Seriously, nobody can touch your confidence unless you hand them the keys to your headspace. Who cares what they’re whispering? You don't live inside their heads—you live in your own skin. It shouldn't matter one bit if they call you stuck-up or, even worse, throw around slurs about your sexuality. People can be such absolute idiots sometimes, and honestly, it feels like there are more of them every day—and you know why? Because they're just jealous and pathetic. They take all their own frustrations out on everyone else just to feel something. If I were dealing with people like that, I'd just give them a polite "get lost" and cut them out of my life entirely. I'd hold my head even higher, because at the end of the day, even if they're talking behind your back, you're still miles ahead of them.
Honestly, the only people who can really step in here are your parents—though it’s honestly kind of wild to me that they haven't sat you down to talk about how you've been acting—or maybe a pro, like a therapist or a psychiatrist. You can totally break out of that "armor" you've built up and ditch all that resentment toward everyone else, but only if you actually want to. If you want anyone to lend a hand, you've gotta be the one driving the change first. Don't just shut yourself off and keep playing those same old mental movies on loop. It doesn't get you anywhere—it just drags you deeper into the hole.
Look, you’re 30 years old—you’re plenty grown up to just walk away from all this nonsense once and for all. Honestly? Just forget about your "dad"—he was never really there to begin with, so what is there even to lose? Your mom is just as much of a wild card, and frankly, she isn't any better than he was. And now you’re expected to play teacher to your half-brothers? I mean, seriously, why are they even in college if there’s zero money to cover it? If I were in your shoes, I’d just pack my bags, head to a different part of the country, find a solid job, meet some decent guy, and just try to live a normal life.
I’ve actually got this really special guy in my life right now, and being with him makes me realize just how much of a skeptic I’ve been—and honestly, still am—when it comes to men. He gives me so much attention and support, yet I find myself constantly second-guessing him... I just can't seem to let my guard down. I don't even know if I ever will, which breaks my heart so much I just end up crying about the whole thing..
Look, here’s the absolute most important part—you have this incredible person by your side. Just give him your trust and see what happens; life will show you if he's truly earned it. As for forgiving your dad—honestly, I think what you're doing is more like ignoring him. You might never be able to fully forgive him for all the hurt he caused. It was a good move writing that letter, though; sometimes you just need to get it out to feel better. Let him know exactly where he stands. If it were me? I’d probably just tell him off to his face and call it a day, even if I never spoke to him again. Don't let the baggage your parents handed you weigh you down—they did what they did, and hey, you didn't exactly ask to be born, right? They made that choice. Trust me, you aren't the only one dealing with parents like that. But listen—there's a saying that goes: MY CHILDHOOD WASN'T PERFECT—BUT AT LEAST IT FINISHED. You aren't dependent on your father anymore. You're 30 years old and you've got your whole entire life ahead of you! Just lean into that special connection you have... because love really does work wonders. 👍
Kimberly Morris said:Ugh, seriously, I feel like I've tried everything... But when I wake up hitting a wall of panic attacks and depression, and there's this constant urge to just scream my head off... I honestly start worrying I'm losing my mind or sliding into some kind of psychosis.
Listen, if you haven't slipped into psychosis by now, you aren't going to. Your doctors would have caught those signs way earlier and adjusted your treatment plan differently if that were happening. Seriously though—take everything you've shared here and lay it all out for your psychiatrist. They’re going to have much better tools and actual medical strategies for handling these panic attacks and social anxiety than anyone on a random internet forum ever could! Just please, don't give up on yourself—and definitely keep showing up to your therapy sessions, because I really think that's going to be the game-changer for you.
Kimberly Morris said:Thanks so much. She prescribed me Normabel, but I haven't touched it because my conscience is killing me and I'm worried about how it interacts with my Prozac. I'm just constantly spiraling, wondering when the meds will kick in or if they even will at all...
It’s gonna kick in soon, trust me. Every single morning when you roll out of bed, just tell yourself—"Starting today, things are looking up... and every day is getting better and better." You've gotta convince your subconscious that this medication is doing its job and helping you more every single day—don't let those old anxieties keep nagging at you! Show your subconscious who's actually running the show here. You've totally got this! Just remember that fear is basically just a mental illusion—if you let it take the driver's seat, it’s just going to keep circling back to haunt you. So don't throw in the towel! Believe in yourself and your ability to kick this anxiety to the curb. 👍
Kimberly Morris said:Day 12 on Zoloft. Honestly? It’s just getting worse by the hour. My psychiatrist is basically telling me to white-knuckle it for at least three weeks to see if anything sticks. But seriously... is it actually possible for this stuff to do absolutely nothing at all yet?!
It’s totally possible. Seriously, listen to your doctor. Twelve days is basically nothing when you're waiting for these things to kick in. I'm not sure which anxiolytic you're taking or what your specific limit is while pregnant, but that might help bridge the gap until the antidepressant starts doing its thing. Just follow your medical team's lead—managing anxiety and depression during pregnancy is a whole different ballgame. People on this forum can try to help, obviously, but we can't give you the full picture because of your situation. Also, just keep in mind that it's not just about the anxiety; you've got those pregnancy hormones throwing everything out of whack, too! Hang in there—it'll get better once the medication settles in. Don't stress over the exact timeline; just trust that it's working. You've got this! Good luck! 👍
I honestly think his double life played a massive role in why all that cash just vanished. Every single time—seriously, for the billionth time—I tell him he needs to sort out his retirement funds, he gives me the exact same line: "I don't have time to mess around with that stuff; your mom and brother need millions to get by, so I've gotta focus on making the big bucks."
These are the absolute clinchers from what you wrote. Look, you can’t really give him an unbiased assessment because, well, he’s your dad. He’s a hypocrite because he was living this whole secret life, playing the part of the perfect father to both families, which is probably why you find yourself defending him. I'm not blaming you, though—it's easy to only see those bright, happy moments when he was actually being good to you. You mentioned his wife spent a ton on groceries rather than makeup, designer clothes, or going out. What does that tell me? It tells me she’s a good person who just wanted the best for her kids, and she doesn't even realize her entire marriage is built on one giant lie. If I were in your shoes, I’d sit your mother down and tell her about his other family and his son. She deserves to know who she’s actually living with instead of constantly being accused by her husband of overspending. On top of that, she’s dealing with a sick child (your brother)... she's got enough on her plate. People like your father honestly terrify me. Just total hypocrites who spend their entire lives lying to themselves and everyone else.
It’s honestly wild how one person can wreck so many lives just because they decided to follow their impulses instead of using their brain for once. I mean, seriously, people like that should be ashamed—cheaters and liars are just the absolute worst. I went through your whole post, and man, I can only come to one conclusion: your entire family, plus that other side of the family too, are all just victims of one massive, crooked liar—your dad. Sorry if that sounds super blunt, but honestly, there’s no other way to put it. If I were you, my advice would be to focus entirely on your kid and your husband. You can help your brother out as much as you're able, but when it comes to him and your mom—if money is actually tight—just do what you can. Personally? If I were in your shoes, I’d have told my old man exactly what I thought of him to his face and then I wouldn't look back. Ever.