I feel like I'm a total failure at everything

I honestly don't get it. Why does everything I touch just... fail? Or just fall apart after a while? I feel like a walking disaster zone. Take making friends, for example. Everything’s going fine, then suddenly everyone just decides they hate me out of nowhere. It's like these idiots just wake up one day and decide I don't exist anymore. 😠 It’s the exact same story with pretty much any job I try. Everything I attempt turns into a wreck. Like someone would say, I was literally born to fail. And it feels permanent, like there's no fixing it. At home, it's just constant criticism—being told I'm this or that. At school, people just talk trash, pushing me down constantly. All I hear is how stupid or slow I am, just endless garbage. It feels like they're doing it on purpose to wreck my confidence, and then they have the nerve to tell me, "Oh, you just need more self-esteem." How am I supposed to have any when people are constantly tearing me down? How do you even ignore the jerks who live to ruin your day—or honestly, your whole life? Some people can brush it off, but I can't even manage that. 😠 👎 help

So, if everyone at your school decided to jump out a window, would you follow them right over the edge too?🙂
Honestly, screw what other people say. You’re the only one who knows if you’re actually doing damage or not. If you are, then fix yourself. If you aren't, there's zero point in paying attention to idiots because they won't help you one bit.
Just live your life and always trust your own gut instead of listening to the noise.👍

Alright, tell me a bit about yourself...
What makes you different from the rest of them? In your opinion, why is it that people can't seem to stand being around you.
Why would they go out of their way to insult you like that? Even back home?

So, I'm 16. Yeah, I'm basically the old lady of my class. When I was about 6, I had this crazy dream where I was in a massive car wreck and ended up paralyzed for two years. After two years of just... struggling, the dream ended with some intense leg surgery (sorry, blunt phrasing, I know) and suddenly I was back on my feet. I was 9 when that happened, which meant I started first grade at 9. Obviously, once everyone found out, they started giving me crap just because I'm the oldest in the room.😠

That’s why my grades have started tanking lately, and now my parents are constantly breathing down my neck about it at home. They honestly have no clue what I’m actually going through. All they say is that I "don't know how to stand up for myself." Like, okay, thanks for the tip. How am I supposed to actually do that? I'm 16—how do you properly stand your ground against a pack of idiots who spend basically every single day messing with your head and won't leave you alone? Seriously, how???

Lisa Lopez6 said:That’s why my grades have started tanking lately, and now my parents are constantly breathing down my neck about it at home. They honestly have no clue what I’m actually going through. All they say is that I "don't know how to stand up for myself." Like, okay, thanks for the tip. How am I supposed to actually do that? I'm 16—how do you properly stand your ground against a pack of idiots who spend basically every single day messing with your head and won't leave you alone? Seriously, how???

High school will be a total fresh start for you.
It’s probably nearly impossible to change the dynamic with the people at your current school right now.
I guess you should try not to let them get to you too much. Just keep your head up and forget about them. Everything usually settles down eventually.

Work on that self-confidence and get an edge, you know? You’re older than them, which basically means you've got more power... you can't just let people walk all over you like that.

So, looks like you're missing that support system at home where confidence is actually supposed to grow—call me a poet or whatever🙂. Honestly? You can't do it alone. If you can't even "tough it out" right now (school is basically a pressure cooker where people either harden up or just snap), then you seriously need professional help. People act like only little kids need love and attention, but man, we need it our whole lives, especially during those awkward, sensitive years...

The roots of your self-doubt? They usually trace back to a family dynamic where you just weren't accepted for who you actually are. It leaves you with this skewed self-image—this lack of basic self-respect—that ends up pushing people away before they even get a chance to know you. But look, you aren't broken. You’re fine. You just need to put in some work on your own mindset and try to flip the script toward something more positive. If you do that, I guarantee you'll succeed 100%

Honey, you seriously need to be proud of yourself for getting back on your feet after being sidelined for two whole years!!!
That right there is the first real proof of how much grit you actually have and just how much you want to live, don't you think?
Those kids in your class are basically toddlers compared to you, honestly, you could probably babysit them if you wanted to.

You’ve gotta forgive yourself, because none of this is your fault. It's not your fault that you started first grade at nine years old. And girl, it is absolutely not your fault that your home life is the way it is. They are who they are, and honestly, stop letting it eat at you—just focus on yourself. You have to be the most important person in your own life and let everyone else think whatever nonsense they want.

If you feel like you've got nobody to turn to, just go ahead and make an appointment with a school counselor or someone at your local community health center to help you work on your self-esteem and your sense of worth.
There is no way you are worthless or stupid, and you were definitely NOT BORN TO FAIL!!!

Sending you nothing but the best luck!

I’m standing right there with silverraven7... and look, I'm 33, so I think I've got enough life under my belt to tell you straight: clawing your way back to solid ground after everything's been taken from you is a massive victory. It's the kind of comeback most people dream about but never actually pull off.
You're clearly more mature than the rest of your classmates combined, so it isn't any shocker that they see you the way they do. Honestly, they're just too immature to wrap their heads around it.
Trust me, give it a few years and the landscape is going to shift completely; people are going to respect you immensely for what you've endured.
Focus on your own journey, but try to reach back and help those peers who find themselves stuck in the exact same spot you once were. Use your story to show them that getting back on your feet is actually possible. So many people are just drifting aimlessly, and you have the power to offer them some real hope. I truly believe finding that purpose will bring you a sense of fulfillment and help make sense of everything you've been through.

Lisa Lopez6 said:So, I'm 16. Yeah, I'm basically the old lady of my class. When I was about 6, I had this crazy dream where I was in a massive car wreck and ended up paralyzed for two years. After two years of just... struggling, the dream ended with some intense leg surgery (sorry, blunt phrasing, I know) and suddenly I was back on my feet. I was 9 when that happened, which meant I started first grade at 9. Obviously, once everyone found out, they started giving me crap just because I'm the oldest in the room.😠

I guess I’d probably say that they should have just placed her in first grade instead of third—though, honestly, she definitely could have handled the curriculum without any trouble. It really makes you wonder what happens when psychologists don't step in and do their jobs when they're supposed to.

I suppose you shouldn't give them too much headspace—honestly, it’s probably best to just view this whole period as one of those fleeting, slightly ridiculous phases that you'll eventually look back on with a smile. It's one of those things you really shouldn't have spent so much energy worrying about while you were actually in the middle of it. If I can offer any advice, maybe try to lean into your age as an advantage—try to come across as someone who simply understands life, people, and how the world works a bit more deeply. You really do seem to have a better handle on things than the average person your age—or even the kids in your grade, for that matter. It might just be a result of circumstance, I guess, but it's certainly true.

Don't you dare give up—honestly, the worst is probably already behind you.

It’s so easy for everyone to sit there and preach about just ignoring what people say, but it’s a completely different story when you're actually dealing with it and facing insults on a daily basis... honestly, it just messes with your head until you start believing that you really are the person they claim you are😲. No matter how much people tell us not to care about the noise or what others think, it’s just not true. Unfortunately, some people's words don't just go in one ear and out the other; they actually stick😢

You really need to sit your people down and be blunt about how you feel—tell them exactly how their behavior is hitting you. And don't just say it once; you have to keep at it until they actually start taking you seriously. Build your ground, hold your line, and stick to it... that’s the only way this works.

Jamie Cox12 said:It’s so easy for everyone to sit there and preach about just ignoring what people say, but it’s a completely different story when you're actually dealing with it and facing insults on a daily basis... honestly, it just messes with your head until you start believing that you really are the person they claim you are😲. No matter how much people tell us not to care about the noise or what others think, it’s just not true. Unfortunately, some people's words don't just go in one ear and out the other; they actually stick😢

Yes, that is incredibly painful while it's actually happening. And it's hard to move past it, especially if it's only happened once or twice in your life. For someone as young as the original poster, I suppose that's perfectly understandable. But perhaps with each subsequent time—and let's be honest, this will happen to everyone thousands of times throughout a lifetime—you become a bit wiser; you realize that these things always have their own context. If someone is mocking you, maybe it isn't just because you are being difficult, but rather because that person is simply unkind, insecure, foolish, or just looking for a fight? Those aren't exactly great qualities to have. A decent, well-adjusted person would probably rather hang out with the target of the mockery than with someone acting like that. It takes some time, I guess, to realize your own worth—what makes you a good person, a friend, a student, or a child to your parents.

No one is born to fail, though some people certainly train themselves to expect nothing and to doubt everything, especially themselves. You will always have yourself above all else, so please don't forget that—other people (especially those who are insignificant or rude) simply cannot be the yardstick for your value.

Thanks so much for all the advice, everyone 😘😘😘😘
Big shoutout to silverraven7 😉
Look, silverraven7, I’m just feeling incredibly grateful to God (if He's actually listening) that I finally feel like a normal human being again after two years of pure hell. Seriously, it's hard to explain how draining it is to have someone tearing you down every single day. Just try to imagine being in my shoes for a second. 😳
On another note—things have been pretty tense with my parents lately. I ended up failing half my semester, and now they won't stop giving me grief about it. Honestly, it’s mostly because I was dealing with those idiots constant verbal abuse every single day 😢 👎

Lisa Hernandez3 said:Yes, that is incredibly painful while it's actually happening. And it's hard to move past it, especially if it's only happened once or twice in your life. For someone as young as the original poster, I suppose that's perfectly understandable. But perhaps with each subsequent time—and let's be honest, this will happen to everyone thousands of times throughout a lifetime—you become a bit wiser; you realize that these things always have their own context. If someone is mocking you, maybe it isn't just because you are being difficult, but rather because that person is simply unkind, insecure, foolish, or just looking for a fight? Those aren't exactly great qualities to have. A decent, well-adjusted person would probably rather hang out with the target of the mockery than with someone acting like that. It takes some time, I guess, to realize your own worth—what makes you a good person, a friend, a student, or a child to your parents.

No one is born to fail, though some people certainly train themselves to expect nothing and to doubt everything, especially themselves. You will always have yourself above all else, so please don't forget that—other people (especially those who are insignificant or rude) simply cannot be the yardstick for your value.

I agree with you, but unfortunately, you can't just hit "delete" on someone's nasty comments... This happens to so many kids (especially in middle and high school), and I honestly think almost everyone has experienced some form of "bullying." What's even sadder is how teachers and professors tend to turn a deaf ear when it happens, mostly because so many people feel ashamed to even speak up about it... And the people who insult others—even if they don't realize they're doing it—they end up holding others back from living a normal life, basically turning them into the same insecure messes they are themselves...😢
I don't even know what else to tell the OP, except to stay strong. Because if she’s managed to endure everything she has so far, she’s already proven she's tough. As for friends—if they just suddenly ditch you, then they weren't real friends to begin with, and you never needed them anyway. Besides, you're your own best friend.🙂

Of course you weren't meant to fail. Honestly, just getting through that accident makes you more successful than anyone mocking you right now. Shake off those insecurities people tried to push on you. Just give it your all, focus on school, and head into high school with total confidence. Find your crowd there, and don't even bother acknowledging the ones who were jerks to you. You don't owe them anything. Good luck 😉

Maybe you’re just untalented at certain things, but I don't think you're hopeless across the board. Is being unable to do something always a lack of talent? Or is it just poor focus, a lack of interest, or—to use your word—just being slow? Ever tried playing chess? Forget volleyball, that’s a lost cause...
Regarding the current school situation, there’s going to be a MASSIVE shift once high school hits, unless all those same people from middle school follow you there trying to keep up the same drama. It should turn out fine. And honestly, why do these insults get to you so much? They're just a bunch of DAMN SPOILED LOSERS who have nothing better to do than mess with someone's head. They're basically children compared to you, right? 🙂It’ll be stupid if you start fighting or even bothering to ignore them; just handle the conflict with cold indifference.
Good luck!

Forget about trying to please everyone else, just focus on being the absolute best, most gorgeous, and sharpest version of yourself—treat yourself like you're the VIP, and eventually, the rest of the world will start treating you that way too. Oh, and one more thing—try to lighten up a bit. Start finding the punchline in everything, even if it means making a joke at your own expense once in a while. Trust me, life is a hell of a lot easier when you don't take yourself so seriously.