Dealing with difficult people?

I mean, our folks are fine compared to those people out West. They’re just exhausting, I guess. They come up to you and start rambling nonsense, trying to force a conversation on you, and they talk way too loud. It’s the same everywhere, from kids in the clubs to old guys on the street. Honestly, just kill 'em all.

I’m cutting ties with someone like that completely—I'm done being cast as the villain in everyone else's drama.☕ I actually felt bad about it, but what can you do? I'm not Mother Teresa... plus, I'm just not interested in putting up with his constant ego trips and insults.🙄

Good grief, if only there were just one of them... though, honestly, they seem to be popping up everywhere you look these days... God help us all if we have to deal with more people like that.

I have the energy to be difficult online, but in person? I freeze up completely.
I get people like that... including the cyclists and the runners.
I have to admit, watching those situations unfold is just painfully awkward to witness.
I feel for the rest of you, too.
I don't have much wisdom to offer the author, other than the fact that when people are truly in your position, they always find a way to push someone out if that’s what they actually want.
But the real question is—as keks puts it—do you actually want to get rid of this annoying guy?

I've noticed in plenty of cases that people seemingly love it when things like this happen. They suddenly step into the role of society's moral compass, deciding how everyone should behave, and spend hours over coffee barking about these lonely losers.
Personally, I’d argue the former group is actually more obnoxious than the annoying, lonely ones; if they weren't so desperate for attention, they wouldn't focus on them so much. This isn't really about the author, though—it's more about the women who act this way, since it seems to be a more frequent occurrence with them.

I’ve got people like that in my life all the time, constantly throwing things away, but I don't buy the idea that it's some kind of clinical disorder in everyone. Some folks are just wired that way, while others seem to get a twisted sense of satisfaction from messing with the people around them or just being the center of attention at any cost.

I know him. Some kid is throwing some big party for his birthday... I haven't gone to a single one, even though he invited me. He's my neighbor, so I heard him out on the patio loudly badmouthing our other neighbor—just totally disrespectful. And I know how he acts when that guy is actually around; he’s a complete pushover.

One time he actually chased me down while I was out on my bike. I managed to duck into a side street 🎉 Now he's acting like he's mad at me.

I find these people who chase cyclists to be ridiculous 😂 One lunatic even attacked me at the intersection near the Liszt concert hall. It was pure luck the cops were directing traffic, so I just squeezed through the crowd and got away 😁

I know exactly what you mean—I’ve been through this myself, actually. There are just certain people like that, where even though they’re using perfectly normal words, you can just feel it... you can sense that something isn't quite right with them, and their way of speaking feels forced rather than natural or spontaneous. So, I am completely on your side here. Honestly, I'm not sure how one even goes about getting rid of someone like that, but I don't think running away from them or trying to belittle them is the answer, either.

Sam Hayes said:I know exactly what you mean—I’ve been through this myself, actually. There are just certain people like that, where even though they’re using perfectly normal words, you can just feel it... you can sense that something isn't quite right with them, and their way of speaking feels forced rather than natural or spontaneous. So, I am completely on your side here. Honestly, I'm not sure how one even goes about getting rid of someone like that, but I don't think running away from them or trying to belittle them is the answer, either.

What gives it away?
Is it their eyes? The way they phrase things?
Specifically, what is it?

As someone once put it, you're rejecting anyone who isn't an absolute carbon copy of the rest of the population.
Good grief, if you want a war of clones, why not just have everyone wear the same clothes, get the same haircuts, and follow a manual on "proper" behavior?
Give me a break... 🙏

Yeah, well, I'm one of those people who smells a bit off... my eyes wander when I talk and I'm terrible at small talk. I'm not "normal," alright?

At least I don't obsess over the Hollywood red carpet. I'm still doing okay on that front. 🤣

Dana Morales64 said:Do you have any specific types of exhausting, socially oblivious people that you go out of your way to avoid? Here’s an example from today—I’m grabbing coffee with a buddy, and this incredibly annoying guy just wanders over and sits right down with us. We finish our drinks and head off in our own direction, but the second we stand up, he starts interrogating us about where we're going. I tell him I'm heading home, so he follows up with "Oh yeah? Why?" Then, "What are you doing at home?" Then, "Doing what kind of work?" 🙄 And then comes the best part—as soon as we get to our bikes, he actually starts pedaling after us 🤣 He chases us for maybe a couple hundred yards before he finally gives up because he ran out of steam. To top it all off, he tried calling my cell afterward—of course, I didn't pick up.
This is just one instance of the absolute weirdos roaming this planet. What is actually wrong with people like this? Are they even sane? How low can someone sink to act like that? I mean, look, we've known this guy for a while; he isn't quite as unhinged as my friend, but he is painfully draining because he needs to know everything about everyone. He has zero boundaries—he doesn't know how to sit still, and he clearly doesn't know how to behave in public. When we run into him, he doesn't know when to leave or when enough is enough. That's exactly why we steer clear. Is there a permanent way to deal with these special cases? And the worst part? It's not even some random teenager; we're talking about a grown man in his 20s.

Poor guy... 🤣🤣🤣
You guys are so mean🤣

Maybe he's actually dealing with some mental health stuff?

... you guys are some pretty weak cyclists...

Brenda Cooper3 said:What gives it away?
Is it their eyes? The way they phrase things?
Specifically, what is it?

As someone once put it, you're rejecting anyone who isn't an absolute carbon copy of the rest of the population.
Good grief, if you want a war of clones, why not just have everyone wear the same clothes, get the same haircuts, and follow a manual on "proper" behavior?
Give me a break... 🙏

Yeah, well, I'm one of those people who smells a bit off... my eyes wander when I talk and I'm terrible at small talk. I'm not "normal," alright?

At least I don't obsess over the Hollywood red carpet. I'm still doing okay on that front. 🤣

Personally, I think you're totally cool because you're genuinely different from the crowd. It's weird to me that you don't really have friends—you probably just ran into the wrong people. To me, you're actually pretty interesting.

Jason Booth25 said:Personally, I think you're totally cool because you're genuinely different from the crowd. It's weird to me that you don't really have friends—you probably just ran into the wrong people. To me, you're actually pretty interesting.

WTF... 😕
this thread isn't about me.

Edit your post before the mods hit you with a strike for spamming. ☕

Come on, just take the compliment with some grace—you’re such a rebel, aren't you?🤣 Anyway, my apologies to the moderators if I’m cluttering up this thread; I'll make sure it doesn't happen again.

I have to admit—compliments are nice to receive😬
I’m just an ordinary person🤷
Thanks!

By the way, how can you claim to know everyone's character on this forum after only two months and 153 posts?🤔
Are you some kind of clone, or do you just spend all your time reading? Hmm...

Anyway, back to the point.
It isn't that I'm defending obnoxious people.
It’s just that nothing irritates me more than those "victims" who seem to take a certain gloating pleasure in the unexpected mess they've found themselves in.☕

P.S. I hope I'm using the right term since it's been a while, but I think it's that specific sensation—that little flutter in your stomach when you're thrilled about something but feel you can't share it with just anyone. Schaudenfreude? Or perhaps just pure glee.☕

Dana Morales64 said:Do you have any specific types of exhausting, socially oblivious people that you go out of your way to avoid? Here’s an example from today—I’m grabbing coffee with a buddy, and this incredibly annoying guy just wanders over and sits right down with us. We finish our drinks and head off in our own direction, but the second we stand up, he starts interrogating us about where we're going. I tell him I'm heading home, so he follows up with "Oh yeah? Why?" Then, "What are you doing at home?" Then, "Doing what kind of work?" 🙄 And then comes the best part—as soon as we get to our bikes, he actually starts pedaling after us 🤣 He chases us for maybe a couple hundred yards before he finally gives up because he ran out of steam. To top it all off, he tried calling my cell afterward—of course, I didn't pick up.
This is just one instance of the absolute weirdos roaming this planet. What is actually wrong with people like this? Are they even sane? How low can someone sink to act like that? I mean, look, we've known this guy for a while; he isn't quite as unhinged as my friend, but he is painfully draining because he needs to know everything about everyone. He has zero boundaries—he doesn't know how to sit still, and he clearly doesn't know how to behave in public. When we run into him, he doesn't know when to leave or when enough is enough. That's exactly why we steer clear. Is there a permanent way to deal with these special cases? And the worst part? It's not even some random teenager; we're talking about a grown man in his 20s.

The guy clearly has issues and is profoundly lonely, which he obviously doesn't know how to handle. He thinks he's making progress by forcing himself into people's lives, but it’s completely counterproductive. Instead of trying to be a decent friend, you end up treating them like they're beneath you.

To Brenda Cooper3: I’ve been lurking on this forum for about a year now, which has actually helped me figure out exactly who I vibe with and who I don't. As for posting, my motivation is pretty hit-or-miss; some days I feel totally inspired to write, and then I'll disappear for a while because I just don't feel like it.

Regarding the topic at hand, I’ve always felt a certain level of sympathy for people who get ostracized by their social circles. Even if they deserve it in some cases, I try not to make sweeping generalizations because every situation is unique. I can certainly empathize with the author’s frustration regarding being interrogated; personally, I find it unbearable too. Being someone who struggles with anxiety, being questioned feels like an immediate trigger for my panic attacks😁. That said, if someone is acting with good intentions but is simply oblivious to how exhausting they're being, I think it’s important to gently point out where they're going wrong. People often truly lack any self-awareness about how they come across to others.

Jason Booth25 said:To Brenda Cooper3: I’ve been lurking on this forum for about a year now, which has actually helped me figure out exactly who I vibe with and who I don't. As for posting, my motivation is pretty hit-or-miss; some days I feel totally inspired to write, and then I'll disappear for a while because I just don't feel like it.

Regarding the topic at hand, I’ve always felt a certain level of sympathy for people who get ostracized by their social circles. Even if they deserve it in some cases, I try not to make sweeping generalizations because every situation is unique. I can certainly empathize with the author’s frustration regarding being interrogated; personally, I find it unbearable too. Being someone who struggles with anxiety, being questioned feels like an immediate trigger for my panic attacks😁. That said, if someone is acting with good intentions but is simply oblivious to how exhausting they're being, I think it’s important to gently point out where they're going wrong. People often truly lack any self-awareness about how they come across to others.

He probably is just tedious. It seems we all love to manufacture these grand narratives here, trying to convince the OP about some pervasive goodness or humanity that should reside in our hearts—his heart, specifically. Apparently, he’s strayed from the path of righteousness, which is quite a development.
yada yada yada 🤣

Of course the guy is as exhausting as a nagging neighbor on a Sunday morning. 😠
Why bother chasing after anyone on a bike?

The real question is: is a person truly incapable of cutting someone off if they want to, or have they just been gripped by a sudden burst of sentimentality that they feel compelled to share on a forum? We all know who this psychoanalysis is actually aimed at—the OP himself!!

How could you, honestly? 😠 🙂
🤣🤣
Imagine how you would feel if your friends refused to tell you that you're redundant. You partially know you are, yet you keep hoping and convincing yourself that you aren't... ??

The author isn't to blame. It's this primitive society that creates these awkward situations and eagerly anticipates them.
In America, people find it entertaining to mock those who are struggling... I have countless examples from growing up...
Someone is socially awkward or difficult? Wow, let's gang up and make fun of them! 🙏

Brenda Cooper3 said:He probably is just tedious. It seems we all love to manufacture these grand narratives here, trying to convince the OP about some pervasive goodness or humanity that should reside in our hearts—his heart, specifically. Apparently, he’s strayed from the path of righteousness, which is quite a development.
yada yada yada 🤣

Of course the guy is as exhausting as a nagging neighbor on a Sunday morning. 😠
Why bother chasing after anyone on a bike?

The real question is: is a person truly incapable of cutting someone off if they want to, or have they just been gripped by a sudden burst of sentimentality that they feel compelled to share on a forum? We all know who this psychoanalysis is actually aimed at—the OP himself!!

How could you, honestly? 😠 🙂
🤣🤣
Imagine how you would feel if your friends refused to tell you that you're redundant. You partially know you are, yet you keep hoping and convincing yourself that you aren't... ??

The author isn't to blame. It's this primitive society that creates these awkward situations and eagerly anticipates them.
In America, people find it entertaining to mock those who are struggling... I have countless examples from growing up...
Someone is socially awkward or difficult? Wow, let's gang up and make fun of them! 🙏

... So, what you're actually saying is there’s zero empathy for anyone who doesn't fit our specific little mold? That we'd much rather take our frustrations out on others instead of actually meeting them halfway? Yeah, I'm with you on that... (though, granted, not everyone is quite that cynical...)

Yeah, totally. I get why people feel normal doing this. They play the victim card because they actually love the attention—it’s a total ego trip when they have maniacs running around them like 🙄
.
That said, there are definitely some genuinely insufferable people out there...☕

casualharbor9 said:... So, what you're actually saying is there’s zero empathy for anyone who doesn't fit our specific little mold? That we'd much rather take our frustrations out on others instead of actually meeting them halfway? Yeah, I'm with you on that... (though, granted, not everyone is quite that cynical...)

No, that isn't what I'm saying.

Compassion is noble.
Mockery is primitive.

However, we can never truly know if this guy is actually as exhausting as a parasite, or if he's just being perceived that way...
The reality is, most of us have felt cast out by society at some point—everyone has, at least once.
Perhaps this sudden urge for "sympathy" is just a projection of our own inner child, reacting to an old wound rather than dealing with the actual person. We might be projecting onto someone who is genuinely, pathologically draining, or even just incredibly dense and unable to see the obvious, as the author describes.
Maybe he was the golden child, coddled by everyone, and never learned how to handle being socially ostracized.
Who knows. It's all speculation.

There's no point in debating this further until I can look this guy in the eye myself.