Support resources for families dealing with cancer and other serious illnesses

mellowhawk84 said:Hey everyone. I guess it’s nice having a corner of the internet where you can actually share something useful, though I'm new here, so sorry if this story has already been told. Basically, my family—me, my brother, my dad, and the whole extended crew—is dealing with a massive crisis because of my mother's mental illness. Every single day is just screaming and chaos. It feels like everything is our fault. We can barely have a normal conversation with her; even when we try, she just finds something to nitpick and immediately starts to increase the tension. God forbid someone makes a joke, she takes it all the wrong way. Her moods swing wildly from crying to yelling constantly throughout the day. Living with her is exhausting. Her behavior is destroying us; we just endure these mental outbursts. It's impossible to get anything done near her, let alone study for an exam, which is tough since my brother is still in college and I've already finished my degree. At night, she doesn't sleep. She wakes up a hundred times, coming into our rooms to check if we're sleeping, so there's zero privacy or peace. This has been going on for seven years. She’s been hospitalized at a psychiatric facility twice, most recently back in 2006. Right now, she doesn't work at all, just
does housework, whereas working seasonal jobs down by the coast used to keep her calm, but she refuses to do that anymore. Her condition is just getting worse. The yelling is constant. It's gotten to the point where our relatives barely visit because she’s picked fights with almost everyone, even her own mother. I can't remember the last time I brought a friend over, or a girlfriend, or even had a chat with a neighbor. When people see or hear her, they just shut themselves away, and honestly, sometimes I'm embarrassed just walking down the street. My dad works out on the coast, so he’s fine while he's away, but when he comes home for the winter, he has to deal with this too. Everyone would be happier if she’d just agree to treatment, but whenever we suggest she go see a
doctor, she tells us we're all the crazy ones, so it just turns into another fight. Maybe someone else here has dealt with this at home and knows how it feels. I've seen plenty of illnesses, but I think this might be the worst one. I'm just terrified that one day, I'll end up being like that. Ugh.

I can only send you love and good vibes, but unfortunately, I can't fix the situation with your mother. Maybe hospitalization really is necessary.
Hang in there 🙂

Well, now we’re facing a whole new set of challenges 😢 Everything seemed to be progressing smoothly without much trouble during this first cycle, but clearly, something had to go sideways on this final day. Our patient isn't doing terribly physically, though he did start feeling that internal agitation and nausea today; he’s still staying hydrated and trying to manage some fruit since he couldn't stomach much after breakfast. However, the real crisis is the sudden psychological collapse we witnessed today. We spent over an hour talking to him about resilience, about other people whose stories ended on a positive note after fighting through this... just covering everything we could think of. But he remains stubbornly stuck in his own head, insisting that everything feels bleak, lamenting how this is all just pure suffering, and even suggesting he'd rather just stop the therapy entirely regardless of the consequences. He claims this entire process is nothing but torture and that there’s absolutely no quality of life left to speak of—just a constant stream of negativity. We are doing everything in our power to lift his spirits here at home, but honestly, his mental state looks grim. How can I possibly bolster his morale right now?
Sending my best to everyone out there fighting these terrible illnesses, whether you are battling it yourself or caring for a loved one :-*

Hey everyone

Does anyone actually know how to deal with a Hiccup after chemo?
Thanks!!

Hey everyone!

I've been lurking on this forum for years, and I have to admit, I’ve scrolled past this page plenty of times looking for health answers that seemed relevant at the moment. You think, yeah, that stuff happens to someone else. You sympathize, but you don't really dive deep into the issue.
Then something suddenly hits you and pulls you into a whirlwind you didn't even know existed. You realize in a brutal way that serious illnesses don't just happen to distant acquaintances—they happen to your own family. It's my dad; he was just diagnosed with Stage III renal cell carcinoma. He had surgery and is back home recovering before starting the next phase of treatment. They found tumor cells in the surrounding nodes, the fat around the kidney, and nearby blood vessels. There isn't solid proof yet that it has spread elsewhere in his body, but there's definitely reason to worry. The doctors are being cautious—actually, I'd say they're being pessimistically cautious.

Sorry for jumping straight in asking for help without reading all the previous posts first, but I feel like every second counts right now. I'm hoping people with some experience can just give me a few pointers on which supplements might help boost his immunity, improve his blood work, and get him ready for the fight ahead.

Right now, he's taking honey with royal jelly, some aloe vera preparation, drinking beet and carrot juice, and eating organic veggies along with plenty of fruit and high-protein food.

What else do you recommend??

They're advertising noni, Japanese mushrooms... Is any of that actually useful, or is it just people making money off of someone else's misery?

Any advice is welcome. I'm going to go catch up on the older threads now. Thanks in advance to everyone, and I hope for a quick recovery.

Raymond Jackson38 said:Hey everyone.

I’ve been on this forum for years, and I have to admit, I’ve skipped over this page plenty of times looking for health answers that mattered to me at the moment. You think, maybe those things only happen to someone else. You sympathize, but you don't really dive into the mess.
Then suddenly, something happens and pulls you into a vortex you didn't even know existed. You realize in a cruel way that serious illnesses don't just happen to distant acquaintances, but to your own family. It's my dad; he was diagnosed with Stage III kidney cancer. He had surgery and is back home to recover before starting the next phase of treatment. They found tumor cells in nearby nodes, the fat tissue around the kidney, and adjacent blood vessels. There isn't solid proof yet that it has spread elsewhere, but there's a valid suspicion. The doctors are cautious—actually, I'd say they're pessimistically cautious.
I apologize for not reading the previous posts before jumping straight in asking for help, but I feel like every second counts. I’m asking anyone with experience to just give me some initial guidance on which supplements might help boost his immunity, improve his blood work, and prepare him for the fight ahead.
Right now, he's taking honey with royal jelly, some Aloe Vera preparation, drinking beet and carrot juice, and eating organic vegetables along with plenty of fruit and heavy nutrition.
What else would you recommend??

They advertise Noni, Japanese mushrooms... Is that actually useful, or are people just profiting from someone else's misery?

Any advice is welcome. I’m going to go study the previous posts now. Thanks in advance to everyone, and I wish for a speedy recovery.

First off—I am so sorry about the diagnosis, but nothing is set in stone yet, and you have to stay positive! Every day we hear on the news about new treatments being found, and in a few years, they'll be treating tumors like a common cold.

For immune support:

Solgar Beta 1,3 Glucan, 3x1 of 200mg (around $72) available at all pharmacies
Heder native propolis 2 x2 before meals (around $50) available at all pharmacies
Magnesium (preferably Magnesium direct Biolectra) because it's a powder and enters the bloodstream immediately. It's not a pill, so it doesn't put extra strain on the liver.

As many vitamins as possible, since it's a powerful antioxidant.

Ask the pharmacist about other preparations—there's something called Cellu Deffens or something like that.

The stuff listed above is what I use. Just yesterday I was reading a study on this native propolis, which has supposedly been proven to inhibit tumor cells (they did testing on mice with tumors and they were cured with native propolis!)—I'll find the study and share the link with you later. It helps the liver break down toxins... I guess.🙏

Good luck!

Kate Reed63 said:Hey everyone

Does anyone happen to know how to deal with a Hiccup after chemo...!?
Thanks!!

I know this might sound ridiculous, but I have my own way of managing a Hiccup normally.
Honestly, I hate hiccuping because it makes my whole body ache immediately, so one doctor taught me a trick to stop it. I'm not sure if it works for everything or what kind of hiccups you get after chemo, but:

When it starts, you should:

1. Stand up
2. Lean forward at a 45-degree angle (if possible)
3. Throw your head back as far as you can
4. Take a glass of water and take 1-2 sips while staying in that position

The Hiccup should stop. It has something to do with the diaphragm, but I can't really explain the mechanics. I suppose it might help someone.
For a mild Hiccup, sometimes just raising your left arm high into the Air for a few seconds is enough. 👍

I probably sound crazy even to myself. 😍

Kate Brooks2 said:Now we have a whole new issue 😢 Everything was going so smoothly without much trouble during this first cycle, but today, right at the end, things had to go south. Our patient isn't physically doing poorly; he’s only just starting to feel that agitation and nausea today. He’s still drinking plenty and trying to eat fruit since he couldn't manage much after breakfast. The biggest problem is his sudden mental crash today. We spent over an hour talking to him about fighting, about other people who came out okay on the other side... just everything. But he keeps repeating the same thing... how everything feels so bleak now... how this is all just suffering... how he’d rather just stop this therapy altogether, no matter what... how he sees this entire thing as pure torture because there's no quality of life left... just endless stories. We're trying, and we will try, to lift his spirits again once we're home, but mentally, he seems really low. How can I boost his morale even a little?
Greetings to everyone fighting these terrible illnesses, whether you are the patient or
have someone who is sick :-*

From what I can gather, is the patient heading home soon? Once they get home, they'll perk up! Hospitals are incredibly gloomy and depressing. If someone sent me back to a hospital right now, I’d just wither away! It matters that he's physically stable for now, and when he gets home, just wrap him in love and try not to give him those sad looks. From my own experience, I know no illness is as terrifying as seeing the fear in the eyes of the people who love you and are afraid of losing you. There's nothing worse in this world. So, just love and positivity! You'll pull through! 🙂

My grandfather just got his latest test results back. The cancer hasn't spread to his lungs yet, which was a small mercy, but things have changed since last month when it was only affecting two lymph nodes in his neck. Now, all seven are involved. The doctor told us that while it likely won't hit the lungs, it's heading toward his brain. Once it reaches the brain, my grandfather will pass away 😢 It’s been so incredibly heavy trying to process all of this... I just can't wrap my head around how cancer can move this aggressively, this quickly. If anyone here understands the mechanics of why it spreads so fast, I would be so grateful if you could explain it to me... Sending love to you all, please stay strong 🙂

My child has epilepsy, and I’m currently stuck with all the test results and EEG scans on USB sticks. I was wondering if anyone could tell me the name of the software used to read EEG findings on a computer...

fadedtrucker5 said:From what I can gather, is the patient heading home soon? Once they get back to their own space, they’ll finally start to feel alive again! Hospitals are incredibly bleak and soul-crushing environments. Honestly, if someone tried to send me back to a hospital right now, I’d just wither away! The most critical thing is that they are physically stable for the moment, but once they are home, you absolutely must surround them with love and try to avoid directing any sad or worried looks their way. Speaking from my own experience, I know firsthand that no illness is quite as devastating as the terrifying sight of seeing fear in the eyes of the people who love you—those who are paralyzed by the dread of losing you. There is nothing more crushing for a person to endure. So, stick to love and positivity! You all are going to pull through this! 🙂

That is exactly what I am hoping for, especially since he already sounds better today, likely because the day he gets to return home is drawing near 🙂🙂
We are going to get him back on his feet; we aren't about to give up on him 🙂
Thank you so much for the response, sweetie, a huge thank you 🙂🙂

Kate Brooks2 said:I’m hoping for the same thing. Things feel a little better today, mostly because the day I get to head home is getting closer.
We'll pull him through. We aren't giving up.
Thanks for the reply, sweetheart. Much appreciated.

Way to go! Just stay positive and take it one day at a time. I'm praying for you guys...

My last radiation session is tomorrow—or maybe today. 🎉 Or so I hope.

In the meantime, I've developed this rash on my chest and torso. It itches like crazy and keeps spreading downward. I've been using aloe vera, which helps a bit, I guess. Apparently, it's a side effect of Temodal. 🤷 A colleague of mine had the exact same thing, so I'm trying not to panic...
My hair is still falling out constantly, just enough to be annoying, and now I'm starting to look dangerously like Mavrović. 🤣 Once everything is gone, maybe I'll just get a breast reduction (might as well have plenty to spare for Rihanna). My sister says I look like Neelix from Star Trek, though I feel more like Seven of Nine. 🙂..

September 1st is the date burned into my mind. That's when I return to work, back among people who know the score—people who don't pressure me, who understand without pitying me. I just need to get back to my routine, my job, my coworkers, even the "stress." 😍 That’s what will actually heal me...

Insomnia is still my best friend. If I'm lucky, I might get 3 or 4 hours of sleep with the help of a pill. Maybe that'll pass once the Temodal is out of my system. 🎉
I'm just waiting to finish up tomorrow. Then I'll find out how long the break is before the next chemo cycle, what my blood counts look like after all this, and when my follow-up is. Then, finally, I'll be a free woman. 🎉

If anyone needs anything, let me know. I'll help if I can. All I can say—whether you're sick or someone you love is—is to always think positively. It's never been the case that it didn't help somehow. You have to realize some things are within your control and others aren't. You can tell people you love them, that you're there for them, that you care.

Love you all, hang in there! 😘 🙂

🙂

Just checking in. I finished my last radiation session today, so no more trips to the hospital starting tomorrow. 🎉 Follow-up is in a month, then a new round of chemo. Until then, I guess I'll just rest, do whatever I feel like, and try to spread some joy and positivity. 🙏

Woohoo! 🙂 Come on, you knocked out one whole part. 😁

It is truly wonderful that you finally have a moment to recharge your own batteries and stop obsessing over therapy for a while. You are such an asset to this group, and I honestly believe we all look forward to reading your posts. In fact, I’ve started reading them aloud to my husband because they have such a powerful, positive effect on us—they truly help pull us up from the ashes.
My father-in-law made it home today, though he is absolutely exhausted, worn down by both the treatment and the sheer grind of being in the hospital. He had some fresh blood work done before discharge, and the results aren't bad at all. Some levels dropped, sure, but everything is staying within the normal range; his platelet count went from 134 down to 99, but we will find a way to get those numbers back up over the next three weeks. His appetite isn't great today, but I haven't been forcing him to eat; he had a decent breakfast, took his medications and supplements, and now he's mostly just sleeping and resting. I told him I wouldn't smother him with food during these first few days—he needs to rest and stay hydrated, and we’ll get his nutrition back on track soon enough. I gave him some pikovit syrup to see if it might jumpstart his appetite a bit. I also prepared plenty of fresh juice made from beets, carrots, lemon, apple, and grapefruit... but we'll try that again tomorrow or in the coming days. Sending love to everyone, hang in there.

melloworca6 said:Finally. I guess. 🙂 I guess you managed to push through one part of it. Maybe. 😁

I did! And I start work on September 1st. 🎉
My next round of chemo starts on September 17th. I'm trying to boost my immune system until then, I guess. I have to go get bloodwork and a urine test done tomorrow morning to see how much my levels have dropped. Maybe. 👍

Kate Brooks2 said:It’s great that you finally have some breathing room to recharge without constantly worrying about treatment. You’re such a light for us here, and I think we all look forward to your updates. I’ve even started reading them to my husband because they’re so uplifting—they really help pull us out of the ashes.
My father-in-law got home today. He's exhausted, honestly... just drained from the therapy and the whole hospital ordeal, I suppose. He had some new blood work done before leaving the facility, and it isn't half bad. A few things dropped, but everything seems to be within the normal range, mostly. His platelets fell from 134 down to 99, but maybe we’ll manage to get those back up over the next 21 days. He doesn't have much of an appetite today, though I haven't pushed him. He had breakfast, took his meds and supplements, and now he's just sipping on some royal jelly juice I made. He's mostly just sleeping and resting. I told him I wouldn't nag him about food during these first few days; he needs to rest and stay hydrated, and we'll get his diet back on track later. I gave him some pikovit syrup, hoping it might help his appetite a bit. I also made a bunch of juice with homegrown beets, carrots, lemon, apple, and grapefruit... but we'll try that tomorrow or in a few days. Kisses to everyone, hang in there.

Everything will turn out fine, I guess. I’m not worrying at all! He's a fighter, and he has a great team behind him. Just stay positive and don't give up! 🙏

fadedtrucker5 said:Everything is going to turn out fine, honestly, I’m not even worried! I truly believe he’s a fighter and he has an incredible team behind him! We just need to stay positive and refuse to give up! 🙏

If he had even a single second of the positive energy you seem to be carrying, we might have a chance. This news has absolutely crushed us.😢
He was weak the entire time, yet he kept trying to eat, pushing himself harder every single day to improve, but tonight he just hit rock bottom.😢
He told us straight out that he’s done; he doesn't want to fight anymore, he doesn't want to eat, and he certainly doesn't want to take any more medication because it all feels utterly futile. He feels like he’s just suffering and causing everyone around him to suffer along with him, and he simply cannot handle it—not mentally and certainly not physically. He feels like the doctors are just feeding him false hope, much like we were, and he can sense deep down that the end is near and that it would be better to just speed things along. We talked to him about everything (we didn't break down), trying to have a rational conversation (though, frankly, I don't know how we managed to keep it together). We threw a thousand reasons at him to keep fighting, but nothing works... there is absolutely no hope left in him. I plan to head back to the doctor's office to sit down with them and figure out what our next steps actually are. I prepared myself for the worst and hoped for the best, but I never expected someone to throw in the towel after the very first round of chemo, especially when he doesn't even look that bad.🤷I've had this heavy, sickening feeling in my gut for days, but this latest development has completely destroyed me. I realize his struggle is infinitely harder than ours, but I simply cannot wrap my head around this decision to quit and this desperate desire to hasten the end.😢(((((((((((

😢

Nobody wants to be a burden, especially not to the people they love most.
I suppose you just have to stay even tougher for his sake. You have to keep insisting that every single day gets better—that this is just a short episode, and soon he'll be back to doing what he loves. Does anyone happen to have any info regarding the possibility of a new surgery? 🙂

EDIT: I had blood work and a urine test done yesterday, so I should get the results today. 🙂 Thank God everything is fine. I feel great, actually, and I've started sleeping better (about 6 hours if I take a pill). My head was aching a bit yesterday, but it's about 100 degrees out there, so I guess I can't really complain. Today I feel wonderful. I'm looking forward to getting back to work; my next chemo starts on September 17th. 👍

I am keeping my fingers crossed that his blood counts improve, and I truly wish him nothing but the absolute best...
We try our hardest to stay strong, but when we finally stumble, we make sure not to let him see it. Today, he’s doing a second better with food... but honestly, that's just for our own sake; mentally, absolutely nothing is changing. The doctors don't have anything more intelligent to offer than the usual "this is normal" or "they often react this way to therapy," or "don't pressure him to eat." All of that is fine, but there was one day where I didn't push at all, and he literally ate nothing—he just sipped some juice and water. We have to keep pushing forward, and who knows what else lies ahead for us. We'll be bringing his wife home from work soon; it's true she has to leave her job because of all of this, but there really is no other way. Greetings to everyone, and please, do not give up, because that is the one thing I simply cannot forgive. 🙂))))))) Love,

Hi there!
So, I'm back...
My one-year-old daughter just fought her way through a kidney tumor...
Now, it looks like leukemia might be next on the list (we're praying it isn't before the start of September)... Hopefully, she can fight through this too.
Basically, it all started with anemia... her ferritin levels are barely producing anything now. Her white blood cell count is up...
About 80% of the symptoms are present...
But we're still holding onto hope...