Posts by William Roberts3

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nimblewolf11 said:What a beautiful and engaging description of an awakening! It’s actually even more impressive that you managed to "hold onto" that elegant state of alertness—seriously, kudos to you! 🙂

As for me, I don't think any period of heightened awareness has lasted longer than 20 or 30 days so far. And even during those stretches, it was always such a roller coaster—you know, one minute I’m there, and the next, I’m totally slipping. With every new connection I made, I really thought, "Okay, there's no going back to my old, worn-out ways." But maybe I just keep making the same naive mistakes in my assessments... it feels like something keeps pulling me backward. Still, it isn't a total slide back to my old self...
Regarding what you called "clicking"—my last "real" breakthrough happened at the start of March this year. I haven't written much about it in previous threads; I mostly just touched on it in passing. Honestly, I don't really feel like rehashing the same old stories. I could potentially link to those older posts, but let's be real—it wouldn't offer anything new or particularly exciting.
The little sparks I experience now and then are literally crumbs compared to what happened back then.

Regardless, the whole time, it just feels like it's so, so close... right within reach...

I love that phrase you used: an elegant, awake state. But about that part where you say you "maintained" it... man, that's Catch-22. There’s this weird paradox in trying to "hold onto" something that everyone already possesses. Why would you need to hold onto what you already are? You don't need to hold it—you just Are. When we start overanalyzing it or trying to tie it back to our old selves, that pure "Seeing" starts getting all foggy. We cloud that infinite, amazing, whole, all-encompassing, timeless, nameless, spontaneous space that we all inhabit and ARE.......... we totally muddy it up with concepts, with other people's visions, dogmas, or standards......... and then all you see again are just concepts, visions, dogmas, and standards.........

But honestly, those concepts, visions, and dogmas......... they all just happen within that spacious void. So nothing is really being "held onto," because you always and forever remain You, Me, and All of Us. We always stay as the clear screen where it all plays out.

I also find myself "watching" to see if it'll all stop one day, or maybe in a few hours. But for now, it's not stopping, and stuff keeps happening. I've had different little "experiences" before, but they usually lasted a couple of days at most, whereas this is sticking around. But again, I am the screen where it's all going down. We'll 😉

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nimblewolf11 said:What a beautiful and engaging description of an awakening! It’s actually even more impressive that you managed to "hold onto" that elegant state of alertness—seriously, kudos to you! 🙂

As for me, I don't think any period of heightened awareness has lasted longer than 20 or 30 days so far. And even during those stretches, it was always such a roller coaster—you know, one minute I’m there, and the next, I’m totally slipping. With every new connection I made, I really thought, "Okay, there's no going back to my old, worn-out ways." But maybe I just keep making the same naive mistakes in my assessments... it feels like something keeps pulling me backward. Still, it isn't a total slide back to my old self...
Regarding what you called "clicking"—my last "real" breakthrough happened at the start of March this year. I haven't written much about it in previous threads; I mostly just touched on it in passing. Honestly, I don't really feel like rehashing the same old stories. I could potentially link to those older posts, but let's be real—it wouldn't offer anything new or particularly exciting.
The little sparks I experience now and then are literally crumbs compared to what happened back then.

Regardless, the whole time, it just feels like it's so, so close... right within reach...

And 20 days is forever! That makes me so happy. To me, those fluctuations are just the work of a conditioned mind trying to maintain its rule and the reality it defends (can't really blame it, though, it's just used to 🙂). The Mind/Ego wants to be the King! It wants to be enlightened! Because it thinks that'll give it more power, knowledge, and control. Don't trust anyone who claims they are an enlightened person. That's just the unknown talking.
Once you catch a glimpse of the "real deal," even if it’s just for a millisecond, it sticks with you forever. That tiny flash of memory keeps pulling you back, but then that skeptical Ego worm starts crawling around, terrified it might actually die if it dares to look again while simultaneously craving all that power and control... it's a total unknown. Such an intense game, right? Action within inaction. Pure chaos inside perfect Harmony, Emptiness overflowing with Fullness, One,
TwoIsOne Two IS One.

nimblewolf11 said:What a beautiful and engaging description of an awakening! It’s actually even more impressive that you managed to "hold onto" that elegant state of alertness—seriously, kudos to you! 🙂

As for me, I don't think any period of heightened awareness has lasted longer than 20 or 30 days so far. And even during those stretches, it was always such a roller coaster—you know, one minute I’m there, and the next, I’m totally slipping. With every new connection I made, I really thought, "Okay, there's no going back to my old, worn-out ways." But maybe I just keep making the same naive mistakes in my assessments... it feels like something keeps pulling me backward. Still, it isn't a total slide back to my old self...
Regarding what you called "clicking"—my last "real" breakthrough happened at the start of March this year. I haven't written much about it in previous threads; I mostly just touched on it in passing. Honestly, I don't really feel like rehashing the same old stories. I could potentially link to those older posts, but let's be real—it wouldn't offer anything new or particularly exciting.
The little sparks I experience now and then are literally crumbs compared to what happened back then.

Regardless, the whole time, it just feels like it's so, so close... right within reach...

It feels like it's always RIGHT HERE, no effort needed, nothing to reach for...

It was June 25th, 2013, right around 8:00 PM. I actually have a message saved as proof of the date.

I was just wandering around my living room when I got this sudden, pleasant vibe that something was coming. I walked into the kitchen and felt this sudden "drop" (like a physical sensation of something descending).
What "dropped" was this incredibly light, almost imperceptible feeling—this indescribable lightness and clarity, like an endless expansion. It was this weird sense of being totally detached from everything else (I actually stepped out onto the balcony just to check what was happening to me), and it was like seeing the view from that balcony for the very first time, even though I look at it every single day. I looked at a nearby tree and felt this intense intimacy, just one with it. There was zero separation, just a connection without an "I"—just the tree. It was like I became the tree 🙂 🤣! At the exact same time, everything around me—the grass, the street, the buildings, the houses—looked so much more vivid, like I’d had some instant LASIK surgery that gave me super-human vision. My other senses spiked too. Everything feels stronger, more intense, even more painful, but shorter... 😢 🙂. Honestly, the pain isn't even an issue.

I remember about half an hour later, I wanted to tell someone about it, but there were no words, and honestly, there was no need to say anything, you know? But as those minutes passed, I started seeing the "aftermath" of that "drop." Everything just started resolving itself; things began to unfold naturally, flowing effortlessly. Life just seemed to handle itself, even though I was technically the one doing it. I don't really feel like "I" am doing anything 🤷 it just happens, I'm just moving along with the Whole within that Whole, and there's no "Me" versus the "Whole"! Just the Whole, the One, Life.
This "energy" started flowing through me like a river. I don't need nearly as much sleep anymore; 4 or 5 hours does the trick. Mentally and physically, I can go all day long; I get home and I'm still going, even if my body is wiped (it seems the body is the weakest link since it's stuck in "matter"). This "Energy," this "Force," drives my creativity in every direction, and it never runs dry. Even my relationships have seen all kinds of positive shifts as a result. Everything just flows. Sometimes now, when I pick up a "sacred" book or read some "holy" quotes, I actually "get" what the sage or poet is trying to point toward, whereas before, I couldn't make sense of it at all.
This sense of stability, security, presence, "chillness," openness, and harmlessness is always there. And truly, I wouldn't care if I woke up with some heavy, painful illness tomorrow, because I "know" that even that would just be part of Life for me. Even the death of my physical body is just part of Life.

I think I started posting on the forum the very next day, which was the first time I ever wrote anything publicly.

And really, nothing changed, yet everything changed completely.
It’s not even some superhuman, lofty experience; it’s just the natural, constant state of everyone and everything.

That's all for now, whatever Life brings next.......

I feel like we should start a thread dedicated solely to our own raw, honest takes on those famous "awakenings."
I’m putting "awakening" in quotes because, honestly, nobody can actually name "That" or explain it in plain English. An "awakening" isn't some recipe you can just follow!
It’s like reading a pancake recipe and following it perfectly—though some people wouldn't even know how to flip a pancake if they had a step-by-step guide. But an "awakening"... that's a massive mystery even after the "awakening" happens. You just can't describe what it is! "description doesn't apply" Buddha

Maybe the only thing you "can" really describe is the "aftermath" of an "awakening"—this new, clear, simple "Seeing." A sudden insight...

There's zero room for ego, arguing, judging, proving points, acting smart, or critiquing anyone else's "experience" of an "awakening" in this thread.
Because everyone's "experience" and the "aftermath" of their "awakening" is totally unique. There’s no high authority out there that gets to judge or grade your current or permanent "awakening." Your experience belongs to you and only you! It's one-of-a-kind, but it might resonate with others who’ve had an "awakening" or something close to it. Like, they just "get" you... they feel something familiar in your story...

Of course, some "awakenings" might not be "real awakenings," but if you "think" something might be an "awakening," please just share it honestly with us, even if it turns out to be something else. This is huge, because after reading someone's personal story, another person might be able to offer a "deeply profound direction, a signpost, or even a tiny little diamond of a tip" that could wake us all up to the "real" "awakening."

Sex is basically the spice of life.
You just gotta "surrender" to that raw, natural drive—some people call it kundalini or whatever—that everyone says you should be controlling and trying to kanaliziranje into something else 🙂
When two people just totally let go and dive in without that constant mental chatter like, "okay now I'll do this, then that move, then try that crazy technique, oh maybe we should attempt that multi-orgasm method later..." 😲.......

Without that inner monologue, sex becomes this spontaneous, ecstatic surrender where two people just lose themselves and melt into one. And the best part? The natural byproduct is this massive energy flow afterward that fuels your creativity or just leaves you feeling totally zen... depending on what you need in the moment. Sometimes you need that high-octane, revitalizing energy to crush your workday, and other times you just need that pure, releasing "tranquility" vibe. I bet plenty of people have felt this, but they just take it for granted and keep grinding away in their own little rat race.
Sometimes you really just need to stop and smell the roses.

People who mess around trying to manipulate that natural life force or "kundalini" often end up in some pretty rough spots. Nature doesn't really let you meddle with its processes just for your own gain, let alone against someone else. Honestly, most people who try to force that kind of kanaliziranje just end up flushed down the drain in the end.

P.S. This is just my take on things, I'm not trying to be right or anything.
Just sharing my thoughts!

Brandon Foster7 said:Care to elaborate? I'm just guessing at what you actually meant there.

One day... someone enters deep meditation and hits that flow state (which is always shifting!)... suddenly they get this "insight" and start wondering: "Wait, what am I even doing?? The stuff I'm feeling right now is exactly what I feel in my daily life! There’s zero difference between meditating and just living! Something, someone, nobody is meditating and perceiving all these shifting states. But who is actually doing the meditating? Who is perceiving it?"
Who or what is that?
In the end, just like at the start, there's only Life itself, existing without anyone needing to "live" it! Oops, here comes the grand Mind again, starting to get frustrated by everything it just read... 🙂

Who suffers? And why?
The answer lies in this totally mind-bending paradox that NOBODY actually suffers! Suffering just exists on its own. But then, it still feels like SOMEONE is suffering! In that illusion, that game, that dream: a Person, an "I," says "I am suffering, this body with a name has pain and it hurts me so much!" But PAY ATTENTION: That's just a San Francisco dream, a game, an illusion—something that looks real but isn't! That's the Mind talking again... 🙂 🙂 🙂

Suffering definitely exists!
But the difference between suffering itself and saying "I am suffering" is non-existent 🙂 yet totally different!!! 🙂 😉
"One day"... or maybe even right now... "Someone" or "No one" will finally see it. When that happens, that "No one" will probably start laughing from the bottom of their heart, and maybe even cry like never before, experiencing a massive sense of relief and relaxation for the first time—that feeling that everything is just fine...

Brandon Foster7 said:I’m curious to hear from anyone who’s spent some serious time diving into stuff like meditation, yoga, manifestation techniques, Reiki, or breathwork.

How long did you stick with it?
What kind of results actually showed up?
Are you still doing it?
And do you think beginners get way too obsessed with the technical side of things?

I personally spent about a year messing around with manifestation/transurfing. It helped me stay focused on my goals, which is cool. I haven't had any massive, life-altering breakthroughs like the books promise, but I’m not even mad about it. It’s fine by me.

Honestly, it drives me crazy when people go all-in on something and swear by it before they've seen any actual results—they just swallow the hype without a shred of skepticism. To me, that whole vibe feels a little culty.

Just living life is the ultimate meditation...