School closures/delays?

Brian Barnes5 said:frozenrider15, what’s the deal with the reading list for first graders? Are they supposed to tackle those books solo and actually grasp the plot? Give us a recommendation if you can, and how much time are they usually given per book?
My neighbors—well, the parents next door—are totally losing it over the required reading list. But then I heard one of the picture books is "Petra," which honestly sounds like a blast and a pretty chill way to kick things off. 🤷

First Grade Reading List:
The first required reading book happens in January, once the kids have mastered all the printed letters—both upper and lowercase—so they can actually navigate a book. This usually hits toward the end of January. In our local school district, teachers typically assign the reading during the last week of the month, sometimes even the very last day.
The kid needs to read the book, but for this first assignment, they don't write anything in a notebook; instead, they process it together with the teacher in class. They pull out the title, the author, and the characters (or main protagonists) and draw them. Everything is done under the teacher's guidance—they write it all on the board, and the students copy it into their notebooks.
For the second book, the kids read at home again, but they follow the same pattern as before: they jot down those key details in their notebooks. Some teachers don't even ask for that; they just discuss the book in class again and check if it was actually read through quick questions, either written or oral.

Our first-grade reading schedule looks like this:
JANUARY: Horvat-Vukelja, Z. - Brave February

FEBRUARY: Bauer, L. - Three Bears and a Guitar

APRIL: Grimm - fairy tale (selection)

MAY: Sigsgaard, J. - Alone in the World
Elective reading:
1. Petra learns to swim
2. 2. Baron, J. Baptist - Figaro, the Snoring Cat
3. 3. Djokovic-Pongrasic, A. - You Have No Idea, Grizlijan
4. Grizlijan 4. Junakovic, S. - S. - home, Sweet S. - home
5. 5. Zubovic, Sonya - How to Look at the Alphabet
6. 6. Femenic, S. - Go and See

And look, the reading list isn't some monster under the bed. It’s not a nightmare. These are short little booklets that aren't a struggle to read alongside your child; the goal isn't to read *to* them, but to monitor their progress and make sure they're actually absorbing the story.

I’m counting on her daycare teachers to find a spot for her and, more importantly, make sure she isn't just sitting there staring at the wall. She won't start kindergarten until she's about 7 and a half. Honestly, that feels a bit late to me. I was born just a few days apart from my peer group, and I started school at 6 and a half. I turned out perfectly fine. Nothing went wrong.
But I have zero intention of pushing her too hard right now. The caregivers at her preschool are incredible—truly top-tier—so she’ll stay in their mixed-age group for a while longer. My hope is that this extra time helps her build some backbone and learn how to stand her ground. Right now, she’s painfully shy and lacks any real sense of confidence.

My little one is five now, which means she’ll likely be headed to kindergarten once she hits six and a half. Honestly, unlike what most people seem to think, I feel like adding an extra year of preschool on top of that would just be a total waste of her time. Besides, elementary school these days is only a few hours long, so she’ll still have plenty of time to just go out and play.

I still remember my own first grade being incredibly tedious because I already knew everything they were teaching. Even the grades following that felt way too easy, and now I’m reading that they’ve actually reduced the curriculum even further. I suspect she’ll find it pretty boring too—just like I did—especially since I started school at six and a half myself.

I grew up in a small town, so this whole idea that a kid should only be in school for half the day—whether they're 6 or 7—just doesn't compute for me. Honestly, I don't think either age group is ready to just sit around the house all afternoon 🤷 where I live, for instance, that’s pretty much unheard of

Around here, teachers working with those first graders in the full-day programs are legally required to hand them off to an adult at dismissal—they aren't just letting them wander out alone, obviously. Like my little neighbor, he heads straight to daycare after school and his parents grab him on their way home from work, though some families rely on grandparents instead

Now, if a child is hyperactive—you know, has diagnosed ADHD or focus issues—or if they’re lagging behind in speech development, those aren't just excuses to skip the full school day. But that’s stuff a specialist will catch; I'm not talking about the initial admissions interview, but an actual professional who monitors their progress and can properly evaluate if the kid can actually handle the curriculum

Besides, if a 6-year-old can't sit still for long periods right now, that doesn't mean they won't be able to in six months. Kids grow—they evolve—and when they're encouraged, they learn how to handle new boundaries

Some of the reasons moms give, like "he's not emotionally mature enough," just sound a bit overprotective to me... it's hard to pin down what that even means. I mean, I haven't exactly reached "emotional maturity" for my age yet either🤣 some people are just wired that way🤷

Brian Barnes5 said:So, what kind of criteria are they actually using during these interviews? It feels like trying to measure the ocean with a teaspoon when you're attempting to judge something as layered and complex as whether a kid is truly ready to hit the classroom.
Just because a little one isn't emotionally primed for kindergarten at six and a half doesn't mean there's anything wrong with their development.
We all want to make the absolute best call for our kids, but honestly, if I'm going to miss the mark, I’d much rather be "wrong" by letting them have a boring extra year of playing than being "wrong" by throwing them into the deep end where they're expected to perform tasks they can't grasp, leaving them feeling totally overwhelmed and defeated.

Signed,
By the way, I honestly think any child can learn to read, write, do math, or memorize the seasons and months by age four, five, six, or seven if they get enough practice.

To me, the most important thing is that a child develops a genuine hunger for learning. They should be curious, learning through play (which is basically their full-time job!), and figuring out how to handle both wins and losses. It's about giving them space to express their feelings and thoughts while also learning how to respect others.
Before I send my kid off to tackle academic facts, I really want them to know how to stand up for themselves, resolve conflicts, take responsibility for their own stuff, cross the street safely, and maybe even grab something at the grocery store.

Honestly, between the rigid structure of school and the way some parents take over homework—doing the work *for* the kid instead of *with* them—it feels like the system is practically designed to kill a child's natural drive to learn. That's why I feel it's so important to wait as long as possible, especially if the little one is still deeply in that playful phase.
Of course, if they aren't being drilled with worksheets in preschool, then the timing matters a bit less...

@pink, you didn't mention—what does he actually think about school? Does he even realize what it is or what happens there? Does he show any interest in going, or does he ever engage in pretend "school" play?

Susan James said:Signed,
By the way, I honestly think any child can learn to read, write, do math, or memorize the seasons and months by age four, five, six, or seven if they get enough practice.

To me, the most important thing is that a child develops a genuine hunger for learning. They should be curious, learning through play (which is basically their full-time job!), and figuring out how to handle both wins and losses. It's about giving them space to express their feelings and thoughts while also learning how to respect others.
Before I send my kid off to tackle academic facts, I really want them to know how to stand up for themselves, resolve conflicts, take responsibility for their own stuff, cross the street safely, and maybe even grab something at the grocery store.

Honestly, between the rigid structure of school and the way some parents take over homework—doing the work *for* the kid instead of *with* them—it feels like the system is practically designed to kill a child's natural drive to learn. That's why I feel it's so important to wait as long as possible, especially if the little one is still deeply in that playful phase.
Of course, if they aren't being drilled with worksheets in preschool, then the timing matters a bit less...

@pink, you didn't mention—what does he actually think about school? Does he even realize what it is or what happens there? Does he show any interest in going, or does he ever engage in pretend "school" play?

I don't remember much about preschool, but I know for a fact my teachers labeled me the most social kid in class. Because of that, at age six, I was actually the one pushing to start elementary school. I was eager to learn, work, and make friends—I couldn't wait. (Worst decision ever.) My school was marketed as a "non-violence" zone. I stayed focused in class and pulled straight A's without trying. Socially, however, I was a target. Being the youngest and physically small, I was bullied constantly, which wrecked my self-esteem. My classmates were true sociopaths; they were smart enough to hide their bullying from teachers and parents, while threatening me that if I told anyone, I'd be finished. I did tell my parents, and after a parent-teacher conference, things would be quiet for a bit, only for the beatings to resume a week or two later. Eventually, my older brother settled it once and for all by physically taking those bullies to task. In that specific case, force solved the issue because no one touched me again. So, to parents out there: based on my own experience, maybe don't rush a six-year-old into school. Most of the "friends" I made were just kids a grade below me, and I felt like I belonged better there. Then again, violence might not have been the answer if a school psychologist had actually done their job. This isn't a universal rule, as schools vary, but I should note that this particular school was highly rated and located right in downtown Chicago. I won't name names. Peace!

So, I actually started school when I was only six, even though my birthday is in April, and since three other kids in my apartment building were starting that year too, my parents just kind of lumped me in with them. Honestly, back then I could already read and I was pretty much a little adult—I’d be home by myself all the time, heating up my own meals, waking myself up, the whole nine yards. Everything was totally fine through those first four grades, and I felt right at home with the older kids, but things got seriously awkward once fifth grade hit and puberty decided to show up. That one-year head start suddenly felt like a massive gap because I was physically way behind everyone else, which was honestly such a nightmare (like, I didn't even get my period until later, and my chest didn't even start developing until eighth grade), so there were definitely moments where I cursed my parents for sending me to school early, even if I don't really regret it now. And man, I still remember how much it sucked when everyone else turned sixteen and finally got permission to hang out past eleven at night while I was stuck being sent home like a little kid 😁

The bullying definitely ramped up by the time I hit fourth grade. Back then, I mostly hung out with the girls in my class. In fifth grade, a new kid transferred in from another school, and we hit it off immediately—we’re actually still friends to this day. While things got a bit more intense from fifth through eighth grade, it was easier to stand my ground knowing I had a real friend in my corner. 🙂

nosorog, he’s actually super engaged, you know? He’s constantly filling out these little worksheets with me and showing interest—sometimes even too much, if I’m being honest. He loves it when I read to him, explain things, or give him little challenges to solve.
He’s already decided he’s going to school, though; he’s spending the whole summer at our beach house and then heading straight into class this fall, or at least that’s what he tells everyone. The preschool psychologist actually mentioned that intellectually, he’s performing right at a seven-year-old level, but emotionally and socially? He’s just not there yet. That’s why I was leaning toward holding him back for another year. Look, I’m no expert, I’m just a total worrier, and I honestly thought he might struggle to fit in 🤷

blindiran, I honestly have no idea how your experience even relates to what we’re talking about here. Like, does it really matter that you were the youngest in your class? My husband started school about six or seven months early, and he never dealt with any bullying—there were always kids even younger than him in the mix. Meanwhile, I knew one kid who was the oldest in his group and he was basically a walking target for teasing.
It feels pretty stupid to generalize everything, doesn't it? And I have to say, kids these days seem way more brutal than they used to be.

The only thing I can think of that might actually mess with him is what ethan brought up—that stuff about hearing things from friends later on once puberty hits and everything gets complicated...

Richard Morris43 said:nosorog, he’s actually super engaged, you know? He’s constantly filling out these little worksheets with me and showing interest—sometimes even too much, if I’m being honest. He loves it when I read to him, explain things, or give him little challenges to solve.
He’s already decided he’s going to school, though; he’s spending the whole summer at our beach house and then heading straight into class this fall, or at least that’s what he tells everyone. The preschool psychologist actually mentioned that intellectually, he’s performing right at a seven-year-old level, but emotionally and socially? He’s just not there yet. That’s why I was leaning toward holding him back for another year. Look, I’m no expert, I’m just a total worrier, and I honestly thought he might struggle to fit in 🤷

blindiran, I honestly have no idea how your experience even relates to what we’re talking about here. Like, does it really matter that you were the youngest in your class? My husband started school about six or seven months early, and he never dealt with any bullying—there were always kids even younger than him in the mix. Meanwhile, I knew one kid who was the oldest in his group and he was basically a walking target for teasing.
It feels pretty stupid to generalize everything, doesn't it? And I have to say, kids these days seem way more brutal than they used to be.

The only thing I can think of that might actually mess with him is what ethan brought up—that stuff about hearing things from friends later on once puberty hits and everything gets complicated...

If he’s genuinely eager for school and the professionals have given him the thumbs up on his intellectual, emotional, and social readiness, then honestly? This is likely just your own anxiety talking. 🙂.
Not knowing how to tie his shoes is a non-issue. What *is* an issue is whether he can stay home alone if you don't have childcare lined up after school or if there isn't an after-school program available.
I suspect he’ll find his tribe eventually. It doesn't matter if he's shy or the life of the party; kids find their way.
That’s my struggle with my daughter, though. She’s incredibly timid, but lately, I’ve been wondering if my perception is skewed. Her teachers adore her, she has friends, and she plays with them—even if she occasionally tells me she didn't talk to anyone all day... but I still worry her social skills are underdeveloped. I fear the first grade might just swallow her whole if she starts this fall. The truth is probably somewhere in the gray area.

As for puberty, boys generally lag behind girls. They hit pre-puberty around 9 or 10, but actual puberty comes a bit later, around 11 or 12. But looking at my girl... she’s already taller and heavier than average. If she starts school at 7 and a half, she’ll be able to carry an average first grader in her teeth. (That's why I don't lose sleep over the weight of a school backpack 😁). Physically, she’ll hit puberty early, but whether her emotional maturity keeps pace is the real question.

Pink, I think generalizing like that is a bit much, especially since the whole point of this discussion is weighing whether it’s better to wait or just go for it.
It's kind of like trying to predict when a kid will hit their growth spurt; you can't exactly put a date on it because everyone develops on their own timeline, so worrying about specific ages right now feels way too early.
Plus, what blindiran mentioned really hits the nail on the head for me. A kid might be totally ready on paper, like passing a standardized test, but they might not be socially or emotionally prepared in the real world—and honestly, that's something only a parent can truly sense, not some evaluator at a clinic.

Brian Barnes5 said:Pink, I think generalizing like that is a bit much, especially since the whole point of this discussion is weighing whether it’s better to wait or just go for it.
It's kind of like trying to predict when a kid will hit their growth spurt; you can't exactly put a date on it because everyone develops on their own timeline, so worrying about specific ages right now feels way too early.
Plus, what blindiran mentioned really hits the nail on the head for me. A kid might be totally ready on paper, like passing a standardized test, but they might not be socially or emotionally prepared in the real world—and honestly, that's something only a parent can truly sense, not some evaluator at a clinic.

I have to disagree with the notion that victims of bullying are simply kids lacking social skills. Bullying isn't always about a lack of competence; kids target other kids for all sorts of petty, irrational reasons—differences that might seem invisible to anyone else. The real failure is when children don't know how to deflect the blow. But let's be adults here: the systemic failure lies with the guardians and institutions meant to protect them. We can't just dump the entire burden on kids who, let's face it, are often physically or psychologically incapable of defending themselves against relentless verbal or physical onslaughts.

The conversation has veered off course again... I'm done.

frozenrider15 said:I have to disagree with the notion that victims of bullying are simply kids lacking social skills. Bullying isn't always about a lack of competence; kids target other kids for all sorts of petty, irrational reasons—differences that might seem invisible to anyone else. The real failure is when children don't know how to deflect the blow. But let's be adults here: the systemic failure lies with the guardians and institutions meant to protect them. We can't just dump the entire burden on kids who, let's face it, are often physically or psychologically incapable of defending themselves against relentless verbal or physical onslaughts.

The conversation has veered off course again... I'm done.

Well, yeah, those are exactly the kind of social skills being discussed here.

rowdypanther12 said:Well, yeah, those are exactly the kind of social skills being discussed here.

Fine, social skills include that. But are we seriously suggesting the entire burden falls on children to just "figure it out" when things get ugly? We’re talking about bullying here! It shouldn't be up to a kid to navigate harassment alone. It’s on the adults to step in and stop the bleeding. The system has failed miserably. If this were happening to my daughter, believe me, I would fight tooth and nail to shake the system up until the abuse stopped. My son wouldn't even wait for a teacher to intervene; he'd be out there handling it himself because nobody else showed up to help.

The way I see it, if she doesn't change—and let's be honest, character is hardwired—she’s going to be a walking target for bullies. 😢

Edit: Honestly, even I don't know how I'd handle being bullied. Let's face it, I haven't exactly mastered "social maturity" either.😢

Richard Morris43 said:nosorog, he’s actually super engaged, you know? He’s constantly filling out these little worksheets with me and showing interest—sometimes even too much, if I’m being honest. He loves it when I read to him, explain things, or give him little challenges to solve.
He’s already decided he’s going to school, though; he’s spending the whole summer at our beach house and then heading straight into class this fall, or at least that’s what he tells everyone. The preschool psychologist actually mentioned that intellectually, he’s performing right at a seven-year-old level, but emotionally and socially? He’s just not there yet. That’s why I was leaning toward holding him back for another year. Look, I’m no expert, I’m just a total worrier, and I honestly thought he might struggle to fit in 🤷

blindiran, I honestly have no idea how your experience even relates to what we’re talking about here. Like, does it really matter that you were the youngest in your class? My husband started school about six or seven months early, and he never dealt with any bullying—there were always kids even younger than him in the mix. Meanwhile, I knew one kid who was the oldest in his group and he was basically a walking target for teasing.
It feels pretty stupid to generalize everything, doesn't it? And I have to say, kids these days seem way more brutal than they used to be.

The only thing I can think of that might actually mess with him is what ethan brought up—that stuff about hearing things from friends later on once puberty hits and everything gets complicated...

unknown? 😕

Rachel Jones8 said:unknown? 😕

No, the point was he’s considered fully mature across the board. She was just spiraling, worried about his emotional and mental stability, so she actually asked for a delay before they even ran the tests.

Of course, it all comes down to the kid—their mental and emotional maturity matters most—but just looking at it on the surface, starting first grade any later than seven feels way too late to me.
My brother started at six, I started at six, then five... I guess that's how I handled things.
I messed up my choice of major at the end of high school and ended up losing a year, but honestly, nobody can tell at my age. It was actually kind of great because during job interviews, it always looked like I finished college right on schedule, even though I’d fallen behind by a year. It's not a big deal, just an observation.
The real issue is that it would have been a nightmare if I had started at seven and a half because of how I looked physically. Back then, I was a head taller than everyone else; I would have looked like a complete freak if I had entered first grade at seven and a half.
At that stage, I was growing like a weed, and a single year made a massive difference in my size.
Not to mention, I was intellectually more than ready; reading and writing were a total piece of cake for me.

Richard Morris43 said:nosorog, he’s actually super engaged, you know? He’s constantly filling out these little worksheets with me and showing interest—sometimes even too much, if I’m being honest. He loves it when I read to him, explain things, or give him little challenges to solve.
He’s already decided he’s going to school, though; he’s spending the whole summer at our beach house and then heading straight into class this fall, or at least that’s what he tells everyone. The preschool psychologist actually mentioned that intellectually, he’s performing right at a seven-year-old level, but emotionally and socially? He’s just not there yet. That’s why I was leaning toward holding him back for another year. Look, I’m no expert, I’m just a total worrier, and I honestly thought he might struggle to fit in 🤷

blindiran, I honestly have no idea how your experience even relates to what we’re talking about here. Like, does it really matter that you were the youngest in your class? My husband started school about six or seven months early, and he never dealt with any bullying—there were always kids even younger than him in the mix. Meanwhile, I knew one kid who was the oldest in his group and he was basically a walking target for teasing.
It feels pretty stupid to generalize everything, doesn't it? And I have to say, kids these days seem way more brutal than they used to be.

The only thing I can think of that might actually mess with him is what ethan brought up—that stuff about hearing things from friends later on once puberty hits and everything gets complicated...

To be honest, I’m a little confused about why you're worrying so much about enrollment and whether he'll fit in.
At first, I thought you were questioning the professional assessment, because, well, you know your own kid best, and you felt certain he wasn't socially or emotionally ready for a classroom setting.
But now you're saying he’s super eager to tackle tasks, that his intellect is ahead of the curve according to the experts, and that he’s actually looking forward to starting.
So, I guess, why on earth would you want to keep him in preschool for another full year?😕

Sorry, I think I got a bit lost somewhere in your previous posts.😵

urbantinker8 said:To be honest, I’m a little confused about why you're worrying so much about enrollment and whether he'll fit in.
At first, I thought you were questioning the professional assessment, because, well, you know your own kid best, and you felt certain he wasn't socially or emotionally ready for a classroom setting.
But now you're saying he’s super eager to tackle tasks, that his intellect is ahead of the curve according to the experts, and that he’s actually looking forward to starting.
So, I guess, why on earth would you want to keep him in preschool for another full year?😕

Sorry, I think I got a bit lost somewhere in your previous posts.😵

And trust me on this one, I really do😵 :panic-mode:

Honestly, so many people just flat-out ignore what the experts say, and they'll tell me that every single kid is somehow "ready" whenever it suits them.

Richard Morris43 said:And trust me on this one, I really do😵 :panic-mode:

Honestly, so many people just flat-out ignore what the experts say, and they'll tell me that every single kid is somehow "ready" whenever it suits them.

Don't sweat it too much.
I mean, if the teacher is actually decent, everything will probably turn out just fine.😉