Dealing with homosexuality in the family: How to handle it?

Calling all parents of LGBTQ+ kids—step up to the mic
I really want to hear what you guys are thinking about this

it’s kind of wild how not a single parent is actually stepping up here, don't you think?

So, I guess I was right all along

The real issue starts at home

It’s all about the parents

I look around and see how many young guys today are basically destined to be gay

Their families are just totally broken up

You’ve got these kids living with their moms until they're twenty

They’re missing that father figure entirely

Of course they end up turning gay—they never had a dad around, and the mom is just... well, she's doing too much

Samuel Nelson24 said:I was watching Sasha on ABC the other day talking about gay people, and I really liked what this one guy said—basically, you aren't born gay, you become gay later on.

It’s kind of like how nobody is born a schizophrenic or an alcoholic, right?
That stuff develops as you go through life.

Personally, I think he hit the nail on the head
and that everything boils down to the family dynamic—you know, the psychological side of things and how kids are raised.

It’s a bummer that they didn't bring any parents of gay kids onto the show to talk.

I feel like we really ought to be asking parents about their upbringing styles and how they handled things at home.

Like, do any of these gay guys actually have a healthy, solid relationship with both their mom and dad?

In my opinion, anyone who ends up being gay is dealing with some kind of trauma from their childhood—whether it's something they're aware of or just some repressed thing buried deep down—and that’s where the root of it all lies.

A little five-year-old boy could experience a trauma if, say, his father passes away and he grows up without him, leaving him with just a super dominant mother.

Down the road, that could lead to him being gay.

I could probably come up with a ton of other examples.
For instance, maybe a four-year-old girl is being seduced by her dad through certain words, looks, or gestures... (and I don't necessarily mean physical assault), which just makes her lose all respect for men entirely.

What do you guys reckon?

Honestly, it sounds like you might need a hobby. 👎

A quick word for those wading through the shallow end of psychology: homosexuality was considered perfectly normal long before 1973.
Maybe pick up a history book once in a while.

Carl Ruiz4 said:Honestly, it sounds like you might need a hobby. 👎

A quick word for those wading through the shallow end of psychology: homosexuality was considered perfectly normal long before 1973.
Maybe pick up a history book once in a while.

And here you are, acting like some grand leader of a bunch of wise-cracking gays...

Carl Ruiz4 said:Honestly, it sounds like you might need a hobby. 👎

A quick word for those wading through the shallow end of psychology: homosexuality was considered perfectly normal long before 1973.
Maybe pick up a history book once in a while.

Thinking too hard is exhausting, man.

I’m out here living my best life, seriously.

But hey, quick question for you:
Do you think pedophilia will be seen as "normal" by 2073?

Because back in the Netherlands in 2003, they actually had people try to start their own political party for it.

Samuel Nelson24 said:So, I guess I was right all along

The real issue starts at home

It’s all about the parents

I look around and see how many young guys today are basically destined to be gay

Their families are just totally broken up

You’ve got these kids living with their moms until they're twenty

They’re missing that father figure entirely

Of course they end up turning gay—they never had a dad around, and the mom is just... well, she's doing too much

That doesn't necessarily hold up. I know plenty of guys from Chicago who grew up without fathers and aren't gay. Same goes for guys with divorced parents who aren't gay either.

People have tried forever to prove that idea—you know, the whole "no father, dominant mother" nonsense—but it’s NEVER been proven. There isn't even a shred of evidence to back up that garbage...

Samuel Nelson24 said:it’s kind of wild how not a single parent is actually stepping up here, don't you think?

I suppose the older generations are just too busy living their lives, probably caught up in the endless cycle of making dinner and keeping up with the laundry.☕

redharbor9 said:People have tried forever to prove that idea—you know, the whole "no father, dominant mother" nonsense—but it’s NEVER been proven. There isn't even a shred of evidence to back up that garbage...

See, that's exactly why I've been noticing so many patterns in people I know

and I really think I can lay out my theory and prove it works.

And how exactly are you gonna prove that theory?

I’ve never really had any issues within my family—honestly, we’ve always been incredibly tight. My dad even tells me he’d go to bat for me any day (and I’m only 18!)—he isn't shy about telling me he loves me or that I’m his whole world. He’s quite sensitive when it comes to family stuff and has always worked his tail off to give me everything he possibly could. Same goes for my mom—and my sisters, too. If I’m being totally honest, I might be a little spoiled. I am gay, though I don't think my parents ever did anything to "make" me this way—it’s just who I’ve been for as long as I can remember. I'm not entirely sure how they'll react, since I don't really fit any of those typical stereotypes, but knowing them as I do—even if my dad jokes about disowning me (which I know is just talk)—I think they’d handle it beautifully.

The funniest part is hearing people claim they don't want them anywhere near them....hehehhe....here’s a little piece of advice for you....DON'T LEAVE YOUR ROOM and watch who walks through that door...because who knows...maybe your brother is gay....maybe your dad....your mom.....you never truly know...There's even a decent chance it could be your kid...So if you really don't want anyone like that in your vicinity, stay inside and guard your front door....or better yet.....kick everyone out until you're 100% certain they aren't gay.....though you'll probably never actually know...
later =)

James Allen6 said:I find myself largely in agreement with the original poster (though I am not particularly fond of that specific TV show).
From what I have observed, nearly all gay individuals I know grew up in households where certain fundamental elements were missing—perhaps they were raised by a single parent, or maybe there was significant friction between their parents.
I would not go so far as to call it a disease, though I suppose one could view it as some type of disorder. I don't hold any animosity toward gay people (except, perhaps, for those who feel the need to be exhibitionists in public), but I suspect only they truly understand the circumstances that led them here. To suggest that being gay and being straight are identical is, I think, a bit of a delusion, as nature seems to indicate something quite different.
That said, I genuinely want everyone to find happiness, even if that path involves a same-sex relationship. However, I believe people should recognize and accept their own uniqueness rather than treating sexual orientation as an interchangeable choice. After all, we aren't animals; I guess what draws us to others is primarily an emotional connection rather than just a sexual one.

There is quite a bit written here that I find myself disagreeing with, but this specific point feels particularly unconvincing to me.🤣

Samuel Nelson24 said:So, I guess I was right all along

The real issue starts at home

It’s all about the parents

I look around and see how many young guys today are basically destined to be gay

Their families are just totally broken up

You’ve got these kids living with their moms until they're twenty

They’re missing that father figure entirely

Of course they end up turning gay—they never had a dad around, and the mom is just... well, she's doing too much

😂😂🤣🤣 That is just brilliant!! I suppose your worldview is incredibly simple! 🤣🤣

Gary James88 said:Science still hasn't fully cracked the code on homosexuality, but the conversation is shifting. People aren't talking about upbringing nearly as much as they are about genetic and hormonal drivers. That’s likely where the real answers lie.

Since homosexuality was stripped from the DSM back in 1973, the scientific consensus has been clear: it isn't a disorder or an illness. Because of that, there's really no point in pushing therapies or lecturing parents on how to "fix" it.

There was this one case involving a young boy who suffered severe genital damage during surgery. His parents agreed to have his male anatomy completely removed and replaced with female organs, intending to raise him as a girl through hormone therapy. Things got complicated during puberty, though—the child started feeling more like a boy, struggling with their identity, and eventually transitioned back to their biological sex. It just goes to show the limits of parenting; you can't force a personality into a mold you've designed.

I think we’re talking about the exact same situation here. From what I understand, the issue wasn't just the surgery itself—it was that the parents were essentially paid off, weren't they? They took Money to let that scientist run an experiment to prove his theory that a child's sexual orientation is purely a product of how they are raised... Can you imagine? When that kid hit puberty, he realized he was male, and he was relentlessly mocked by everyone around him because he was being raised as a girl. He felt attracted to women, so once he became an adult, he underwent surgery to return to his original sex. The ultimate tragedy, though—and it's heartbreaking—is that he couldn't have children with the woman he married. And then... well, he took his own life. I don't know exactly how or why, but he ended it. To make matters worse, when his sibling found out the truth about their identity, the trauma was so overwhelming that they spiraled into alcoholism, drug abuse, and schizophrenia before also committing suicide... The parents were left totally alone, just two hollow shells of people living in isolation. And the doctor? He faced zero accountability for what was essentially a crime; he still clings to his theories, stubbornly insisting he was right despite this outcome proving he was dead wrong. Honestly, people like those parents and that doctor... they deserve the harshest possible justice.😠

When David Reimer was just 7 months old, a routine circumcision went horribly wrong and destroyed his penis. Instead of fixing the physical issue, Dr. Money, a psychologist, suggested raising him as a girl instead.

The parents went along with it and tried, but he never wanted to be a girl. He wrote while standing up, played boy games, and hated dresses. Once he hit puberty, everything fell apart and he finally came clean. He eventually returned to his birth sex and found happiness with a family...

Punishing Money is an interesting idea... (he actually passed away recently). In 100 years, people like us will probably be debating today's medicine and arguing that doctors like this should face criminal charges. Back then, nobody knew anything about this topic; they couldn't have predicted how it would all end. It’s a revolutionary case that opened up endless new insights, even if that wasn't the intention...

Now, the fact that Money refused to admit he failed and essentially terrorized the kid is a different story. You can look at it as pure ego, or maybe just a desperate attempt to make his theory work...

David Reimer took his own life in May 2004, though apparently there were other factors involved besides just what happened to him...

And honestly? This case isn't even about sexual orientation—it's about gender. It proves that gender is hardwired into the brain from birth, not something you learn.

I haven't been keeping up with this thread from the very beginning, but I have a few colleagues who are bisexual, and honestly, some who are gay too, and it really strikes me how people who have never actually hung out with anyone like that—not even for a single hour—feel entitled to spout such nonsense on internet forums!

To be perfectly blunt, I’d just call that pure primitivism!

If you take a quick look around at what's happening in America right now, you'll see we have Pride parades and all sorts of events, and it’s not like those people are out there attacking you just because you happen to be straight... If seeing two women together or two men together genuinely bothers you that much, then honestly, just look the other way and keep walking. I truly don't get the intense, aggressive fighting and the constant vitriol just because someone is different.

Think about it: tomorrow, your own child could turn out to be gay, yet here you are today, hating them and spitting on them. You never truly know what the future holds for your own home or your own family!

The reality is that this has always existed; it's just that nowadays there's more awareness about identity and how people live their lives, so it's only people who are actually tuned in who can truly understand and see the nuance, whereas "average" folks just see what they want to see...

Later!

Well, that’s certainly your right to feel that way. As for me, my own perspective is simply that homosexuality is a type of disorder or illness—or more accurately, just something that deviates from what I consider the norm, which is the average state of things. And honestly, I don't see any issue with holding that view... it's just how I see the world.

Am I being primitive by thinking this way? Maybe I am, at least according to anyone who disagrees with me. But everyone is entitled to their own opinion, no matter how controversial or "sick" it might seem to others, as long as they aren't trying to force those beliefs on anyone else.

And even if I had a child who happened to be gay, why on earth would you expect me to suddenly change my mind about it??

Trust me, I didn't choose this; I've been gay since birth. Even as a kid, I realized I was looking at guys differently than girls. I'd do just about anything to be straight.