Is love really blind?

silentpilot6 said:If they truly feel zero connection to anyone "normal," then they are simply being irrational 🤷

Whether I’ve lived my whole life acting with complete logic is a difficult question. Perhaps I just possess a subconscious filter 😁 that instinctively weeds out people who might cause me harm, though that isn't always a certainty.
You can dive headfirst into a relationship "without thinking," but eventually, your reason should kick in to provide clarity and perspective.
For instance, my intuition told me to walk away from that married woman... and I have never once regretted that decision.

The idea of "losing one's mind" is also highly debatable. I understand those who lose their heads over someone genuinely kind and high-quality... but those who lose themselves over toxic jerks 😁, parasites, or manipulators 😬 are beyond my comprehension; I cannot understand or justify their actions in any way.
If you’ve been following this thread, you've seen—though there are always two sides to every story—that the people these individuals were obsessing over weren't exactly prizes or social favorites. Often, everyone around them 😁 was explicitly telling them to stay away from certain people... yet it didn't help.
To me, that is what it means to lose your head over a jerk, and it can never be justified.

Searching for Love... honestly, how does anyone actually fall for an obvious jerk? 🤷
Again, I am speaking from my own experience. I’ve had relationships that were "just casual"—I never fell in love.
I’ve also been with people who were clearly unstable, and I never fell for them either.
I’ve dealt with people who tried to manipulate me, and I walked away from them very quickly.
But the women I actually loved never made fools of me.

Regarding that last point, call me cold and calculating if you must 😁, but you should never lose sight of yourself for anyone else... especially not for someone you might be wonderful with today, only to pass them on a street in a year and look the other way. 👎

Drew Morgan said:No. This is a much more complex mechanism. First off, have you even been following that thread? If not, you have no idea what’s actually going on there. It isn't about love—believe me—it's pure, unadulterated temporary insanity. Go read the thread and see for yourself.

Those women didn't just "dare to love"—they stepped far beyond the boundaries of love, reason, and anything remotely recognizable in a sane universe.

quietpilot87 said:Good 4 U. I wasn't born with a PhD in consciousness, and I'm not ashamed of it. Yeah, idiots have played me before—I'm claiming my right to be stupid. I think everyone gets a certain number of credits for that. 🙏

It's not about being right all the time; it's about eating a pile of crap so you know better than to do it again next time.

cosmictinker21 said:Not really... it's more that their value systems and core needs were shaped by different circumstances. If someone spends their formative years—back when they're still figuring out intimacy and what a partnership actually looks like—buried in romance novels instead of actually observing how real relationships function, they tend to get stuck in that romanticized bubble. Often, those "foundations" aren't even theirs; they're just patterns picked up from people nearby, magazines, or poetry where every second verse is about some grand, sweeping passion. When you're young, you don't always see past the romance to the deeper stuff. I mean, Romeo and Juliet isn't just a story about unrequited longing; it dives into much heavier social and emotional complexities. You don't really start grasping those nuances until much later, once you've lived through things beyond just a broken heart. It's especially true if there's very little talk about Love within the family, or any outward signs of affection and intimacy... if those things aren't modeled at home, a young person is left to scavenge for whatever information happens to be most accessible.

Jamie Reyes73 said:Quote : Legion

Legion As follows: Reading through that infamous thread over on Reddit—you know the one—one question just kept hitting me. Is love actually blind? It probably is deaf and stupid, too...

Since you aren't exactly operating with a fully sound mind—or even much reasoning, for that matter—I’ll just say this: love isn't all it's cracked up to be.
Even when it’s mutual—well, damn—it’s just nature, and there's really nothing we can do to control it.
Deciding whether or not to let yourself fall in love—it's a choice, really. A bit of a gamble, if you ask me.
Quote : Legion

People aren't stupid. 😁
Quote : Legion

So that’s your "moral" standard—the line you refuse to cross...
We aren't all cut from the same cloth—for instance, I find pride to be just as much of a useless distraction as...
And love... when you're falling, that chemical rush takes over—you aren't quite yourself anymore. Tell me—have you ever actually been there?
Is he in love?

Quote : Legion

Legion As follows: Do people actually believe love conquers all? It doesn't—and even that idealized version of love we see in movies is almost always a one-way street. People end up suffering, making fools of themselves... tossing away friends and family, or tanking their finances and lives, all for someone who clearly doesn't give a damn about them.

Love is just an evolutionary drive inside us... you can't argue with the biology.
It’s what pushes you to find a partner and reproduce—damn it. 😍

Drew Morgan said:I find you far more interesting than those hacks, who all agreed this was nothing more than a temporary bout of madness.

The truth is, you’re constantly, without fail, outraged by things you don't grasp, while insisting on your own magical, perfectly logical stance on everything under the sun.

By your logic, an anorexic could easily bulk up just by being told that guys don't like that look because skinny isn't sexy (it's like telling a driver to stop idling if they want to save gas—common sense exists). 😍

Give it a rest! 😂

velvetrider said:I mean, love is about trust—it isn't blind. It’s more about how much you’re actually willing to risk by letting someone in, I guess. And common sense is definitely in the mix; it’s kind of what keeps you from totally breaking down.
Love needs two people, right? You can't have a monologue, whether you're talking or just thinking.
..time.. sometimes all it takes is just one moment, nothing more.
And pride... good grief, you should be proud of things that matter, but maybe not when it comes to love.

silentpilot6 said:Rebecca Scott3... you're exaggerating a bit... honestly... 😁
I didn't even finish reading your post, because seeing that much text at once just kills my motivation to read.

silentpilot6 said:And you're just as stubborn, always popping up in my threads to pick a fight... if that's what makes you happy, go ahead. 👍

That’s why I started this discussion in psychology; I figured we'd get a much more interesting debate here than on that other forum where everyone just cries together and offers endless, hollow pats on the back and empty platitudes. 😁 In the USA

As for the anorexia issue... when all those public figures on JUMBO plakat, on TV, or on the radio scream about how being underweight isn't healthy or attractive—and then they show images of people with anorexia that are supposed to illustrate how disastrous it is 😁—there isn't a single "critic" of that approach to be found. But the moment I say the exact same thing, suddenly everyone starts attacking me. 😕

Morgan Collins20 said:I don't really buy the idea that Love is blind—it feels more like we're just choosing to close our eyes when we first fall... all those little things that eventually end up disappointing us? They were always there, honestly—we either ignored them or just pretended they didn't exist in the first place! 🙂

velvetrider said:I mean, love is about trust—it isn't blind. It’s more about how much you’re actually willing to risk by letting someone in, I guess. And common sense is definitely in the mix; it’s kind of what keeps you from totally breaking down.
Love needs two people, right? You can't have a monologue, whether you're talking or just thinking.
..time.. sometimes all it takes is just one moment, nothing more.
And pride... good grief, you should be proud of things that matter, but maybe not when it comes to love.

silentpilot6 said:People aren't necessarily foolish... but let's be honest, many simply lack common sense. 😁
I agree that it's difficult, if not impossible, to control whether we fall in love or not... but it’s quite obvious that some people simply have a little more luck than others. 🤔 It’s strange how people fall for all sorts of characters—types that probably nobody else, not even their own mother, could ever truly love. 😬 It seems I am the only one who feels this way...

Listen, you’re asking if I’ve ever been in love? If you had read my posts on Reddit four or five years ago, you would have seen just how many tears I shed. 😁 So you go out with two different women and then have the nerve to call love unnecessary bullshit?😕
Have you ever truly been in love?
Pride can be a very healthy thing. 😁He should be, if anything, a shield against total gutter behavior... Something like, "I couldn't care less what anyone thinks." 😁 👍

Drew Morgan said:I believe unconditional love is reserved strictly for animals. And even then, it’s only possible if you actually care for and understand them. If such a thing exists, it stops at the kennel door.

Drew Morgan said:In my experience, absolutely. When you live with an animal, you get to know their true essence, and they learn yours too. You’ll find yourself forgiving them for things a sane person would never overlook, though a total lunatic might. Sure, a pet can't pull the kind of scams a human can, but they can certainly be dominant, calculating, vengeful, selfish, or just a straight-up menace. There is no way I’m forgiving those traits in a boyfriend (nor would he forgive them in me), yet despite all that, we both absolutely adore our little troublemaker rabbit.

Gerald Ward61 said:I’m gonna drop one of my own here regarding love—probably the wisest thing ever said about it, even if some other geniuses thought it first, though who cares about that 😁 😉...

People love exactly as much as they are capable of, you know? Like, based on what they actually know and can handle.

Is love blind? Well, personally, I’d say love comes equipped with its own microscope.

Passion, obsession, just losing your damn mind—when you're caught in the middle of those emotions, there's no other way to be. Now, why those feelings hit certain people harder than others is a whole different ballgame and basically needs a custom approach for everyone. It’s all a kind of obsession; if you understand the theory behind it, things get a little easier because you don't get quite so lost in the sauce. It doesn't feel nearly as freakish, either. You realize you need to reel it in and you're actually willing to cooperate. And obviously, there's a massive difference whether these crazy passions hit you when you're young or later in life. Still, (or let's hope for most people, which is probably true statistically speaking) we tend to be more grounded as we age, so if those emotional tornadoes show up, they're harder to stomach, but maybe easier to shut down since you have more life experience under your belt (unless, of course, you don't, in which case my whole theory goes right out the window).

So, regarding that whole pride thing Sean Cruz mentioned... in my opinion, in an "ideal" or even just a "normal" partnership, pride is totally useless because it just evaporates through the constant cycle of giving and receiving. It becomes fundamentally unnecessary, not just "kind of" unnecessary. I'm guessing you're thinking about things like being insulted and all that... which you already brought up... but do you really think *that* is love? Nah, that’s just the prelude to getting there.
But then again, being petty or turning your back on someone isn't exactly loving either, right? Moderation, ugh... honestly, people should just find one partner and stick with them from start to finish. And man, wouldn't that be great if we actually knew which person suited us best and who would push us to grow (and vice versa), assuming we were all self-aware enough to know the theory and had some solid mentors to guide us. Did I miss anything? 😁 😉 Oh, yeah, I owe an apology to all my exes (always good practice). 🙂

Everyone loves only as much as they are capable of, knowing and being able to.

Is love blind? Well, I’d argue that love actually comes equipped with a microscope.
Passion, madness, or sheer frenzy—when you're caught in the middle of that emotional "wash," you can't be any other way. Now, why those emotions hit you with varying intensity is a different matter entirely and requires an individual approach. They are essentially obsessions; if you understand them theoretically, it's easier because you don't get quite as lost in the fray. It isn't even that strange. You know you need to reel it in, and you're willing to cooperate. Of course, there's a difference between experiencing such passionate loves in your youth versus later in life. Still, (or let's hope for most people, which I believe is statistically true from multiple angles) a person is more grounded. So, if those tornadoes hit, they are harder to endure, but easier to stop because you possess more wisdom (though, granted, if you lack it, my theory falls apart).

Now, regarding pride, Sean Cruz mentioned it... In my view, within an "ideal" or "normal" partnership, pride is a useless thing because it evaporates through the cycle of giving and receiving. It becomes unnecessary fundamentally, not just conceptually. I assume you're thinking about insults and such, as you mentioned... but do you really think that is love? It isn't; you haven't reached it yet.
But playing games or turning your back on someone isn't exactly loving either, is it? Moderation... ugh. That's why people should ideally have one partner from beginning to end. It would be wonderful if we knew exactly who suits us and who would encourage us to change, just as we would encourage them—provided we were all aware of these dynamics, understood the theory, and had good mentors.

Sure, I’ll apologize to all my exes (it’s always a good move). 🙂