Posts by Michael Diaz6

graniteeagle3 said:I'm not joking... well, not entirely.
What I meant was... I haven't been in a relationship, nor have I had sex with anyone, regardless of gender.

Oh wow... so you're innocent?
And man... you're getting played by someone who knows what they're doing...
Just chill out.
You'll be fine.
Stop overthinking it.

Donna White50 said:So wait, if you aren't going all out, how exactly are you handling things down there? lol...🤣
Hahaha...
The guy's just messing with us—I asked him when he last hooked up and he totally dodged the question, which pretty much tells you everything you need to know...🍿

You really asked him "when was the last time you had sex"?
Maybe he can't answer because he's doing it right this second. 😂

He isn't joking around, I just turned the topic into a joke myself, though it wasn't entirely a joke..
By acting like he's "not serious," I'm basically taking the weight out of what he's saying so he realizes how ridiculous he sounds...
and eventually he'll stop.

It's actually more like therapy than a joke...
I guess I just realized he’s already in treatment. 😁

It’s kind of awkward to suggest this to a new partner
"Hey... why don't you play the angry CEO and I'll be the lazy employee getting disciplined"

You feel me?

I should probably write a book that's basically a social game—you know, group style—filled with all that dirty stuff...
Then you just go to a guy and say, "Oh, I got this for my birthday, wanna play?"
Whatever side we pick, we gotta follow the rules.

See what I mean?
It's just... you wouldn't want to ruin the vibe, and you aren't even that type of guy. It never even crossed your mind, you innocent soul..

graniteeagle3 said:Go ahead then—keep laughing and finding your little joy in someone else's misfortune.😁

😁 I’ve already cooked up a thousand dirty little schemes😂
If this were a real PDF, it'd be a joke...
😁

graniteeagle3 said:Your posts have actually made me laugh a few times before, but this? This isn't funny at all.
I was being honest when I mentioned having had thoughts regarding incest or zoophilia—that necrophilia is the one thing I haven't experienced yet. But honestly, it's just something that's still on my list.
To be perfectly clear, I am not actually attracted to incest or necrophilia.
Don't try to mess with my head—it's hard enough dealing with my own self-deprecation without you jumping in.🙂🙂

Whatever, man... if it's just a fantasy, anything goes.
You just gotta realize it's a dirty little fantasy you're into... not some actual sickness.

Actual sickos don't have doubts... they know exactly what they want.

Donna White50 said:I’ve got some seriously dirty thoughts that drive me crazy—until I actually try to make them happen. Then it’s usually just tears... because imagination is one thing, but real life is a whole different beast...😁

So you're really out here hitting us up on a Saturday afternoon, huh...
Man, you’re honestly just terrified of your own sexuality—you’re carrying around this massive amount of guilt over nothing more than some random fantasies... you've got yourself all wound up and repressed, your libido is basically non-existent, and now you're gonna try to claim you're going after kids? Give me a break...
Look, just stop messing with everything—seriously, just leave it alone. Between all those unanswered questions, the constant anxiety, that feeling of being stuck, and all that guilt... it’s no wonder you're feeling this way. Honestly? Your biggest issue isn't what's happening around you, it's that you won't just give yourself a break and you're overthinking every single little thing...🤣

Hahahahah, I'm actually tearing up laughing while typing this. Someone might actually think I'm the one with those kinds of fantasies.🤣
Damnnn.

I've got my share of dirty thoughts too, but I wouldn't do half that stuff in a million years.

graniteeagle3 said:I'm not quite sure why you'd think that? Why would he need to play dead when I haven't exactly been having any necrophilia fantasies up until now? :P

What do you mean "you haven't"? What are you even talking about here
"The only thing left is necrophilia."

Look, just play dead. Relax, stay still, and if you actually get an erection, then you lost. Then he's the corpse and you're just... well...

Go ahead and pretend he's your brother since incest used to turn you on too.

You guys are all freaks.🤣

And I guess all gay guys are just like you...

graniteeagle3 said:The zoophilia thoughts have passed, much like the ones involving incest did. Now, the only thing left is necrophilia.
But it feels like the fear itself is what feeds the cycle—I realize that intellectually, I know these are just intrusive thoughts, yet there is this persistent, nagging unrest in my mind that keeps whispering: "But what if they aren't?"

Right now, I find myself terrified that if I even brush against a child or catch their eye, I'll suddenly feel an attraction. And if that happens... what then?

oh man...
damnnnn.
Seriously though, you just need to find a guy who will satisfy all your—well, YOUR specific kinks. As long as it's just between the two of you, nobody else is getting hurt.

Let him play dead, then go to town...
you know how it is...
yeah...

Problem solved.

Just find a guy like that.

You aren't a predator.
You just have a dirty mind.
You'd probably love some seriously intense, kinky stuff in bed.
Find a partner you can actually trust with your fantasies.
Deep down, you're into CNC stuff.
So just ask your boyfriend to roleplay that kind of scenario with you...
You've got some heavy kinks.
Once you start exploring this with someone who truly gets you at your core, you'll look back and realize how much you were overthinking it. You might even feel silly for worrying so much.

What you really need is a friend who knows you well enough that you can share your darkest thoughts without feeling judged.

casualtinker19 said:Ever had one of those moments where you're deep in a dream, right at the peak of something massive, something actually significant... and then, just when everything is about to unfold, the alarm goes off or some other noise jerks you back to reality? Just leaves you hanging there... What were you dreaming about?

Happens to me all the time...
makes me wonder if my brain is just synced up to my iPhone alarm...
total coincidence or what... 😂

graniteeagle3 said:That is absolutely correct. If I tell myself right now, "Don't think about a giraffe," my brain is going to fixate on that giraffe relentlessly. And if I start worrying that I'm becoming obsessed with that giraffe, my brain will start sending me false signals that I actually *am* obsessed. It's because when I look at the giraffe, my mind starts racing toward sexual imagery, and suddenly I've convinced myself I'm aroused by the animal, when really, it's just the thought pattern itself.
Okay... as usual, I am overthinking things and writing far too much. 😁
The issue is that once I let something take root in my head, I become obsessive and start imagining things. If you start convincing yourself that you're attracted to a television set, you'll genuinely feel like you are. Once that passes, being near a TV feels perfectly normal again...

Our thoughts are such a convoluted, messy thing. They can be so deceptive. Everyone deals with negative thoughts, but the difference is that most people don't attach any weight to them. But this feels different. I just want to be able to act normally around children, just like I did before. My fear is that if I try to force normalcy, I'll trigger that "false signal" response where my brain tells me, 😈"Wait, what if seeing a child actually excites you right now?"

I often find myself in situations where my brain just starts firing off these nonsensical signals and obsessive loops.

Give this method a shot...

Sometimes I’ll just be sitting there, listening to a track or watching some documentary or movie...
Man, I honestly feel like breaking down and crying over this too.
I feel the same way. The more I push myself, the more it actually pays off—even at my day job. 😂

Then I just lost it... and told myself, "Go ahead, you idiot, pay up since you're clearly out of your mind."
And then I just couldn't bring myself to pay them anymore. 🤣

I’m telling you, I actually broke down crying too—and it hit me way harder just because of how they suspended him.

Maybe try getting a little mad at yourself for a second. Next time, just force yourself to sit there, look at your kid, and let your mind wander. Just be present.
The craving will disappear instantly if you aren't some kind of creep. You’ll start feeling sick to your stomach immediately. Honestly, you can take off all those ridiculous rose-colored glasses yourself when you're acting this stupid. You don't need anyone else to do it for you.
If you realize there’s zero resistance and you’re actually kind of digging it...
So you're basically admitting you're a pedophile then? You've got those urges, and if that's the case...
Doc.

You eventually have to stand up to whatever's been haunting you. Usually, it happens right when you're already completely burnt out.
Then you just plant your feet and charge straight at it.

Facing your fears is pretty much the only way you're actually going to get past them.

Donna White50 always hits the nail on the head. I was actually wondering the same thing—maybe it isn't even about being gay.

They say every big shift starts with a simple change in how you think.
Life is pretty easy to manage and build if you just control your headspace... whatever you spend most of your day thinking ABOUT eventually becomes your reality.
If I look at someone's life, I can tell you exactly what's going on in their mind.

Keeping those thoughts in check is the hardest part, but also the easiest once you figure out the trick.
Positive affirmations really are a game changer.

graniteeagle3 said:So, you think I should just go out and hug someone to make this fear disappear? I mean... it isn't a bad idea, really... but for now, I just don't have the nerve. Not until I find some actual courage and these intrusive thoughts finally decide to leave me alone.
My mind has always been my own worst enemy—it's just how I am, I suppose.
If I were to read something here on the forum right now that truly shook me, I could end up spiraling over it for days on end.

The longer you wait, the more weight you give this, and eventually, you'll trick your own subconscious into believing the lie.
Stop overthinking it and just say it out loud:
"I am not a predator, and I never will be."
Face the fear head-on.
Just don't turn it into some massive drama because the mind is a tricky thing.
It's like if a guy genuinely believes he's pregnant—his body can actually start mimicking pregnancy symptoms.
If you believe you're going to get sick... you will.
(That’s why you see those health nuts who live perfectly clean lives end up hitting the ICU—they're obsessed with staying healthy because they're terrified, just like you.)

Let it go...
Don't dwell on it; it's dangerous territory.
Stop making it a huge deal.
Your brain belongs to you, and yeah, it’s going to throw weird stuff at you sometimes.
Seriously...
WATCH WHAT YOU THINK 70% OF THE TIME—because that becomes your reality.

graniteeagle3 said:First off—just as a side note—I would never dream of suggesting a diet to anyone... assuming that was what you were implying? Because, frankly, I don't even know if I fit that description myself—and I mean this with total sincerity—but I have these doubts about whether I am a pedophile or not. It's strange... one part of my mind tells me yes, while another insists no.
As for sex being 90% of my life? Are you kidding me? That's preposterous.
If someone has a very low libido—someone who isn't constantly preoccupied with sexual thoughts or feeling turned on all the time—then that person is me... quite simply.

So there you go... you see what kind of mental loop you're stuck in...
you're just spiraling...
Look...
Just chill out.
It's not like it's written on your forehead.
You aren't a pedophile... your brain is just playing tricks on you.
Go give a kid a hug like you're their parent (or whatever gender you identify as 😂) and just stop overthinking it.

graniteeagle3 said:😲😲
No comment... I think I need a moment to process this before I can feel normal again.

Alright then... stop acting like sex is 90% of your existence.
And look... just remember you actually have control over what you do...
Even if you are some kind of predator...
If you can't even control your own body, then I'm telling you...
A knife is your best bet

Christian Johnson19 said:I’m stuck in a job I absolutely hate, but hey, who asked me? Every time I make a tiny mistake at work, I start spiraling. I’ll be sitting there overthinking everything—wondering if I’m getting fired, what my coworkers will say, what the boss thinks, or how much gossip is going to fly around the office. My role is super niche and high-demand, so honestly, they probably won't fire me anytime soon, but the anxiety is still real. It feels like everyone at the firm is just waiting for someone to slip up so they can have something to talk about. Even though I moved to a big city like NYC, I haven't really outgrown this habit of worrying about what people think. The truth is, I make these mistakes because I'm lazy and I just can't bring myself to care about this work. Sometimes I dream about starting something totally new, but that initial spark always dies out after a few weeks. Man, this is a whole spectrum of issues. I'm struggling to handle it all. Any advice? Thanks

Stop taking life so damn seriously
You'll bounce back from even the worst crap eventually...
Besides... we all end up in the ground one day anyway... nothing will matter then...
How much energy are you wasting being this stressed?
Just let it go.
"Who cares?"
Keep moving.

Reading this...
It’s honestly exhausting. It's not even about whether you are or aren't a predator; it's just that the sheer chaos in your head is hitting levels I didn't think were possible. 😂
You're never going to get better because...
nah, I don't see it happening. 🤣
You still have plenty of sex in your life, and then there's this...

My advice? Just go out and hurt yourself.
Either cut your junk off so sex stops running your entire existence... I swear, it feels like your whole life revolves around nothing else, so there you go...
Either deal with the dick or fix your brain...
One of those things has to go...

Is this a ban?
Hope not.

Donna White50 said:Guess it's my turn to teach you something for once—usually, it's the other way around... 🙂

Both you and I have this knack for helping everyone else while being totally useless when it comes to ourselves.
😁 You aren't actually as bad as you made yourself out to be above; you're just way too hard on yourself.
Honestly, someone else with your personality—just without all that self-criticism—wouldn't have any issues at all.
It’s our curse...

I mean, there’s definitely some truth to that.

Fair enough. There’s some truth to that..
even if at the end of the day everyone steps up to help me or at least promises the moon and stars...
It’s not like I do it for that... I can't and don't want to pay anyone back because, honestly... most of them aren't exactly winning right now either...

True... you're definitely a favorite among the moochers 🤣 and hey, fine... being used feels like that sometimes...

I don't see how I'm going to become a better version of myself if I get selfish and only look out for number one... though maybe this is just a different kind of selfish... hmmm... wait... how does a non-selfish person even live? 🤣

I know I have more luck than brains, 😂 because there's always someone showing up at just the right moment to pull me out of the gutter...
That's just "a higher power" at work...

And my main issue is that I need to love myself... but I think I first need to figure out what my actual goal in life is, then I'd actually fight for it... right now I'm just a bit lost... I don't know what's worth holding onto... so I just end up being useful... hoping I stumble upon some passion for something I actually give a damn about...
Then you'd see how easily I'd crush anything in my way..
But since I've got nothing... whatever..