Are people actually destroying our mental health?

I honestly feel like people in this world carry far too much influence over one another, especially since they seem to have no concept of the weight of their actions or the damage they can inflict. Take a former classmate of mine, for example. pick on him relentlessly, yet if I were to step in and defend him, I’d likely end up being targeted and insulted right along with him. I find myself searching for just one decent person—someone who actually understands the gravity of what they're doing—but there's nobody to be found... I look around and I simply can't believe it. It's baffling how people can be so incredibly thoughtless, failing to use even a shred of logic or consider how their behavior affects someone else. Out of a hundred people, I can't find a single soul with any empathy. Then I come home, replay the whole scene in my head, and wonder again. It makes me genuinely worried about where this country is headed.
Of course, I’ve been guilty of hurting someone before, but never for sport; it was driven by pure malice. Honestly, seeing someone suffer like that fills me with such intense regret that it feels as though the pain is happening to me personally.
Where are these people supposed to turn for help? To a psychiatrist who witnesses these exact scenarios every single day, amidst the tragic reality of the suicide rates we see, or should they just be left to rot? Try stepping into their shoes for a moment; imagine being mocked by everyone around you multiple times a day, and then have some stranger act like they just landed from outer space, acting shocked that people resort to suicide. I truly hope there are still enough good people left in America who actually think about the consequences of their actions.

honestly, I’m just glad I stumbled across you😉

Look, that’s just life, you know? Stuff like this is bound to happen, and honestly, it would be weirder if things were any different... The only real sting is feeling like you lost face in front of everyone. Just try to push through it and you'll see that things settle down later on... Of course, there will always be some assholes out there, but they definitely won't be as much as they were back in high school. College is really your first real chance to test that out

School is honestly a pretty brutal stretch of time 😢
Some kids might get completely crushed by it, but most—thankfully—make it through and come out stronger on the other side 😉

The kid needs to learn how to defend himself. If one of them just landed a solid punch right to the face, they probably wouldn't dare push him around again, even if he took a beating in the process.

gentlefox18 said:I honestly feel like people in this world carry far too much influence over one another, especially since they seem to have no concept of the weight of their actions or the damage they can inflict. Take a former classmate of mine, for example. pick on him relentlessly, yet if I were to step in and defend him, I’d likely end up being targeted and insulted right along with him. I find myself searching for just one decent person—someone who actually understands the gravity of what they're doing—but there's nobody to be found... I look around and I simply can't believe it. It's baffling how people can be so incredibly thoughtless, failing to use even a shred of logic or consider how their behavior affects someone else. Out of a hundred people, I can't find a single soul with any empathy. Then I come home, replay the whole scene in my head, and wonder again. It makes me genuinely worried about where this country is headed.
Of course, I’ve been guilty of hurting someone before, but never for sport; it was driven by pure malice. Honestly, seeing someone suffer like that fills me with such intense regret that it feels as though the pain is happening to me personally.
Where are these people supposed to turn for help? To a psychiatrist who witnesses these exact scenarios every single day, amidst the tragic reality of the suicide rates we see, or should they just be left to rot? Try stepping into their shoes for a moment; imagine being mocked by everyone around you multiple times a day, and then have some stranger act like they just landed from outer space, acting shocked that people resort to suicide. I truly hope there are still enough good people left in America who actually think about the consequences of their actions.

It’s honestly pathetic how you can only "make a name for yourself" by being slightly better than someone else, rather than just being the best version of yourself without stepping on anyone else to do it... you know what I mean? I guess...

Seriously, where is this world going? Even back in my own classroom, people like that were everywhere (I assume😉)

Jerry Morales4 said:The kid needs to learn how to defend himself. If one of them just landed a solid punch right to the face, they probably wouldn't dare push him around again, even if he took a beating in the process.

That’s true, but it’s honestly depressing that things have to be handled with fists. In 95% of cases, if you go around pummeling someone, you just end up attracting more trouble for yourself—you'll be stuck in meetings with the principal or the school counselor, and all that stuff just makes life even more miserable. Still, it feels much easier when I know that things might actually improve slightly after this happens...

Here we go again—another forum debate about how people try to "prove" things just to fit in with the crowd. It’s honestly pretty depressing that this is how society works, but then again, who can actually change it? 🤔

gentlefox18 said:I honestly feel like people in this world carry far too much influence over one another, especially since they seem to have no concept of the weight of their actions or the damage they can inflict. Take a former classmate of mine, for example. pick on him relentlessly, yet if I were to step in and defend him, I’d likely end up being targeted and insulted right along with him. I find myself searching for just one decent person—someone who actually understands the gravity of what they're doing—but there's nobody to be found... I look around and I simply can't believe it. It's baffling how people can be so incredibly thoughtless, failing to use even a shred of logic or consider how their behavior affects someone else. Out of a hundred people, I can't find a single soul with any empathy. Then I come home, replay the whole scene in my head, and wonder again. It makes me genuinely worried about where this country is headed.
Of course, I’ve been guilty of hurting someone before, but never for sport; it was driven by pure malice. Honestly, seeing someone suffer like that fills me with such intense regret that it feels as though the pain is happening to me personally.
Where are these people supposed to turn for help? To a psychiatrist who witnesses these exact scenarios every single day, amidst the tragic reality of the suicide rates we see, or should they just be left to rot? Try stepping into their shoes for a moment; imagine being mocked by everyone around you multiple times a day, and then have some stranger act like they just landed from outer space, acting shocked that people resort to suicide. I truly hope there are still enough good people left in America who actually think about the consequences of their actions.

This isn't just bad, it's pathetic.😢
You watch it happen and you can't believe there's nobody—literally nobody—who would stand up for him or call out the bullies😕
Just grow up, man. It should be easy.
You say if you defended him, they'd just flip on you and insult you too.
And I'm guessing you aren't really doing anything about it, at least not actively.
And then you act surprised by the kind of people out there.
Right now, in your class (in this world), there are probably at least 5 or 6 other people feeling exactly like you do, but they aren't doing a damn thing either.
Because by being passive (just like everyone else around you), you're basically telling them you're "one of them"—part of a society where this stuff is just "fine."
And now you're shocked.
If you've got the guts, do something. You'll probably see that almost nobody will back you up (like, 99.9% of people won't), but at least you'll know you're above them.
Even if you end up looking like a total loser...☕
Yeah, you'll look like some jerk defending a nobody, but at least when life gets heavy later on and you're raising your own kid, you'll remember you acted like a decent human being.
That matters way more than your "street cred" in whatever sick school you're stuck in right now.

Grace Wilson72 said:This isn't just bad, it's pathetic.😢
You watch it happen and you can't believe there's nobody—literally nobody—who would stand up for him or call out the bullies😕
Just grow up, man. It should be easy.
You say if you defended him, they'd just flip on you and insult you too.
And I'm guessing you aren't really doing anything about it, at least not actively.
And then you act surprised by the kind of people out there.
Right now, in your class (in this world), there are probably at least 5 or 6 other people feeling exactly like you do, but they aren't doing a damn thing either.
Because by being passive (just like everyone else around you), you're basically telling them you're "one of them"—part of a society where this stuff is just "fine."
And now you're shocked.
If you've got the guts, do something. You'll probably see that almost nobody will back you up (like, 99.9% of people won't), but at least you'll know you're above them.
Even if you end up looking like a total loser...☕
Yeah, you'll look like some jerk defending a nobody, but at least when life gets heavy later on and you're raising your own kid, you'll remember you acted like a decent human being.
That matters way more than your "street cred" in whatever sick school you're stuck in right now.

I've already tried twice, but things went exactly how you predicted. Me—the idiot.
The others—everything stayed the same. I used to think just like you; they don't want to take the first step, so I thought I would. Maybe they think it’s wrong, just like I do, but no—they just mocked me.
But I've become immune to their behavior, which was, to put it mildly, cruel.

It’s just how it works... when there's a crowd watching, nobody wants to step up and actually do anything. It's a proven fact.
I don't know... maybe try talking to him privately? Pull him aside somewhere quiet and tell him he needs to wake up. He needs to start standing his ground and taking action. I can't give specific advice because I don't know the full details of what's happening, but at the end of the day, a man has to look out for himself. You can support him and advocate for him, sure, but that's only a temporary fix.
...I'm speaking from personal experience here. Nobody sat me down and explained this to me; I had to learn the hard way.

You have my 👍. Honestly, I'm wondering why you even bothered bringing this topic to the forum in the first place...

gentlefox18 said:That’s true, but it’s honestly depressing that things have to be handled with fists. In 95% of cases, if you go around pummeling someone, you just end up attracting more trouble for yourself—you'll be stuck in meetings with the principal or the school counselor, and all that stuff just makes life even more miserable. Still, it feels much easier when I know that things might actually improve slightly after this happens...

He doesn't necessarily have to beat him up; a solid shove might do the trick. They have to defend themselves, I suppose. I've never really understood people who just sit there and take it.🙄 Talking to a principal or a counselor is usually just a bunch of nonsense meant to shut down anyone pointing out constant bullying.
Then again, humans are animals at their core. That's just the beginning; you eventually see how far people will go just to get ahead or satisfy some weird impulse.

gentlefox18 said:I've already tried twice, but things went exactly how you predicted. Me—the idiot.
The others—everything stayed the same. I used to think just like you; they don't want to take the first step, so I thought I would. Maybe they think it’s wrong, just like I do, but no—they just mocked me.
But I've become immune to their behavior, which was, to put it mildly, cruel.

You tried. It didn't go the way you wanted, whatever. Don't sweat it too much.
It's just the law of the jungle. Eat or be eaten😕 or kill or be... anyway...
The whole point of this story is what separates us from animals; feelings.
You showed some empathy, which just proves you're someone worth respecting.
others can do whatever they want, always, but there's ALWAYS going to be some weak link for everyone to take their crap out on.
The main thing is that YOU aren't part of that mindless mob and you know where the line for humanity is. Something those types really lack.
You actually made my day. Honestly, proud to see people who will actually stand up for someone. Whether you're defending someone or just talking to a jerk, even if everyone else wonders why you're bothering.
You know why, and that's what matters.😉

Jerry Morales4 said:He doesn't necessarily have to beat him up; a solid shove might do the trick. They have to defend themselves, I suppose. I've never really understood people who just sit there and take it.🙄 Talking to a principal or a counselor is usually just a bunch of nonsense meant to shut down anyone pointing out constant bullying.
Then again, humans are animals at their core. That's just the beginning; you eventually see how far people will go just to get ahead or satisfy some weird impulse.

I honestly think they stay quiet because they just don't have any confidence in themselves, which happens way more often than you'd think... and man, it's heartbreaking when you watch someone let others walk all over them or believe total lies about themselves, I just can't wrap my head around people who treat others like that, they're just straight-up fools...👎
And usually, those types who keep it all inside eventually just snap after a while, so it's probably better for him to have someone to vent to, someone who'll actually step up and look out for him.

OP, you basically answered your own question: people are just stupid. If most people actually knew what they were doing, they wouldn't be doing it. That stupidity breeds malice, a complete lack of character, and this desperate obsession with ideologies and the need to belong to some bloodthirsty tribe just to feel validated.
If someone isn't just plain stupid, then they’re clearly mentally disturbed if they actually get a kick out of watching someone else suffer.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right? Bulling isn't anything new, unfortunately, and it's something the American school system absolutely should be tackling head-on, but most of the time, nothing is being done at all. Still, society is becoming more aware of how much kids and teenagers are being physically and—more often—mentally tormented by their peers. It's basic herd mentality: if two kids decide to pick on one person and they have the upper hand, others will jump on the bandwagon just to join in. Kids can be way more cruel and vicious than adults, yet we often try to excuse it because they're "just kids" or "still developing." I mean, sure, that's partially true, but it’s also a cop-out. There is far too much human garbage in this world for us to ignore these issues; we need to identify and address these problems early on during childhood, providing real solutions for the aggressors, the victims, and society as a whole.

Hey man,
seriously though, what is even the deal with why everyone keeps making fun of him?

Andrew Ramos10 said:Hey man,
seriously though, what is even the deal with why everyone keeps making fun of him?

That’s a pointless question. Is there actually any valid reason to mock someone when the whole point of the mockery is just to hurt them? Just because he doesn't fit some standard stereotype like everyone else, does that suddenly give people a green light to stomp all over him? They target him simply because they think they can get away with it and they enjoy the feeling of power.

Sarah Wood8 said:That’s a pointless question. Is there actually any valid reason to mock someone when the whole point of the mockery is just to hurt them? Just because he doesn't fit some standard stereotype like everyone else, does that suddenly give people a green light to stomp all over him? They target him simply because they think they can get away with it and they enjoy the feeling of power.

I remember this one guy in my high school class back in the States who was totally obsessed with PC gaming—all about shooters, gore, and he even had some really twisted ideas involving historical dictators. He lived entirely in his own little sci-fi fantasy world, drawing aliens all over his notebooks and being obsessed with weaponry.
Everyone used to rip on him because, frankly, he acted like a complete idiot sometimes.
You'd ask him a simple question and he’d act like a total jerk, pulling some stupid stunt and then making a ridiculous face while letting out a massive "AAAAAA!"

And now, the rest of the class is just lost; they kept mocking him because there were moments where he genuinely looked tragically hilarious...

Sometimes, being teased can actually act as a bit of a wake-up call, helping someone realize how badly they're messing up. If we all just spent our lives coddling one another, the world would be an absolute mess because the capable people would just end up catering to the weak ones...

Evolution is doing its thing whether we want to admit it or not—we are part of that process, not some kind of merciful deities or whatever else you want to call it...

...dear DG...what happens when those illusions finally shatter??? Maturity, I suppose...
People are, unfortunately, a corrupt race...it’s better to accept that sooner rather than later, otherwise they'll just start stepping on you. In this day and age, kindness doesn't really carry much weight...
...sadly, I'm speaking from experience...you just have to know who you are and what you stand for...

So yeah, that’s just how it goes... it’s all part of growing up, I guess. For some people, it’s a breeze, but for someone like your friend, it’s a total nightmare. Most folks manage to scrape through the minor stuff, but the heavy hits? Not so much. And once it's over, nobody even asks how you're doing. Eventually, you just build up a tolerance. You develop these defense mechanisms, pull inward, shut everyone out... whatever it takes to keep from falling apart. It makes you tougher, sure, but the scars stay. There's really no fix for it. People like that probably need therapists, but... well, if they had actually lived through it themselves, maybe they'd be any good at it. I know from experience. At this point, there isn't much left for you to do.
Just try not to let him down when things get real, assuming you actually consider him a friend.