Religion classes in school - Megathread

Tyler Ruiz502 said:

I honestly can't even begin to wrap my head around how some people operate—it’s just... it's baffling, really. I was sitting there thinking about it earlier, and it just strikes me as such a bizarre way to approach things. It's like people just decide to be completely nonsensical without a second thought. Anyway, I don't know, maybe I'm just overthinking it—which, let's face it, is a chronic problem for me—but there's definitely something fundamentally off about that whole vibe. Just totally out there. Tyler Ruiz502 says:
Oh, good grief.🤦
If that actually made you happy...👍

There we go. 😬 If you’re actually feeling some sort of satisfaction from being completely blindsided—well, honestly, I’m just glad I could be the one to make it happen for you. 🤣

So, thanks for that.

Tyler Ruiz502 said:Look, they had every single required detail and they handed it in right on schedule, so it was totally valid. But honestly? Just out of pure principle, I refused to call it a "request"—I don't feel like I have anyone to ask permission from. I just titled it: "Subject: Withdrawal from Religious Studies."

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Well, if you aren't asking for a favor, then you should definitely get that withdrawal processed 🤣
Daily prayer is pretty much the core of religious education classes 😬

So, you're pulling your kid out? Did she just not enjoy the class, or is there something else going on...?

Well, she basically said she wasn't interested and that it sounded boring. We signed her up just so she could see what it was all about—mission accomplished, I guess. We actually had a chance to chat for a bit; we touched on why some people bother going to church and why we don't. We even drifted into whether ghosts exist or if the dead actually go to heaven.

I have to admit, I’m a little disappointed we didn't get into the heavier stuff—you know, things like sin and divine retribution. 😬

Switching from one elective to another is perfectly doable and happens all the time; it’s standard procedure because we have to prioritize what the students actually need, and frankly, it's their right. There aren't any bureaucratic hurdles stopping anyone who wants to make a change for whatever reason.

What frupy was getting at is that it would be a huge help if those requests (or formal petitions 🙂) were turned in as early as possible, just so we can actually get the master schedule sorted out and distribute it.

But hey, obviously, students have until August 15th to make their move.

And sometimes waiting until the last minute backfires. 🙂 I remember a time when I waited too long and ended up with a total mess of a schedule—barely any classes left to pick from. Nobody stepped in to look out for me. So, please don't go implying that the faculty is intentionally ignoring student interests.

My daughter is a first grader, and she’s officially opting out of religious education. When I asked her about it, she was pretty blunt: she just doesn't want to go.

A psychologist mentioned that the teacher will be sending out a survey at the start of the school year to see which parents want their kids enrolled in religion classes or not. It felt a little strange to me that they don't collect this data sooner, but hey, I suppose they know how the system works.

Jack Gray6 said:My daughter is a first grader, and she’s officially opting out of religious education. When I asked her about it, she was pretty blunt: she just doesn't want to go.

A psychologist mentioned that the teacher will be sending out a survey at the start of the school year to see which parents want their kids enrolled in religion classes or not. It felt a little strange to me that they don't collect this data sooner, but hey, I suppose they know how the system works.

Wait, didn't you guys get a form to sign during enrollment where you check off which electives you want?
That seems a bit strange to me.

If there isn't any other reason, it might just be because of how the textbooks are ordered. 🤔

They can just grab them later if they need to. We actually asked everyone during enrollment and on the first day of school just in case anyone changed their minds.

I was just reading somewhere that they moved the confirmation ceremony from 8th grade to sophomore year of high school.
Is that actually true, and since when? I’m assuming you still have to show up for religion class at the church this year too, right?

Aaron Scott45 said:I was just reading somewhere that they moved the confirmation ceremony from 8th grade to sophomore year of high school.
Is that actually true, and since when? I’m assuming you still have to show up for religion class at the church this year too, right?

I honestly have no clue.
Last year the kids were in 8th grade, and I remember those little debates about rock music versus religious education.

But my guess is that more students are signing up for ethics classes, so they might be trying to encourage them toward religious studies in high school to prevent losing those instructional hours in some schools.
For someone who is truly devout, it shouldn't really matter if Communion happens in 8th grade or during their first year of high school—going to church for religious ed should feel like a natural part of life, not a chore.
Unless, of course, someone decides not to go to high school (since it isn't mandatory here), then I'm not sure how they'd manage both the church and school requirements.🤔

In California, high schoolers usually wrap up their finals during their sophomore year, whereas in all the other counties, they finish them back in eighth grade.

I wrote that myself, purely making stuff up.

It’s got nothing to do with the County. I’m writing this from the perspective of someone who has actually been there—I spent five years attending three different First Communions at my local middle school. The rules were always identical: you had to bring physical proof from the school, including certificates of communion, and the godparents had to provide documentation too. And naturally, $33 regarding the costs.

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It really just comes down to how many people are actually looking for them. In the city, you’ll usually see them pop up at the local high school every year, but out in the rural counties, things are way more unpredictable—they might show up earlier or much later depending on when enough folks finally get together to make it worth the effort.

Mad Hatter said:they shouldn't have to ask for consent every single year.
It’s just this one year where they're asking for everything at once, because it wasn't handled this way before. Previously, kids were enrolled in religion via a parent's verbal statement during registration, and for things like German or computer science, it was a mix of a survey and buying the textbooks—you check the box on the form, show up in September with the books, and if you don't have them, you're out. Now, they're demanding parents explicitly provide a consent form for elective courses.
After that, enrollment is automatic every year until someone formally requests a withdrawal following standard legal procedure.
Any school deviating from this is breaking the law.

Do both parents need to sign the consent form? Does any regulation actually state that both parents must agree on an elective? Or is one signature enough if it's based on the child's best interests?

The father claims that for religious education, both parents must agree. Especially if they are divorced.
He is strictly against it, while I would prefer the child to attend. What am I supposed to do in front of the school? I'd rather not involve the local police unless absolutely necessary. And I definitely don't want the school forcing my hand.

wanderinghawk30 said:The legal guardian signs off. That religious education waiver is basically just a permission slip saying the kid can go on the field trip. It’s the parent handling all the school logistics who provides the signatures.

It’s different. For a field trip, you sign one group consent form for the whole class. Religious ed requires an individual waiver for every single student. Plus, there's zero transparency when parents disagree. From what I've seen, kids with divorced parents usually don't end up in those classes anyway.

Peter Harris80 said:It’s different. For a field trip, you sign one group consent form for the whole class. Religious ed requires an individual waiver for every single student. Plus, there's zero transparency when parents disagree. From what I've seen, kids with divorced parents usually don't end up in those classes anyway.

I never said the paperwork was identical; I meant they carry equal weight. (Even for a field trip, my kid's school sends home a specific form for me to sign—there aren't any "group slips" at my kid's school.) Look, I’m just reporting what they asked me for and what I actually signed. My ex hasn't been contacted about anything once. (The only exception was at the police station while sorting out some legal docs for my kid, but never anything else.)

As for whether you agree or not on your kid attending religious classes—that's out of my lane. For everyone's sake, especially the kid's, it's in your best interest to be on the same page. Being able to settle things without drama or involving the courts... well, even a bird could tell you that.
Good luck.

wanderinghawk30 said:I never said the paperwork was identical; I meant they carry equal weight. (Even for a field trip, my kid's school sends home a specific form for me to sign—there aren't any "group slips" at my kid's school.) Look, I’m just reporting what they asked me for and what I actually signed. My ex hasn't been contacted about anything once. (The only exception was at the police station while sorting out some legal docs for my kid, but never anything else.)

As for whether you agree or not on your kid attending religious classes—that's out of my lane. For everyone's sake, especially the kid's, it's in your best interest to be on the same page. Being able to settle things without drama or involving the courts... well, even a bird could tell you that.
Good luck.

It's a mixed bag. But clearly, it varies by school district; you see one mom mention they aren't divorced, so they both had to sign a single form. It seems like every school handles this differently. It would be helpful if someone dropped a link to the official district regulations. That might clear things up.

Peter Harris80 said:Do both parents need to sign the consent form? Does any regulation actually state that both parents must agree on an elective? Or is one signature enough if it's based on the child's best interests?

The father claims that for religious education, both parents must agree. Especially if they are divorced.
He is strictly against it, while I would prefer the child to attend. What am I supposed to do in front of the school? I'd rather not involve the local police unless absolutely necessary. And I definitely don't want the school forcing my hand.

Before you two keep arguing over what should happen with religious ed, did either of you even bother asking the kid what they actually want? 🤔

Maria Gray3 said:Before you two keep arguing over what should happen with religious ed, did either of you even bother asking the kid what they actually want? 🤔

How do you even bring up the topic of religious education with a preschooler? I was thinking about asking my little one if they’d want to take those classes once they start elementary school, but I'm honestly not sure how to frame it. It feels like such a big question for someone who is still busy mastering finger painting! Any advice on how to approach this gently?
What else is he supposed to know? Unless, of course, one of his best friends is heading that way too.
If a parent—say, a mom—isn't able to make it to church every single Sunday with their child, I think it’s really important for her to sit down with the dad and explain that she’s still actively raising the little one with those core values in mind. It might help to frame religious education classes as a great way to supplement what they're learning at home, rather than just another chore. It’s all about keeping that spiritual foundation strong together.

Honestly, I think it would be a really smart move if they handled this through the Coast Guard by using a mediation process instead.

I’m guessing the school is asking for dual parental consent because they got burned before. It sounds like they probably dealt with a situation where only one parent gave permission without looping the other one in, and then that parent ended up being used as leverage in a courtroom battle against the other. Typical legal headache!
That can be a really tricky area to navigate. When things get split up like that, communication tends to go all over the place, which makes everything much more complicated. Honestly, I can see why a school would want to steer clear of that mess; they usually try to play it safe by requiring double consent just to cover all their bases.

We both signed off on the photography release back when all those new CCPA regulations first kicked in.

Susan James said:How do you even bring up the topic of religious education with a preschooler? I was thinking about asking my little one if they’d want to take those classes once they start elementary school, but I'm honestly not sure how to frame it. It feels like such a big question for someone who is still busy mastering finger painting! Any advice on how to approach this gently?
What else is he supposed to know? Unless, of course, one of his best friends is heading that way too.
If a parent—say, a mom—isn't able to make it to church every single Sunday with their child, I think it’s really important for her to sit down with the dad and explain that she’s still actively raising the little one with those core values in mind. It might help to frame religious education classes as a great way to supplement what they're learning at home, rather than just another chore. It’s all about keeping that spiritual foundation strong together.

Honestly, I think it would be a really smart move if they handled this through the Coast Guard by using a mediation process instead.

I’m guessing the school is asking for dual parental consent because they got burned before. It sounds like they probably dealt with a situation where only one parent gave permission without looping the other one in, and then that parent ended up being used as leverage in a courtroom battle against the other. Typical legal headache!
That can be a really tricky area to navigate. When things get split up like that, communication tends to go all over the place, which makes everything much more complicated. Honestly, I can see why a school would want to steer clear of that mess; they usually try to play it safe by requiring double consent just to cover all their bases.

We both signed off on the photography release back when all those new CCPA regulations first kicked in.

I don't really get why you wouldn't ask a six-year-old if they want to attend religious classes. It’s like asking if they want to do ballet or learn Italian; you're probably going to push them into it or tell them no regardless. My own parents—mom was religious, dad was an atheist—asked me about twenty years ago, so it seems strange to me that people today would rather fight it out through the Coast Guard than just see what the kid actually thinks or feels about it.

Maria Gray3 said:I don't really get why you wouldn't ask a six-year-old if they want to attend religious classes. It’s like asking if they want to do ballet or learn Italian; you're probably going to push them into it or tell them no regardless. My own parents—mom was religious, dad was an atheist—asked me about twenty years ago, so it seems strange to me that people today would rather fight it out through the Coast Guard than just see what the kid actually thinks or feels about it.

Go ahead, ask a six-year-old what religion class even is—not whether they want to go, but what it *is*—and then tell me how that goes.