Attachment and Suffering

Maria Robinson2 said:And you know how it goes—people call those who are "free" slaves to one thing or another. I might agree to a point, but... these aren't exactly shackles you can just slip off whenever you feel like it.

Humans get tied to things globally before they even realize they're connected. Still, I often find myself thinking about that old saying, "bad company ruins good character." I guess I've heard enough about human suffering, so I figured we might as well flip the script—see if there's anything else out there. If there happens to be something positive, we might as well focus on that.

Well, if you get what I mean, you get it.

Freedom is when you actually understand what it means—and that's not easy. It's a whole process, starting psychologically and then moving into the mystical stuff. I get it pretty well, but I'm still stuck in the matrix like everyone else... one day, though, I'll live entirely on my own terms.

Bad company is bad, I'm with you there. Everyone's always trying to force their will on someone else and draining your energy.

Life is positive—how could it not be? Dissatisfaction is just part of being alive (doesn't mean you have to be depressed or pessimistic or whatever). You can aim for something positive without it needing to be some big "faith" or "hope" thing... just find the action, the drive, the life in it, and go.

Thomas Nelson25 said:Freedom is when you actually understand what it means—and that's not easy. It's a whole process, starting psychologically and then moving into the mystical stuff. I get it pretty well, but I'm still stuck in the matrix like everyone else... one day, though, I'll live entirely on my own terms.

Bad company is bad, I'm with you there. Everyone's always trying to force their will on someone else and draining your energy.

Life is positive—how could it not be? Dissatisfaction is just part of being alive (doesn't mean you have to be depressed or pessimistic or whatever). You can aim for something positive without it needing to be some big "faith" or "hope" thing... just find the action, the drive, the life in it, and go.

In short, how would you define freedom?

Not to make it sound like "we'll find activity within dissatisfaction and draw positive energy from there"—sorry, that sounds like some sci-fi movie plot where they don't actually "feed" on it, or maybe they do?

Speaking of sci-fi scenarios, I mentioned once that vampires actually have to eat; they aren't just the ones you see in movies. Some people caught my drift, others didn't—do you get what I'm getting at with that comparison?

Maria Robinson2 said:In short, how would you define freedom?

Not to make it sound like "we'll find activity within dissatisfaction and draw positive energy from there"—sorry, that sounds like some sci-fi movie plot where they don't actually "feed" on it, or maybe they do?

Speaking of sci-fi scenarios, I mentioned once that vampires actually have to eat; they aren't just the ones you see in movies. Some people caught my drift, others didn't—do you get what I'm getting at with that comparison?

flying... and trust me, that's not just a throwaway phrase.

Whether it's through struggle or pure joy—that's what drives me. It fuels my will, my creativity, the urge to build things... negativity is just stagnation, and honestly, that's never been my style.

Yeah, I definitely get what you mean.

Thomas Nelson25 said:flying... and trust me, that's not just a throwaway phrase.

Whether it's through struggle or pure joy—that's what drives me. It fuels my will, my creativity, the urge to build things... negativity is just stagnation, and honestly, that's never been my style.

Yeah, I definitely get what you mean.

"Flying" is such a glamorous concept—though, I suppose, not everyone is actually cut out for it—especially when that sudden urge to take off stems from pure dissatisfaction.
I suppose.
The entire Earth is restless—everyone seems dissatisfied, and I guess there are very few happy people left on it—if such people even exist anymore—and most folks just want to change that status quo as fast as they can.

As for spirituality... maybe. 🙂

Maria Robinson2 said:"Flying" is such a glamorous concept—though, I suppose, not everyone is actually cut out for it—especially when that sudden urge to take off stems from pure dissatisfaction.
I suppose.
The entire Earth is restless—everyone seems dissatisfied, and I guess there are very few happy people left on it—if such people even exist anymore—and most folks just want to change that status quo as fast as they can.

As for spirituality... maybe. 🙂

that drive to fly comes from freedom, not being unhappy... the world is actually great, it's just people who are usually hell on earth... let's be real about that.

Buddhism (and Western existentialism, too) just calls it like it is. 😉

Thomas Nelson25 said:that drive to fly comes from freedom, not being unhappy... the world is actually great, it's just people who are usually hell on earth... let's be real about that.

Buddhism (and Western existentialism, too) just calls it like it is. 😉

It would be rather strange of me to deny that certain individuals have created hell on Earth.
But,
do we really need Buddhism to realize that?

Maria Robinson2 said:It would be rather strange of me to deny that certain individuals have created hell on Earth.
But,
do we really need Buddhism to realize that?

Do we need crosses hanging in every government building just to recognize that life is full of suffering and injustice?

And honestly, do we even need religion to teach us how to live our lives?

wearyowl29 said:Do we need crosses hanging in every government building just to recognize that life is full of suffering and injustice?

And honestly, do we even need religion to teach us how to live our lives?

We need it. We need it to make sense of the sheer absurdity of life—how one thing says one thing, another thing does the exact opposite, and a third thing thinks something else entirely.

Michael Gonzalez77 said:We need it. We need it to make sense of the sheer absurdity of life—how one thing says one thing, another thing does the exact opposite, and a third thing thinks something else entirely.

It’s almost like life itself isn't already doing a pretty great job of advertising its own craziness...🤣

Honestly, there's a certain level of absurdity in thinking you actually need someone to explain absurdity to you while being absolutely absurd yourself!😁

wearyowl29 said:It’s almost like life itself isn't already doing a pretty great job of advertising its own craziness...🤣

Honestly, there's a certain level of absurdity in thinking you actually need someone to explain absurdity to you while being absolutely absurd yourself!😁

I was only joking. 🙂

Look, at the end of the day, we don't actually experience "life" outside of our own heads. We never truly feel anything beyond our own senses. In that sense, we’re talking about the exact same thing—I was only joking, but I bet you feel the same way. 😁

Maria Robinson2 said:It would be rather strange of me to deny that certain individuals have created hell on Earth.
But,
do we really need Buddhism to realize that?

Nietzsche called it the will of the weak—just a mindless herd.

Michael Gonzalez77 said:I was only joking. 🙂

Look, at the end of the day, we don't actually experience "life" outside of our own heads. We never truly feel anything beyond our own senses. In that sense, we’re talking about the exact same thing—I was only joking, but I bet you feel the same way. 😁

Looks like my joke mode is officially turned off today...😵

Thomas Nelson25 said:Nietzsche called it the will of the weak—just a mindless herd.

Well, I guess Nietzsche didn't know much about the Herd then.

You know—you were just another part of that global herd yourself, though you probably never cared to admit it.

So, what now? 🙂

Maria Robinson2 said:Well, I guess Nietzsche didn't know much about the Herd then.

You know—you were just another part of that global herd yourself, though you probably never cared to admit it.

So, what now? 🙂

Nothing much—we'll just go back to "loving one another like..." 😉

The herd... anyway, how do you explain the crisis facing Christianity and the West right now? (If we're forcing this whole superego/morality thing but getting nothing but backlash, then what kind of religion is it even?)

The man was a bit of a troubled philosopher-psychologist, really. He claimed "God is dead" and predicted that the future of America and the rest of the world would fall into nihilism—which pretty much happened—and that an "overman" would eventually emerge from the wreckage.

Justin Garcia7 said:Some people say you shouldn't get attached to anything you're afraid of losing.☕

We feel the sting when we leave a job we actually loved, when a relationship ends, or whenever we lose anyone or anything we were emotionally invested in.

Buddhism suggests that life itself is suffering because we are beings driven by desires—which cause pain—and fueled by emotions that lead to even more attachment.

So, what’s the actual lesson here?

How do we avoid getting attached to people or things? Is it even possible to remain completely detached? Maybe it all comes down to how we frame things in our minds—our perception of what we hold dear. Or should we just let logic override our feelings?

Is the "right" way to be empathetic without letting ourselves become overly emotional?

I’ve noticed something interesting about some elderly, deeply religious folks I've met—people who carry their prayer beads everywhere. They’ve outlived their own children, yet they don't seem to grieve with the overwhelming intensity a "typical" person might. It's almost as if they possess this profound sense of peace, fully aware of how fleeting life is.

But would that mean happiness and laughter are just the flip side of the coin? We know many famous comedians struggle with depression behind closed doors. Should we spend our lives in an emotional "flatline," avoiding the highs and lows? Is a state of total emotional neutrality the only way to truly grasp the Truth?

I’m not sure if it’s actually possible, but honestly, I think trying would be a mistake. What would be the point of living? Just counting down the years?

The only thing I’ve consciously decided to avoid getting attached to—just so I wouldn't have to deal with the heartache—is pets. I don't want a dog just to suffer through the grief when they're gone. But that's something I could walk away from relatively easily without feeling like my entire quality of life had collapsed. Avoiding attachment to people to bypass pain seems, in my view, to carry far more negatives than positives.

For instance, I've noticed something interesting about older, deeply religious folks who carry their prayer beads around all day... they've outlived their own children, yet none of them seem to grieve in the way a "normal" person would. It's as if they are acutely aware of how fleeting life is; there's this certain sense of peace about them.

I suspect the emphasis here is on the religion itself. From what I can gather, religious people in those situations aren't even supposed to question God's will, so by extension, they probably shouldn't mourn too much either. To me, it feels like it stems from fear—fear that if they do complain, something even worse might happen. I might be wrong, but that's the phenomenon I've observed, consistently, whenever I encounter intensely religious people.

Thomas Nelson25 said:Nothing much—we'll just go back to "loving one another like..." 😉

The herd... anyway, how do you explain the crisis facing Christianity and the West right now? (If we're forcing this whole superego/morality thing but getting nothing but backlash, then what kind of religion is it even?)

The man was a bit of a troubled philosopher-psychologist, really. He claimed "God is dead" and predicted that the future of America and the rest of the world would fall into nihilism—which pretty much happened—and that an "overman" would eventually emerge from the wreckage.

I'm not talking about Christianity in the West, the East, or anywhere else... in fact, I wasn't even talking about Christianity specifically, but rather a world that acts as a religion whenever it mistakenly thinks it isn't one.

Nietzsche was what you described—and an egocentrist at that—and people like him easily convince themselves they are charismatic leaders the world will follow. If the world has a low opinion of itself, it’s free to follow those global charlatans, but let's not forget that they too will receive their 'paycheck' based on their own labor—as it's said on Judgment Day.

So, yeah... that's the gist of it regarding these so-called 'supermen.'

Maria Robinson2 said:I'm not talking about Christianity in the West, the East, or anywhere else... in fact, I wasn't even talking about Christianity specifically, but rather a world that acts as a religion whenever it mistakenly thinks it isn't one.

Nietzsche was what you described—and an egocentrist at that—and people like him easily convince themselves they are charismatic leaders the world will follow. If the world has a low opinion of itself, it’s free to follow those global charlatans, but let's not forget that they too will receive their 'paycheck' based on their own labor—as it's said on Judgment Day.

So, yeah... that's the gist of it regarding these so-called 'supermen.'

The guy's got serious willpower—he's basically the future of this country.

wearyowl29 said:Do we need crosses hanging in every government building just to recognize that life is full of suffering and injustice?

And honestly, do we even need religion to teach us how to live our lives?

Oh, please... look, as long as you’re carrying all that misery around in your own head, it’s going to exist in the world—because the world is basically just an extension of what's happening inside your skull. Don't you people see that you are the literal source of your "self," which then creates your version of the world, the pain... everything you love or hate? In one single moment, the suffering is there, and in the next, it's gone. You're basically just chasing your own tail...

ambereagle642 said:Oh, please... look, as long as you’re carrying all that misery around in your own head, it’s going to exist in the world—because the world is basically just an extension of what's happening inside your skull. Don't you people see that you are the literal source of your "self," which then creates your version of the world, the pain... everything you love or hate? In one single moment, the suffering is there, and in the next, it's gone. You're basically just chasing your own tail...

And why on earth are you worrying about what's going on inside my head?🙏

This is such a deep topic to dive into👍

I honestly feel like you just have to live your life, and honestly, it’s only natural for any human being to form these deep bonds—whether it's with another person, your hometown, certain hobbies, friends, or even your career. You shouldn't stress about those attachments, just like you shouldn't beat yourself up over feeling sad when you're far away from the people or places you love.

What we probably need to work on overcoming is that sense of ownership in any capacity. We own material things, sure, but all of that can be stripped away or lost overnight. When you start embracing how fleeting life really is and realize how little control we actually have over our circumstances, I think it gets easier to deal with the fear of suffering because you learn to look inward and shift how you react to everything.

The author mentioned older folks who went through some seriously rough times but didn't let it break them, and I've always found people like that so fascinating. They're the ones who have truly figured out the "why" behind existence and carry this deep sense of faith. They have this incredible calm because they've tapped into something spiritual. In this material world, there are zero guarantees; your car might break down, your house could face issues, or trends will change, but that inner strength? You can only find that by looking within yourself.