Ashley Price57 said:It’s honestly driving me crazy that I have absolutely nothing to wear. I haven't even picked up any maternity pants yet, so I'm just walking around with my button undone because my regular jeans are way too tight. Everything that used to fit perfectly now looks terrible on me. Instead of looking pregnant, I just look bloated and messy. It’s so irritating; I’m genuinely counting down the days until I actually start looking like I'm expecting.
And don't even get me started on my digestion—it’s been a total disaster. I went from being someone who had a very regular schedule to feeling like a literal trash can for waste that just sits inside me for two days straight. All that bloating makes me look pregnant before I actually am, hahahahahahahaha... It’s incredibly frustrating. I suspect people who didn't have regular digestion to begin with probably don't find this quite as maddening as I do..
It also gets under my skin when my grandparents start lecturing me about how "dangerous" ultrasounds are, acting like I'm getting one every single day.. 🙄
That's all for today, back to typing! 😍 😬
My mother-in-law actually gave me that exact same lecture the other day...😠 But what really got under my skin today was this prenatal class. It feels like every day we get a different nurse with their own specific brand of "wisdom," and half the time they’re all saying completely contradictory things. To top it off, the woman leading us today was just incredibly intense—full of these unsolicited pieces of advice, basically telling us we better enjoy ourselves now because once the baby arrives, well, life as we know it is over!!! 😠 Honestly, why on earth do people feel the need to scare pregnant women with those kinds of tropes? "Enjoy it while you can," "Get some sleep while you can," "Eat what you want while you still can"... 😠 It’s genuinely chilling.
It’s honestly so frustrating dealing with extreme sensitivity down there; intimacy is basically off the table for me right now. My gynecologist even suggested I stop waxing altogether and just stick to shaving—which is wild, because I haven't done that since middle school—claiming my glands are swollen or whatever. But the problem is, whenever I shave, I just end up with breakouts and irritated skin everywhere.🙄 At this rate, I might actually have to embrace being a total hair monster.😛
Michael Barrett11 said:It’s honestly pathetic. His uncles, who we actually live with, have so much money they don't even know what to do with it. They could easily cover a kitchen remodel or a bathroom renovation for us without breaking a sweat, but my partner insists on doing everything himself and paying for it all solo. I was honestly on the verge of a nervous breakdown today. Everything just piled up at once, and when it finally started coming to a head, I was nearly in tears. If he really wants to be self-sufficient, he can always take out a loan. I simply cannot deal with living under someone else's thumb, being told what to eat and how to live—I mean that literally. I hit a breaking point today so hard that I actually had to ask my mom to come pick me up. She told me to calm down first (honestly, I could barely speak through the crying), then suggested I sit down and talk things through with him (since I stormed out right in the middle of lunch without eating a bite), and then I should give her a call back.
That is exactly why we choose to rent. I realize it isn't ideal, but my peace of mind is priceless. As for buying a place right now... unfortunately, it’s just not an option for us. We spent six months living in a large apartment with his mother, so I know exactly what you're going through. I felt like I had to watch everything I ate because I don't eat meat, refined carbs, or half the other things I avoid, but God forbid I ever have to go through that again! My family constantly offers to let us move in with them, but we simply don't have the funds for that kind of setup. Whenever someone tries to tell me that renting is just throwing money down the drain, I tell them that I am paying for my freedom, and you can't put a price on that.
Michael Barrett11 said:I didn't say they were unintelligent, I just said they get on my nerves. I actually agree that their strategy is quite clever, but it's frustrating because everyone treats us like we're clueless, as if we can't handle basic math. My mother is the same way—she never complains, even though she’s perpetually overdrawn at Wells Fargo and living in a rental. Her brother-in-law thinks she's loaded and swimming in cash just because she spent a little extra hosting a birthday party and trying out some new recipes. I have a nagging feeling that people are going to start coming to us for handouts pretty soon, too. The truth is, we live with my aunts and they have plenty of money, but they aren't financing our lives; we live off my husband's small business. When we were just working day jobs, we paid for everything ourselves. It never even crossed our minds to ask them for help, regardless of what they have. We have to learn how to survive on whatever my husband brings home.
Oh, believe me, they drive me crazy too!😠 See, that example with your mom proves it—if you don't whine about money, people assume you have plenty! That's how some folks' minds work, and then if you don't hand over a bit of your own, heaven forbid, they act like you're being unreasonable!
Those who complain aren't necessarily being foolish—not at all. I have a personal example of this. Michael Barrett11 and I never spend our time whining, even though we’re just renting right now and dealing with various other pressures. We stay incredibly disciplined about our finances; as he often says, we make sure we have enough of a cushion to cover whatever unexpected expenses come our way. But we don't vent about it. And you wouldn't believe how often people try to hit us up for money just because they see us staying composed. It seems like everyone—friends, family, anyone—acts as if we’re the local Chase Bank, simply because we aren't constantly broadcasting our struggles. No one stops to consider that we’d much rather be putting that money toward buying our own home than lending it out to everyone else... (though clearly, they don't grasp how heavy the burden of a mortgage can actually be). So, it turns out that those "complainers" aren't actually mindless; sometimes, airing your grievances is actually a very smart survival strategy.
jadejackal11 said:Everything is just getting on my nerves lately... ugh... Before I went sober, I used to enjoy a few 🙂 Now, my whole outlook has flipped 180 degrees. It doesn't bother me personally, but I honestly wish the same thing would happen to everyone else. I wish everybody was pregnant!!! I feel like such a party pooper now, constantly nitpicking everything. It's Christmas, my dear would be out celebrating and calling people... while I just want to curl up on the couch and watch a movie... ugh...
I feel that on a visceral level. Honestly, it’s the constant unsolicited advice and people constantly overstepping boundaries—whether it's poking around my business or making comments about my physical appearance—that really gets under my skin. But if I’m being truly honest with myself, the most frustrating part is my own nature. I am a perpetual idealist and a romantic at heart. I find myself constantly believing in the inherent goodness of people and holding onto this vision of how things should be, only to be met with the same old disappointments from the exact same people, over and over again. It feels like a cycle I just can't seem to break, no matter how many times I get burned.
Peter Doyle2 said:So, I’m officially, very early pregnant 😍—but honestly, the comments are already getting under my skin—mostly from family, too—about how things "used to be done" or how they handled their own kids back in the day. I mean, I’m only five weeks along and I’m already getting "advice" claiming that breastfeeding isn't enough once a baby hits three months. 😲
I would honestly give all the money I have right now to have someone install a chip in my brain—one ear in, one ear out—because I don't think I'll ever learn how to tune this stuff out on my own. 🙄
If they're starting this much now, goodness knows what happens after the baby actually arrives. 😲
Oh, and yeah, people around me constantly point out that I'm "too informed" or that I "read too much." 🤷 Great, so I guess I should just stay miserable and blindly accept advice that is, well, at least 20 years outdated? Because apparently, it's "stupid" to follow the modern medical consensus that breastfeeding is perfectly sufficient for a three-month-old. 🙄 I have no idea why anyone thinks that's even worth mentioning. 😠
I’m almost looking forward to when the hormones really kick in, so maybe then I can finally learn how to snap back at these comments without feeling guilty about it. 😁 ☕
I feel your pain. It’s especially draining when it comes from my own mother—who also happens to be my mother-in-law. Their lack of basic awareness is genuinely maddening, but the most frustrating part isn't even the ignorance itself; it's the inevitable defense mechanism. Whenever I try to point out why they're wrong, I just get hit with that classic, "Well, this is just how we are, so what's your problem?" attitude.😠 I told my husband that if things continue this way after the baby arrives, I’m simply going to lock the door. No one is getting in. And when the inevitable fallout happens? I'll just blame it on the postpartum hormones. It’s a foolproof plan.
It honestly just leaves me feeling completely unsettled. It’s especially irritating because I’m not even overweight—I haven't gained much weight at all, and my stomach is barely even showing—yet I still have these older women constantly commenting on how I’ve "filled out" or how my face looks "so much fuller" and pretty now. Honestly? F*** off, everyone.😠
Harold Cook2 said:Honestly, people over the last couple of days have irritated me way more than being pregnant ever did.😠 We just had some snow fall here, and apparently, that’s a massive freaking miracle because it doesn't happen all the time around here. So, there I am, just trying to walk my dog and hit up the local grocery store like I do every single day, when suddenly I run into the neighbors and everyone on the block starts acting like I’m losing my mind. It’s always the same thing—"Oh my god, are you okay? Are you trying to go into labor early? Are you crazy for walking in the snow? Who even let you outside?" etc., etc...😛 People are seriously out of their minds. It drives me absolutely nuts. I put on my leggings, watched my step, and moved along. I’m not an invalid or some helpless wreck just because I’m pregnant; I walk just fine, I just happen to have a belly now, and that doesn't mean I can't step foot outside once in a while.😕Then I get to the store to grab some bread, and the cashier gives me that exact same look—like, why on earth would you be out in this weather? My blood pressure shot through the roof immediately.😠 Seriously, such weirdos.
Reading this feels like listening to my own mother and mother-in-law. They call me every single day just to tell me it's snowing. Please, I'm not blind! Personally, I love the snow, and my husband and I still take our daily walks around the neighborhood. If I actually told my mom that, I think she'd lock me in the house and throw away the key. Other people haven't really given me a hard time yet because my bump isn't super obvious, but I have no doubt they'll start up soon enough.
rustyrider3 said:Hey there, mamas-to-be 🙂 I’ve been sitting here laughing and crying at the same time. I’ve read through so much stuff on here, but honestly? I just feel so incredibly alone in what I’m going through right now... So, here’s the deal: I’m 21 weeks along, and my entire world has basically flipped upside down since I found out. People I actually considered "friends" started hitting me with those nasty comments way back in the first trimester—you know, the "oh, you're gonna lose your figure" type of crap. And now that my bump is finally showing? It’s almost hysterical how they react (seriously, WHAT?!?!?!). Especially when my husband is standing right there with me, they try to belittle me by pointing out how "thin" they are, implying that I’ve just "let myself go" or whatever. Like, really? Those are just the tip of the iceberg. Don't even get me started on the people suggesting my husband is probably out looking for someone else because I’m "unattractive" now... It’s gross. On top of that, my family is being so unsupportive it hurts. My own mother actually looked me in the eye and said, "Don't think for a second I'm babysitting once the baby arrives; you have no clue what kind of responsibility this actually is." Excuse me? I’m 30 years old, I’ve had a career for a decade, and I’ve been running my own life with my husband for years. So, yeah... I feel absolutely terrible. Maybe I should be talking to a therapist instead of posting on a forum... but if anyone else has dealt with something similar, it would mean the world to hear some actual advice (and please, don't just tell me to "ignore them," because that's easier said than done...) 😢 😢 😢
😲 I honestly don't know what to say to those "friends" of yours, other than that I wouldn't want to be in the same room as them. They aren't friends. If you hadn't mentioned you were 30, I would have assumed we were talking about teenagers. In any case, please don't let their toxicity get under your skin; at least now you know who your real friends are. And forget the psychologist—don't stress yourself out, lady, you're growing a little human!😍 Just focus on your husband and your life; pretty soon you'll find yourself naturally gravitating toward other parents anyway... In the meantime, you have this forum, which has been indispensable to me!😁
placidwalker6 said:And what’s it to anyone else how big your belly is, seriously? 🙄 It’s exactly how it should be, and it looks damn good. 😛 God, people can be such... 🤮
Do you guys feel like you've caught some nasty, contagious, incurable disease from the second you found out you were pregnant??? Because honestly, that’s exactly how it feels to me, I swear. Suddenly, I have nobody to grab a coffee with, and it seems like this "illness" spreads even over the phone, making it hard for everyone to even 😢take a call. I just feel incredibly lonely and kind of down about the whole thing. 😢
Yes. Though not quite in the way you described; for me, it’s more about the constant stream of patronizing advice—"stay warm," "dress warmly," "make sure you eat," "get some sleep"... It's as if they think I'm an idiot. As if I wasn't already doing those things.😠 What really gets under my skin, though, is that this comes from people who aren't even close to me, or people who weren't even on board with the idea of having kids in the first place... so it feels like this massive, performative display of concern, and frankly, I'm sick of it. I have already told certain people a hundred times that I am not incompetent, I am not sick, and I am not disabled. They don't need to treat me like I've changed; I am still the same person. Please, just get that through your heads. It drives me absolutely insane.
And as for the size of my stomach, ohhh, don't worry, there is always someone with a comment. Mine is supposedly "too small"... and based on its shape, everyone is convinced it's a boy (which it isn't, but it doesn't matter... grandmothers always know, right?) and the cycle continues indefinitely...
Like I mentioned before, it seems that once you become pregnant, you essentially become public property. Everyone feels entitled to comment on your body, touch you, and offer unsolicited advice as if they all graduated from medical school or spent their lives running a daycare center.
And now that poor woman spent forty-five days walking around with greasy, gross hair 👎
And clearly with dirty hands too, since you aren't even allowed to get your hands wet!🤣 It remains a total mystery how she could have touched a baby with hands like that.
I heard some "well-meaning" advice today that honestly left me speechless: "Don't wash your hands after giving birth!" My immediate reaction was 😕, because if you're forty-five days postpartum, you're basically walking on eggshells trying to recover, so you have to be careful. I wouldn't even let my daughter wash her hair for forty-five days! Me: 😲 wtf???
I’m on the lookout for a solid internist or cardiologist in the Cleveland area—doesn't matter if they take insurance or if I need to see them privately. If anyone has a reliable recommendation, please let me know. I'm also open to traveling to Washington, D.C., if that's where the better specialists are located.
Kyle Lee6 said:aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ugh, okay, so this was hands down the most annoying thing for me too!!! It was especially bad because every single day, some nurse would ask me the exact same thing. And every single day, I’d have to respond with, "I don't understand—what do you mean by 'came back to life'???"—just me and a few other moms dealing with the same nonsense. And honestly, if anyone actually told them that I intentionally ended things at five weeks, they’d act all horrified like I could have even killed a baby... I mean, how can you kill something that wasn't even living yet? (Okay, maybe I'm being a bit dramatic, but man, that question just... ugh!😠)
For me, the worst part is that my own mother asks me this—and she does it just as often as your mother-in-law does!😠😠 😠And here I was thinking my mom was a rational woman who actually understands medical science!🙄 When I tell her the baby is alive, she just shrugs and goes, "Oh, don't get so upset, it's just an expression." 😠 To me, that sounds absolutely revolting.
Honestly, the way people phrase things just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. They ask, "Did the baby come back to life?" Like, what does that even mean? The baby *is* alive! When they say "came back to life," it sounds like they’re asking if I can feel movement or something, but the wording is just so clumsy and insensitive. It’s such an ugly way to put it.
Patrick Grant14 said:Exactly. I reserve the right to claim I'm being driven crazy by hormones, but when someone else tries to use that excuse for me, I end up sounding like this:
OH, IT'S JUST HORMONES, IS IT? MAYBE IF I BROKE MY TEETH OUT RIGHT NOW, YOU'D FINALLY UNDERSTAND WHAT A REAL MOOD SWING LOOKS LIKE!???????????????????
Absolute madness...
😂😂😂 I know the feeling!🤣 But honestly, I'm not even halfway through this pregnancy yet, and I'm already terrified of what the rest of it is going to look like.
Honestly, I’m getting on my own nerves today. I can’t even begin to explain it. I woke up feeling actually decent, and now I’m just sitting here having these random crying fits—all because I love my baby so much. It sounds completely insane, doesn't it? But yeah... it's just the hormones.
And let’s be real, calling this "the glow" is such a joke. It’s actually pretty brutal—constipation, hemorrhoids, back pain, weird discharge, bleeding gums, mood swings, zero interest in sex, and the constant stress of dodging anything even remotely questionable when it comes to food or drinks... not to mention the endless anxiety over every single lab result or ultrasound. You spend half your time wondering if everything is okay, if the scan looks normal, if things will turn out fine, and if I’ll even be a decent parent. What a "blissful" experience this truly is!
Honestly, my husband really got under my skin today—to the point where I actually broke down in tears. Usually, he’s wonderful, but between my hormones and his stubborn "manly" attitude, it was just a perfect storm. We were talking earlier, and I mentioned how excited I am for our 12-week ultrasound; it's going to be the first time we see the baby together. Instead of sharing that moment, he just brushed me off, saying, "You know when that is? There's plenty of time. I still have to work until then, and besides, it's easy for you since you're just sitting at home!" WTF!!!! I've been stuck inside all day feeling miserable, dealing with a cold and feeling completely run down, yet I'm still the one cooking him lunch and keeping up with the laundry so everything is ready for him. And then I get hit with that "easy for you because you're home" comment. It’s almost like he's jealous that I'm on medical leave. Well... newsflash: I'm the one doing the heavy lifting here, not you. + And let’s be real, my entire life is about to be flipped upside down, while his barely changes. I can't go to concerts anymore because I'm constantly worried about the noise affecting the baby, and I have to be so careful about what I eat and how I move. Meanwhile, his lifestyle stays exactly the same—football games, grabbing drinks with the guys, concerts... it's like that. So instead of being happy with me about this upcoming ultrasound, he offers absolutely nothing.😢
I’ve started to feel a bit irritated lately—though most people don't even know I'm pregnant yet since I'm not showing—by the fact that absolutely everyone who *does* know seems to have some horror story about childbirth ready to go. Or they pivot immediately to how exhausting life with a newborn is, offering those unsolicited "helpful" tips like, "Oh, you better get all the sleep you can now, because you won't see it again," and so on. It’s just constant. 🙂 Not a single soul has thought to share a beautiful story or a positive perspective with me. Honestly, I can't quite wrap my head around why there's such an overwhelming urge to focus on the negatives!
Since we’re on the subject of pregnant women getting priority in waiting rooms—well, my bump isn't even showing yet, but logically, I figured I’d get some preferential treatment at the OB-GYN. Instead, I end up sitting there for three hours because every single pregnant woman in the building was ahead of me, along with a few elderly ladies who spent the entire time lecturing everyone that pregnancy isn't an illness. They kept going on about how things were different back in their day, when pregnant women actually got priority, calling our current system ridiculous and nonsense. Then, finally, it’s my turn, and one of those old ladies looks at me and goes: "Wait, you aren't pregnant too?" Me: Yes. Old lady:🙄🙄🙄 And she wouldn't even let me cut in front of her! Honestly, thank goodness the doctor stepped out into the hallway for a second and pulled me aside, giving that lady a piece of her mind for being so incredibly rude.
To seems perfectly logical to me—abstaining from sex for 24 hours before a gynecologist appointment. I’ve never given it much deep thought before, but it strikes me similarly to how one might show up to a dentist appointment after eating something right beforehand, arriving with messy teeth... I know, it's a bit of a silly comparison, but the thought just popped into my head.🙂