Posts by gentlepanther10

Douglas Price5 said:first off,
you don't deal with nearly as many breakouts as I do—or most people in this group—so you don't really have the full picture here.
beyond just looking bad, acne carries a much heavier burden: the psychological toll. we're talking about feeling worthless and losing massive amounts of self-confidence. teenagers and young adults are already going through so much mentally, so dealing with skin issues can be devastating. it can lead to some really dark places, even suicide.

At the end of the day, mental health always takes priority over physical appearance.

so if someone is struggling, they should just take those damn pills and get it over with.

Yeah, and on top of that, it’s totally possible for acne to be caused by your mental state in the first place!

I’ve realized that my skin is just super sensitive, and honestly, all that heavy chemical stuff (the same ingredients everyone else keeps mentioning here) actually makes things worse for me. So, I decided to just let nature take its course, and after two months of doing nothing, my skin was totally clear!
All those products just strip your skin dry because they're trying to suck the moisture right out of the pimples!
And the more you dry out that top layer, the more the layer underneath starts pumping out oil to compensate. Your skin is supposed to be oily enough to protect itself from everything—sun, wind, the cold, whatever!
It produces oil specifically to shield itself from those elements.
Then you sweat, the skin pumps out sebum, and you're stuck dealing with all the pollutants in the air, fungi, bacteria, etc., all day long...
The key is cleaning your face naturally at night: just use water and a really mild soap!
That way, you wash away the excess oil and sweat (which is salty and irritating!) along with all the grime you picked up during the day. It keeps your pores clean and empty so your skin can actually "breathe" again.

And if anyone doesn't believe me, try taking a white cotton pad when you get home tonight and wipe your face—you'll see what I mean!

I used to make my three kids wash their faces every single night—because let's face it, teenagers can be pretty lazy and messy—😉
and not one of them ever broke out!

Look, I feel for you guys, I really do. I know exactly how hard it is. Just try this natural approach for maybe four weeks and let me know how it goes. 😉

👋

Honestly, you’re going through the exact same thing I did. Nothing worked—actually, it was worse. Every time I tried some fancy new cream or went to see an aesthetician, my skin just flared up even more instead of getting better.
By the time I hit 27, I basically threw in the towel and decided I wasn't doing anything else!
The only thing I do now is wash my face every morning with a really mild soap and then apply the simplest moisturizer possible. I use Johnson & Johnson. They have Dove now, and that’s the one I use. 👍
It's also super important to wash your face with that same mild soap at night and then just leave it alone—let the skin actually recover and breathe for once.

I eventually realized that anything containing alcohol just trashes my skin; it made the inflammation way worse.

Another big thing: don't squeeze anything! When a whitehead matures and looks ready, it wipes away easily if you just dab it with a tissue or a Kleenex. Then just wash with mild soap, put on a little Dove, and call it a day.
Skin needs hydration, not grease!

I really think things will start looking up for you eventually—that's just how it goes.
Just watch what you eat, too. Try not to go overboard on pork or greasy stuff 👍
especially fast food.

If you want to actually do something good for your skin, grab two slices of fresh cheese this weekend (or whenever you feel like it). Spread it over your face—just stay away from your eyes and mouth—and let it sit until it firms up, maybe about 30 minutes. Then rinse it off with lukewarm water until it's all gone. After that, just apply a bit of Dove again and 👍 (like, you could even do this while you're in the shower)

It acts like a natural peel, and your skin just soaks up whatever nutrients it needs from the cheese. 😉

Melissa Clark46 said:I wash my hands both before and after using the restroom—and even right when I get back home if I’ve only popped over to the convenience store across the street.
I absolutely loathe those public doors you have to grab with your hand; I usually try to use my elbow instead.
Since my job involves handling cash all day, that’s another big reason why I’m constantly washing up.

Hmm, looking back, it feels like I’m doing this more often and much more intensely lately... soak, soap, scrub, rinse, then just do the whole thing all over again. Then I’ll grab a paper towel or a wipe, use that same wipe to open the door, walk outside, and then figure out where to toss it in a trash can.

And yeah, I always toss that first paper towel sticking out of the dispenser immediately because I have no clue who was using it before me—same goes for the toilet paper.

Am I overdoing it?😕

Honestly, I’ve noticed people doing that exact same thing plenty of times.
I was actually reading in the news today that you’re supposed to scrub your hands for at least 10 seconds.
👍

Oh, for sure—I’ve been showering every single day for years now, and during the summer? I’m probably jumping in two or three times a day!
1. I just use a mild liquid soap—basically just whatever fits in my palm—and I focus on lathering up the 😉 essential spots first before spreading the rest over the
rest of my body. 2. The real key, though, is making sure you slather on some lotion right after you get out 😉
. 3. And once a week, I’ll just soak in the tub for like two hours straight 😍
.
So yeah, nothing about it is 👍
weird.

violent_femmes9 said:hmm. I mean, if you’re wiping after you go, wouldn't you be using hands that just touched a nasty subway pole? Even if there's paper in between, it still feels kind of gross, right?

Basically, I think women should wash their hands before they use the restroom too.

🤔 hmm, I hadn't really thought about it that way—yeah, because of the paper...

Madeline Mad said:Good grief, what’s even weird about that? It's basically just basic hygiene—especially when it comes to guys👍

I mean, sure, washing your hands after you use the restroom is a given,
but honestly, I’ve only noticed guys washing up before they eat in the last few years, and I think that's totally fine too.

Karen Hayes50 said:well, it wasn't even that weird before...
like, I could spend all day running errands around Chicago, touching random stuff, and then go home and handle a pretty significant part of a guy's anatomy with those same hands.

I feel like it’s just easier for women... we don't have to deal with the whole "unzip, pull out, and stretch" routine.
so yeah, I've got it covered.😁

yeah, that's definitely part of it 👍

plus, when things get urgent, they usually find it way easier to just grab what they need quickly🙄

Elon Musk said:not even that dirty... just regular, everyday hands... mine, yours, his, everyone's... I don't mean like if someone had been digging in the mud all day and needed a wash--that's just common sense, and there's zero debate about avoiding handshakes with people who are actually filthy..
I’m talking about those normal, everyday moments—like meeting someone for the first time, or seeing an old friend you haven't bumped into in forever, where people's hands are usually more or less just... fine. I mean, let's be real, if you run into someone on the street, their hands aren't exactly freshly scrubbed. Who knows where they've been? They could've been riding the subway, tying their sneakers, handling cash, stuff like that.

And honestly, no, that doesn't bother me at all, I don't really give it a second thought...

Plus, I know this one guy who is super diligent about washing his hands both before and after using the restroom.

Taylor Swift said:Is it just about handling things, or does it include touching other public surfaces too? (Mysophobia)
Are there any other ritualistic behaviors involved besides what you mentioned—like excessive hand washing, showering, or cleaning? (OCD

🤔hm, well, I never actually touch train station doors with my hands—I always use my foot, my elbow, or I'll just wait for someone else to open it for me; growing up, I was basically taught not to touch those station doors because of all the germs and sickness and stuff, since so many different people are grabbing them... so yeah, that's why I wash my hands like crazy when I get home or before I eat. As for other things, I don't really have an issue with bathrooms (I don't sit on the seats) or trash cans or anything like that...
and I've raised my kids the same way. Honestly, I don't think it's being "excessive," just being careful... or am I wrong?

Karen Hayes50 said:This topic really hits two different areas... psychology and health.

I think it's psychological because it feels like some kind of mental glitch, but then there's the health aspect since—well, maybe I'm wrong about that part...

Does anyone else get totally grossed out by shaking hands (like when you're meeting someone new and all) with people who are basically strangers?
Do you find yourself worrying about how clean their hands actually are? Like, wondering where they've been or what they were doing right before they forced you into a handshake?
😕

Honestly, it just depends on why they're dirty!
If it's from work—say, if they're an Automechanic—then that's just life, and you can't really blame them for that.
But if they're just unhygienic, with black fingernails and sticky skin because they haven't washed up in days? Then yeah, absolutely.
If I absolutely have to shake hands with someone like that, I'll be looking for any excuse to go wash my hands immediately. Honestly, though, I usually avoid those types altogether—I don't really run in those circles.

For me, it's way more important that my partner has clean, well-kept hands!

And no matter where I go or what I'm doing, the first thing I do when I walk through my front door is wash my hands.
It's a habit before every meal, too. Even when I'm out at a restaurant—after I order my pizza, I'll head to the restroom to scrub up, and if it looks clean enough, then I'll sit back down to eat.😉

That's just how I was raised, and it stuck with me.

electricpanther82 said:I'm pretty new here, so I'm not sure if this topic has come up before, but what's the absolute worst experience you've had—or seen someone else go through—regarding a serious illness, some crazy procedure, or a hospital surgery? For me, the creepiest thing was hearing my aunt talk about her tonsillectomy. She was 21 at the time, and they didn't even put her under—just local anesthesia. They gave her like four shots in each tonsil, but it barely did anything,😢 ,practically nothing! So basically, the doctor was just cutting out and pulling at her tonsils while she was wide awake... just terrifying.😢 😢 😢

Boxer, and welcome 🙂
So, here's my take—back when my daughter was 17, she had her tonsils out under local too, and she was totally fine to head home after just two days. Everything went smoothly.

But my most intense experience with medical stuff... man...
When I was about 9, I had this toothache—the fourth one from the middle, an upper one right by the canine. It was hurting and a bit swollen. I think it was a Saturday. Around 1 AM, we headed to the emergency clinic, checked in, waited, and finally, after about an hour, it was our turn. The Dentist who examined me smelled like a walking distillery!
The second he looked at where it hurt, he decided that tooth HAD to come out!

Before anyone could even think about using a scalpel, he just grabbed me and yanked the tooth right out!
WITHOUT ANY NUMBING!
I screamed so loud that my grandma, who was waiting outside, came flying into the exam room like a bolt of lightning...
It felt like my entire right side—maybe even my right eye—was being ripped off😕

The next day, we figured out the damage:
1. He actually pulled a perfectly healthy, permanent canine!
2. That rotten baby tooth next to it? It was still aching just fine!

Justin Rodriguez81 said:😂 🤣 🙂 🙂

Man, I actually managed to make someone laugh today, which is a win in my book. 😬

So, just so you get a sense of my ex—this total hot-headed manager type who spent half an hour screaming at me (seriously, just because I crushed my targets while he was out of the office?!)—you wouldn't believe how much he crumbled the second I dropped my resignation on his desk and told him I was heading home...

This guy, who’s basically a 6'1", 360lb wall of ego, suddenly shrunk down into nothing... he was practically sobbing while trying to explain why he acts the way he does...
It was honestly one step away from him dropping to his knees and begging for sympathy...

An hour later, it hit me—the guy is just deeply depressed. He’s ashamed of himself, and that whole aggressive persona is just a mask he wears to survive...

And honestly? He isn't the only one walking around this world hiding behind a mask. 😉

analogwolf4 said:That is just wild... seriously unreal... a divorce judge? haha... you really cracked me up with that one...

Look, if she had just walked away back then—you know, before she even hit 35,
(back when she was first hospitalized, mostly because she just couldn't handle things or find any way to actually live her life), she wouldn't have dealt with depression in the first place!

I mean, if she’d been living her own life without that idiot dragging her down, she wouldn't have had a single reason to spiral into a depressive state.

northernskipper41! 👍

Seriously though, if it wasn't for you, that "friend" of yours probably wouldn't have even kicked off (or nudged her along) the whole medical process.😉

analogwolf4 said:nah, that's not how it works... depression can actually come from a million different things—like, seriously. It could be genetics, an injury, body image stuff, even just crappy nutrition—there’s honestly so much that triggers it. If you really want, I can sit down and write out a whole list of everything that contributes to it and email it over to you... blah blah blah... but at the end of the day, it all boils down to some kind of biochemical imbalance in the brain. And the reasons why those imbalances happen are what we talked about earlier. As for prevention? Well... someone I was arguing with earlier made a decent point—medication, psychotherapy, and then there's... well, I still stand by my own take: if you don't get off your butt and actually try to engage with the world again, nothing else matters. 🙂 there's no magic pill...

Thanks, really, but I appreciate the offer for a deep dive, I don't actually need it.
I’ve basically become my own analyst—mostly because I’m just wired that way, and probably thanks to everything I've dealt with in life too. I always know exactly why I'm feeling down and exactly how to snap myself out of it.🙏

It's true that people around you can provide support, but the reality is that a person struggling with depression has to actually *want* help. That’s essentially what you’re getting at when you say... "get off your butt." 😉

If someone isn't willing, then it doesn't matter if you bring in a psychologist, a psychoanalyst, or a therapist—they won't be able to help.
The only exception is if the person becomes aggressive or a danger to themselves or others; then, medication might be used just to sedate them so they're just sitting there staring at a wall—kind of like my neighbor mentioned—or, well, the law steps in.

In my opinion, my neighbor doesn't need meds, she needs a divorce attorney!

👋

analogwolf4 said:hmm.. it’s probably tied to male testosterone versus female cycles—you know, progesterone and that other one starting with an E—and how those ratios play out differently in men and women... just a hunch, though... but basically, depression hits because inhibitors (those chemical blockers in the brain) mess with the release of certain hormones that drive behavior... like, they stop the hormone from getting where it needs to go. That’s about as simple as I can put it without getting banned for trying to give a full-blown biochemistry lecture here... 🙂 and this all happens at the synapses—where the nerves connect—but there are honestly so many different reasons why it goes down...

okay, look, I totally get that part and it makes sense—I’ve actually dealt with my own struggles using similar stuff because my kidneys haven't been acting right lately...

But I still feel like that isn't the whole story. At the end of the day, your circumstances, your environment, and a ton of other outside factors play a huge role in depression too...

The real key is figuring out which specific influences are pulling the strings!

analogwolf4 said:ugh... I’m done talking about this!!! Look, all I know is brain physiology—like, what actually triggers certain responses... if you want actual answers to stuff like that, just hop on Google and search "prevalence of depression" or whatever.

Fair enough, and thanks for the tip. I’ll definitely look into it more when I have a spare minute...

I get the physiology side of things, I really do...
but I just don't get why there's such a huge distinction made between men and women...
Maybe that's where it all starts—that first big divide in a person's life?
I mean, isn't a human being just a human being, regardless of anything else?

analogwolf4 said:My bad, I totally misread that... about 10% of the world deals with it. I completely botched what I thought it said about 80%—that’s actually the percentage of people who manage depression using the first two methods, like psychotherapy combined with medication. Everyone else ends up needing things like electroshock therapy... though those are pretty extreme cases. Also, treating depression hits differently for women versus men.

Oh my god, seriously? Who is even using electroshock therapy these days? 😲

And also, what's the deal with the difference between men and women when it comes to this stuff??? 🤔

analogwolf4 said:Look, don't pin this on me—you picked a pretty weak example there, honestly. You’re the one who started coming at people, I was just jumping in... And as for therapists? Just answer me this: why would someone seeing a therapist twice a week decide to take twenty antidepressants and end it all? My point is, if a person won't face their own stuff and actually get off their lazy butt, no therapist in the world is gonna save them.

I mean, there are all kinds of therapists out there!
I only ever went to see one once...

He asks me something, I answer and talk...

And then he falls asleep! 😲

So I just let him nap...

And walked out!

* Look, there are good therapists and bad ones, and some people can handle things on their own while others really need help...
whether that comes from a pro or just from the people around them. *

Honestly, I think there are way more people struggling with depression than anyone actually realizes.
Aren't all those alcoholics, hotheads, workaholics, hysterics, and aggressive types actually just depressed deep down?

I have this neighbor—she’s been on antidepressants for 35 years straight!
Why did she end up this way? Because her intellectual needs were totally different from her husband's.
For example:
She loves the Opera, but to him, it’s just "cats yowling," so he refuses to go—hell, he won't even let her go alone!
It was just one thing after another—desires and needs that were impossible to fulfill. For decades.
And the husband? He’s an alcoholic and a total loose cannon.

Eventually, Bill Gates—well, if you will—just snapped and lost it.
She ended up at the Mayo Clinic.
When she came back, she was just... completely hollowed out. Quiet.
She went about her business, using her meds to get through the essentials. 35 years of that.
Back then, she used to sneak off to read Hemingway when he wasn't home, listening to her favorite classical music, lying that she was going to the doctor just so she could spend time at museums and galleries...
She’s 70 now. Last year was her last stint at the Mayo Clinic.
That was after she reached a breaking point and looked for a place to end it all.

The diagnosis: severe depression and suicidal ideation.

Since coming back from the clinic, she can barely even walk straight.
Whenever I see her, my heart just sinks.
Sometimes she comes over to visit me, and we’ll just sit there listening to classical music and talking about beautiful things...
I’ll read poetry to her from books, whatever she feels like...
She can't even read by herself anymore—those meds just cloud everything.

Sorry, I know this story is a bit long-winded.
I guess I'm saying this because I've seen it in my own life, and as I've gotten older, I see it everywhere in my circle.
Depression doesn't just happen out of thin air; there's always a cause.

Of course, not everyone can spot when someone is depressed. Some people suspect it, but they're too afraid to call someone "crazy." Others lash out, and some try to cope through aggression—either toward themselves or everyone else...

Very few people realize that you actually have to eliminate the CAUSES; you have to shed the burdens and the baggage.

Look, I know it isn't easy or simple.
I know firsthand how hard it is to pull yourself out of quicksand by the collar, but you do it.
It takes time and a lot of patience.

But the most important thing is knowing what *you* want,
setting goals, both big and small.
Reaching for them, and taking care of yourself—physically and spiritually. Giving to yourself.

In my life, I’ve always viewed these struggles as massive concrete walls blocking my path.

Sometimes I’d sprint past them, sometimes I’d patiently find a way around, sometimes I’d blast through with dynamite, and other times I’d build ladders...
wooden ones, or human ones...

Right now, though? I'm standing in front of another wall. I don't have the strength to sprint anymore,
there's no time to detour, my dynamite supply has run out, so I'm just waiting patiently for the kind people who offered to hold up little ladders for me...
Just waiting. Sometimes time solves things. I started letting go of unnecessary burdens a long time ago...
I'm focusing on "self-care"...
*phone, cell, and doorbell are all turned off*

But never drugs; no alcohol, no pills...
that stuff just clouds your vision and your mind, and you could easily lose your way.

Hope is the last thing to die.

😉

Zachary Rodriguez32 said:Man... nothing gets me going quite like hearing people drone on about "natural" versus "synthetic" vitamins and how the "fake" ones are supposedly toxic! 🤣

The "synthetic" stuff isn't even harmful—it's literally NOTHING!!!!