People who just have "that certain something" and magnetic energy

Oh, absolutely! Moving up the ladder and seeing all these new things pop up really gets the creative juices flowing, which just makes life feel so much more vibrant and fast-paced, don't you think?

I find this whole thread pretty hilarious because I’ll say one thing and then immediately get contradicted, haha. Look, that’s just MY take, period. You can try all you want to be "top tier" by forcing people to notice you or trying to manufacture a vibe through sheer willpower. I’m not saying you won't see progress by working on yourself, but if you think you can just study charisma like a textbook? Not gonna happen. So, go ahead—try to play it without constantly pushing back against everyone else and let us know how that works out for you. There's a huge difference between being someone who works on themselves and actually being charismatic. Good luck.

Carl Rivera43 said:@Peter Murphy6

Man, I’ve definitely had those moments where I thought about just expecting absolutely nothing from life. But honestly? That feels a little too pessimistic for me.

When it comes to love, I don't buy the idea that unrequited feelings are always because you don't love yourself enough. Isn't it more likely that emotions just get way too intense sometimes? You fail, it hurts, and suddenly you start putting someone on a pedestal. It’s all just this messy, complicated cycle—kind of like a circus, right?

I rarely take big risks. And even when I do? Usually, it just ends in disappointment, which makes me lean back toward my pessimistic side.

@Jeffrey Ramos4

What makes death feel just?

Let's say—and we can never know for sure—that death is a finality. For now, at least. In the future, maybe things will be different, but that’s a whole other conversation... If death is truly the end, then it represents a total severance of the life path for anyone who views their existence through a lens of negativity, constant suffering, or pure misery.

Peter Murphy6 said:Can you walk me through how the multi-quota thing works?
Alright, let me break down what I was actually getting at with some examples.
Ego (the bad kind)—saying stuff like, "I'm such an amazing cook, everyone raves about my food."
Reality—that same person cooks just okay, doesn't even enjoy it, doesn't have the drive, and barely tries... mostly because they aren't even that good at it. But instead of admitting that to themselves, they opt for that first statement. In my book, that’s evaluating yourself through the lens of ego (the toxic version).
Value—looking objectively at your actual skills and what you can really do. Ego shouldn't play any part here, whether we're talking healthy or unhealthy. To me, a healthy ego shows up when you show yourself love based on a realistic view of who you are as a person in relation to yourself and others... acknowledging your flaws and actually accepting them.
That cooking example could be swapped out for anything—knowing how to love someone or any other core value that makes a person who they are. A healthy, self-aware person.
So, in my head, it's split into two types of ego, which is why I didn't dive deeper since there wasn't much else to say.
And honestly, I see valuing others as a tool—a way to step outside your own ego. But the question is, which "others" are we talking about, and how objectively are they looking at me? Like, are they measuring me against their own standards? Do you really think it's possible to be objective about yourself without some outside perspective "interfering"?

As for the other part... I thought it was pretty obvious that there are layers to love beyond just "romantic partner" stuff. That's been logical to me since I was a kid—I guess I just assumed everyone saw it that way. I never specifically said "romantic love," I just said love. I haven't overvalued any specific type, and sex is driven by instinct, so it's not even in the same conversation. Especially since everyone's libido is different, so your take on that is purely subjective.
Unloved kids might have friends, maybe a grandma or grandpa. Older folks might have people in their lives too—do I really need to go into more detail than that?
Bottom line: if you have absolutely no one on this planet that you want to love, or anyone who loves you back, is it even possible to live unselfishly?

Objectivity is possible, sure. But let's be real—it isn't always achievable, especially when you consider how much things shift from one moment to the next... even when you're facing the exact same situation twice.
But if we’re actually aiming to build some kind of collective society, then we have to start by acknowledging and weighing how other people perceive our own... I guess I'll start... This was one of the first steps...
What does that mean? To love... Is that right?

Richard Wells said:Alright... let's set a baseline here. My bad for missing that, haha

So, you decided this morning that you're just gonna start glowing and have the whole city notice you all at once? I'm dying to see if it actually works 😁

...or maybe just some string lights from a hardware store if all else fails... 😂

Jeffrey Ramos4 said:Let's say—and we can never know for sure—that death is a finality. For now, at least. In the future, maybe things will be different, but that’s a whole other conversation... If death is truly the end, then it represents a total severance of the life path for anyone who views their existence through a lens of negativity, constant suffering, or pure misery.

Objectivity is possible, sure. But let's be real—it isn't always achievable, especially when you consider how much things shift from one moment to the next... even when you're facing the exact same situation twice.
But if we’re actually aiming to build some kind of collective society, then we have to start by acknowledging and weighing how other people perceive our own... I guess I'll start... This was one of the first steps...
What does that mean? To love... Is that right?

...or maybe just some string lights from a hardware store if all else fails... 😂

I cleaned up your post a little bit. Hope you aren't mad. It's actually pretty good.

Richard Wells said:I find this whole thread pretty hilarious because I’ll say one thing and then immediately get contradicted, haha. Look, that’s just MY take, period. You can try all you want to be "top tier" by forcing people to notice you or trying to manufacture a vibe through sheer willpower. I’m not saying you won't see progress by working on yourself, but if you think you can just study charisma like a textbook? Not gonna happen. So, go ahead—try to play it without constantly pushing back against everyone else and let us know how that works out for you. There's a huge difference between being someone who works on themselves and actually being charismatic. Good luck.

But charisma isn't some programmed, robotic thing. And since I'm definitely not a robot, I truly believe I can develop charisma. {Maybe I already have a bit of it, and honestly, I'm just glad I'm dedicated enough to keep working on myself)

Some people are just born with it—it's like finding raw diamonds in the wild. And if they happen to be smart? Well, they know how to polish those traits until they’re absolute showstoppers 😉

I'm a living, breathing example of that crowd (the extroverts). Plus, nature decided to bless me with a few extra * awesome and highly sought-after qualities along the way.
Both adults and kids—even animals—just seem to gravitate toward me 😉

My person couldn't even wrap her head around it. Like, whenever we hit up a big party or a wedding, most of the women would end up hanging out around me because I love to chat and crack jokes—something a lot of them really vibe with 😉—and my ex was absolutely fuming with jealousy 🤣

Whoa, hold up! No need to jump down my throat, guys—I never said I was being humble, I was just answering the OP's questions 😛 😁

If someone is just born an introvert, it's pretty tough for them to pick up that "magnetic" quality that pulls people in. Don't get me wrong, people will still hang out with them, but they won't necessarily be the ones everyone is drawn to.

*-that said, there are definitely folks who aren't fans of extroverts, but they can still respect other great qualities if the person has them.