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Maria Jones40 said:Honestly, people, I am genuinely baffled by some of you. I have no idea what century you think we’re living in. Nowadays, things are actually discussed openly. Of course, not every single detail is laid out for the patient—not everyone needs to carry that weight—but the family is always kept in the loop. Especially when dealing with a serious illness, the family deserves to know everything, provided they are willing and able to process it. If half the population in America struggles with basic comprehension, that’s a separate issue entirely. But you don't have the right to constantly bash medical staff or spread blatant misinformation just because you're unhappy.
Look, keeping the family informed is one thing, but is lying really necessary? The surgeon told my brother and me that he had extended our mother's life by three or four years, even though the cancer had already metastasized everywhere. She passed away a month later. Hello? Helloooo???
He could have simply said he performed the surgery to prevent an intestinal blockage and to ensure she didn't suffer needlessly (she had ovarian adenocarcinoma). Instead, I spent three weeks hunting him down at Mayo Clinic over those lies. After she passed, the nurses finally let us know they knew all along there was nothing more they could do.
Then there's my friend's case: her uncle died of lung cancer, and nobody told him anything—though he was already quite frail from brain issues. Then, out of nowhere, the doctor basically drops the bomb at the very end: "Yeah, you have lung cancer, and you've got about a month left."
Where on earth do you live, dear? I realize doctors are human too, and after seeing so much tragedy, they can become desensitized. Sometimes they act incredibly blunt just as a defense mechanism against the emotional toll. But they know—especially oncologists—that they aren't treating minor sniffles or hypochondriacs; they are treating people facing terminal illnesses, and that is heavy work.