Psychology: Is it all just fluff?

I have just come to the realization that things may never truly improve. I spent years hoping to find some semblance of peace or happiness, but it remains elusive. I have read countless psychology books, attempted to adopt positive thinking, and worked extensively on myself... there are brief windows of progress, only for me to slide back into those same dark thoughts—the desire to simply not exist, the urge to end it all. (Though, perhaps I lack the courage for such an act, as the physical pain terrifies me; still, in those moments, I wouldn't mind if a car struck me in a crossing. My recklessness in traffic tends to increase during these periods...)
After so many attempts to force myself into being happy, satisfied, or free from fear... everything reverts to its original state. I am losing my faith that any change is possible. I have even watched documentaries on the subject. I saw a segment about someone with symptoms similar to mine undergoing electroconvulsive therapy—you know, the kind where they use 😛 electrical impulses. In movies, people with traumatic childhoods almost always end up as serial killers, seemingly beyond any help.
Is this actually how life works? Do the wounds we receive once never truly heal? Or is modern psychology merely suggesting that everything can be fixed...

I can't just sit here and stay silent because I see myself in your post. It’s like suicidal thoughts become this constant, heavy background noise in your daily life when everything starts feeling impossible to handle. For me, it started with this vague sense of misery and dissatisfaction without any actual reason. On paper, I have everything an American would consider a successful life, but there's always this void. I’d have these few days where I felt genuinely positive, but then the depression would just crash back in. It wasn't until that "healthy" feeling completely vanished that I realized I actually needed professional help.
Maybe you aren't dealing with a clinical disorder. Maybe you're just going through a brutal rough patch right now. I can't say for sure based on what you wrote.
But I will say this: I've tried it all. I've poured through self-help books and even went to church, trying to force myself to believe in something—anything at all...
If this is a medical issue, though, it's biological. It means the chemical balance in your brain is off, and you can't fix that just by talking, reading books, or meditating. Sure, those things help, but they aren't a substitute for actual brain chemistry.
It looks like you have a few good months followed by these depressive episodes. That doesn't mean they'll happen more often, but they could.
Have you reached out for any real help yet?

You can devour every self-help book on the shelf if you want. It doesn't matter. Real change has to come from deep inside.
Sometimes, though, you just can't spot the red flags on your own. You can't fix what you don't see.
A lot of us are walking around carrying repressed baggage and toxic habits we were basically programmed to adopt by our parents and everything around us growing up.

Once it becomes clear that talk therapy isn't cutting it, that's when you use medication to balance out the brain chemistry.

Kyle Lee13 said:I can't just sit here and stay silent because I see myself in your post. It’s like suicidal thoughts become this constant, heavy background noise in your daily life when everything starts feeling impossible to handle. For me, it started with this vague sense of misery and dissatisfaction without any actual reason. On paper, I have everything an American would consider a successful life, but there's always this void. I’d have these few days where I felt genuinely positive, but then the depression would just crash back in. It wasn't until that "healthy" feeling completely vanished that I realized I actually needed professional help.
Maybe you aren't dealing with a clinical disorder. Maybe you're just going through a brutal rough patch right now. I can't say for sure based on what you wrote.
But I will say this: I've tried it all. I've poured through self-help books and even went to church, trying to force myself to believe in something—anything at all...
If this is a medical issue, though, it's biological. It means the chemical balance in your brain is off, and you can't fix that just by talking, reading books, or meditating. Sure, those things help, but they aren't a substitute for actual brain chemistry.
It looks like you have a few good months followed by these depressive episodes. That doesn't mean they'll happen more often, but they could.
Have you reached out for any real help yet?

This is not an isolated occurrence. Ever since I began studying psychology as a young girl around age twelve or thirteen, consuming books in an attempt to improve myself... I find myself once again losing the will to live. Besides, life lacks inherent meaning...

Jesse Ortiz4 said:You can devour every self-help book on the shelf if you want. It doesn't matter. Real change has to come from deep inside.
Sometimes, though, you just can't spot the red flags on your own. You can't fix what you don't see.
A lot of us are walking around carrying repressed baggage and toxic habits we were basically programmed to adopt by our parents and everything around us growing up.

Once it becomes clear that talk therapy isn't cutting it, that's when you use medication to balance out the brain chemistry.

I have worked on changing myself internally. Yet, everything always seems to revert to the old ways. It isn't a matter of repression; I have spoken openly about everything and owned my past. It is just... life feels profoundly senseless, and up until now, it has been nothing but painful. I cannot recall a single chapter of my life that wasn't marked by intense suffering. I don't intend to recount my entire life story here. I am simply wondering if anyone else has navigated a similar depression—how you managed to recover, and if recovery was ever truly permanent... That is all.

So, I actually went to see a psychiatrist recently, though it was regarding a different issue entirely. It was a complete waste of time; she was just doing her own thing, making rude remarks about my perspectives, and seemed solely interested in pushing pills—which I refused. I won't be returning to a psychiatrist again...

How can anyone claim psychology is just some useless bullshit?!

Look, I get it if you think some specific therapist is a total hack, or if you’ve hung out with those pseudo-intellectual types who love throwing around shallow psychoanalysis like they actually know something. But calling the entire field of psychology "trash"?

That’s like saying physiognomy—the idea that you can judge someone's character by their face—is just "basic nonsense."🤣

Angela Morris said:This is not an isolated occurrence. Ever since I began studying psychology as a young girl around age twelve or thirteen, consuming books in an attempt to improve myself... I find myself once again losing the will to live. Besides, life lacks inherent meaning...

Notice how people in love never stop to ask about the meaning of life.😉

Roger Fox56 said:Notice how people in love never stop to ask about the meaning of life.😉

Heh. My doctor actually told me to just find someone to fall in love with and all my problems would vanish. 🤷 Turns out she was just telling me I needed better sex! 😁

Roger Fox56 said:Notice how people in love never stop to ask about the meaning of life.😉

Well, I suppose I am the exception.
Even if that were true—one cannot remain in love forever...
And no, it isn't a matter of lacking affection or intimacy... It's simply that I have grown weary of the cliché.

Anonymous said:How can anyone claim psychology is just some useless bullshit?!

Look, I get it if you think some specific therapist is a total hack, or if you’ve hung out with those pseudo-intellectual types who love throwing around shallow psychoanalysis like they actually know something. But calling the entire field of psychology "trash"?

That’s like saying physiognomy—the idea that you can judge someone's character by their face—is just "basic nonsense."🤣

It is clear you did not read my introductory remarks...

Angela Morris said:It is clear you did not read my introductory remarks...

Okay, I’ve actually sat down and focused on reading this properly now.

Everything you see on TV or read in books is just a reflection of someone else's thoughts—it's someone else's creativity (and honestly, most people are getting way too rich off it these days).

Just because you see something doesn't mean you have to model your life after it or follow that exact same path.

Alright, time for a little bit of cheesy inspiration to wrap things up: you are the master of your own destiny.

Angela Morris said:I have worked on changing myself internally. Yet, everything always seems to revert to the old ways. It isn't a matter of repression; I have spoken openly about everything and owned my past. It is just... life feels profoundly senseless, and up until now, it has been nothing but painful. I cannot recall a single chapter of my life that wasn't marked by intense suffering. I don't intend to recount my entire life story here. I am simply wondering if anyone else has navigated a similar depression—how you managed to recover, and if recovery was ever truly permanent... That is all.

Life isn't meaningless. It's more like that bastard God rigged the game so we have to invent our own purpose. It's a cheap trick, sure, but at least you get to make the choice.

Life hurts. Sometimes it really does kick your teeth in. I don't have some magic cure, but personally, I'm way too stubborn to let life win.

Instead of throwing yourself under a bus, maybe try an adrenaline sport. Go skydiving or something. You get those little hits of mortality in a controlled setting, and it actually makes you want to stay alive.

Angela Morris said:I have just come to the realization that things may never truly improve. I spent years hoping to find some semblance of peace or happiness, but it remains elusive. I have read countless psychology books, attempted to adopt positive thinking, and worked extensively on myself... there are brief windows of progress, only for me to slide back into those same dark thoughts—the desire to simply not exist, the urge to end it all. (Though, perhaps I lack the courage for such an act, as the physical pain terrifies me; still, in those moments, I wouldn't mind if a car struck me in a crossing. My recklessness in traffic tends to increase during these periods...)
After so many attempts to force myself into being happy, satisfied, or free from fear... everything reverts to its original state. I am losing my faith that any change is possible. I have even watched documentaries on the subject. I saw a segment about someone with symptoms similar to mine undergoing electroconvulsive therapy—you know, the kind where they use 😛 electrical impulses. In movies, people with traumatic childhoods almost always end up as serial killers, seemingly beyond any help.
Is this actually how life works? Do the wounds we receive once never truly heal? Or is modern psychology merely suggesting that everything can be fixed...

Even if nothing else changes, all that effort you put into working on yourself and staying positive was worth it for those few months when you actually felt okay.
It's a shame you aren't more persistent.

brighteagle39 said:Even if nothing else changes, all that effort you put into working on yourself and staying positive was worth it for those few months when you actually felt okay.
It's a shame you aren't more persistent.

So, you believe I should continue working on myself even if it only yields a few good months? I am not certain. If that is truly all there is to it, then I suppose I will proceed. However, I was hoping for something more permanent... :-(

Angela Morris said:This is not an isolated occurrence. Ever since I began studying psychology as a young girl around age twelve or thirteen, consuming books in an attempt to improve myself... I find myself once again losing the will to live. Besides, life lacks inherent meaning...

Is it possible you've spent years constructing this idealized version of who you "should" be, rather than accepting who you actually are? Popular psychology books tend to oversimplify things... once you grasp the actual foundations and see where those "easy" fixes fall short, the whole thing starts to look a bit absurd and strangely written.

Life only holds as much meaning as you decide to give it.

As for that lingering melancholy—I went through a similar stretch for about four years. For me, the sense of purpose was always there, even if others couldn't see it through my eyes. I swung between deep sadness and bursts of joy, fluctuating constantly... until eventually, slowly, I began to see the world through a clearer lens. It wasn't overnight, but I learned to accept myself first, and then everyone else. Even though I never cared much for outside opinions back then, I make sure to speak my mind clearly now. I still work hard on many things, not because I consider myself particularly patient or tolerant, but because I find peace in looking back and seeing how everything unfolded. Sorry, I drifted a bit off-topic...

Hang in there.

Tyler Bishop56 said:Life isn't meaningless. It's more like that bastard God rigged the game so we have to invent our own purpose. It's a cheap trick, sure, but at least you get to make the choice.

Life hurts. Sometimes it really does kick your teeth in. I don't have some magic cure, but personally, I'm way too stubborn to let life win.

Instead of throwing yourself under a bus, maybe try an adrenaline sport. Go skydiving or something. You get those little hits of mortality in a controlled setting, and it actually makes you want to stay alive.

I've never been much of an athlete. Though, I occasionally wonder if I could have made it as a police officer ;-) but I suppose that's a man's game, and as a woman, I fear I wouldn't achieve much :-( Still, chasing criminals and facing a little risk just to come out on top sounds exciting :-) But then again, life isn't a movie...
Sports aren't really my thing, though I'd love to find one that actually appeals to me...

rustyfalcon52 said:Is it possible you've spent years constructing this idealized version of who you "should" be, rather than accepting who you actually are? Popular psychology books tend to oversimplify things... once you grasp the actual foundations and see where those "easy" fixes fall short, the whole thing starts to look a bit absurd and strangely written.

Life only holds as much meaning as you decide to give it.

As for that lingering melancholy—I went through a similar stretch for about four years. For me, the sense of purpose was always there, even if others couldn't see it through my eyes. I swung between deep sadness and bursts of joy, fluctuating constantly... until eventually, slowly, I began to see the world through a clearer lens. It wasn't overnight, but I learned to accept myself first, and then everyone else. Even though I never cared much for outside opinions back then, I make sure to speak my mind clearly now. I still work hard on many things, not because I consider myself particularly patient or tolerant, but because I find peace in looking back and seeing how everything unfolded. Sorry, I drifted a bit off-topic...

Hang in there.

I am unsure if I have created an idealized version of myself. The only ideal I strive for is simply being who I am. I do not force myself into situations that do not suit me, I do not lie, I remain honest, and I am not easily swayed... For instance, I will always do what I believe is right rather than conforming just to be accepted by the crowd... if you know what I mean. I endeavor to be honest with myself, rather than deceiving myself into believing I am someone I am not.

Anonymous said:Okay, I’ve actually sat down and focused on reading this properly now.

Everything you see on TV or read in books is just a reflection of someone else's thoughts—it's someone else's creativity (and honestly, most people are getting way too rich off it these days).

Just because you see something doesn't mean you have to model your life after it or follow that exact same path.

Alright, time for a little bit of cheesy inspiration to wrap things up: you are the master of your own destiny.

Yes, I realize happiness is a choice. But right now, that feels less like actual help and more like an empty platitude...

What's up?