Posts by Terry Davis40

she really doesn't care about you 🤣

Jacob Foster11 said:Maybe just include a menu with maybe 10 different skins—including this one as the default—so everyone can just pick whatever they actually like.

Seems like a good idea, I guess. 👍

I'm with you on this one—not that it changes much.

Sorry, I don't think I follow what you mean. So, if I report a post filled with nasty personal insults and call them "vile," you won't take action just because I used the "wrong" description for the rule violation?

Your point is pretty unclear to me—not to mention how you're trying to link two totally different things (especially since you weren't even involved in the situation mentioned in the thread title): the issue of mismanagement in US hospitals versus my reporting of the bickering in the "overwhelmed grandparents" thread. You labeled my report as unfounded, yet somehow, someone still went ahead and deleted the exact bickering I flagged.

Anyway, thanks for your time and attention. I'm perfectly fine with the solution hollowtrucker77 offered me, so I guess you wasted your breath trying to paint me as some person who bothers moderators with baseless reports. It seems others agree with me—including some of your own colleagues, who actually removed those "vile" posts I reported. It’s honestly a bit tragic that when I flag a post where the author is insulting someone and saying things like "your pizza is perfectly narrow," you tell me there’s no ground for deletion.
Is that what passes for an "articulate forum debate"? She didn't just break the rules; she chewed them up and spat them out, and you basically gave her a standing ovation by supporting that behavior.

That's all from me.

I’m talking about the posts I flagged today in a thread I wasn't even part of—I was just reporting harassment and trolling. You told me there was nothing wrong with them and even threatened to put me on a timeout if I didn't stop reporting stuff. Then, a little while later, those exact posts were deleted. So... they clearly violated the rules. Besides, I wasn't even participating in that discussion, let alone trolling anyone.

It might have been helpful if you actually looked into the details before jumping to conclusions.

And I should probably mention this too: in that thread about the lack of staff at Mayo Clinic hospitals, there was plenty of insults flying around—and the one I reported was actually aimed right at me (to paraphrase: you're such a hypocrite, just go die).

Go ahead, just give me the ban I clearly deserve.
It seems more productive to just paste posts here instead of reporting them—maybe then we’ll get a somewhat objective take on what actually counts as "harassment." From what I can see, the posts I reported were deleted specifically because they violated subforum rules (even though you told me there was no basis for removing them):

• spam, trolling, and harassing others for any reason, turning the discussion toward the user rather than the topic, and using slurs is prohibited and will be removed without warning; repeating deleted content or ignoring warnings may result in being barred from the subforum. We want this subforum to be a space for reasoned debate, so please refrain from unconstructive or insulting posts.

This is all stuff that gets tolerated in many threads on Reddit or parenting forums. I didn't see anything in the rules stating that filing a report is grounds for a ban, which is what you threatened me with. It's funny how, by your logic, that's bannable, yet "personal attacks" or "targeting the user" aren't treated with the same weight. That was the issue with the formula milk example—since the comment was posted in a thread about "wanting a baby," it was basically just one user insulting another, and the comment had nothing to do with the actual topic. I guess she’s entitled to her opinion, just maybe not in this space.

On topic: every single discussion about breastfeeding turns into an attack on mothers who don't breastfeed. Because of that, women who don't nurse their kids have pretty much stopped showing up, since certain users seem to hang around just to lecture them about their "immorality." My only theory is that someone is intentionally allowing this, probably because they share the views of the people who aren't being sanctioned—it feels like the moderation is pretty subjective.

If you actually enforced the rules properly, most discussions here wouldn't look like a playground brawl.

thanks.

I didn't say it wasn't moderated—just that maybe, if you ever find a spare moment, you could actually look into this thread. Up until now, the mods have seemed pretty tolerant regarding off-topic chatter and people aggressively questioning the values of teenagers—mostly just minimal, necessary warnings here and there. I reported some posts last night, and yeah, they were wiped today. But as far as I can tell, that one user who was straight-up insulting everyone—DOA—hasn't faced any actual consequences.
It’s a shame the posts were just deleted, since I can't even link to the insults now.

I honestly wish I could share the link—that whole back-and-forth argument I mentioned happened last night, but the moderators wiped it all clean this morning.

I’m also wondering why insults like "you raised a kid on nothing but antidepressants," "that poor child caught in your claws," or "just drop dead" are actually tolerated here... On other subreddits, people get banned for that kind of filth—but here, at best, they just get deleted.

This thread is located in the pregnancy subforum. Off-topic comments and insults directed at moms who don't breastfeed are apparently allowed here.

I’d appreciate it if a moderator could explain why this is being tolerated.
Breastfeeding seems to be a massive flashpoint in so many threads—it makes me wonder why people are just allowed to jump in and insult women who choose not to breastfeed, offering their unsolicited opinions (which usually involve plenty of insults).
Beyond the fact that their input is totally irrelevant to the topic, the way these users speak to one another is honestly embarrassing.
And yet, none of this seems to result in any actual moderation or penalties.

I'm looking for an explanation.

Thanks.

So I finally got a reply to my DM. He basically said he isn't deleting those moderator posts because—in his opinion—it’s not necessary. If you have an issue with what he’s doing, I guess you just have to take it up with him directly. It’s a bit ridiculous, really—but whatever.

He didn't even comment on my chat.

And honestly, maybe I'll end up getting banned for sharing what was said in a private message—who knows.🤷
It's probably not worth getting worked up over when nothing is going to change anyway. It’s just the usual crowd chatting away. 🤣

What do you think—should we kick this thread off? 😁

Michelle Wilson8 said:I just wanted to take a second to say how much I appreciate everyone who stepped up to support this fight🙂
And honestly, my thanks go out to those who didn't show up for me too👎
A huge shoutout to the moderators for everything they do👍
And hey, thanks to all the agitators and troublemakers as well🤣
(seriously, lord, I told you "watch and learn"😍)

Don't mention it. I can only promise to keep sharing my honest take on the topics I cover—and to back the fights I actually believe are worth the energy. Maybe.

Jesse Taylor80, you really aren't a balanced person—and honestly, you're being rude beyond measure.

As far as swallowing crap goes, maybe try sweeping your own porch first.

Benjamin Sullivan6, you legend! 🙂 they actually brought you back!😘>

I get why you're annoyed that the threads aren't as visible anymore—but honestly, I’m loving the moderators here way more than those folks over at ZUD. Plus, some of the new handles are great. I wouldn't bother heading back to ZUD anyway. rowdyfox12 is awesome😍,😁 Kyle King4 is too, and Michelle Alvarez8 is sharp and intuitive—they're a pretty interesting bunch. It feels much more fun and relaxed down here.

Maybe the mods in ZUD could just drop some links to the chats so we can all hang out in the basement. The crowd here is just better👍

In a closed thread titled Request, Štemajzl wrote:

Well, since I have to remind the local crowd every few pages anyway, I might as well chew this over here too.
The 'mother-in-law' section isn't a dedicated chat room—and those topics aren't some private, gated support group just for daughters-in-law.

Every few months, we have to drop these warnings for users who lose it whenever they encounter anything other than mindless validation and coddling. Some people just need a warning post, others need their comments deleted, and for some, even a ban doesn't work. Different strokes for different folks, I guess...

This response has nothing to do with why the Request thread was opened in the first place.

Since the topic is closed and he ignored my question, I’d like to know what the objective standard for "chat" is—and why his chatty posts in that controversial thread aren't being wiped out?

Also, I reported his insulting comment about how "mothers know exactly what kind of snakes they raised," and nobody did anything. I’m asking for an explanation as to why that kind of harassment is allowed.

Thanks.

That’s about right.
There aren't really any rules—nobody answers questions in this section of the forum much anyway—and they often let those nasty comments about "the daughters-in-law" slide under the guise of "just chatting." It all gets tolerated, I guess.

I don't see things changing around here anytime soon.

Since the moderator isn't responding anymore, maybe the admins could weigh in—does this comment count as being off-topic in the chat, and should it be deleted under the same rules?

I guess this whole situation is just unclear to me, unfortunately.

Can you explain how you decide what counts as chat?
If I write two sentences about a topic, it’s considered chat and gets deleted—but if I write ten, does it suddenly fall into some other category and become allowed?

I’m not really sure who I was actually chatting with in that last post you deleted—the one where I was just continuing the story about lunch at my mother-in-law's.
What exactly made that chat?