Schizophrenia - General Discussion

Poor kid

Larry Lewis said:Poor kid

Feel free to elaborate; I believe diverse experiences are valuable, even from an observer's perspective.😉

rapiddriver23 said:Hey there

My brother’s been dealing with schizoaffective disorder for about ten years now—he just turned 35. Over the last couple of years, things have gotten really rough; he’s constantly cycling through different meds and just can't seem to find any stability. Honestly, even basic hygiene is a struggle—I basically have to tell him how to take care of himself. He doesn't really have a social life, and hasn't had a girlfriend since he first got sick. Our dad passed away two years ago, and my mom is disabled, so I’m constantly spiraling thinking... if he can't stay steady, what happens to him when she's gone? He isn't working—partly because he can't get stable due to the paranoia, and partly because he has zero income.
What does this mean for my own life? I'm at that stage where I'm thinking about starting my own family soon. But every single day—and I mean every day—I'm worrying about him. Will I end up being his sole caregiver for the rest of my life? Would his behavior eventually drive me insane? (And yeah, I know that sounds selfish, but it's how I feel.) The brother I used to know has been gone for years. It’s honestly making me slip into a depression myself; even when I'm out grabbing coffee with friends, my mind just drifts to him and everything he's facing. I am terrified, and I don't see any way out. I'm scared he'll end up homeless, or that he'll start self-medicating with alcohol so heavily that we'll find him passed out on the sidewalk.

Has anyone else gone through something like this?

I have a situation that’s somewhat similar yet quite different. In my family, everyone is a little "unbalanced," including myself. I live with my mother and my grandmother. Even though my grandmother is still relatively vital, she’s elderly and could pass away at any moment. My mother is younger and lives with schizophrenia, but she's completely inactive, and lately, she's developed diabetes due to her weight. While diabetes can stem from many things, she really struggled with her weight. She's on a diet now, so hopefully things improve, but she just won't move; she's too lethargic to even chop wood, so my grandmother handles that. As for me, I also have schizophrenia, but thank God, I’ve been in a pretty solid remission for over three years now. Do I worry about my mom after my grandmother passes? Not excessively. I’ll help her, just as I do now, but I refuse to sacrifice my entire life for her. She didn't bring me into this world to be her caretaker, but to live my own life.
It sounds like you're in a similar spot. Help your brother, certainly, but please set some boundaries. I truly believe he has the capacity to do a lot on his own. It seems to me that his current struggles are largely because he keeps stopping his treatment. He is capable of taking his medication two or three times a day, and honestly, no one can force him to get better if he isn't willing to do the work himself.
You mentioned your mother is also disabled. What's her situation like? Maybe talk to her; I suspect she might actually be able to play a role in helping your brother find some momentum.

I was reading some research suggesting that people actually tend to exhibit more aggressive behavior after consuming alcohol than they do during a full-blown psychotic episode.

What’s everyone's take on this—does it sound plausible to you guys?

driftinggull21 said:Feel free to elaborate; I believe diverse experiences are valuable, even from an observer's perspective.😉

It feels almost ungrateful—if you can even call it that—to attempt to write about this particular affliction, given how uniquely it manifests in every single soul; there isn’t some magic, universal remedy to make a person feel whole again. But I will say this much—and I mean this with absolute sincerity—if that young man is left to navigate this alone, without a solid foundation of support or genuine empathy, then he’s in for a brutal uphill battle. It’s a grim reality, frankly, but one we can't ignore.

rapiddriver23 said:Hey there

My brother’s been dealing with schizoaffective disorder for about ten years now—he just turned 35. Over the last couple of years, things have gotten really rough; he’s constantly cycling through different meds and just can't seem to find any stability. Honestly, even basic hygiene is a struggle—I basically have to tell him how to take care of himself. He doesn't really have a social life, and hasn't had a girlfriend since he first got sick. Our dad passed away two years ago, and my mom is disabled, so I’m constantly spiraling thinking... if he can't stay steady, what happens to him when she's gone? He isn't working—partly because he can't get stable due to the paranoia, and partly because he has zero income.
What does this mean for my own life? I'm at that stage where I'm thinking about starting my own family soon. But every single day—and I mean every day—I'm worrying about him. Will I end up being his sole caregiver for the rest of my life? Would his behavior eventually drive me insane? (And yeah, I know that sounds selfish, but it's how I feel.) The brother I used to know has been gone for years. It’s honestly making me slip into a depression myself; even when I'm out grabbing coffee with friends, my mind just drifts to him and everything he's facing. I am terrified, and I don't see any way out. I'm scared he'll end up homeless, or that he'll start self-medicating with alcohol so heavily that we'll find him passed out on the sidewalk.

Has anyone else gone through something like this?

rapiddriver23

I don't have a sibling struggling with mental illness, but I do have a father, and perhaps I can offer some advice.
The situation you are facing is heavy, but you must prioritize yourself. I don't mean you should abandon your brother or stop caring for him, but you absolutely have to live your own life.

Worrying about what might happen in a future that may never even arrive is a futile exercise. You cannot predict the trajectory of his life or how things will evolve. Things could stabilize for both of you, or they could take a turn for the worse. You will have to deal with those realities when they actually arrive.

Again, focus on yourself. If you succumb to the weight of this anxiety—whether it manifests as depression, anxiety, or panic attacks—you won't be in any position to help him at all. I highly doubt your brother would want you to sacrifice your own happiness and a normal life just to dedicate yourself entirely to his care.

I understand that you are scared and that this is incredibly difficult, but try to hold onto the hope that things can work out. If the burden becomes too much to carry alone, please consider speaking with a professional.

P.S. An old colleague from college went through a nearly identical situation; she has an older sister who suffered a severe mental breakdown, and they also lost their father a few years back. Her mother is currently the primary caregiver, but the question of the future looms large. Both her father's passing and her sister's illness happened around the same time, and she was left to manage everything while raising two young children. It was a choice between sinking or swimming. She chose to swim. It has been immensely hard for her, yes, but she told me herself that she had to live her own life. And living doesn't mean suffering for a crisis that hasn't even happened yet.

Thanks to everyone who chimed in.
Maybe I’m just naturally more of a pessimist—it’s honestly tough for me to try and convince myself that everything’s gonna be okay. I feel pretty terrible lately... there isn't a single day where I don't spiral thinking about whether I'll have a relapse, or if I go out for a walk, if I'll actually make it back home alive.
I can't help but wonder, how am I supposed to expect my current guy to stay by my side and raise kids with me when this constant anxiety is always going to be part of who I am? It feels like I'd just be the one thing breaking his perfect life... 🙂

So, I didn't end up getting pummeled over the Christmas break... which means things are actually peaceful. Christmas itself passed by with about five different kinds of cookies—I just couldn't muster the energy to bake more—some French wine, two pine trees, everything looking sharp both inside and out. A post for Christmas Eve. A mountain of food for Christmas Day. I had guests over for five days straight, and they stuck around even after that. We rang in New Year's Day at home with two loyal friends. Since January 1st, I've been diving headfirst back into work like a hungry mule, and naturally, I’ve already hit the clearance sales for clothes and other bits and pieces. I'm thinking about doing some "normal" things now, most likely heading out for a ski trip, and so life carries on. All in all, it was a lovely Christmas because, for the first time in six years, no relatives decided to crash on our couch for several days. Some friends have been complimenting me, saying I'm doing great, and everyone seems to understand that I've taken my husband back and given him another shot. For the first time in a while, reality feels manageable; I don't have much trouble dealing with other people's standards—or rather, I handle them using my own metrics, though that's been the case for a while now so it's mostly just become accepted. I went in for a checkup, and my doctor told me that since the therapy has been adjusted so effectively, the heavy lifting is largely done, and I could theoretically avoid ever being hospitalized again if I put in the effort. It's funny how I can clearly handle actual, tangible problems, yet struggle so much with the ones I've conjured up myself. Anyway, a belated Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2013 to us crazies and the rest of the neurotic, mentally healthy population. I use that word "crazy" often because that's how people talk—like saying "he's nuts." I doubt anyone uses terms like "psychotic" in casual conversation; you'd hear "schizophrenic," sure, but not that. I see I've become obsessed with my own subject matter again. 😉

rapiddriver23 said:Thanks to everyone who chimed in.
Maybe I’m just naturally more of a pessimist—it’s honestly tough for me to try and convince myself that everything’s gonna be okay. I feel pretty terrible lately... there isn't a single day where I don't spiral thinking about whether I'll have a relapse, or if I go out for a walk, if I'll actually make it back home alive.
I can't help but wonder, how am I supposed to expect my current guy to stay by my side and raise kids with me when this constant anxiety is always going to be part of who I am? It feels like I'd just be the one thing breaking his perfect life... 🙂

You really only have two paths here: either he stays in a mental health facility—where you both can visit one another and maintain that connection—or he moves in with you and your husband. I realize it won't always be easy, obviously, but isn't that the whole point of marriage? "In sickness and in health" and all that—it’s practically baked into the vows. If he’s a genuinely good man who truly loves you, I suppose it shouldn't feel like such an overwhelming sacrifice.

As far as benefits go, I suppose he should be eligible for some kind of financial assistance. I have an uncle who deals with schizoid disorder, and he receives a certain amount through... $867.

Gary Martinez11 said:You really only have two paths here: either he stays in a mental health facility—where you both can visit one another and maintain that connection—or he moves in with you and your husband. I realize it won't always be easy, obviously, but isn't that the whole point of marriage? "In sickness and in health" and all that—it’s practically baked into the vows. If he’s a genuinely good man who truly loves you, I suppose it shouldn't feel like such an overwhelming sacrifice.

As far as benefits go, I suppose he should be eligible for some kind of financial assistance. I have an uncle who deals with schizoid disorder, and he receives a certain amount through... $867.

I'm not entirely sure how your uncle qualified for his benefits, but my mom lives with schizophrenia, and after fifteen years in the workforce, her Social Security checks come out to roughly $500.

Gregory Taylor69 said:Everything in my life up until now—the years, the highs, the lows—seemed to move along steadily. Things just passed on their own, and I kept moving forward. But after this recent event, I couldn't find my footing. I built my entire world around one person, and I simply couldn't handle the breakup. I ended up alone in the silence of my room, and my thoughts eventually burned me out. I haven't hurt anyone or myself, even though the urge to end it all was incredibly strong. Losing her felt like my whole world collapsed, and I honestly don't know how to explain some of this. The only place I feel secure is in my bed. I don't hear voices when I'm alone. Physically, I feel completely drained, like I’ve been through a war. My head hums constantly; there’s this electrical sensation whenever I sit down and then stand up or turn my head. Nothing feels certain anymore. Absolutely nothing. Throughout all of this, I just stayed silent, wondering what was happening to me. I am fully aware of everything, even though I feel like screaming. All I plan to do is schedule a private MRI for my brain in a few days. If they tell me everything is fine, I will see a psychiatrist. I realize that the lump in my throat, the sweating, and the shaking are symptoms of anxiety, but that moment when I looked at my hand and felt certain it wasn't mine... I can't explain that. I would be happiest if no one touched me for ten years so I could just sit in my room by myself. But that isn't living. Still, I feel like running until I pass out or just starting to scream. I simply cannot trust my emotions. I can't get angry, I can't feel joy, I can't feel anything. I am not sure of anything.

I’ve experienced that feeling where your body feels like a stranger, even while you're still in control of it—from using ketamine. I've also had those full out-of-body experiences and near-death experiences, even though I wasn't actually in any physical danger.
It sounds like what's happening is a result of blocked NMDA receptors (those are the ones people mess with when they use Ecstasy to try and feel that sense of love, trust, and connection with others). When that signal completely shuts off, consciousness just... detaches itself from you.

Ketamine is used as an anesthetic, anyway (because of those "hallucinogenic" effects, it hasn't been used much on humans for a long time, though it is used on animals). That anesthetic effect is actually attributed to the way it separates consciousness from the body.

Maybe you're suffering from "separation depression." Because you probably went through a really intense initiation—you said you didn't detach, but reading this, it seems pretty clear to me what kind of psychological fallout is coming.
You became dependent on your girlfriend and that specific feeling you got when you were with her. I've been there too. I couldn't sleep at night unless she was with me, for whatever reason. I couldn't think, work, or hang out with anyone else... because I fell in love while I was in a deeply depressed state, and the result is this kind of emotional addiction.

Anyway, just try to become aware of what's happening so you can recover. You went through a heavy emotional depression that hit the level of total darkness at the NMDA receptors.

In my opinion, this isn't schizophrenia or anything like that.

I'm no psychiatrist, by the way. But I think I'm hitting the nail on the head here.

Either go to a psychiatrist or try to deal with it yourself—you can handle it... especially once you understand the actual, no-nonsense physical mechanisms of how the brain works, rather than all that self-help nonsense. (Though, I guess once you understand the actual biology, you realize most self-help advice actually makes sense; we just don't trust it because it's usually written like a Hare Krishna pamphlet or something.)

To start with, maybe try taking some St. John's Wort, like maybe two or three tablets a day... and other supplements. I'd probably suggest glutamate too, though I haven't read a ton about NMDA receptors or that whole thing specifically...

Maybe try leaning on a little bit of chemistry, you know? Like, just getting a better handle on how those mental mechanisms actually work inside your head... and then maybe, just maybe, you can find a way through it.

Gregory Taylor69 said:Everything in my life up until now—the years, the highs, the lows—seemed to move along steadily. Things just passed on their own, and I kept moving forward. But after this recent event, I couldn't find my footing. I built my entire world around one person, and I simply couldn't handle the breakup. I ended up alone in the silence of my room, and my thoughts eventually burned me out. I haven't hurt anyone or myself, even though the urge to end it all was incredibly strong. Losing her felt like my whole world collapsed, and I honestly don't know how to explain some of this. The only place I feel secure is in my bed. I don't hear voices when I'm alone. Physically, I feel completely drained, like I’ve been through a war. My head hums constantly; there’s this electrical sensation whenever I sit down and then stand up or turn my head. Nothing feels certain anymore. Absolutely nothing. Throughout all of this, I just stayed silent, wondering what was happening to me. I am fully aware of everything, even though I feel like screaming. All I plan to do is schedule a private MRI for my brain in a few days. If they tell me everything is fine, I will see a psychiatrist. I realize that the lump in my throat, the sweating, and the shaking are symptoms of anxiety, but that moment when I looked at my hand and felt certain it wasn't mine... I can't explain that. I would be happiest if no one touched me for ten years so I could just sit in my room by myself. But that isn't living. Still, I feel like running until I pass out or just starting to scream. I simply cannot trust my emotions. I can't get angry, I can't feel joy, I can't feel anything. I am not sure of anything.

I've experienced perceiving my own body as something foreign, even while I could still control it—from using ketamine. I've also had a total out-of-body experience and a near-death experience (even though I wasn't actually in mortal danger).
The state you're in is probably a result of blocked NMDA receptors (those are the ones people mess with using ecstasy to feel that sense of love, trust, and connection with others). When their signal shuts off completely, consciousness basically "unplugs" from your actual self.

Ketamine is used as an anesthetic, anyway (because of those "hallucinogenic" effects, it hasn't been used much on humans for a long time, though they still use it on animals). Its anesthetic effect is actually attributed to specifically separating consciousness from the body.

It sounds like you're suffering from "separation depression." Since you likely went through a really intense initiation (you mentioned you didn't detach, but reading this, the psychological fallout seems pretty obvious to me).
You became dependent on your girlfriend and that specific feeling you get when you're with her. And I've been there too. I couldn't sleep at night unless she was with me, for various reasons. I couldn't think, work, or even hang out with anyone else... because I fell in love while in a very, very depressed state, which leads to affective addiction.

Basically, you just need to become aware of what's happening to you so you can recover. You've gone through a heavy emotional depression to the point where your NMDA receptors have hit total darkness.

In my opinion, this isn't schizophrenia or anything like that.

I'm no psychiatrist, by the way. But I think I'm hitting the nail on the head here.

To start with, maybe try helping yourself with some herbal stuff (like Valerian root, maybe 2-3 pills a day), or maybe some ginseng or ginkgo... and just try to understand the mechanics of how you broke yourself down.
The feelings you're having are just the chemical backdrop, the stage upon which your conscious thoughts play out. Your subconscious is trying to run the show, telling you whatever it wants. But the subconscious can be sick; it can want things that are bad for you in the long run. Your conscious mind has to recognize that. It's all just pure chemistry. Just realize that. Realize it even when you feel love. Understand that love is also just chemistry. Don't idealize it into something divine, because it's just a "feeling." A feeling is chemistry. It's nothing special, nothing sacred.

It sounds a little bit like one of those self-help books, I guess, but I haven't really seen anyone actually try to tackle their problems this way before. For my own analytical brain... well, everything feels a bit more muted once I realize that all these feelings are basically just chemistry. Just chemicals, maybe, accidentally spilled across the brain because of some subconscious glitch or something.

Harold Anderson3 said:I'm not entirely sure how your uncle qualified for his benefits, but my mom lives with schizophrenia, and after fifteen years in the workforce, her Social Security checks come out to roughly $500.

Hey, I just checked with my mom, and it turns out $867 he’s actually receiving is Grandpa’s pension. Grandpa isn't around anymore, but apparently, his nephew is eligible because of his medical condition.

Can someone please just break down what schizophrenia actually is for me? Like, is it really just hearing voices in your head and seeing things that aren't there? Every single time I try to look this stuff up online, I get hit with a different explanation, and honestly, it’s just super confusing...

Christian Walker3 said:Can someone please just break down what schizophrenia actually is for me? Like, is it really just hearing voices in your head and seeing things that aren't there? Every single time I try to look this stuff up online, I get hit with a different explanation, and honestly, it’s just super confusing...

That’s mainly because the spectrum of symptoms is incredibly broad and varied 🙂

What you're describing—those visual and auditory hallucinations—falls under what clinicians call "positive symptoms."

Look, rather than just guessing, I'll pull some actual info for you:

Schizophrenia symptoms are generally categorized into two groups: positive and negative.
Positive symptoms include delusions, thought disturbances, hallucinations, and unusual behaviors. Delusions are false beliefs or convictions held despite evidence to the contrary—basically, they aren't rooted in reality and can't be corrected by logic. For instance, a person might believe a neighbor is stalking them to exert control over their life. A patient might also experience various thought disorders: sometimes their thoughts jump rapidly from one idea to another without any logical connection, or they might experience "thought blocking"; some patients may invent nonsensical words or substitute words in speech with similar-sounding ones or rhymes. They might also hear voices (auditory hallucinations) that comment on their actions, mock them, or give them commands (command hallucinations).
Negative symptoms involve a loss of emotional expression and responsiveness, a lack of energy, willpower, or initiative, an inability to feel pleasure or interest in previously enjoyed activities, and difficulty concentrating.
A person living with schizophrenia may become emotionally withdrawn from those around them, struggle to recognize the feelings of others, find it difficult to express their own emotions, avoid eye contact, or maintain a flat, indifferent facial expression.

- Source

Hi there,

I know this is a bit of a curveball for this thread, but I have a question. Does anyone know if there are any specific support groups or nonprofits in the US dedicated solely to people living with schizophrenia?
I’ve stumbled upon a few general mental health organizations—like NAMI, for example—but I’m looking for something more niche, specifically for those dealing with schizophrenia. Also, if you had to recommend a top-tier specialist in the States who really knows their stuff and stays closely connected to the patient community, who would it be?

The reason I'm asking is that I recently started training as a psychologist at a residential facility for adults with mental health challenges, where most of the residents deal with psychotic disorders. I’m really hoping to conduct some research involving people with schizophrenia, and my proposal requires including individuals who aren't currently in an institutional setting.

I wasn't sure if this was the right place to ask, or how much the community is actually open to participating in research on top of everything else they're dealing with, but if you have any leads, please let me know. 🙂

Feel free to shoot me a DM too. 🙂

Thanks a million.

He’s been MIA for three days now 🙄🙄🙄, so I finally went ahead and printed out the summons—though why I didn't do that sooner is anyone's guess—and apparently, he’s been cheating on me for three years straight (which he finally admitted)
🙂I'm just trying to hold it together
while dealing with a guy who acts like some two-bit abusive thug
Honestly, I’m genuinely curious what the people reading this think—you know, the ones who are out there doing the exact same thing, whether it's being unfaithful or just being an absolute jerk... or maybe both 🙂🙂☕

How long does someone usually have to deal with an acute psychotic disorder featuring schizophrenic symptoms before it officially gets diagnosed as schizophrenia?
I’ve had this nagging thought pop into my head a few times now—this fear that people are going to tell me I have schizophrenia.
Just recently, I went through another psychotic episode, dealing with both positive and some negative symptoms.

Honestly, I’m genuinely terrified of being labeled with schizophrenia. I can't help but worry about how that stigma might ripple through my entire life. I'm turning 19 soon, and I’ve spent so much time building up these big dreams that I want to chase at any cost. If they slap that label on me, I feel like everything I've worked for will just vanish, and I'll be forced to pivot to a completely different path in life.

Life really can suck sometimes.

Eric Mitchell55 said:How long does someone usually have to deal with an acute psychotic disorder featuring schizophrenic symptoms before it officially gets diagnosed as schizophrenia?
I’ve had this nagging thought pop into my head a few times now—this fear that people are going to tell me I have schizophrenia.
Just recently, I went through another psychotic episode, dealing with both positive and some negative symptoms.

Honestly, I’m genuinely terrified of being labeled with schizophrenia. I can't help but worry about how that stigma might ripple through my entire life. I'm turning 19 soon, and I’ve spent so much time building up these big dreams that I want to chase at any cost. If they slap that label on me, I feel like everything I've worked for will just vanish, and I'll be forced to pivot to a completely different path in life.

Life really can suck sometimes.

An acute psychotic disorder doesn't automatically morph into schizophrenia. For them to slap that "label" on you, as you put it, the symptoms usually have to persist for a much longer period and present a pretty grim clinical picture.
Try not to view it as this massive stigma, because it really isn't. With the right treatment plan, you can function perfectly fine in your day-to-day life and actually reach those goals you're talking about. Of course, beyond just medication, having solid support from the people around you is absolutely vital—which, I truly hope, you have.
You have your goals; cling to them. They'll be what pulls you through, but you have to maintain realistic expectations—take it one step at a time, nothing too grandiose all at once.

hollowbison15 said:An acute psychotic disorder doesn't automatically morph into schizophrenia. For them to slap that "label" on you, as you put it, the symptoms usually have to persist for a much longer period and present a pretty grim clinical picture.
Try not to view it as this massive stigma, because it really isn't. With the right treatment plan, you can function perfectly fine in your day-to-day life and actually reach those goals you're talking about. Of course, beyond just medication, having solid support from the people around you is absolutely vital—which, I truly hope, you have.
You have your goals; cling to them. They'll be what pulls you through, but you have to maintain realistic expectations—take it one step at a time, nothing too grandiose all at once.

Thanks for the encouragement, 🙂
I've been living with this diagnosis for a little over four years now, if I'm remembering correctly.
Honestly, I'd give anything if it were just a brief, acute episode, but hey, I'm trying my best to stay positive. Whatever happens, happens. I guess you just have to make peace with it and learn how to move forward.
As for support, I have people around me more or less, so hopefully, things will turn out okay.