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I’m just some messed up kid who’s spent his whole life making nothing but wrong moves. I hate how people live these days, and frankly, it pisses me off. That’s why I’ve chosen pure destruction. I refuse to let the system swallow me whole. Why? Because it’ll just suck me in, chew me up, and spit me out. For me, drugs are where the meaning is. I’m a victim of addiction, and honestly, I don’t care. It was my choice. Eternity from the mine, and that's my right. You guys probably feel sick seeing me, because I am everything you’re running away from. So go ahead, run. I’m fed up with all of you—fed up with those fake smiles you never take off, fed up with your obsession with always being "on," and sick of how too proud you all are. Your constant sucking up, the designer clothes, the perfect hair... it all irritates me. I’m sick of the tuxedos and that forced sophistication. I might be a wreck, but you’re worse. You look pathetic in your desperate need to be accepted. You'll swallow anything just to climb the social ladder. You're just snakes wrapped in polite manners and hollow morality.
Every time I tried to be a "decent person" by your standards, I failed miserably, and I ended up hating myself for even trying.
I’m exhausted by you people and your endless prejudices and stereotypes. You refuse to see reality. All you care about is yourselves and your polished egos.
And don't get me started on those mindless clones posing in overpriced bistros; they’ll probably just marry for a paycheck. They don't give a damn about love; they just want the cash. Some are so clueless they don't even realize they aren't in love—they're just in love with themselves, clinging to some guy who exists solely to cater to their childish whims.
You dream of trips to Mauritius or Bali. Why? Just to snap a few photos to prove your "status" and show everyone you can live high on the hog.
You’re totally oblivious and pretty damn stupid.
All you do is want. You're constantly terrified of being left behind, feeling that pressure to fit in. Every once in a while, you toss a couple of bucks to some poor soul and think you’ve done a good deed. Poor Jadnicak, he's got nothing to eat.
What do you actually have? Nothing but obligations. You’re shackled, and your souls are miles away from freedom. You lost yourselves a long time ago.
Your lives are just templates. You’re machines. Every morning is a carbon copy. The alarm goes off, you get up, brush your teeth, and shove your feet into expensive—yet somehow still depressing—shoes, tightening a tie that defines your look but actually strangles you.
It reminds me of people going to the gym...
Is that really living? Is there any beauty in that?
Is luxury your only goal? Not eating at a local burger joint, but insisting on some five-star restaurant instead. What will you say when you retire? What will you say on your deathbed?
Whose life have I lived? You will all umrecet happy.

Honor to the exceptions.

I won't be surprised if you kill this thread or ban me.

Take care.

Aren't you doing the exact same thing? It's just more prejudice and stereotypes.
They didn't give you a chance? Well, you didn't give them one either. It's just a cycle.
Man. That's life.
Take a risk. Lead by example. Or just stay quiet.

So I'm against everyone, am I?
Fine. Let them talk. It’s actually quite peaceful this way.

Why do you even care about everyone else? What kind of man do you actually want to be? I guess we'll see if you can manage it.

Henry Garcia10 said:Aren't you doing the exact same thing? It's just more prejudice and stereotypes.
They didn't give you a chance? Well, you didn't give them one either. It's just a cycle.
Man. That's life.
Take a risk. Lead by example. Or just stay quiet.

I'm just giving them a taste of their own medicine.

My family is really the only hurdle here. I love them and accept them for who they are, but I won't let them dictate who I become.

Jerry Martinez5 said:Why do you even care about everyone else? What kind of man do you actually want to be? I guess we'll see if you can manage it.

I'll give it a shot.

To feels a bit like you're just going through the motions of a treadmill...
Is that really living? Is that what beauty looks like?

Look, capitalism is what it is—you either deal with it or you opt out. The people you're talking about aren't villains; they're just stuck in the machine, much like the rest of us. You need cash for your kids, groceries, clothes, grabbing a drink with friends, all that stuff.

Ask yourself how you’d feel if you had mouths to feed besides your own—if you had to buy sneakers for someone else instead of yourself, or if...

It’s easy to play the outsider when nobody expects anything from you and you don't expect anything from anyone else. But the second even the slightest expectation pops up from any direction—even just being noticed because you're acting "different" than the crowd🙂—you're sucked back into the system, and sooner or later, it’ll spit you right back out.

The beauty of life isn't found by picking a fight with existence or fighting against what comes your way. If you spend your life battling reality, you're always going to lose. Life is about acceptance—taking the good, the bad, and everything in between, then making smart choices about what you keep and what you toss. That's the whole trick. Once you realize that, there's no room for resentment toward others, because they aren't responsible for your wins or your losses. You made those calls yourself, so if you mess up... well, that's on you. You'll just be smarter next time.🙄

Tyler Anderson52

You all seem so strong, driven by this relentless willpower. I’m not built like that; I'm soft, a coward who runs from reality instead of facing it head-on.
Do I even deserve to live this way?
Do I have a right to my drugs?
And why is this considered hurting my family?
This is just who I am—I'm a contrarian, refusing to follow the path everyone else takes..

I know how to love, just not in the way people do these days.

I’m not really a fan of this world. The planet itself is beautiful, but society...

Honestly, all I can think about when reading this is how much it reminds me of those old Microsoft Azure outages or some massive AWS server meltdown... you know, just total chaos from top to bottom. Am I even in the right ballpark here? 🙂
Seriously though, killer write-up 🙏

Tyler Anderson52 said:

To feels a bit like you're just going through the motions of a treadmill...
Is that really living? Is that what beauty looks like?

Look, capitalism is what it is—you either deal with it or you opt out. The people you're talking about aren't villains; they're just stuck in the machine, much like the rest of us. You need cash for your kids, groceries, clothes, grabbing a drink with friends, all that stuff.

Ask yourself how you’d feel if you had mouths to feed besides your own—if you had to buy sneakers for someone else instead of yourself, or if...

It’s easy to play the outsider when nobody expects anything from you and you don't expect anything from anyone else. But the second even the slightest expectation pops up from any direction—even just being noticed because you're acting "different" than the crowd🙂—you're sucked back into the system, and sooner or later, it’ll spit you right back out.

The beauty of life isn't found by picking a fight with existence or fighting against what comes your way. If you spend your life battling reality, you're always going to lose. Life is about acceptance—taking the good, the bad, and everything in between, then making smart choices about what you keep and what you toss. That's the whole trick. Once you realize that, there's no room for resentment toward others, because they aren't responsible for your wins or your losses. You made those calls yourself, so if you mess up... well, that's on you. You'll just be smarter next time.🙄

Tyler Anderson52

"Living with actual awareness is exhausting. It’s much easier to just exist in some hallucinogenic haze where the shapes of reality are statistically insignificant."

You’ve mastered the art of finding shortcuts to avoid doing any actual work. You’re also an expert at playing the victim and blaming the world for your own life choices.

You tell yourself you’re miserable because you’re the only one who truly sees things while everyone else stays blind. They aren't blind. They just don't care (even when they act like they do). And honestly? Their silence hits harder than all your screaming combined. Because they actually do something. They mess up. They try. Most of us are going to end up in that same pile of failures eventually. It's just that some of us actually gave it a shot before we failed.

You haven't even stepped onto the field yet. So maybe just stay quiet.

You’re choosing to be unadaptable at any cost. That was your call. You hide behind this whole "I'm just different" persona. But with every word you say and every breath you take, you’re just drifting further away from that reality.

My dear Sherlock Holmes, you aren't fighting society. You're just spinning your wheels against yourself.

I don't really know what to make of this one. It’s just... up99. Not much else to say, I guess. Just sitting here thinking about it. Maybe I'm overthinking it too. Probably. kaže:
I'm just giving them a taste of their own medicine.

The only real hurdle is my family. I love them, and I accept them exactly as they are, but I’m just not going to let them turn me into whatever version of myself they have planned out.

You don't even have a handle on your own language, so how could you possibly understand theirs?

They say they just want you to be happy. But while you’re busy trying to make sense of everything, this paranoia starts creeping in—this feeling that they aren't actually looking out for you, but are instead trying to rewire who you are from the ground up. They don't want to fix you. They just want to wipe away that hollow look in your eyes and mask the despair. It isn't about helping; it's about erasing.

@ Noah Sanchez7
Just move to Africa or some remote part of South America—anywhere where the heavy hand of capitalism hasn't reached yet. You won't deal with any of this crap you listed 👍
If that doesn't work, try India. It's a paradise for people like you—drugs, drugs, drugs, and constant partying 😁 In other words, you'll be completely useless there, but nobody will complain about it, and you won't have to worry about the nonsense you brought up in your post 👍

Or just go visit a rehab clinic, see a psychiatrist, or find some purpose in life by making flower crowns or something. That's clearly what you're missing

It’s easy to sit around complaining about how the world works today, or how everyone is corrupt, hypocritical, or shameless. It’s always easier to hate than to love, but does that justify drug use or suicide?? NO, NO, and NO
For certain things, you actually have to fight and not give up, whether through hard work or joining an organization or a movement... the point is to FIGHT and not quit, because quitting is the easy way out. IT MATTERS TO ACT, NOT JUST SIT AROUND CRYING!!!

Look, it seems like you view the world in black and white, and it isn't

Self-destruction isn't going to achieve anything. In fact, by being self-destructive, you become exactly like the people you criticize. You become a big NOTHING

But hey, everyone chooses how they want to live. If you want to destroy yourself, go ahead. It's your choice. At the end of the day, nobody is going to care except those closest to you

You talk like you're the center of the universe, like you own the truth, the answers to everything, and the solution to every single problem...🙄

I'm done...

Mindset!
THINK DIFFERENT!
FUCK THE SYSTEM!

Try to understand things instead of looking at problems, people, or yourself in such a BLACK-AND-WHITE way

That's all from me
peace 👋

Henry Garcia10 said:You’ve mastered the art of finding shortcuts to avoid doing any actual work. You’re also an expert at playing the victim and blaming the world for your own life choices.

You tell yourself you’re miserable because you’re the only one who truly sees things while everyone else stays blind. They aren't blind. They just don't care (even when they act like they do). And honestly? Their silence hits harder than all your screaming combined. Because they actually do something. They mess up. They try. Most of us are going to end up in that same pile of failures eventually. It's just that some of us actually gave it a shot before we failed.

You haven't even stepped onto the field yet. So maybe just stay quiet.

You’re choosing to be unadaptable at any cost. That was your call. You hide behind this whole "I'm just different" persona. But with every word you say and every breath you take, you’re just drifting further away from that reality.

My dear Sherlock Holmes, you aren't fighting society. You're just spinning your wheels against yourself.

You can talk all the trash you want. Sure, I HATE IT! I hate myself because I hate others, but I can't help it since they hate too—they just wear masks to pretend they care.
That cashier at Memphis who gives me that fake smile is better than me just because she's trying? Trying what? Trying to be herself?
That's what I'm trying to do.
Her "silence" really is louder than my shouting.

Also, saying I haven't tried isn't true. So stop talking nonsense.

"Trying to be different." Maybe you're right, but I just want to be myself and nothing else. It's possible I'm getting further away from that.

Henry Garcia10 said:

I don't really know what to make of this one. It’s just... up99. Not much else to say, I guess. Just sitting here thinking about it. Maybe I'm overthinking it too. Probably. kaže:
I'm just giving them a taste of their own medicine.

The only real hurdle is my family. I love them, and I accept them exactly as they are, but I’m just not going to let them turn me into whatever version of myself they have planned out.

You don't even have a handle on your own language, so how could you possibly understand theirs?

They say they just want you to be happy. But while you’re busy trying to make sense of everything, this paranoia starts creeping in—this feeling that they aren't actually looking out for you, but are instead trying to rewire who you are from the ground up. They don't want to fix you. They just want to wipe away that hollow look in your eyes and mask the despair. It isn't about helping; it's about erasing.

I'm not exactly young anymore.

I'll finally be happy when they stop trying to "fix" me.

Noah Sanchez7 said:I'm not exactly young anymore.

I'll finally be happy when they stop trying to "fix" me.

I know you aren't some youngster, which is honestly why this is so sad.

They'll stop eventually. And you'll just get that confirmation that "nobody ever really loved you."

You're like a bottomless pit.

The only silver lining here is that you still have enough anger left to feel something. As long as there's hate, there's life. It’s when you hit total indifference that it’s truly over.

Until then, there's still a little hope left crawling around.😁

"Healthy living," you say... as if you’re the only one who sees through the hypocrisy of the global establishment. Maybe that cashier was smiling at you because she had to. She’s terrified of getting fired. She’s working for peanuts and playing the part just to survive. If she showed any of the resentment simmering inside her, she'd be out on the street. You want to talk about joining causes and volunteering? Trust me, there are plenty of people more hypocritical than you. By the way—whose bread are you really eating?🙂

You guys are all strong—you've got the drive and the will. Me? Not so much. I’m weak, soft... just someone who runs from problems instead of facing them head-on.

I think you're seriously deluding yourself, and if you want proof, just look at the skyrocketing numbers of people struggling with mental and physical health issues. The idea that we're "healthier" just because modern medicine has bumped up our life expectancy is total nonsense. Everyone is struggling, everyone is overwhelmed, and everyone is hurting. You aren't some special case here. The only real difference between you and everyone else is that you refuse to take responsibility, while the rest of us are doing exactly that. There's nothing wrong with that, except for one thing—don't go judging them. Most people can't help it, they don't know how, or they simply won't do it any other way. If you drop that judgment, you'll find your anger fades, and you'll actually end up happier... which makes life a lot easier for the people around you, too.

Tyler Anderson52

Noah Sanchez7 said:You all seem so strong, driven by this relentless willpower. I’m not built like that; I'm soft, a coward who runs from reality instead of facing it head-on.
Do I even deserve to live this way?
Do I have a right to my drugs?
And why is this considered hurting my family?
This is just who I am—I'm a contrarian, refusing to follow the path everyone else takes..

The addiction has already hijacked your brain, so now it’s just hunting for a thousand excuses to relapse. When you're spiraling and desperate for a fix, take a second to look in the mirror. You're probably like someone at a McDonald's craving a burger—you'd give up everything just for one bite. It’s like how people eat bread baked by hardworking bakers overnight, yet they look down on those workers because they’re part of "the system," even though they aren't exactly saints themselves when they're out buying stuff on the street.