Parenting in the new millennium?

Raising a tiny human is a massive undertaking—honestly, only parents and dog owners truly grasp the sheer exhaustion of it! For everyone else, the struggle is just a passing phase, but for those in the thick of it, the grind lasts years. Sometimes the results feel pretty devastating for both sides. You know, it’s funny—well-behaved dogs are actually way more noticeable than well-behaved people. Four-legged friends don't leave much of a mess behind, whereas the mental clutter among two-legged folks seems to have become a total pandemic lately.

I live near this little neighborhood park where kids are always running around. Lately, I’ve been watching little Dad and little Martin; they are both such bright, energetic five-year-olds.
Dad is already in preschool and he’s got one big wish: a doll. He even asked if his mom could paint his nails! His first wish was granted, but the second? A hard NO. His parents are intellectuals, you see, and they really don't believe in depriving their kid if his requests fall within the realm of normal. They figure he's just navigating that stage of exploring gender roles and identity, so why not let him play with a doll? Just... maybe skip the nail polish. Besides, even Freud argued that you have to work through all those developmental stages—oral, anal, who knows what else—because if you don't, you might end up stuck in a mental rut later, dealing with some specific neurosis.

Then there's Martin. She has this bright yellow dump truck she uses to haul everything around—dolls, tiny cars, you name it. But she also carries this silver plastic magnum. She tucks it right into the pocket of her overalls, letting it swing around so it's always handy whenever she needs it.

The world is full of people like Dad and Martin. They might be outliers, but they aren't the rule. Girls still dress dolls, and boys still drive cars. Both of them are perfectly normal kids.

We're in a new millennium with new people and new ways of raising them. Pedagogy is shifting, and the whole world is changing along with it. Regardless of whatever lifestyle or habits these kids pick up along the way,
they’re eventually going to have to dive headfirst into the deep end of reality. In just a year or two, they'll be glued to smartphones, and with a single click, the entire world will be laid out before them. This generation is going to face a clash unlike any before—balancing their own spiritual development against a relentless technological imperative, all while navigating the moral dilemmas and ethical principles of our society. To actually function, they'll need to build a strong social sense of self without losing the ability to find depth in the non-material side of life.

With globalization being what it is, I really wonder: what kind of resources will they use to learn and grow in harmony with all this change?
These are the new kids. I don't mean those "indigo child" types, but rather the ones who are going to reshape our world just like my generation rewrote the rules—only they'll do it much faster.

So, how on earth do we raise these new generations? Every generation is tasked with keeping up with a changing world, but today, the shift is so rapid that the parenting methods used yesterday are already obsolete by tomorrow. 😛

I'll ask the moderator please not to move this to the Parenting section; we can definitely chat about this right here
if anyone is interested in diving in. 👍

Can you actually explain to me why everything has shifted so drastically?
I mean, shouldn't we be teaching kids about discipline and self-restraint?
Isn't it fundamentally a parent's job to instill a sense of self-respect in their child?
And shouldn't they be getting just as much love and attention as any generation before them?

Look, I’m sorry if this sounds blunt, but it feels like people are making a massive mountain out of a molehill regarding this whole issue.
I see it all the time—parents dodging their responsibilities because their own personal comfort matters more to them than their own kids.
Since when did raising a child suddenly become this impossible feat?
😲

hollowtrucker77 said:Can you explain why everything shifted so drastically?
Aren't kids taught self-discipline and restraint these days?
Isn't it a parent's fundamental job to teach their child self-respect??
Don't kids need just as much love and care now as they did generations ago??

Look, I’m sorry, but it feels like people are making a huge mountain out of a molehill on this one.
I see it all the time—parents dodging their responsibilities because their own comfort matters more than their kids.
Since when did raising a child suddenly become this impossible task?
😲

Listen, once you have an heir of your own and start the whole upbringing process, you realize what a wild ride it actually is. Just when you think you've finally got the compass pointed in the right direction, you realize everything is relative—kind of like life itself.🙄

As a mother of three little monsters, there isn't a single day that goes by where I don't find myself asking the same old questions. And so far, I haven't found any clear guidelines, let alone actual answers.

Perhaps people here aren't fully grasping it yet, but we are living through an era of massive shifts—technological leaps, changing institutions, evolving values. It’s a period defined by uncertainty. Honestly, that isn't inherently good or bad; it just is.

"...Freedom has been thrust back into our hands, and we are all condemned to be free—free to choose. There is no escaping it. Our institutions won't step up to take responsibility because they are too caught up in their own confusion. There is no church, no government, and no market you can lean on anymore. There are no pre-packaged values left to use as an escape hatch... And so, at the dawn of this new millen
ium, we find ourselves faced with the choice to finally take ownership of our own freedom."

But with that freedom comes responsibility... the more choices we have, the more weight falls on us as individuals.

We can either embrace these changes or try to run from them. The bad news is, in a globally connected world like ours, there's nowhere left to hide!

So, how do we prepare these little ones to handle all of this?

Well, isn't that just lovely... why not go all out and infuse them with everything that makes you, you?

All those little fears, frustrations, complexes, projections, and unfulfilled ambitions—not to mention the local culture and traditions. And don't forget the most vital part: ensuring they grow up believing every single thing their ancestors did...

That should turn them into perfect little warriors, I suppose—ready to square off against every single danger this nasty world has to throw at them!

Are you sure you haven't had one too many drinks? 😢

Do you honestly believe that having freedom of choice leads to

anxiety, frustration, complexes, projections, or unfulfilled ambitions ...

that serve as the root cause of all the world's problems? 😕

Or perhaps you're just projecting your own feelings onto me? 😉

Is this how you’re raising—or planning to raise—your children, leading you to recommend such a "successful" model? 😁

Or did we simply completely misunderstand one another? 🙄

rowdydriver52 said:Oh, how lovely... just mold them into perfect little reflections of yourself.

Dump all your fears, your frustrations, your complexes, your projections, those unfulfilled ambitions, your culture, your traditions—and don't you dare forget the most vital part: raising them to believe blindly in everything their ancestors believed.

That’s how you build true little warriors, ready to go head-to-head with every single danger in this wicked world!

Yes, Portisiti, I hear you, but kids aren't plastic action figures or blueprints. They are living, breathing beings with real emotions who GROW, change, and evolve.
What’s relevant today becomes yesterday's news so fast; the shifts are
way too rapid, the demands are massive, and time is always running out.

Raising these little "warriors" puts an incredible burden on parents, basically demanding they overcome a mountain of their own personal frustrations and baggage during the process...
And honestly, that’s the most tragic part for any parent; having to look in the mirror, face your own mistakes, and try to pass down some universal values
without consciously passing those flaws onto the child.

But actually changing *yourself*??????????

Now, that is a whole different story.

I don't have kids, nor do I want them for at least the next decade.
I’m hoping that by then, I will completely outgrow this urge to raise others—because honestly, for the sake of everyone involved, the best thing you can do is NOT raise them... unless they explicitly demand it from us.😛

As for that "ancestral faith" rowdydriver52 was bringing up, I might consider imposing it on my future children just as a bit of a wicked trick: to make them suffer enough that they eventually seek out their own autonomous spirituality, carving a path through bloody thorns that feels far sweeter than living in shackles.😁 😁 😁

When I see what desperate mothers and fathers do to their offspringwith the best of intentions—forcing things upon them just because they can—it really isn't a mystery to me why the world is so incredibly fucked up.

It's that same cycle of behavior inherited from our parents' homes that gets forced onto others in our interpersonal relationships🙄... whether it's being lectured about "the right way" to live, or being completely neglected and ignored....

And more often than not, we end up making those exact same stupid mistakes againwhen it comes to raising ourselves.

************

I am fully aware that after making these statements, some parent is going to jump down my throat with the usual "Oh, you wouldn't know, since you don't have kids..." routine... following whatever clichés their brain dictates.

I'd suggest they save their ink if they only plan on typing just to spite my opinions.
My response to that is simple: 2up:

hmmm, ladies, mothers... do you honestly believe
that those ancient, battle-hardened beings you see staring back at you from those "tiny" little human shapes are actually fragile and helpless? 😁 😁 😁
those magnificent, imposing creatures that you try so desperately to shrink down—to force them into "smallness"—just so you can feel less inferior compared to the sheer spiritual inadequacy your own parents passed down to you?

what exactly is the delusion here? do you really think you’re the ones who need to explain reality to them? you, who don't even grasp the significance of the fingers you keep crossed behind your backs while you forcefully shove your own illusions of existence, your supposed "virtues," and your narrow views of good and evil onto them?

instead of actually learning from them—since, I guess, every generation that follows is technically on a higher evolutionary rung of spiritual development than the one before it—you just obsess over how to mold them, constrain them, and stunt them, all so they can become... YOU?
just some "perfected" projection of your own ego?

well, let's at least be honest with ourselves for once.
focus on your own inner child...
you are primarily responsible for that part of yourself and its growth,
whereas this little energetic PARASITE you look at and fill with "love" and "care"—the one that manipulates you so effectively because it understands you better than you understand yourself—just let it go.
let it develop in whatever direction it was meant to go.
all it really needs is a bit of wind in its sails—meaning, the quality energy from your own field and the collective field of your parents...
because if you've already taken on the responsibility of bringing a human life cycle into being under your roof, then that's really all there is to your purpose.

work on the purity and the quality of that energy field...
and the true, actual Parents will naturally ensure their child receives the best that Life has to offer.

but first, maybe try shattering your own illusions.
it might make things easier for both you and "your" child.

p.s.

this is a thread about spirituality, isn't it? not a column of letters to the editor in a local newspaper?
or am I mistaken?
🙄

Exactly!

rowdydriver52 said:[
This thread is about spirituality, isn't it? Not just some letters to the editor in a local newspaper or a gossip column, right?
Or am I totally off base here?
🙄 [/B]

Look, this is a thread about spirituality, and the way I see it, that touches every single fiber of our existence! You can't even trust basic household upbringing, so please forgive me if I offend anyone by opening up such trivial, mundane topics. Life is so much richer than just studying tiny little PARASITES.

What does our own parenting actually mean???

Absolutely nothing. They’re just our Lego bricks—little toys we stack according to our frustrated whims, driven by hormonal cycles, following whatever bossy mood strikes us, which is really just a generational trend born somewhere back in time when mothers were busy playing with their little parasites in the basement.

On top of that, we let these tiny little little devils manipulate us! Because as unspiritual people, we allow ourselves to have children, forget all about spiritual growth, and drown in these low-level, earthly illusions. Honestly, we don't even deserve pity. Besides, we don't even grasp the concept of energy theft—you know, those "energy vampires."

And those little worms are simply destined to be worms until they encounter a "True Parent." Until they meet them, perhaps many years down the line, they’ll just stumble into conscious learning on their own—mothers are merely providers, the ones feeding the nest, but they don't provide the wind in the sails; that’s what "Parents" with a capital P do. They step in to fix the situation.

Any kind of upbringing is better than none at all—even if it comes from spiritually neglected moms or dads—than being raised by the streets, society, subcultures, the internet, the media, or whatever else! And "True Parents" don't have to show up for every single little worm—they won't—and time flies, the parasites grow, and they turn into massive PARASITES because they lack the guidance, and then they go on to raise their own parasites, and so on...

Forget it.

Don't make kids, Portisiti, because there isn't some perfect pedagogy out there that will satisfy you and turn your children into actual human beings; you'll eventually have to pray to the gods for help anyway.👍

😁 😁 😁 😁 😁

"Don't go having kids, Portisiti, because there isn't some perfect parenting manual out there that'll make you happy while turning your children into decent human beings—you'll end up having to beg the gods for help anyway..."

As if I'm just manufacturing them on an assembly line? Like the Holy Spirit is going to descend on me while I'm out in the field?
And what kind of "parenting philosophy" am I supposed to follow to find happiness? Yours? Or maybe something from Ante Bakovica? 😁
Do you honestly think life is just about procreating and then dumping the entire burden of raising those kids onto society?
I mean, let's be real—99.99% of kids are basically accidents...
You have people who are completely immature—intellectually and emotionally speaking—deciding to bring children into this world...
There used to be a time when a single, mature morphogenetic field shared by parents and the community would take responsibility, providing a healthy foundation for these new little lives... Even "primitive" Aboriginal tribes seem to maintain a healthier collective energy than our entire modern, academic Western society's approach to pedagogy... and yeah, they actually pray to the universe and the gods to prepare them to honorably welcome a new—or rather, ancient—life into their fold... they dedicate their very essence to the space the child will eventually occupy...

Besides, why even start a thread if you aren't interested in an actual dialogue?
Maybe you should just start a blog where you can write your own columns; perhaps someone will notice and feature you alongside Magda Weltrusky in the New York Times or the Wall Street Journal, and the rest of us won't get in your way...

😎

The "pedagogy" I'm referring to is actually quite straightforward:

We need to understand ourselves first, if we ever hope to truly understand our children.

~fin
🙂

Porto said:[:

The "pedagogy" I’m talking about is actually quite straightforward:

We need to understand ourselves first, so we can truly understand our kids.

~fin
🙂 [/B]

That’s just how Porto rolls; basically, "get to know yourself so you realize you shouldn't have kids in the first place." Honestly, suggesting otherwise would be totally irresponsible!

👍

So, that’s your big realization? Why didn't you just say so from the start?

But look,
Nemruth, let me be clear—I am not your son. Remember that.
You can take that attitude elsewhere.
It’s probably too late for me anyway... right?
🙂
Why are you even bothering with rowdydriver52?
Just stick to the topic at hand...
Unless they're actually coming between you and your husband,
then maybe your kids aren't getting that foundation—
that primary environment they need to grow into functional adults—
but honestly, what does that have to do with me?

Where did this sudden attack on me come from?
I guess rog baba is right... the second someone hits a nerve or triggers a stereotype—like that "perfect mother" persona who fusses over her little geniuses (while secretly blaming the whole world for her own inability to handle those close to her)—they immediately start hissing like a snake on a hot stovetop...

Don't project your husband onto me, because I am not him.
And please, don't project your personal issues onto society as a whole... or onto the supposed lack of perfect parenting for your wunderkind, okay?
Why open up discussions you clearly aren't prepared to handle?

And by the way.

I have no issue with children; in fact, I let the child in me learn from their wisdom. When the soul that chooses my wife and me as its closest circle descends into this realm—because souls choose, not us, where they continue their journey—it will be received in exactly the way it needs to be for its development at that specific moment, whether that's "optimal" or not...

In other words, I am the kind of man any woman would want as a father, a mother, a friend, or an elder—for herself and for her children.
😁 😁 😁 😁 😁

Nemrut Dag said:Only parents and dog owners actually get how hard it is to raise a young creature.

That sentence is honestly pretty offensive.

You raise kids—you train dogs. 🙄

To me, every newborn baby is essentially a tiny, profound little guru. 🙂

I truly believe we have far more to learn from children than they could ever hope to glean from us. Unfortunately, though, the reality is that children end up mimicking our own flaws and behaviors most of the time... which is precisely why we find ourselves stuck in the mess we're currently in. 😢

Velma said:That sentence is just plain scandalous to me.

Kids get raised, while dogs get trained. 🙄

I mean, kids are raised, seals perform in circuses, elephants are trained, and dogs are schooled...
as outrageous as that might sound!

In the world of working dog breeding, there’s actually a huge distinction between mere training and true schooling.😁

Los Angeles said:Wow. So that's your big epiphany? Why didn't you just say so earlier?

But listen,
Nemesis, I am not your son, keep that in mind.
You can take that energy elsewhere.
It's a bit late for me... isn't it?
🙂
Why are you even bothering with Los Angeles?
Stick to the actual topic...
Unless he's standing between you and your husband,
then your kids are missing out on that foundation,
that primary environment they need to grow into healthy people,
so what does that have to do with me?

Where did this sudden attack on me come from?
Well, Baba Yaga says it best... the second someone gets triggered by a stereotype or some "perfect mommy" mask worn by someone who fakes caring for their little ones (while actually blaming the whole world for their own inability to handle their family), they start striking out like a rattlesnake in the grass, just like Jean-Jacques Rousseau might describe.

Don't project your husband onto me, because I am not him.
And please, don't project your personal issues onto society at large... or onto the supposed lack of perfect parenting for your wunderkind, okay?
Why open up topics you aren't ready to handle?

And btw.

I have zero issues with kids. In fact, I let the child inside me learn from their wisdom. When that soul chooses my wife and me as its closest circle—because souls choose where they go, not us—it will be accepted in exactly the way it needs to be for its optimal development at that moment.

In other words, I am the kind of man any woman would want as a father, a mother, a friend, or a leader for herself and her children...
😁 😁 😁 😁 😁

"Where I could not, You shall be able to
where I stopped, You shall proceed"

That's what the Old Dragon says. And I say it to you. Because how else can I deal with you than to humbly lower my gaze and stay quiet while you march through my posts.

Still...
when a grown man consciously wants to preserve his childhood joys within himself, even as a mature adult, we can call that a basic human need to hold onto our most precious experiences.
From time to time, that can serve as a sanctuary for a weary
spirit, but it isn't a way to overcome real problems.
When someone finds their sanctuary and their way to fight life's hardships through infantilism—thinking that personal naivety, irresponsibility, or immaturity will act as a sufficient shield—and when that fails, they just inflate their ego.
That's why the Ego expands to the size of a
massive football stadium, until they can loudly proclaim, "I am the man every woman would want as a father, a mother..." and so on.

Maybe. 🙏
Too bad your genetic material isn't for sale; honestly, the world would be
much happier if the little humans inherited your divine qualities.

The age of Pharaohs is over. The royal lilies have long since withered, princes have abdicated, great dictators have vanished, and there aren't even grand debates on religion or spirituality anymore. All that's left are ordinary, trivial problems, just like the issue of parenting itself. 👎 😁

wearyowl29 said:It reminds me of how we raise children—it’s all about guidance and structure. It’s like watching a circus where they train the elephants and coach the performers, yet somehow, we still spend so much more effort training our dogs.

It’s true—even the kids are being taught this, which is honestly quite disheartening.😢
That really is one of the most pressing issues we face today.
It’s honestly pretty questionable how much they actually influence development. You really have to make a distinction there. I think it’s important to just be present in the moment. I remember sitting on a bench in Central Park last autumn, watching the leaves fall, and realized how much we miss when we're constantly rushing toward the next thing. i I believe we should proceed..
I can't help but wonder if Jean-Jacques Rousseau was actually onto something with his theories on negative education. I remember reading about this back in my college lit seminar, and it really makes you rethink how we approach raising kids today.😕

Just a little side note here: I truly believe seals and elephants possess much higher intelligence than dogs.😉

wearyowl29 said:That’s why his ego expands to the size of
a massive football stadium—he feels entitled to announce things like, "I am the man every woman would want as a father, a mother... you get the idea."

And what was I supposed to say? That all those sightings and the chaotic crowds in the UFO corridors over the last few years were solely due to my flawless genetic makeup? I mean, I still have at least a tiny grain of modesty left in me.
Besides, how was I meant to explain this to my wife? Tell her that aliens are constantly trying to kidnap me? She’d lose her mind. How else am I supposed to justify being gone for months at a time? This way, she just assumes I'm out on a field assignment... it might not be her ideal situation, but she’s happy enough. Even I.L. has openly admitted he spends a lot of time over at Orion, which is probably why wives don't quite wrap their heads around it.

At the end of the day, what woman actually wants to know that her husband is out there sharing his DNA with half the galaxy?