For kids of religious fanatics

gentlefalcon said:How is it not? If people are trying to force me to sit in church pews, observe religious holidays, and go through confession, then it's religious.
It isn't a topic for psychology either, I'm certain of that; I’d appreciate being placed in the appropriate section, because I don't feel comfortable under the umbrella of psychology—I feel labeled and judged there.

So, if a child refuses to go somewhere, they must have a psychological issue. That's the logic, right?
The word "psyche" comes from the Greek for soul. My situation is being imposed from the outside; it doesn't originate from my own inner self. I would much rather be over in the Religion subforum than in Psychology.
I am asking to be moved back to Religion, because psychology is a science that deals with the human interior, whereas religious topics can't fall under science since they are rooted in faith. At the very least, put me under Spirituality. Labeling people like this just triggers a backlash in me. This kind of labeling is one of the evils of the 21st century. 👍

It feels as though my path is predetermined and others get to dictate where I belong.

"You have to go to school, you have to go to Church, you have to get vaccinated at school, you have to eat leeks, you have to shower regularly, you have to go to the Psychology forum"—it's a vicious circle, if you ask me. 🙂

NO, it isn't a topic for Religion, because everything coming out of your posts points to a psychological issue regarding your relationship with your parent(s)—regardless of the cause.
Your mother's religious beliefs—or her fanaticism—aren't the subject of discussion within the scope of the Religion forum, unless she herself brings them up because she wants to discuss them from a standpoint of faith.

You should honestly just be grateful you get to live under her roof for this long. (I mean, if someone handed me a thousand bucks for absolutely nothing, damn 😲 )
You’re self-aware enough to realize you aren't going to swallow someone else's opinions just to accommodate them, nor will you let them force their belief system on you.
Getting into constant battles with your mother is a complete waste of energy because you simply cannot change people; she is going to remain exactly who she is forever. She doesn't realize that, unfortunately, but there isn't a single thing you can do about it. 😁
Therefore, the only logical course of action is to refuse to let her get under your skin, stop letting her irritate you, strip her behavior of any significance, and just focus on living your life in total comfort.

...Alternatively, you could actually grow up, take some responsibility, become independent, build a life of your own, and quit all this childish maneuvering. 😁

gentlefalcon, I felt for you during those first few posts since I’ve dealt with religious fanatics myself, but honestly, those arguments just get tedious after a while. It’s exhausting and won't hold water anywhere. 😁

gentlefalcon said:How is it not? If people are trying to force me to sit in church pews, observe religious holidays, and go through confession, then it's religious.
It isn't a topic for psychology either, I'm certain of that; I’d appreciate being placed in the appropriate section, because I don't feel comfortable under the umbrella of psychology—I feel labeled and judged there.

So, if a child refuses to go somewhere, they must have a psychological issue. That's the logic, right?
The word "psyche" comes from the Greek for soul. My situation is being imposed from the outside; it doesn't originate from my own inner self. I would much rather be over in the Religion subforum than in Psychology.
I am asking to be moved back to Religion, because psychology is a science that deals with the human interior, whereas religious topics can't fall under science since they are rooted in faith. At the very least, put me under Spirituality. Labeling people like this just triggers a backlash in me. This kind of labeling is one of the evils of the 21st century. 👍

It feels as though my path is predetermined and others get to dictate where I belong.

"You have to go to school, you have to go to Church, you have to get vaccinated at school, you have to eat leeks, you have to shower regularly, you have to go to the Psychology forum"—it's a vicious circle, if you ask me. 🙂

You always have a choice. You can grow up and stop acting like a baby, but I guess that's not really your style, so why not just keep whining? 😁

Chris Peterson53 said:🙂
If I were in your position, I’d certainly give some thought to the kind of advice you're handing out here.
The reality is simple: regardless of whatever issue is at hand or what the circumstances are, a 23-year-old is perfectly capable of leaving their parents' house and putting in the work to survive on their own.
And frankly, it doesn't matter whether they have an apartment waiting for them, whether they need to work to make ends meet, or if they have to sacrifice certain luxuries along the way.
Thousands of college students and young adults prove every single day that this is entirely doable!
Independence—or even the desire for it—hasn't actually been expressed by the OP based on everything they've written so far.
It seems to me that the mother's religious fanaticism is nothing more than a convenient excuse for the author to avoid taking charge of their own life!

That's some pretty "helpful" advice—why not just suggest forty years in a federal penitentiary instead? That sounds much more pleasant than dealing with Mom's zealotry. 🤣
At twenty-three, my only way to make ends meet would probably be scavenging aluminum cans for pennies. ☕
And those thousands of students you mentioned? Most of them are sitting around waiting for a transfer from Chase or Bank of America just to stay afloat. It's a stretch to call that "surviving." But then again, people used to find ways to scrape by somehow.
Right now, independence isn't even really on my radar, so you've got a point there.😍 I'd much rather focus on achieving some level of intellectual and emotional freedom, free from everyone else's constant interference.

dustysailor9 said:gentlefalcon, I felt for you during those first few posts since I’ve dealt with religious fanatics myself, but honestly, those arguments just get tedious after a while. It’s exhausting and won't hold water anywhere. 😁

What else was I supposed to mention?
Look, it's obviously a chore to drag yourself to service every single Sunday and go through all the motions. I don't have any beef with the Church or people who believe, period. My main issue is simply that the whole routine feels repetitive and draining—it’s about the boredom of the ritual, not some deep-seated atheism or animosity toward believers.
The truth is, it’s just tedious, and I much prefer sleeping in on Sunday mornings. 🤣

Paul Davis51 said:You should honestly just be grateful you get to live under her roof for this long. (I mean, if someone handed me a thousand bucks for absolutely nothing, damn 😲 )
You’re self-aware enough to realize you aren't going to swallow someone else's opinions just to accommodate them, nor will you let them force their belief system on you.
Getting into constant battles with your mother is a complete waste of energy because you simply cannot change people; she is going to remain exactly who she is forever. She doesn't realize that, unfortunately, but there isn't a single thing you can do about it. 😁
Therefore, the only logical course of action is to refuse to let her get under your skin, stop letting her irritate you, strip her behavior of any significance, and just focus on living your life in total comfort.

...Alternatively, you could actually grow up, take some responsibility, become independent, build a life of your own, and quit all this childish maneuvering. 😁

Look, there are plenty of thirty-year-olds still living at home, dragging out their college years until they're twenty-seven or twenty-eight while "searching" for a career. 🤣
I don't understand why Mom thinks she can just mold me into her perfect little version of a person. ☕
If the rule is that you can't change people, then logically, you can't change an entire family. Where do people get off thinking they have the right to reshape someone else? It's hard to enjoy this comfortable lifestyle, though, because if I had actually submitted to her way of raising me, she probably wouldn't trust me enough to provide this kind of support anymore. Mom is cutting me off financially; it's not what it used to be ;(

Haha, gentlefalcon, I’m seeing my own reflection in your posts—it’s almost unsettling how much I recognize those sentiments in your words. My father’s side of the family went completely off the deep end regarding religion a few years back, and I mean truly, intensely devoted. We’re talking community gatherings several times a week, dismissing basically every major news outlet because they think the media is just out to get God, and hosting visiting believers from halfway across the globe... even my grandfather used to corner me for hours, preaching about my "conversion"—as if faith were something you could just hand over like a gift—while droning on with his prayers for ten hours a day. It was quite a lot, to say the least.

Anyway, my takeaway? This specific lifestyle—this hyper-focused way of viewing existence through the lens of divine will—isn't inherently evil or even "wrong," per se. It doesn't force anyone else into anything. But it is incredibly, profoundly STUPID. And honestly, I think I’ve finally wrapped my head around the actual mechanics of how faith operates. 😉

Fortunately, I live with my mother, who isn't wired that way, so I have some breathing room. My only real regret is that my father owns a massive house where I could easily have my own apartment; unfortunately, I can't stomach the idea of living there, knowing he would never stop hounding me. So, when the time comes for me to move out on my own, I'll be looking at studio apartments or taking out a mortgage. Beyond that, I have zero interest in marrying a religious fanatic or having children who are raised that way—I know for a fact she would work tirelessly to indoctrinate them from infancy, and unlike her failed attempts with me, the success rate with kids is notoriously high.