Posts by ruggednomad5

Thanks, Ethan Bailey18. Once I sort out this first issue, everything should be fine... 🙂

Much appreciated 🙂 going to fix that right away

I need some help here... I was just at the IRS office and the manager told me to file an amended sales tax return for July 2013, but she honestly doesn't even know how to handle it... Basically, I originally reported one acquisition when I should have reported two. My question is: on the amendment, do I need to list both acquisitions or just the one I missed? Everything was accounted for in the final settlement...

And I'll attach the inquiry here too 🙂)

They're processing my sales tax form right now

I need some help here... I was just at the IRS office and the manager told me to file an amended sales tax return for July 2013, but then she admitted she isn't actually sure how to handle it... Basically, I reported one acquisition when I should have reported two. My question is: when I file this amendment, do I need to report both transactions, or just the one I missed? Everything was accounted for in the final settlement...

Second thing... I reported my acquisition, but my supplier over in the European Union hasn't filed their ZP yet... The agent at the IRS says we need to give them a heads-up about it... but my director says he’s not interested in dealing with the headache. If I just submit copies of the invoices, will that be enough?

Thanks in advance for any input 🙂

Jason Ortiz5 said:What exactly do you mean by "people like me"?

Look, putting aside how much you love to hear yourself talk and how "eloquent" you think you are, every single thing you write just screams contempt for parents. It’s honestly pretty sad to see someone with that attitude working in education. Actually, it’d be just as tragic if you worked in any field that requires talking to actual human beings. 😢

A huge part of being a professional is just realizing that everyone is different. People think differently, react differently, and have different levels of schooling... some people are a total breeze to work with, while others are tough, or slow to catch on, or just have strong opinions. Sure, it would be way easier if everyone just treated whatever service they were getting as gospel and nodded along like mindless drones. Luckily, at least in my line of work, we don't have many of those types. If we did, incompetent people who are just good at sucking up would be running the show, and everything would fall apart. Education is especially sensitive in that regard, in my opinion. A great educator can change a kid's life, but a bad one can cause real damage. And at the end of the day, parents are parents. Despite how much you try to play smart, most of them just love their kids and want what's best for them. Lots of people mess that up, but teachers mess up too. Parents are often the only ones who will actually question what's happening in a classroom and call out things that aren't good for the kids. Because let's face it—other teachers won't. They might gossip about a colleague's incompetence behind closed doors, but the second an outsider asks a question—even if it isn't criticism, just a genuine question—they all band together to defend one of their own. They don't seem to realize that by doing that, the actually talented and capable ones are just dragging down their own profession.

Shout out to the exceptions, though. Thank goodness there are some...

You’re making a mountain out of a molehill...

Maybe I jumped into the wrong thread, but I had to say...

From the moment my kid hit first grade through the end of elementary school, I spent endless hours arguing with everyone... school administrators, doctors, specialists... just non-stop. In that first year, he treated his teacher like some preschool nanny. It drove her absolutely insane because the kid had zero concept of authority. He didn't get why he was forced to sit at a desk for 45 minutes straight when he was exhausted... there were constant battles on both sides. Honestly, I have no idea how he managed to stay so high-strung all the way through fifth grade...

I don't hold any grudges against the teachers or the grading... none at all. All those points they docked, whether they meant to or not? They actually ended up doing us a favor...

Every single time we talked to counselors, principals, or teachers, our approach was always cooperation. If they suggested a psychologist? We’d book an appointment. They suggested a specialist at Mayo Clinic for testing? We were there. We never made a scene with the kid over any of it. He learned early on that seeing a psychiatrist isn't some big, terrifying ordeal—you just sit down, have a civilized talk with the doctor, maybe get a candy bar out of it. He even got a clean bill of health. By high school, he realized that just because a teacher is an authority figure doesn't mean they're infallible, though he'd still play along just to keep the peace. Now, whenever he walks onto the school grounds, there isn't a faculty member who doesn't stop to say hello... just a friendly chat...

Regarding that point in the original post... the kid is only in fifth grade. He isn’t slow just because he has dyslexia. Stop treating it like some terminal illness. He’s going to face a thousand more injustices because of this condition later on...

Kenneth Lopez19 said:So, by that I mean 70 and up. What’s your take on this—do the older generations get in the way of the younger ones?
Thanks!

It's an interesting topic and feels like one we haven't touched on yet, so edit:

Ageism (ageism) refers to prejudices based on a person's age, though we usually focus on biases against the elderly.
It stems partly from gerontophobia—an irrational fear or hatred of aging and older people.

When explaining ageism and gerontophobia, Terror Management Theory (TMT; Greenberg et al., 1986) is the dominant framework. Put simply, older people serve as a reminder of our own fragility and mortality, highlighting the limits of our lifespan. Out of fear for our own deaths, older individuals trigger anxiety in us, which we attempt to manage by rejecting them. It's a way to distance ourselves from what we might eventually become.

Ageism is just a prejudice against our own terrifying future selves. (Nelson Mandela, 2009).

We can distinguish between benevolent and hostile ageism. Benevolent ageism involves viewing older people through stereotypes rooted in pity or a fear of aging. Hostile ageism involves active dislike or repulsion, viewing the elderly as worthless or otherwise negative.

If they're worried about it, then yeah, they're a problem...

Brenda Booth5 said:I couldn't agree more. I tend to look at this through the lens of basic human decency... If someone sitting next to me in a coffee shop started shouting uncontrollably and being rude, it would be just as problematic as if it were a child doing it. It's all about respect, regardless of who it is.

Yeah, it's funny how we expect kids to master social etiquette way faster than most adults ever will... but honesty goes a long way. Kids aren't stupid. They can tell when you're being real with them.

I read somewhere about a kid swearing at his mother... look, you keep it short and blunt: I DON'T ALLOW THAT. If they do it again... fine. Pack up their clothes, grab their socks, and get out of my house.
(And even if they leave, they'll probably crash at a friend's place for two nights before crawling back... everyone misses home eventually). Things cool down, and then we can actually deal with whatever the real issue was...

Brenda Booth5 said:Look, I understand that everything is temporary, but I find it so strange to just sit there twiddling my thumbs during these outbursts. I remember when my own kids went through that stage; looking back, they were actually pretty mild compared to what two-year-olds are truly capable of, but my instinct is still to distance myself when a child starts spiraling. I’ll slip away like a ghost or duck behind a corner. It's the fastest way to handle it—not because I'm "embarrassed," but because changing the environment can help break the cycle or at least dampen the noise.

Fine, I accept that every kid is different, but just standing there passively waiting for the storm to pass isn't working for me. Is there some unwritten rule that a tantrum has to play out to its bitter end right in front of an audience? I haven't heard of one. All I know is that every twenty years or so, parenting theories get completely overhauled or rebranded into something "new"... it never seems to stay settled for long.

A meltdown can finish its course, sure, but it doesn't have to be a public performance—especially if that "audience" is at a park or a Target. Why should some random stranger be forced to listen to my kid's chaos?! 🙂
If it's a quiet sulk, fine, stay right there. If they want to talk through it, great. But loud, explosive tantrums? Those can happen in their bedroom instead.

I think it's vital for a parent to set boundaries and let the child know that the screaming is unacceptable. Doing that doesn't make you a bad parent.

Nicholas King said:That’s just wrong.

You start teaching them how to "handle life" at the exact same time you teach them to walk—actually, maybe even earlier than that.

It is precisely those parents who wait until their kid is 15 or 16—or whatever age they deem appropriate—to finally start teaching them some basic life skills, who end up completely losing their minds wondering why things turned out the way they did with their precious little darling.

I agree..... I phrased it that way because that's when they actually start maturing into adults. The questions and dilemmas become much more real, more intense. Information hits them at warp speed, and they need to know how to process it all.

Rachel Jones8 said:Maybe we should just lock kids up somewhere so they never see the light of day.
Not a bad thought.
😁

It’s actually not a bad idea. 😉

This whole "puberty" phase excuse is nonsense. Age dictates behavior. We teach them how to walk, we teach them how to handle life at 15 or 16... whether you call those years puberty or a damn potato doesn't change anything.

There is no excuse for being a jerk... if I'm having an orgasm, it doesn't mean I get to act however the hell I want.

Nicholas King said:Look, I know you aren't talking about that kid from the Folgers coffee commercial, but—honestly—I can't for the life of me think of any way in which Anne Frank would be remotely relevant to this discussion.

It doesn't have to be her, obviously. The point is that unbearable adolescence... that's the parallel. When life doesn't let you go through an unbearable adolescence, you just learn to settle for a tolerable one...

Nicholas King said:It isn't exactly a productive use of time to sit there and obsessively scrutinize everyone else's posts.

what if Anne Frank had been dealing with puberty like this???

What on earth are you talking about? Where did Anne Frank even come from? 😕

Look, I agree with you, I was paying attention. 🙂

Anne Frank, that little Jewish girl during WWII...
it's easy to say—they're teenagers, so what if they are? Let their hormones run wild, sure, but that doesn't mean anyone else should have to suffer for it...

Nicholas King said:If that were actually true—which, let’s be honest, it isn't—then there is no cure, I suppose; the only solution would be to just sit there and wait for that awful cause to simply... pass.

Blaming absolutely everything on "oh, it's just puberty" is pretty much like justifying every single instance of female irrationality with PMS🙂.

There's nothing to wait for... what if Anne Frank had been dealing with that kind of "puberty"???

Nicholas King said:Well, let’s be honest—the child didn't have any free time either. Or rather, the child didn't have much of anything.

After all that, the kid ends up without a computer, and the father is left without—well, what exactly?

It honestly makes me feel a bit sick when people try to hide their own massive failures under the guise of Spartan discipline—it's a total cop-out. (A kid who is being forced to grind away at books is simply a child who hasn't actually been taught how to learn in the first place).

I’ll say it again regarding the bolded part: the father lost his free time because he was busy teaching the kid.

No need to act all high and mighty or condescending on this forum.

Yeah, the kid didn't learn how to study. We aren't perfect parents. Look, there are all kinds of us out there...

Nicholas King said:If the punishment for the kid's portion of the guilt was losing his computer, then what exactly did the tough-as-nails father sacrifice to cover his own share of the blame?

I mean, if we're going for a strict approach here, then I suppose the rules should apply equally to everyone involved.

Two months of zero free time because I'm stuck glued to a textbook instead of doing anything else... just trying to keep up with my kid.

Nicholas King said:Well, they say you can't put out fires in the middle of winter.

I wonder what Spartan Dad actually did to try and prevent those grades from tanking in the first place?

You're spot on. We missed the window. It's just how it went down. We didn't step in early enough, so things spiraled.
What did he do? Nothing. Just like me... I didn't do much more than ask the usual daily questions about school and if any grades came in.

We split up the subjects among ourselves, and somehow managed to get the grades sorted out.

Brenda Chase3 said:Yes, that is indeed the correct number. Companies that already have an established history of international trade will typically find their VAT identification number automatically, whereas those just starting to deal with partners outside the US will need to submit a formal application.

Thanks for the info. 🙂

Hi

The company just received an EIN from Customs—basically the US tax ID and business number... Is that actually the VAT identification number, or do we still need to file a formal request?
Thanks 😁

Scott Miller4 said:And look, we’ve definitely kept our own individual identities, but when it comes to raising the kids, we act like a single "parenting institution." We might drift apart occasionally, but generally, we try not to let things get too extreme.

Yeah, we mostly see eye to eye on this too...
But here's an example. My husband told the boys no computer until the end of the school year because their grades tanked—that was about two months ago. We were both on board with that decision... but now, the kids have actually pulled their grades up. I’m ready to cave and let them have it back, but he won't budge. He's worried they'll just slide right back into bad habits the second they sit down at the desk 🤷

I'm not a fan of punishments. Honestly, I think this might be the first time we've ever actually disciplined them like this...

Nicholas King said:But why exactly?

Are we supposed to maintain this facade of being a monolithic, perfectly infallible unit just to appease our "common disciplinary adversary"—the child? I mean, honestly—what is the catastrophic fallout if one parent simply admits they made a mistake in how they handled a situation? It seems rather performative to me.

And as for that whole bit about "scattering the children to show them their place," I’m afraid I don't quite follow your logic there... 😢

I agree, it's impossible for parents to be perfectly in sync all the time.

I've got two teenage boys at home and sometimes my husband and I just don't see eye to eye on discipline. He leans more towards a strict, Spartan approach, while I tend to explain things... though I've learned to dial that back after enough experience.

A few times now, his way has actually worked better. It might not be the most "educational" method, but whatever... he's the father. You learn to live with it.😁