It really isn't garbage—honestly!
So she basically decided to play hero and take it upon herself to "help" him—which means I guess I'm the only jerk in this whole situation?

The official forum term for you would be a 'doormat.' 🕺

Besides, negative entities are getting pretty out on the New Jersey scene. From what I've heard lately, they've all hopped into their spaceships and headed straight into the fog because earthly vibrations are rising so fast that even the lizard people and their crowd just can't handle it anymore. 😁

Morgan Peterson6 As stated by:
That is exactly what I tell him—there are times when you just have to trust your own gut.
There is simply no effect.

That means they aren't looking for any help.

You simply cannot help an adult if they aren't willing to accept your assistance.

A friend I mentioned before—the one who started reading the Bible and turned quite dark—didn't strike me at all as someone seeking help to escape that gloom during our conversation. On the contrary, he seemed like someone who had embraced the darkness as the absolute truth and was actively trying to pull others down with him. Because of that, I decided to distance myself immediately.

I have decided to step away.
Now I just need to figure out how to let this go without causing him any unnecessary pain.
I would love to pin him against the wall—and honestly, I could, since he’s quite a bit smaller than me.🤣Oh, please, get it together. You're being ungrateful.🕺
I simply cannot.

If you truly want to make an impact, there are much more effective ways to lend a hand, such as volunteering. People will be incredibly grateful for that kind of dedicated support.

Morgan Peterson6 said:Man, this Gnostic rambling is just too much!😁
Well, we've definitely been talking about this lately—I feel like we're always circling back to it, right?
I don't hold it against him—honestly, that's just how his mind works—it's hard to get past that, you know?
He’s honestly way smarter than me—so when he starts laying out his arguments, I usually just shut up. It’s hard to argue when everything I feel intuitively, deep down in my soul, is just... programmed logic to him, you know?
Unlike him, I'm incredibly intuitive—I really rely on my gut feeling to guide me through things. Don't you just love that inner compass?
It’s all just some big program to him—just those New Age theories about us being nothing more than puppets for some higher entities? Is he serious?
It really isn't garbage—honestly!
So she basically decided to play hero and take it upon herself to "help" him—which means I guess I'm the only jerk in this whole situation?

Look, you aren't a jerk or some kind of villain. It’s actually a good thing that you care about your friend and want to lend a hand. Honestly, you probably did help him; sometimes just showing up and letting a friend vent is enough to make an impact.
But don't let it go on forever.

There's a chance the guy isn't even depressed or miserable. He might just be sitting there theorizing about the meaning of life, and because you're taking it all so seriously, you're attaching this heavy, negative weight to the conversation. He’s playing with ideas intellectually, while you're processing it all emotionally. For him, it might just be a passing thought, one small part of his day—especially since it seems like he only talks like this with you.

Then again, maybe he really is just a total mess who finally found someone willing to put up with him. 🤣

Anyway, stop beating yourself up and focus on yourself for a bit. 🙂

Joseph Bailey41 said:The official forum term for you would be a 'doormat.' 🕺

Besides, negative entities are getting pretty out on the New Jersey scene. From what I've heard lately, they've all hopped into their spaceships and headed straight into the fog because earthly vibrations are rising so fast that even the lizard people and their crowd just can't handle it anymore. 😁

So there's an actual official title for it? Not exactly something I'd call a shoulder to cry on, I gotta admit...
we're saved🎉

Austin Hughes2 said:Look, you aren't a jerk or some kind of villain. It’s actually a good thing that you care about your friend and want to lend a hand. Honestly, you probably did help him; sometimes just showing up and letting a friend vent is enough to make an impact.
But don't let it go on forever.

There's a chance the guy isn't even depressed or miserable. He might just be sitting there theorizing about the meaning of life, and because you're taking it all so seriously, you're attaching this heavy, negative weight to the conversation. He’s playing with ideas intellectually, while you're processing it all emotionally. For him, it might just be a passing thought, one small part of his day—especially since it seems like he only talks like this with you.

Then again, maybe he really is just a total mess who finally found someone willing to put up with him. 🤣

Anyway, stop beating yourself up and focus on yourself for a bit. 🙂

Yeah, that's true.

Now I'm gonna go be annoyingly happy and super inspired—he really messed up.🕺
I'll be over it soon.🤣

And aren't you just the one who's going to work him to death in the first place...🤔

rustymaker5 said:And aren't you just the one who's going to work him to death in the first place...🤔

chill :-)
just messing around--😁

thanks for all the comments! 🙂
as far as I'm concerned, feel free to lock this thread

If you can't get a psychiatrist to help, just try letting an adult tiger loose in the room with them. If they make it out alive, their existential pseudo-philosophizing will basically just be shouting into the void. ☕ 🙄

On a serious note, I have to agree with Enchi—if someone doesn't think they have a problem and refuses to seek help, there isn't much else anyone can do.

What your friend has embraced is conscious suffering. There’s a purpose to it, which sets it apart from the random, mindless misery we often struggle against without any control...

Conscious suffering drives personal growth because it's the only thing that actually forces a person to do the Work. If you don't recognize the flaws in the life you're leading, or if you can't see why transformation is necessary, you'll just stay stuck. It's as simple as that.

Ultimately, a person can only perceive as much as their current state allows. Eventually, they might find their way...

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy Z Flip using Reddit

She basically said she’s already made up her mind, so there’s really no point in anyone else trying to weigh in...

🙂

Morgan Peterson6 said:Oh, he definitely appreciates it! :-)

I would argue he is just manipulating your emotions.