Posts by Olivia Carter25

I can't believe this is happening at the ICC right now. If these allegations are true, it's a massive blow to the credibility of the whole institution. Do you guys think this will actually impact the international cases they're currently working on?

Source: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cqjxddx12qqo?at_medium=RSS&at_campaign=rss

labellina said:Attractive kids just get more affection😍
from the moment they're born..

Is it actual love, or just narcissism reflected back at them? 😛 😬

Here’s my take, though it’s a bit of a different angle 🙂

I actually think being attractive doesn't make life easier—especially for women. In fact, I’d argue it makes things harder for beautiful women. A lot of them end up developing this deep-seated narcissism because they’re constantly pressured to be flawless, to look perfect at all times, which just creates more baggage as the years go by. Then there's the whole "bimbo" stereotype where people assume if you're pretty, you must be brainless; frankly, most people don't even bother looking past the surface level 😉. Over time, that just breeds all sorts of insecurities because their value is tied solely to their looks. Sure, handsome guys might turn into narcissists too—and yeah, they'll probably have an easier time socially since they'll always have someone interested in them—but even that isn't a guarantee.

Granted, being good-looking gives you a massive leg up in Hollywood or whatever the media industry is pushing right now. Someone with an average look might never land a prime-time hosting gig on NBC (though let's be honest, what percentage of "beautiful people" actually make it into those high-profile showbiz roles anyway?), but they'll likely climb the corporate ladder at a place like Goldman Sachs much faster without ever having to sleep their way to the top. 😉

So, the whole thing isn't really black and white. 😛

Olivia Carter25 said:exactly what I was thinking...

For me, the absolute worst part is being at a coffee shop and having some waiter spill scalding hot coffee right in my lap. In that moment, all I can think is, "Man, if we were back on the forum, I'd be tearing you a new one," but instead, I just sit there in silence like a total pushover. What am I even supposed to do?

Yeah, I remember this hilarious little video on YouTube that perfectly captured the massive gap between life online and reality. It showed people having these polite, civilized political debates in person—everyone acting so incredibly tolerant and kind. You know the drill: "I disagree with your stance, but I respect your right to hold it," or "I'm not a fan of the Republicans, but I believe in free speech." Then, you look at the exact same group of people on the internet, and it’s a complete bloodbath. It's just pure vitriol: "You motherf***er, all Republicans should drop dead! Your entire worldview is garbage!" Just constant, unhinged outbursts. 🤣
Sadly, they pulled the video from YouTube 😢 (http://www.youtube.com/index?&sessio...VzcQhdcQl1Lg==)

Crax GP said:Same here, seriously, sameeeee 🙏 🙏 🙏

It’s such a gross feeling. Honestly, I can barely express myself in writing anymore without reaching for those damn emojis. It’s funny because it feels like everyone has just started leaning into it, so I just throw a little vibe in parentheses like :fuckinghell: 😲 😬

lol, yeah, me neither. Even when I'm grinding out a college term paper or drafting formal emails at work, I get this urge to slap an emoji in there—acting all pathetic with a "unfortunately, I didn't make the deadline" or adding a little smirk next to a snarky comment in a research paper 🤣 lol, it's UNBELIEVABLE.

🤣 The internet is pure EVIL.

The absolute worst part is when I’m just sitting there having coffee and I catch myself thinking, "Man, I really wish I could just drop that one specific Reddit gold reaction—the guy slamming his hand on the floor while he loses it laughing." 😂 That’s the exact moment you realize you’re officially hooked. 😲

Rebecca Sharp said:how can someone be kind to everyone, constantly chasing after everyone's approval, while just laughing off any insults thrown their way?

It sounds perfect on paper... but...

I don't think I could ever live like that.

People like that eventually end up like those troubled kids you see in the news here in the USA; one day everything just snaps, they grab a weapon, and they cause absolute chaos.

Bradley Cooper said:you aren't alone. it feels to me like this specific psychological state has become some kind of mainstream phenomenon in modern society. unfortunately...
and what can I tell you, coming from someone who spent most of their life overthinking everything—pardon the expression—to the point where I’ve reached a stage where I can relativize absolutely everything.
everything.
because if I start relativizing the very concept of existence (which I do quite often), then how much importance do people, emotions, the world, lofty and noble goals, various theories, and all those things people use to build their dreams—and more often than not, their entire lives—really hold?
a person needs some sort of goal in life. that seems obvious enough. it's just... one day I'll set a goal for myself, only to tear it to shreds the next day, because I am capable of dissecting anything with analytical surgery. my value system fluctuates on a daily basis. ethics, morality, you name it...
education? honestly, I finished my schooling for the sake of others, I can admit that now. not because anyone forced me, but because I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life, and education is just a nicely packaged, legal way to mask your own insecurities. kudos to those who always knew what they wanted and marched down that path without wavering. "for others," because it's considered "good" to graduate college and have a degree. it brings "security" later in life. "later"??? and that's where the relativization kicks in... we take time for granted. time is treated as something certain, something we don't bother thinking about. it's normal to ask a kid in preschool, "what do you want to be when you grow up?" growing up is treated as a certainty. why? because a child isn't going to get hit by a car? or die from sudden sepsis? or get caught in the crossfire of a stray bullet from some drunk passerby celebrating a win for the local football team with an illegal handgun? etc...
nobody, absolutely nobody, ever tells us in life, "hey, nothing in life is certain. enjoy what you have right now. this exact moment. this sunset. this warmth. this breeze carrying the scent of wildflowers. this sand tickling your feet as you walk. the softness of the hand you're holding. the infinite depth in the eyes of the girl walking beside you." nobody tells you that. everyone is looking forward, like horses harnessed to a plow, toward the day they graduate. meet the love of their life. get married. have kids. get a dog. buy a house on the outskirts of a suburb near a small river and a forest. until they solve a mid-life crisis by buying a new Porsche, or until they try to become the next Michael Jordan, LeBron James, or Michael Schumacher and live off the fame and envy of others. they are all just dreams. and we spend too much of our lives dreaming instead of walking with our eyes wide open.
and yet, when I look at a human being as a creature dependent on just a few senses... what are we? what is real? what actually matters?
is that sunset, that breeze, that scent just a "response" from our brains to external stimuli? is my excitement while holding a girl's hand just an extension of an uncontrolled instinct to propagate the species? and how can you not think that we are nothing more than mere puppets being manipulated by someone or something... all while we fail to understand it, yet remain perfectly capable of "explaining" it away just so we can maintain a clean conscience and move through another day, and another, and another...
and the society around us... it's a damn machine that has outgrown us all, and we don't even notice. we are just cogs. disposable. replaceable. and all of it is so exhausting that I'm slowly losing my will.
I lie in bed, turn off the lights, put on some music, low, and slide into another restless night.

so... you aren't alone.

You remind me of myself from two years ago.😁

Whether we’re just cogs in the machine or not really comes down to how you look at things. But there’s something else in what you wrote that I want to dig into—it’s the same dilemma, really. You mentioned you only went through school because everyone else told you that’s what you were supposed to do. So, let me ask you: what would you actually *do*? What’s your actual passion? What makes you genuinely happy, or what kind of work gets you so deeply immersed that you completely lose track of time? Is there anything like that for you?

shadowfox75 said:I definitely need to start a new thread because the masses clearly don't give a damn about this one... just you few here.
I'm drowning in depressing topics and I have enough material to crash this whole PSYCH forum, I just don't know where to even begin...

😳

It’s not that they aren't interested; we just missed the thread. Use your eyes. 😬 What are we going to do, fall into a coma? It's not like any of us haven't dealt with these issues before. :P

So many people are dealing with the exact same struggles you all described. I’m right there with you—this is all happening because of the massive societal shifts we've seen lately. Our lifestyles have changed so drastically, and our brains just haven't caught up because nobody ever prepared us for this. We were raised by "old school" parents who taught us how to function in a completely different era, and then we woke up in a world that bears no resemblance to the one we were trained for.

Following that logic, and echoing what someone else already pointed out here: meaning can only be found within yourself. That is the only place it exists. That doesn't mean you need to sit at home meditating for ten hours a day; it just means that once you find that internal sense of purpose, the world starts looking a lot brighter and more coherent, and you stop exhausting yourself with these existential questions. 😁 Basically, you have to start inward and ask yourself—where did that sense of purpose go? Where did it vanish to, and what exactly is standing in your way from feeling it again?

What parts of your life actually work for you, and what parts feel broken? Are you doing things you actually enjoy? When was the last time you actually paused, looked around, and really noticed the people standing right next to you?

Kyle Morris7 said:Who exactly is making that claim? Theology and basically every religion out there argue the complete opposite. Most people consider themselves believers, which implies that the vast majority share that mindset, at least on a surface level.

That’s precisely where psychology and religion diverge.😉 Besides, you were just lecturing me moments ago about how the masses are rarely right, and now suddenly you're claiming they are. Pick a side.😬>

Gerald Rivera60 said:Every scientific discipline strives for value neutrality... and concepts like good and evil fall squarely into that category.

Furthermore, the definitions of good and evil lack clarity; they aren't clearly defined and simply can't be operationalized in any meaningful way.

Exactly. In my view, that’s the fundamental flaw within psychology—it struggles immensely with operationalization. It's constantly trying to quantify things that are, by their very nature, impossible to fully measure.

That said, I agree that terms like "good" and "evil" have no business being used in psychological discourse...

Gerald Rivera60 said:Trying to push psychology into the realm of the non-material goes against its very definition as a science (though I know people will argue about that—the reality is that most psychologists view their field as a natural science).

Exactly. It makes me wonder why on earth a natural science would even be housed within a liberal arts college.😁 😛

Kyle Morris7 said:I’m not overstepping here. We’re talking about mass pathology, which falls squarely under psychiatry. If it isn't a clinical pathology, then we're just looking at pure evil—and evil is a fundamental part of human nature, much like any other social behavior.
But let’s circle back to my original point. I was waiting for someone to bring up egoism—specifically, that total lack of human solidarity—as the driving force behind why crowds idolize criminals. A mob will worship a villain as long as things are going their way, and they couldn't care less if others suffer in the process. In my experience, that’s actually the primary driver behind what looks like irrational hero-worship of bad actors. When people talk about this, the most common refrain is, "As long as I'm doing fine, I don't care about anyone else's problems." Honestly, I’d go as far as to say that's how most people operate.
The problem is that psychiatry doesn't classify egoism as a pathology, though frankly, it probably should be.

You're mixing apples and oranges. You can't claim a lack of solidarity is the direct cause of a crowd gravitating toward a criminal authority figure. It might be one contributing factor—though people aren't nearly that simple, and I don't agree with your premise anyway, but I won't get bogged down in that specific debate right now.

Maybe if you actually wanted to debate this, you should have started a new thread specifically for "egoism"? Just tell us, what is it that’s actually bothering you? 😁

Kyle Morris7 said:People will cheer for a villain in a heartbeat as long as they're getting a good deal, completely ignoring the collateral damage left in their wake.

This is a beautiful (and perfectly logical) scientific definition 🤣 🙄

Kyle Morris7 said:My German isn't great, unfortunately, so I can't really weigh in. Honestly, this kind of theory is hard for me to wrap my head around because I have a hard time respecting authority myself; once an authority figure lets me down, I walk away immediately. But when it comes to a frenzied or malicious mob, they seem to never abandon their leader. I’m thinking about people who still cling to leaders from fifty years ago, even when it's blatantly obvious those authorities were toxic.
It just occurred to me what I was getting at in my last sentence. Maybe the key to explaining mass insanity is that they never leave their chosen authority. The real question is why they refuse to let go and instead choose to stay trapped in their own madness?

That isn't quite right, though, since you won't find many people in Germany today who will admit to having participated in Nazi activities, nor will you find anyone admitting their elders did, even in towns where almost everyone was involved. They distanced themselves from that authority very effectively once the political winds shifted...😉

I agree with Walter Myers4; I think Nazism was a result of collective repression... And I agree with Nellie—ignoring the shadow is essentially the same thing. Then there's what Walter Myers4 mentioned regarding the consequences of restrictive Protestant upbringing... That repressed aggression had to go somewhere. Americans simply projected their own shadows onto the Jews. That’s where all those schemes came from—claiming Jews were "unclean" while the Aryan race was "pure." If that isn't repression, I don't know what is.

Diana said:I don't know, I just feel like I've been living in this total illusion my whole life. I used to blame everyone else for everything that happened to me; I was basically stuck in neutral until something inside me finally snapped (and honestly, I'm still in that phase). I just decided to let things change—to let the parts of myself that were already dead finally die, even though I'd been refusing to accept it for ages. What Olivia Carter25 is saying is spot on; you start drifting away from people. I've become pretty isolated because the way I see everyone has shifted, and I'll probably stay that way until I find some kind of balance between my perceptions and actual reality. My "self-work" involves critical thinking, respecting subjective views while prioritizing objective truth, observing people, watching how I react in certain situations, having internal dialogues with my inner Diana, playing out imaginary conversations with others, journaling my dreams, talking to dream characters, meditating, and working out. All in all, even though my head feels like it's exploding and half of my old world has crumbled or is currently in pieces, I feel more alive than ever before.

Man, I went through the exact same thing. I just couldn't bring myself to let go of everything that should have been buried years ago. To be honest, there are still a few things I'm clinging to, but most of it is gone. And let me tell you, once you finally let it go, it’s like you can actually breathe again. 😉

Look, for someone who claims they hate bickering, I have to say you sure do love a good argument. Though, I suppose there might be some sort of altruistic motive driving all this 🤣

As for the resident know-it-all, here’s a little psychological riddle just for you 😁. But honestly, I’m sure you covered this in your grad school courses—if you’re constantly attacking "us know-it-alls," there must be something about us that deeply attracts you. Hmm, I wonder what that could be? 😉

Anyway, we aren't going to see eye-to-eye anytime soon. To wrap this up—like I said before, it isn't hard to figure out why I push back. I will always react to people who try to cram the human soul into the tiny, cramped confines of a little box. Unfortunately, it seems to me you're missing a vital piece of the puzzle. I also react to those who use their professional titles as a shield to claim they are the sole authority on a subject, spreading misinformation about things that I believe are essential for people to truly understand.

I view the human soul and its mental states in a completely different way than you do. To me, a "patient" isn't just a clinical case; they are a human being. I don't think you can draw conclusions as a therapist the way you do. In my view, there is absolutely no place for moral judgment in psychotherapy, and frankly, it really bothers me when therapists act like that—something I've noticed from you multiple times. (I could go into detail about where and how, but I really don't feel like wasting any more energy on this debate.) I see a therapist as someone meant to heal the human soul, not lecture people or force them to conform to society. Furthermore, I see a therapist as someone who has walked a similar path themselves, not some narcissistic God sitting on a throne looking down on a patient. I detest that attitude within the profession, and you embody it more than enough. I'm sure that contributes to my "resistance toward the therapist," but maybe we should ask ourselves what caused your "countertransference" and why you never mention that 😛

And please, keep acting like you know more than me; you can keep trying to prove it through your posts until you've hung three or four diplomas on your wall.

All of this is exactly why I find myself countering you. But actually, I'm starting to doubt if these debates even serve a purpose beyond obvious bickering. The psychological approach you advocate for and psychoanalysis have never really shared much common ground anyway, and it's clear we aren't on the same wavelength.

So, that's all from me. I'll catch you on another thread.

Carol Lee4 said:I am truly sorry if you interpreted anything I said as being "driven by personal provocations." I was away for a while, so I’m not entirely sure what you’re referring to.
Regarding therapy—on an individual level, I lean toward Gestalt and cognitive behavioral therapy. For group work, I utilize psychodrama.
Of course, different modalities overlap; it isn't as strictly compartmentalized as my summary might suggest. I frequently incorporate various other methods—ranging from autogenic training to diaphragmatic breathing. Some of these might still be considered "exotic" in our field, but I often borrow techniques from Buddhism, yoga, and Reiki... etc.
Every therapeutic approach I take is unique. I try to collaborate with the client to select the most accessible method where we believe progress can be made quickly. The one cornerstone of classical therapy I refuse to compromise on is the "here and now"—I insist on that, so the client can recognize the core of their problem and take responsibility for certain things (though, again, not everything, I should clarify).

Look, my view is that for someone to actually be present in the "here and now," they first have to resolve everything preventing them from doing so. You aren't going to achieve that just by treating the symptoms; you have to address the root causes that led to those consequences in the first place.
That is why I am a proponent of psychoanalysis; I find it far more effective than cognitive-behavioral approaches. But ultimately, a lot of it comes down to the therapist.

What offends me in our communication is the terminology you use—calling my discussion technique pathetic. You're treating one specific therapeutic direction as if it were the only valid one simply because you assume that's what I use.
I don't understand this line of reasoning directed at me personally rather than my professional practice. You can't possibly know which specific methods I employ, and I tend to be quite general in my responses because, as I stated at the start, my goal isn't to lecture people on specific methodologies. My goal is to encourage people who feel they need help to seek it without shame, prejudice, or fear of judgment.

No, I simply meant it is pathetic when you start making assumptions about what I've read—using such a condescending tone, no less—when you actually know nothing about it, purely because you disagree with my arguments and can't seem to find a solid rebuttal. I stand by my point: it is pathetic. 😛
Furthermore, this is also what bothers me about debating you—I notice that whenever an argument doesn't suit you, you immediately turn it into a personal attack. Suddenly, everyone has "resistance to the therapist," or we aren't educated enough, or we have "stupid" explanations. That isn't actual counter-argumentation.
I don't care for people who use their profession and "altruism" as an excuse to look down on others. This is a forum, not your private office; there is no reason to treat any of us like your clients. If I decided to play that game, I could easily start psychoanalyzing your posts, and I doubt you'd enjoy that very much.

Any type of professional help can be useful, and a person will eventually find the right therapy or the right provider... The key is just to start, to take action, and to reach out for help. Personally, I don't care which specific therapy is used, as long as it works!
I will always be prepared to clearly and logically, and quite loudly among my peers, argue against the outdated methods of long-term psychoanalysis—which proved ineffective for specific issues over twenty years ago—and the cozy relationship between psychiatry and Big Pharma!!!
I know this from the inside, and it isn’t just an issue here in America, though the problem is migrating from the West toward Eastern nations.
Every single day—and I mean truly every day—in places like Germany, there are multiple instances where kickbacks are offered, involving massive sums of money, if a doctor prescribes specific medications from certain pharmaceutical companies.
I know this is happening here too, and based on conversations with colleagues—ranging from primary care physicians upward—this phenomenon is slowly reaching epidemic proportions.
I am going to fight this as long as I have a single ounce of strength left, because I find it absolutely unethical and immoral... I'm running out of ways to describe this trend, especially since, over the last 15 years or so, this "phenomenon" has been moving toward developing nations. It makes sense; specialists in those countries are paid significantly less than their Western counterparts.
Best regards🙂

Regarding the pharmaceutical industry, I'm right there with you. As for everything else, I will also continue to fight against such a narrow, limited view of the human psyche. 😉

Nobody is claiming she was ever in a healthy situation to begin with. But let's be real, there was already a foundation laid for her to develop narcissistic personality disorder.

Actually, NPD is an incredibly common occurrence among victims of abuse—it's one of those frequent defense mechanisms. No one is saying she’s acting this way just because she's "evil"; rather, this behavior is a survival tactic. When a child realizes that the only way to survive their environment—in this case, an abuser—is to adapt to their demands through manipulation, they do it just to stay afloat. Over time, especially if the trauma persists, the child learns to function this way and develops a false persona. It’s a mask designed to manipulate the surroundings and cater to what people want to see just to earn affection. Eventually, the person practically forgets that beneath this facade lies a true self filled with so much pain and trauma that its very existence has been completely denied. That mechanism sticks around even after they escape that environment, and that's what we call narcissistic personality disorder.
From the outside, these individuals look perfectly fine. They can even be wildly successful and project an image of being incredibly strong (take Tom Cruise, for example, who dealt with an abusive father during his childhood). But behind that defensive shield is someone incapable of managing basic aspects of a normal life—like healthy human relationships (since they'll likely fall back into old patterns just to feel loved, making it nearly impossible for their true self to surface) or genuine fulfillment (because even if they achieve worldly success, they're hollowed out by an internal emptiness that eats them alive). I won't go on listing every single symptom.

Now, I don't know if she was already like this before, or if that guy specifically broke her, or any of the three hundred other details that are pointless to dive into since we can't verify them anymore. All I'm saying is that she is clearly not mentally sound, and you can't take everything she says at face value. What we saw in that interview was definitely Nataschin Lazni ja, because the real her wouldn't use that logic—claiming her parents were good when everything points to the contrary (which might actually show she's still stuck at the emotional level of a ten-year-old). Then there's the fact that she defends her kidnapper (is that Stockholm Syndrome or just a performance for the public?), her various excuses for avoiding her parents (there are surely real reasons why she won't see them), and how she immediately follows up one sentence with another just to please the audience—like when she mentioned wanting to party, then quickly added, "but nothing wild, no alcohol or drugs," as if trying to protect her "good girl" image.

At the end of the day, whatever game she's playing, she's playing it because she doesn't know any other way to exist. Regardless of the narrative, it's obvious she had every reason to become this way, and the only real solution now is intensive therapy. Even though recovery is difficult under normal circumstances, given these specific horrors, it's going to be brutal. For both the psychiatrists and for her.

Harold Adams5 said:Same here. It’s not really her story anymore; it’s become this narrative crafted by psychiatrists and psychologists—a "standardized" understanding of what kidnapping should feel like. That’s why we hear all these contradictions and why people refuse to let Natasha speak for herself.
She describes her emotions based on how THEY (and by extension, we) assume living in captivity must feel. They’ve essentially shoved feelings into her that she didn't even know existed—all these intense reactions tied to humiliation, agony, and claustrophobia. But reality was likely different: after the initial shock, she probably just surrendered to the situation, accepted what was happening, and processed it with a level of calmness that most of us couldn't even fathom, let alone accept. Maybe she handled it better than her own family did? That would explain why she didn't immediately run into their arms once she escaped. She cooked, she cleaned, she shopped, she celebrated birthdays, searched for gifts, and gave him orders; meanwhile, he used suicide threats to blackmail her if she tried to leave. He worked and earned money. It functioned like a marriage. And believe me, I know—there are much worse setups out there.
She escaped because she WANTED to. I truly believe she could have done it much sooner.
She feels guilty because he took his own life, and now she’s terrified of being judged by the public.
In life, we tend to see what we want to see rather than the truth, simply because the truth is too uncomfortable or arrives too late. So, we inflate the drama and bend the narrative to fit our expectations.

Exactly. It's fascinating to me how everyone just blindly buys into her version of events, regardless of the glaring holes in the story.

And I'm also convinced there are much more valid reasons why she avoids seeing those elderly folks 😉 than the unconvincing excuses she gives.

Even with that whole "case," it's the tiny details that tell the real story... For instance, when they first brought her into the station and she "couldn't concentrate on the interrogation" because she was too busy staring at the officer's designer jacket and watch, or claiming she "couldn't talk for long unless the officer allowed it." Pretty interesting, isn't it? 👍