Posts by Olivia Smith2

Amanda Jackson5 said:So, if the facts themselves are wrong, does that mean we just flip the script and assume the non-facts are suddenly true?

Nope—not quite like that.

Amanda Jackson5 said:

"In this day and age, Hegel's reputation has plummeted so far that calling a theory Hegelian has become almost an insult. And yet, at the turn of the millennium, it suddenly dawned on many that Hegel didn't just predict nearly all the philosophical developments that followed him, but actually critiqued them quite successfully. Nowadays, when being a 'postmodernist' is the trendy label to grab, it’s honestly pretty silly—though admittedly very common—to dive into a philosophical project without having any deep roots in the Hegelian method."

David Gray Carlson, "a Commentary on Hegel's science of Logic"

Beyond those colorful metaphors, though, I haven't heard anyone explain what the actual distinction is between a fact and the truth. Are facts even true?

Not really. They aren't.

It’s true that Kant essentially torched metaphysics—but the reality is, metaphysics just kept moving forward anyway.
The truth is that Classical German Idealism hit a breaking point, yet the fact remains that people are still out there engaging with Hegel.

Olivia Bishop8 said:Man, this illness is just brutal... Reading through everything you guys are going through (I'm not the one sick, my son is), it’s honestly pretty terrifying. He’s in remission right now, I guess, but I can't help worrying about his future and what his life is even going to look like. He's 25 now, just stays inside, doesn't work, doesn't go out, doesn't really hang with anyone besides a few close family members. He tells me he feels fine, but after reading all your stories, I suspect he's struggling way more than he lets on.
I don't even know, honestly, who has it worse—him or me as a parent.
How do you even escape this nightmare?

What exactly was his diagnosis, and how long has he been in remission? People recovering from psychosis often need quite a bit of time to "wash off" those psychotic thoughts—even if they seem to be doing better right now. Time is such a critical factor, and those around them really need to understand that. It’s vital that the individual moves in a direction that feels right for them, while their support system remains confident that this path is leading toward actual recovery.

Personally, it took me a little over two years to clear out all that psychotic residue. The real tragedy is that this chaos usually hits people right when they are supposed to be finding their footing and carving out their place in the world.

I was lucky enough to have some self-control. I actually toyed with some pretty dark, perverse content and practically drove myself to the brink of madness. Once I realized how destructive that was, I did the exact opposite. I suppose I was lucky enough to succeed at being paradoxical—just as I had turned health into sickness, I worked to turn my illness back toward health because I knew what was hurting me. Despite spending two incredibly important years in a near-vegetative state, I eventually landed a great job, enrolled in another college program, and started working as someone who cares for others. I say all this with a grain of salt, though, because psychosis is a brutal thing and there is no guaranteed cure or outcome. But there is always hope. 🙂

Hello to everyone navigating this difficult topic. This whole situation started after some intense back pain I've been dealing with for the last two months—doctors kept insisting it was just shoulder arthritis, but it turned out to be this instead.

If anyone here has gone through something similar—or if you happen to know much about lung cancer—I would be incredibly grateful for any insight you could share. I just want to be as prepared as possible, because, honestly, this doesn't look good. And I'm not even talking about myself.

Thank you all.

https://ibb.co/98K8G3b

Henry Fisher74 said:I think there might be a mistake with the medication 🤔
And honestly, maybe those things are just weighing you down too much or keeping you stuck.

Another thing I've noticed is how much weight you're putting on this diagnosis.
As long as you let it be this massive, defining thing in your life, it’s going to feel more powerful than you are.
But in reality, it isn't. You're—and always will be—stronger than that. It’s just about figuring out how you function so you can get ahead of it. (If you've been seeing a therapist for a while now, maybe it's time for a change. You should have seen some progress by now.)

You're absolutely right. Ever since my episode happened, I lost so much confidence that I couldn't even hold a basic conversation with people. I wasted several years living in fear—just waiting for the next episode to hit. I would overanalyze every single thought from every possible angle, losing all faith in my own judgment and logic. That diagnosis ended up triggering some pretty intense self-stigma.

redranger2 said:It feels as though there is a glaring absence of an effective antidepressant in this current treatment plan, so I would strongly suggest that the original poster take this up directly with their psychiatrist.

Ad can sometimes trigger a new episode. It’s rarely prescribed to people who have experienced or are prone to losing touch with reality.

Maria Price3 said:Look, people aren't stupid. We just patch ourselves up, scrape by, and keep moving. You can either spend your entire life living in constant fear of a psychotic break—dealing with the nightmares and all that—or you can actually deal with it. I guess we aren't psychiatrists here, so we shouldn't be handing out medical advice, but maybe there’s room to tweak your regimen to make things a bit more bearable. It probably wouldn't hurt to seek out a second opinion, too.
I'm no expert, but I suspect Ad might actually trigger a psychotic episode, so combining it might not be the best move. If you did go that route, you’d likely have to bump up the Ap. Honestly, finding the right balance is such a massive headache; it takes a ridiculous amount of time. Maybe you should just figure it out as you go—though I suppose that depends on how much time you have before things spiral. If I were in your shoes, I’d ask my doctor about adjusting things to dial down the anxiety, and I’d definitely track down a solid pharmacologist for a second opinion.

I've started tackling some of my biggest fears lately, and I can say I'm feeling better. Significantly better. Though, being a bit of a pessimist, I can't help but wonder—how long will this feeling last? 😬

hiddenheron3 said:I’m with a few of the recent comments here—you’re putting way too much weight on some label or diagnosis. Once you actually see the kind of people you'll be dealing with in the real world, you’ll realize how lucky you are to just have what you have. 😁

Jokes aside...

A day has 24 hours, and honestly, nobody is going to notice if you lose 60 minutes while your brain is basically mush. (Unless you’re a surgeon, obviously.) Just take a job you actually enjoy.

Thanks for the advice and the support. I’ve already started making some small moves. It’s moving at a decent pace so far—hopefully, everything works out fine. 🙂

fadedbear92 said:I’m guessing you’re on some kind of medication—if you are, you really ought to stick to the regimen so that anxiety doesn't just wash you away entirely

There are just so many unknowns in all of this—how can anyone truly be sure? When I was on those high doses of antipsychotics, I suspect akathisia kicked in as a side effect, though I mostly just felt incredibly restless. I would pace around my house constantly—is that even normal? Honestly, I think the real culprit was the emotional fallout from a breakup I was still reeling from. It dragged on far too long, and my psychiatrist didn't seem to notice at all—it took months before they finally handed me a diagnosis of Generalized Anxiety Disorder.

After experiencing psychosis, it feels like both my mind and body have gone completely haywire—it's as if all those repressed emotions are suddenly resurfacing at once. I have this sense that my brain is taking a massive shortcut whenever stress hits; does that even make sense? In those high-pressure moments, I end up regressing to acting like a child again—just incredibly tense, frozen, and shaking uncontrollably.

I’m really not sure how much credit to give the therapy itself—mostly because my psychiatrist has me on such a minimal dose of antipsychotics, along with everything else meant to keep me steady—but does anyone else feel that way?

fadedbear92 said:Did you just decide to quit your meds on your own?
You can't play games when it comes to psychosis.

Not quite—the plan was to taper off the antipsychotics gradually until they were completely discontinued. I'm actually restarting them now because my tension levels have spiked again. I don't fully grasp the logic behind how these medications work—why this specific approach is necessary—but I'm following the doctor's lead.

It’s interesting—my psychiatrist actually told me I wasn't "psychotic enough" to be unable to handle certain things. I asked if that meant I was still somewhat psychotic, and he just laughed—kind of dismissively—saying, "Don't overthink it, you know what happened." It makes me wonder... does experiencing even a single psychotic episode permanently warp your perception of reality? Or is that just an assumption? Strange, isn't it?

William Sanders6 said:Based on your level of self-awareness and the way you express yourself, it's clear you're quite intelligent, though
- you should probably talk to your doctor about adjusting your medication; maybe a different combination would suit you better.
- try tackling small challenges every day that trigger just a hint of discomfort—that familiar anxiety. Push yourself slightly and overcome those minor hurdles daily.
- you need to build some structure into your routine, specifically regarding exercise. Working out triggers that natural endorphin rush, and you'll likely see progress over time. Plus, whenever anxious thoughts start creeping in, physical activity can help; rhythmic movement, controlled breathing, even counting your reps—it all acts as therapy for both mind and body.
- I'd suggest shifting your mindset regarding these job opportunities. You might mess them up, you might nail them, or you might find they're actually more interesting than you anticipated, which could spark some much-needed motivation and drive. That alone could contribute to a healthier lifestyle. You never really know. It’s best to approach this with an open, relaxed mind—which is hard when you're dealing with anxiety—but staying open to both failure and success without being so tense might help things fall into place naturally.

Someone mentioned once that anxiety is essentially just being obsessed with the past or the future. There's a lot of truth in that. That's why it's vital to focus on the tasks directly in front of you right now. Every option remains on the table, but you reach them one step at a time, not all at once (trying to jump ahead is exactly what fuels that terrifying, anxious feeling). So, I suppose you should look at these opportunities as a bit of a game. Even if they don't work out, it doesn't mean you're incompetent or incapable. Quite the opposite. In the worst-case scenario, you'll find a way to pivot and start over. I say that because of how you write and how self-aware you seem to be regarding yourself and the world.

Just take it easy, one step at a time.

Thank you.

Adam Morris4 said:Honestly, if you're just dealing with anxiety, jumping straight to an antipsychotic feels like using a sledgehammer to crack a nut. Usually, doctors would look at starting you on some antidepressants, maybe a little bit of benzos for a short window to steady things out, and then just taking it as needed... Now, don't get me wrong, your current dose isn't massive, but there's a catch. As those meds gradually block your dopamine receptors over time, you can start hitting this wall of emotional numbness, akathisia, heightened anxiety, or even depression. It’s a nasty cycle. In a worst-case scenario, if long-term antipsychotics are actually necessary, they really should have paired them with an antidepressant to prevent you from sliding into the headspace you're stuck in right now...
In the best-case scenario, though—assuming the psychosis doesn't come back and you aren't dealing with schizophrenia like you mentioned—you might be able to phase out the antipsychotics entirely...
And I think it goes without saying that staying away from drugs is non-negotiable... For someone in your position, recreational use is a direct ticket to psychosis...
Sometimes, it really only takes one bad trip to derail your entire life.

And definitely go for that job, provided it's something you actually want to do.

As I mentioned, I managed to go a few months without antipsychotics and the psychosis didn't come back. However—whether I was on them or not—that underlying tension never really left me. I do understand what the psychiatrists were thinking, though; that constant tension can trigger a psychotic episode, so they were likely just trying to protect me by introducing the medication.
Thanks for the encouragement. I'll grab some Rivotril, get moving, and hopefully—finally—start seeing some wins in life.

velvetmaker18 said:Are you actually stoked about this job waiting for you? Like, is this really what you want to be doing with your life? Are you gonna feel fulfilled in a career like this? Honestly, I feel like when things aren't clicking mentally, it’s often because you’re just unfulfilled deep down. Of course, everyone’s different, right? But if you’re forcing yourself into something under all this pressure, I can’t help but think you’re just setting yourself up for another cycle of the same old thing. Since this is exactly what you've been dreading, it really comes down to one big question: do you dive headfirst into the grind to try and "make something of yourself," or do you just take a beat for yourself? Maybe meditate, find some peace, and figure out what actually makes you happy and whole.

I've been meditating for quite a while now—though unfortunately, most of us can't always afford to sit back and spend years calculating our next moves. And yes, I would love to pursue that path. My only real worry is whether my body will be able to keep up.

Adam Morris4 said:Have you considered that what you're describing might actually be a side effect of the antipsychotics?
When people are in the middle of a psychotic break, they aren't usually worrying about how they come across or feeling super anxious about their speech...
In fact, they can often seem oddly confident in their own reality...
To me, it sounds like you might be dealing with a heavy dosage of medication, which raises the question of whether you'd even slip back into psychosis without them...
Assuming you don't have chronic schizophrenia.

Sent from my Galaxy S10 using Reddit

It makes sense—to a certain extent, anyway. Before the antipsychotics wore off, I used to play the "bad boy" at the hospital whenever I was interacting with nurses, social workers, or psychologists. They would then pass those impressions along to my psychiatrist, even though I was perfectly calm, polite, and lucid during our sessions. There wasn't any anxiety back then—just a lot of restlessness because I was simultaneously ending a relationship that meant everything to me.

I went through periods of depersonalization and this general sense of numbness—which I blamed on the medication—while I waited for the chance to stop taking them. Other than that, I was terrified of having another psychotic episode. That numbness was my biggest worry; it feels like it’s actually what caused me to develop this anxiety over time (along with the fear of relapsing).

I don't have developed schizophrenia—that isn't my diagnosis. I just had one episode about two years ago.

I was off the antipsychotics for a while, but because the tension was so high, I ended up on a low dose of Quetiapine (just 50 mg, which is really just meant to settle the system). My regular doctor wasn't available at my last appointment, so I saw a different psychiatrist instead. When we started talking, my voice was trembling and I mentioned how tense I felt, so she bumped my dose up to 150 mg (SR). About a month and a half later, I started feeling that antipsychotic fog again—feeling slower and more blunt (which is the last thing I need right now).

My doctor told me that 150 mg isn't much; apparently, some people take that just for mild depression, whereas doses for psychotic disorders usually range from 800 to 1000 mg.

So, I'm honestly not sure if this restlessness is due to the meds. I felt restless even without them, though I have to admit—it could definitely be akathisia.

Andrew Barrett4 said:So, how do you typically handle things when the pressure really starts to mount?

Honestly, I used to handle things quite well—I actually enjoyed pushing my boundaries and stepping out of my comfort zone.

Since the psychosis, though—everything has changed. My heart starts racing, my hands shake—sometimes even my voice—and the absolute worst part is how my brain just turns to mush. My thoughts get completely tangled, I lose the ability to tell if what I'm saying makes sense, and my focus just vanishes... It all happens at once—it’s a total nightmare.

graniteridge31 said:

.I honestly can't make sense of anything lately, other than feeling constant fear—it's been a total nightmare these past few days. :

The media has really ramped up this fear-mongering campaign over the last year. I'd suggest staying away from it entirely—unless you feel like you actually need to feed into that negativity. It's your call, I suppose.

...I felt immediate pressure to find some "normal" job ASAP... Just the thought of any work at all was causing me anxiety and worry... I feel like I might just have to try anything.

A "normal" job usually implies financial security, but given the current global climate of fear, instability, and what feels like an intentional economic meltdown, that doesn't mean much. Even without these forced stressors, a standard job isn't a guarantee of happiness. Even if you inherited billions and had top-tier social status, that's still just material security; you're just avoiding dissatisfaction caused by lack, which is really just the lowest level of needs. No amount of money guarantees fulfillment because there are so many higher levels of needs to consider.
When picking a career, or really anything else, I think you should go with whatever draws you in more or gets you excited—something that boosts your energy.
On a scale of 1 to 10—where 1 is a job so soul-crushing you're debating whether to jump off a bridge or just take it, and 10 is a divine opportunity you can't resist, where you feel like you're in heaven and have enough energy to power the sun—just look at what's available and pick whatever is even slightly better than the rest. If your only options are 1, 1.18, or 1.19, then grab the 1.19. If you have a 7 or higher, always choose what attracts you most. Not just in work, but in everything. You'll be happier if you do what makes you happy. Things aren't perfect, and you still have to worry about bills, but I guess you should just pick the best thing currently on the table and keep choosing better things until you hit those double digits. Choosing based on your own criteria is a pretty powerful thing.

If I could actually pull it off—and I mean really pull it off—I’d take a few more years of pure psychological peace, just away from all the stress. Constant pressure is exactly what makes mental health so difficult to manage, isn't it? It's hard to find even a basic sense of stability when you're always on edge.
I’m not quite in that same boat—not because I don't rely on others, but because there are people in my family who depend on me, too. It definitely adds a layer of pressure to make a move, doesn't it? It’s forced me to finally take action—something that has been missing for the last two years.
When you’re dealing with mental health struggles—like I am right now—even a cold beer out in the great American outdoors just doesn't cut it. It's that serotonin imbalance, you know? You put it quite nicely, but it feels like reality is a bit more complicated than that—and maybe we just have to accept it as it is.

Sam Martinez9 said:I disagree. Honestly, there was incomparably more fear in the past. Even children have always been frightened by fairy tales—think about Little Red Riding Hood being eaten by a wolf, the Three Little Pigs having their houses blown down, or even just the idea of a little sparrow starving to death. For adults, we’ve historically had religions that used the threat of witches, hell, or divine retribution to instill fear.

Then you have the justified fears. Before the modern era, people lived in constant, daily anxiety over whether they could actually provide enough food for their families or if their children would succumb to disease. Those fears were grounded in reality because infant mortality rates were incredibly high. In my own family, my grandmother gave birth to seven children, and only three of them survived.

That isn't how job hunting works. Someone might dream of being an astronaut, but if they haven't completed the necessary schooling and if there isn't a demand for astronauts in the economy, they aren't going to get hired as one.

Essentially, the first requirement is that the job market actually needs the role you want; the second is that you possess the specialized training and knowledge required to perform that specific work.

Everything else is just a bedtime story.

I couldn't agree more. I find myself in quite a paradoxical situation myself—if you can call it that. Because of my mental health, I’ve been looking for light work in warehouses, but there's always a catch... I lack the certification for forklift operation, yet because I have a college degree, some employers tell me they can't hire me—which is a bit of a head-scratcher, isn't it? The paradox is that I am actually being offered the kind of life I dreamed of when I first started my studies. Of course, the real question now is whether I have enough mental energy to handle it all. I haven't tried yet.

Andrew Barrett4 said:What exactly set off the psychotic episode?

And I wonder, was it just a one-off thing, or are we talking about a pervasive state of being that you're essentially just managing or suppressing with medication?

Love, passion, drama—just massive amounts of stress. As time went on, I started developing these wild ideas—essentially trying to synthesize opposing theories from different pieces of literature.
Whether this is a chronic condition remains to be seen. I’m one of those rare cases who experimented with various substances during treatment; at one point, I even went off all my meds entirely. That lasted a few months, but my anxiety just kept climbing. So, they put me back on a low dose of antipsychotics—which I definitely feel the side effects of—along with anxiolytics and benzodiazepines. This current way of living honestly feels somewhat senseless. People around me think everything is fine, but they didn't see how I reacted during the high-stress moments. They don't believe me when I speak up.
Now, I'm facing the prospect of returning to my studies while balancing a fast-paced job involving teamwork.

Laura Castillo6 said:Yeah, it can really knock you sideways, almost like dealing with a stroke. Even though we tend to categorize mental health struggles into different boxes, honestly, every single one is its own unique battle.

If those medications are actually helping you stay on track—you know, holding down a job, sleeping through the night, eating right, getting some downtime—then you really need to give yourself some credit. You’re doing great. Like I’ve mentioned before, mental health issues can be incredibly debilitating, and unfortunately, sometimes they leave a lasting mark on a person.

What you really need to lean into right now is focus. Try to ground yourself in the "now" instead of spiraling over what *might* happen. If you feel like you can tackle something, just give it a shot. If it works, awesome. If it doesn't, just hit the brakes, take a breath, and try a different angle from scratch.

At the end of the day, anxiety usually stems from dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. For someone dealing with an anxiety disorder, the real struggle is finding a way to stay present in the moment. It sounds simple, but if you can manage to channel your energy into something specific—like a project at work, for example—all that anxiety starts to fade into the background.

It’s pretty much the same story with most struggles; once you find something else to pour your attention into, everything else becomes secondary.

Of course, you have to be realistic about what you can handle. But generally speaking, getting back out there, socializing, and finding some kind of work or routine is vital for recovery.

As soon as I was discharged from the hospital, my family assumed I was exactly the same as I was before. There was immediate pressure to find a "normal" job right away. Whether I liked it or not, I ignored them and spent my days in bed because I knew the psychotic episodes hadn't fully cleared out yet. But I realize now that I have to take a step forward—to break out of this cycle of just eating and sleeping. The job I'm doing currently is only for a few hours; I can't make a living with it.

Off-topic: I also found the constant push to exercise and do recreational activities at the hospital so frustrating. On the inside, nothing is actually changing; you just look better to people on the outside. I didn't see any real benefit from it. The psychiatrists kept grilling me about whether I was working, and when I told them I worked a few hours a day, they acted like that was perfectly fine. I kept telling them repeatedly that I can't live off that income and that I'm constantly going into debt, but they just didn't seem to care.

Donna White50 said:Honestly, it all comes down to what kind of work challenge we're talking about. If the job is something that actually brings you peace and a sense of fulfillment, then yeah, it’ll probably have a positive effect. But if it’s one of those high-pressure gigs that just cranks up your anxiety, spikes your fears, and leaves you feeling totally overwhelmed by the demands... man, you probably shouldn't dive into that. It'll just end up wrecking your mental health even more...

Exactly. For me, even the thought of any kind of work used to trigger anxiety and worry. But now? I just don't have the luxury of time anymore. I honestly don't know where my limits are, considering I haven't tried anything or even moved from my spot in two years.

Carl Cox3 said:Reading your words, I suspect the medication isn't working. You claim there is no progress after two years of treatment. Something feels off. If the therapy were effective, wouldn't you feel more like yourself? 🤔

I'm not entirely sure if my current medication dosage is hitting the mark—but let's be honest, psychiatry can feel incredibly limited sometimes. When I'm on the stronger stuff, I feel much calmer—though my cognitive clarity definitely takes a hit. Once the dose drops, my mental sharpness returns—but then I'm left dealing with nervousness and tremors. It’s just one endless cycle, isn't it?

Jack Jones7 said:I’m honestly not sure what to tell you. I didn't deal with full-blown psychosis, just "only" anxiety, yet even that was enough to sideline me from a career that would be demanding for any average, healthy person anyway.

If the job is decent and doesn't demand intense, non-stop concentration, I’d probably give it a shot if I were in your shoes.

I feel like I need to try anything at this point—really, anything. I realize that even for someone off their medication, just getting moving again after all this time would be a struggle, not to mention worrying. In my case, it feels several degrees more intense than that. I have to give it a shot, if only to see where my limits actually lie? Nothing makes sense right now, other than the fact that I am terrified—honestly, these last few days have been a total nightmare. 😢

briskpuma6 said:But I have to ask: why on earth are you still asking basic questions on a forum when you've been on this treatment plan for over two years now?

I honestly don't know; two years is plenty of time to learn something—about the world or about yourself. If you're supposedly doing well with the learning part, why haven't you bothered to study your own emotions or your own psyche?

Seriously, we're talking about two full years, not some forty-eight-hour stint. In my eighteen months of dealing with this, I’ve practically devoured psychology textbooks, practiced meditation, and done the deep work of understanding myself, my family, and my surroundings.

By now, you really should realize that a career won't bring you any peace if it clashes with who you actually are; it will just trigger anxiety, depression, and panic attacks. Not to mention the splitting, depersonalization, derealization, and neurosis—all of which, based on what you've told us, you're already struggling with.

I'm not sure what kind of mental health struggles you've faced. Psychosis is a 10/10 on the difficulty scale. For me, that first year was spent essentially flushing out psychotic thoughts, only for anxiety to start creeping in afterward.

If I hadn't been lucky enough to love reading—and if I hadn't used metacognition to recognize the psychosis while putting in massive effort to seek psychiatric help on my own—I would have ended up in a much worse place.

It is entirely possible to have absolute clarity regarding yourself and your environment while still struggling mentally. Even psychiatrists can fall victim to psychosis and anxiety. Theory is one thing, but practice is quite another, isn't it?

As I mentioned, I struggled with reading and cognition in general; I was fully aware that I was using sleep as an escape from reality. But again, theory and practice are different worlds. I pursued individual psychotherapy, which led to a general sense of improvement. Now, however, I find myself feeling uncertain—these life patterns are emerging where I feel like a complete novice, and these issues feel like such heavy obstacles. Naturally, your self-confidence takes a hit during times like this. No matter how much logic I apply or how aware I am of the situation, I can't predict how I'll actually react. I don't think anyone truly can—though perhaps someone else here has walked a similar path?

I've never been one to chase money or status, yet I find myself in this paradoxical spot. It feels like all or nothing. My options aren't exactly endless, and the best one has presented itself as the only one.

And yes, it would be a career and a field of study that has always sparked my intellectual curiosity.

I’ve been talking about this for days with a few friends—people who haven't dealt with mental health struggles and can't quite grasp what I'm going through right now. That’s why I’m turning to you all; I’m hoping for some constructive advice, and maybe—if I’m being honest—just a little bit of support.

For those who missed my previous posts here, here is the situation: about two years ago, I went through a psychotic episode. I was on heavy medication at first, then gradually tapered down until I reached a somewhat stable state. However, alongside that past episode, I developed generalized anxiety disorder, which—it feels to me—is actually causing more damage.

Right now, I find myself in a really difficult chapter of my life. The psychosis hit shortly after I graduated from college. During my studies, there were so many opportunities on the table—everything from grad school scholarships to high-level career paths. In short, a real career was within reach. But the psychosis stalled everything. My father—who has always been incredibly supportive and was planning to help me financially so I could build a solid foundation for my career—was understanding about it all. He even found me a job, though I specifically asked for something with very light professional demands and reduced hours. I had already essentially written off my career prospects, just trying to scrape by because of the cognitive deficits I was feeling. It’s been like this for several years.

After work, I just lie in bed. I don't really have hobbies; I occasionally see someone, but my emotions feel totally numbed out. I spend my time idling and making vague plans for some distant future when "everything finally falls into place." Essentially, I'm just stuck. A few months ago, I started having these recurring dreams about getting older—about life passing me by while I remain completely stationary. Those dreams were the breaking point; I'm starting to feel this internal drive to move, especially since I've been living in chronic poverty and total hopelessness.

I've been speaking with my psychiatrist, who encourages me by saying I'm intellectually very strong, and my boss, who told me he’s "finally glad to see me snap out of it and stop wasting my talent." Suddenly, overnight, I’m starting to receive offers that most people would kill for—opportunities they’ve spent years working toward. They’re practically being served to me on a silver platter because I made such a great impression during my time in school and early work. The problem is, I feel like I don't even have the strength to pick up the plate.

I am being offered a great job along with a scholarship for further education. Ever since the offer came in, I haven't been able to sleep properly. The moment I heard the news, my ears felt clogged, my thoughts turned into complete chaos, and my concentration plummeted to the point where I can barely read a few sentences. It feels like my own body is sabotaging itself, and I honestly don't know what to do.

I'm glad that I'm finally motivated and that I actually *want* to get out of bed, but I’m haunted by massive questions: CAN I ACTUALLY HANDLE THESE NEW AND SERIOUS CHALLENGES, AND WILL I DESTROY MY HEALTH BY TRYING?

I'm paralyzed. I'm being handed opportunities that any "normal" person would grab in a heartbeat, but I'm not normal. I'm struggling with intense anxiety.

People tell me that, in the end, I have nothing to lose—that I should just go for it because they don't see any "glitch" in me that would hold me back. But I feel that glitch deep inside. I am terrified of failing and of letting these opportunities slip away.

Does anyone have any advice? I'll take anything. Are there any general trends or statistics regarding people with psychological struggles when it comes to handling complex tasks and advanced learning?

Ever since this career wind was blown in my direction, I've lost all sense of time. I'm completely frazzled, spiraling through hundreds of different scenarios in my head—some of them truly irrational. What should I do?

HELP!

For the professionals: I'm currently taking 1x 150 mg Quetiapine SR, 2x 0.5 Klonopin, and 1x 75 mg Pregabalin.

Thomas Price12 said:No, I'm fully aware this isn't going to heal on its own, which is exactly why I'm feeling so desperate. I've been trying to talk them into seeing a psychiatrist and taking their meds for two weeks now. I even tried sneaking medication into their drink just hoping maybe something would click and they'd snap out of it, but nothing works... talking just doesn't help at all.
When they were hospitalized, I asked the doctor about those injections, but they said it wasn't the right move for him. I have no idea why... just oral medications for now...

Maybe reach out to his primary care physician for some guidance? This is such a critical situation. Honestly, wouldn't it be better to have him hospitalized by force rather than letting this psychotic state take a deeper hold on his brain?

Thomas Price12 said:Hey everyone,
A close loved one was hospitalized back in October, and after about a month, they were finally discharged with a prescription. Everything seemed to be going great at first—the meds pretty much wiped out all the symptoms (we're talking paranoia, auditory hallucinations, feeling like people are plotting against them, or thinking someone is breaking into the house when nobody is there, etc.). But over the last month, they've been stopping the medication, and now all those symptoms are rushing right back. They’re flat-out refusing to take anything now. They won't really say why they stopped, but from what I can gather, they just feel "happier" without them, or maybe they felt too drowsy and unmotivated while on them. I've tried talking, but nothing seems to work. They're convinced everyone is out to get them... honestly, I'm lost. What should I do? How can I help convince them to get back on their meds? If this keeps up, they're going to lose their job—they don't even want to take medical leave, they just want to quit because they think they're fine and everyone at work is just being shady. Does anyone know if there's any way to reach someone in this state and get them to start their treatment again???

Besides the oral medications, is he receiving any injections?

Try any way you can to get that person to see a psychiatrist so they can administer an injection—that way, the choice isn't left up to him. You absolutely have to go to a doctor, because a psychotic disorder won't just resolve itself; if anything, things will only escalate.

Carl Rivera43 said:How was your sleep lately? Do you ever get those weirdly familiar dreams where some old, distant dream just keeps looping back in similar ways?

I have to admit—not really. Since the psychosis, I feel fundamentally altered. I’m almost a stranger to myself now—as are these new dreams.

Maria Price3 said:It’s hardly surprising you're having those kinds of dreams. It’s exhausting when you realize something isn't quite right—but without any answers—and it just starts weighing on you.

Could this be tied to stopping your antipsychotics? Maybe you're worried about "losing control"—as if the meds provided this safety net against losing your grip on reality—and now that they're gone, you feel like you're walking on thin ice? That uncertainty is brutal. Honestly, those dreams make perfect sense given the circumstances.
When anxiety hits, even basic math feels impossible.
I think most people experience those sensations right before drifting off to sleep—they probably just don't notice because they aren't as preoccupied with sleep and dreaming as you are.

That is a very real possibility. While I was on antipsychotics, I felt terrible—everything felt slowed down, and I struggled with feeling disconnected from myself and my surroundings. I’d walk out onto the street and immediately forget why I even left the house. Or I'd find myself constantly checking my pockets every few minutes just to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything. It was a mess. I blamed everything on the side effects and found myself stuck in this loop: 1. I can't wait to get off these meds so I can actually function again, but 2. I'm terrified to stop because I don't want to lose touch with reality. There's this massive fear regarding schizophrenia, especially knowing the statistics—that once someone experiences a psychotic episode, there's a 96-97% chance of another one. Every time I saw my psychiatrist, the first thing I’d ask was whether I had schizophrenia. A few of them would tell me that maybe/perhaps I fall into that tiny percentage of people who only have a single episode, but they could never truly guarantee it.

Plus, there's that added layer of existential dread and worrying about the future—it just feeds into the anxiety and the fear that you might "go crazy," which then creates this endless cycle.

Why am I so afraid of schizophrenia? Because I know exactly how much it tanks your ability to function. And frankly, I don't have the luxury of being non-functional—I don't have the time, and I can't accept it. Between the family issues and looking after my mother, who moved in with me after leaving my father, things are intense. We're facing serious financial struggles, and I need to get my act together, fast. I barely have the bandwidth to deal with my own mental health or seek therapy, though I've realized that's absolutely essential right now. Everywhere I look, it's just a struggle.

I went through something similar—I thought I was losing my mind because I knew something was wrong, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I had a dream where an old woman approached me on the street and said, "Oh, you look so pale; all the crazy people are pale." In the dream, I just told her, "I'll put on some blush." The next day, I ended up at the psychiatric ER telling the doctor on duty that I thought I was losing it, explaining everything that was happening, including that dream. She was kind and told me I wasn't going crazy. At the time, that was enough. I eventually received official diagnoses later on (though I still have my doubts sometimes), but simply having someone tell me what was happening—even if it took years to figure out—finally gave me some peace of mind.

I don't have much to add—though what they told you is solid advice—but I’d suggest shifting your focus entirely. It sounds easier said than done, right? But if you spend all your energy obsessing over whether you're losing it or just waiting for the breakdown to happen, you're practically inviting it. If you act like you're the most mentally stable person on the planet while constantly bracing for impact, wouldn't you eventually crack?
You aren't losing it—you're just overthinking things—and honestly, isn't that the sign of a sound mind? If you were actually losing your grip, you wouldn't even be worried about whether you were or not. I truly believe you won't "go crazy"—at least, not entirely.

Those dreams—those self-imposed mental labyrinths we wander through—it feels a bit like shooting yourself in the foot, doesn't it? Except, despite all the chaos, I can't seem to find the exit.

The psychotherapist started grilling me about job opportunities right out of the gate—which felt a bit odd, wouldn't you say? I ended up pointing out my own anxiety, the jitters, and that restless physical tension I was feeling. I actually asked her: if this is how I show up during therapy, how am I ever supposed to land a high-stakes role where showing any sign of weakness is strictly off-limits? Her only response? A simple, "I understand."

Thanks for getting back to me. It really means a lot to see that others have gone through—or are going through—the exact same struggles; it definitely gives me a bit of hope. Anyway, keep your fingers crossed for me—I'm trying my best not to lose my mind!