Posts by Charles Murphy6

The education system in this country has been reduced to absolutely nothing. Period. I honestly don't even have the words to adequately describe this absolute state of misery and failure.

I’ve had people like this in my orbit before, and honestly, at first, I was completely out of my depth. I was like Alice in Wonderland, wandering around with this naive, almost delusional conviction that people are fundamentally decent—maybe they have bad days, sure, but they’re good at heart.
But this woman😛—and frankly, I’m struggling to find a more polite descriptor—she possesses enough chaotic energy to fuel twenty people in a workspace. She’s constantly droning on about how much she does for everyone and how much she’s carrying, when in reality, she’s absolutely useless. And when she sets her sights on someone? God help them.😁
We’ve had several clashes. One time, things nearly escalated into a full-blown physical brawl.🙈
She stormed into my office just to insult me, and I told her, "Why don't you go take a stroll, grandma?" and she started shrieking, and I stood up, and it was inches away from turning ugly, though luckily I still possess some semblance of self-control.
Anyway, I’ve found myself on the receiving end of her borderline schizophrenic outbursts more times than I care to count, and I’ve tried everything—shouting back, trying the calm, quiet approach to get her to settle down, ignoring her entirely... nothing works.
It finally came to a head when she spun such a disgusting web of lies that she managed to turn half the office against me; she lied through her teeth, and somehow I ended up being the villain in a drama I didn't even know I was starring in. My colleagues actually believed her, even though they’re frequently the targets of her terror themselves. Since then, I’ve just tell myself: these are my coworkers, damn it, they are who they are. You do your job fairly and honestly, and then you go home to your family and your real friends who have nothing to do with your career. Quitting my job because of one crazy woman?? Not a chance.
You have to be mentally tough, maintain a solid sense of self-esteem, and use plenty of mantras, because you are bound to run into people like this. It’s as if the doors to the asylum were left wide open.🤣
What I can say—and what others used to tell me when I was younger—is that you harden as you age and gain maturity. I can confidently say I am no longer some pushover who just sits there in silence. I used to be. Now, when anyone, even a supervisor, starts screaming at me for no reason, I stand my ground. I am not a punching bag—I certainly wasn't in the past, and people definitely took advantage of that. Well, now that I’ve flipped the script, they’ve been absolutely blindsided by the fact that the old Charles Murphy6, who used to let anyone walk all over her, is gone. Finally, Charles Murphy6 has grown up.😍

And here I am, setting some kind of unintentional record🙄
Today—I didn't crawl out of bed until 1 PM...
I actually turned in around 1 AM, but when I finally opened my eyes, I genuinely thought it was only about 11...
Then, to make matters worse, I ended up crashing next to my husband in the afternoon while we were watching *Law & Order*🙄 and passed out for another two hours flat...
As I’ve mentioned somewhere else before, I don't have a thyroid, so I really ought to schedule an appointment to get my hormone levels checked out properly.
It’s true that when I’m under heavy stress, sleep becomes impossible, but lately, even after I finally manage to unwind, I just sleep and sleep; honestly, this feels like a personal record, which is exhausting because sleeping is my only outlet for stress, yet I dream so much that it actually wears me out—I can remember almost every single dream from a seven-hour stretch, and let me tell you, they aren't exactly pleasant.
It’s actually a little frightening. I have to be back at work on Tuesday...
To be fair, everyone around me seems to have had their sleep cycles completely trashed lately.
Everyone is complaining about how much they're sleeping; I suppose we all paid the price for those lazy years of overindulging and staying up late, and now the pendulum has swung violently in the other direction. I've set my alarm for 10 AM tomorrow, and I’ll have to find some way to actually drag myself out of bed...
Whatever—I think I'll just ask my manager if I can switch to the night shift instead.😁

I’ve essentially signed my life away to the bank until 2036.
The interest rates have skyrocketed through the roof, and honestly, I am just beyond frustrated with this banking institution.
My parents weren't in a position to help me out, and I don't hold it against them; when I struck out on my own to start a new life, I never expected anything from them.
Every now and then they might toss a little cash my way, but nothing was ever a given.
Inheritance can be a massive curse—at least, that’s certainly been my experience.
Since I was the one looking after my parents, I ended up inheriting the bulk of their small apartment holdings; in fact, I’m still caring for my mother, though my father recently passed away.
Why do I call it a curse? Because if you have a sibling who hasn't shown up or even checked in on you for years, they suddenly remember you exist the second a parent dies just so they can claim a piece of the pie.
And that is where the absolute nightmare begins. At my mother's insistence, I agreed to take care of her because she actually trusts me, but in exchange, my sister has unleashed a torrent of curses, insults, and hysterics that would make a psychiatric ward look calm by comparison.
Do I really need this drama? Everyone tells me I deserve the inheritance, especially since I have a child to think about, but then again, the mental toll is immense.
Family means everything to me, and I try not to dwell on debt; I wrote down the year 2036 here 😁 because if I constantly obsess over it, I’ll lose my mind. Sometimes it hits me when my wonderful husband pulls out the math showing that after eight years, we haven't even dented the principal, and the total amount has ballooned as if I’d bought a massive mansion in D.C. instead of a tiny 45-square-meter apartment.
I won't let myself stay frustrated—even if it feels overwhelming right now—we have to move forward.
I know plenty of people who inherited wealth only to find themselves completely miserable.
Is money or an inheritance truly a source of happiness?
I personally don't think it is.

crimsongull20 said:What do you mean "all"? Class treasurers have been collecting amounts like that since basically the end of World War II. If your kid doesn't want to do it, someone else will. It's just a standard duty, for crying out loud.

I truly hope you actually took the time to read my previous post🙂

rowdypanther12 said:I honestly don't get why he needs to carry cash around there. 😕

So, I went ahead and asked my daughter about it.
The whole thing is such a mess because the teacher never bothered to set a specific deadline for turning in the money, so now she’s just lugging it around constantly like some kind of amateur courier.😵
I actually suggested she just leave the collected funds at home and then bring them over in one go once everything is gathered, but apparently, that wasn't an option.
Now we're stuck playing this waiting game—either they'll somehow manage to hand over the full amount by the end of the school year, or we’ll all be stuck with a disastrously extended summer break while they scramble to collect the rest. It's ridiculous.🙂
Honestly, I'm done stressing over this nonsense, so please excuse me for venting and bothering you all with my grievances.😁

crimsongull20 said:Absolutely. Kids need to learn how to handle money and obligations; being the class treasurer is actually a great way to learn that.

I can't believe we've reached a point where being a simple class treasurer is considered unbearable stress that needs to be removed from a child. What kind of adults are we going to raise if we shield them from every basic responsibility?

I have to disagree here. My kid is incredibly responsible and takes things seriously. That said, having someone else's $300$133 just sitting on you isn't exactly a comfortable position, even for an adult like myself.
If anyone is implying that I'm spoiling my child, they couldn't be more wrong because my kid is anything but spoiled.
And I haven't pressured them one bit about whether they want to collect the money or not; I'm just sitting back and observing. Of course, I would step in and cover the funds if they went missing, but does everything really need to be this dramatic?

amberskipper3 said:You didn't actually tell us how the teacher is handling this responsibility.
You're basically just guessing because you don't actually know why she needs to bring cash to school every day.
Maybe try suggesting a different way to handle the collections.
As for "snatching it from her back"—if you intervene like that without her knowing, it's going to backfire. Your daughter could easily take it as a sign that she failed at the task she was given, or worse, that you don't trust her.
That would be a total disaster.

How does she actually feel about it? From what I can see, the pressure is clearly getting to her. She carries a specific wallet for this, keeps a meticulous list of who contributed, and honestly, it breaks my heart to see how much it hurts her when certain kids make snide comments implying she might spend the money herself.

When I use the term "little pickpockets," I’m talking about those kids who can’t resist sticking their hands into someone else's backpack. Up until now, it’s just been little things like hair ties or erasers, but I am genuinely terrified that money will be next on the list since everyone knows exactly where she keeps it.
She isn't going to carry the cash every single day—only when the teacher tells her to bring in everything that's been collected. But the problem is that they bring it to her bit by bit every day, which is really just a symptom of how poorly organized this classroom management is...
Honestly, I’ve always been against having a designated class treasurer anyway. Let the teacher collect the funds, hand them over to the school's accounting department, and call it a day.

I used to work in school health services 👏—covering all four grade levels—so believe me when I say I’ve seen enough dirty ears and unkempt nails to last a lifetime🤣🤣
My little girl doesn't have the slightest clue that I even see an issue here. I just keep my mouth shut.
As for why she carries cash around every single day? Honestly, I haven't a clue... though I do know some little delinquent broke in once and I'm terrified my girl might end up spending it all 🙄 so I suppose she feels the need to account for every cent she has on a daily basis... at least that's my best guess..
And besides that—what if someone swipes it while she's out at recess since some of the kids stay in the classroom while others head outside? They have a few real "characters" in her class who definitely know she's carrying cash..
If I catch her, I'll just give her a subtle, pointed lecture while she's taking off her backpack at home.. 🙂
And let's be real, she's a model student through and through—she definitely takes after her mother:)))))

So, what am I supposed to do now?🤷
Should I just tell my teacher to stop breathing down my neck and leave me alone?

Is it actually standard practice for elementary schoolers—and honestly, maybe even middle schoolers too—to be appointed as class treasurers?
My little girl was apparently "honored" with this prestigious little responsibility.🙄.
Now she’s constantly lugging around whatever cash they're collecting for some school project, and frankly, I can't say I'm thrilled about it.
It isn't like we're talking about some massive fortune here, but the fact that she's carrying it back and forth between home and school every single day just sits wrong with me.
Beyond that, it's our money—the lunch money or pocket change I hand her for her sandwich or whatever else. This whole setup just infuriates me.
Shouldn't the teacher be the one handling the collections instead?

I actually keep a donor card right in my wallet, along with all my husband's contact information. It’s really just a precaution because certain members of my family wouldn't exactly be thrilled about my choices, so I figured I might as well have everything laid out clearly in writing 😛
. I’m fully planning on living a long, healthy life, obviously, but just in case things take an unexpected turn, that card is tucked away in my wallet for good measure.

Larry Howard4 said:I wanted to weigh in here. In my experience working in the US school system, the homeroom teacher is basically the one who flags subject teachers if a student is struggling with anything specific. At the start of the school year, the rosters aren't even fully updated yet—it's just a list of names. We honestly don't have the bandwidth to dig into every single kid's background right away.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not making excuses for the teacher. I choose my words very carefully because the last thing I want to do is hurt a child, but she definitely handled this poorly.
That said, threatening her with termination feels like overkill. She apologized, she clearly got the message, and I'm pretty sure it won't happen again.
Maybe it’s just my professional bias talking, but look at the flip side: if a student told a teacher they were stupid, they probably wouldn't face any disciplinary action at all. In most American schools nowadays, given how things work, they likely wouldn't even get a slap on the wrist.

This is just a glaring sign of poor organization and a total lack of cooperation among faculty. During that first week of classes—as difficult as it may be to carve out the time, it is absolutely essential—there should be a meeting involving all subject teachers and the previous year's homeroom teachers. You need the guidance counselors there too. You go through the roster student by student and ensure everyone has detailed information on everyone else. That is how it ought to work, and frankly, that's how some schools actually manage to function.
I have to admit, I can be quite a blunt person, and if I were in that classroom, that teacher would definitely not have fared well with me.

Jason Ortiz5 said:We’re just getting started with our school year, but man, looking back at what I had to read versus the list my kid is staring at today... I can't help but feel like school reading lists are basically designed to kill any actual desire to read, even for kids who actually enjoy it.

Honestly, I’m right there with you. I mean, we live in an era filled with such incredibly vibrant and wonderful children's literature, yet they insist on clinging to this same stale rotation of books that my parents probably had to suffer through too...
Look, I get it—these are famous authors and significant historical figures, but for heaven's sake, show a little creativity! Has anyone actually bothered to ask parents or kids what they actually find engaging? Because forcing them to slog through these texts is just miserable... if they absolutely have to read for school, then at least give them something that doesn't feel like a chore...
Instead of acting like we should all be standing in awe of Aesop's fables like they're some kind of revolutionary masterpiece!!

It all traces back to us parents. It’s an inevitable part of growing up—they develop their own little world, one where we aren't the center of the universe anymore, specifically when they step out into society.
How much they soak up from the culture versus what they learn at home really varies from kid to kid, but I firmly believe that most issues can be smoothed over simply through honest conversation.
To be perfectly blunt, I just cannot wrap my head around parents who see a glaring problem right in front of them and choose to look the other way.
That kind of denial does nothing but sabotage that child's future.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with putting your own mental health first and, of course, getting the kid into therapy; none of us were born knowing everything there is to know about the world.
I certainly wish I had all the answers, but let’s face it, I don't.
It’s actually quite humbling—and a bit frustrating—how often I catch myself saying something, only to realize I'm just echoing the exact words my own parents used to say.

I won't sit here and lecture anyone on my own parenting choices, but I can certainly comment from the sidelines when I observe other parents dealing with kids around the same age as my little girl.
Not only is physical punishment completely ineffective, but it actually breeds this deep-seated defiance in children; they end up acting like stubborn mules who are just conditioned to take a beating, which is honestly terrifying to witness.
It’s even worse when I see parents getting into these "deeply philosophical" arguments with their toddlers, only for the whole thing to spiral into a screaming match where the kid is wailing at the top of their lungs while the parent just yells, "Get to your room!"—it truly makes my stomach turn.
But then again, the foundation was never laid correctly to begin with, and as time goes on, the situation just keeps deteriorating.
It is a total disaster, and I find myself constantly on edge in an environment like that, just waiting for someone to snap and lash out; it’s a complete catastrophe.
And unfortunately, there are far too many instances of this happening, or at least from what I've seen in my own circles.
When the older folks lose their minds, they sometimes turn to me and say, "Hey Charles Murphy6, give us some sage advice—your little one seems fine," yet they absolutely refuse to listen to a single word I say. Not one word.
My husband just gets a kick out of it whenever he sees me wasting my breath on people who clearly aren't interested in changing.

To answer that—no, I don’t sit her down for lectures. Honestly, who would actually sit through one? I certainly wouldn't.
Instead, I just use real-life examples to show her when something isn't right, and we wrap it up in five minutes flat.
And no, I didn't immediately call her out on it.
I let us both catch our breath first, and then we had our talk.
God, if people actually knew her, they'd probably just say she does whatever I want because, frankly, I usually have a "perfect child" on my hands—one that's incredibly easy to raise. I've mentioned before that we've never had any major blowouts; there have only been a few times where I've had to step in and correct her.
But this whole situation feels like a massive shift for me.
Like when she pulls something like this🙄.
🤣
I'm just not used to it.
I tell her, "Oh, honey, we have such a high ceiling in this house that your ego might just hit it."😁
She doesn't pull that stunt during serious talks, but rather when I ask her to do something and she's just being particularly stubborn...
Disobedience? Hmm... I haven't quite figured out how to define that yet because we haven't reached that stage, and honestly, I don't even know if we ever will.
The truth is that foundations are built when they are little, and I still firmly believe that I've laid down some solid ground.
Damica still respects me. I can see it, and I can hear it. Thank God for that. However, I am starting to see this other side of her growing up, where she acts incredibly arrogant toward others—the kind of behavior that usually stems from being hurt herself in the past—and I'm trying to work through that with her.
She recently tried a little tactic with her stepfather, but since he isn't her biological father, she didn't take it out on him directly; she directed it at me after he asked her to do something.
We had a very serious conversation about that, because let's be real: even though he isn't her dad, he gives her everything he has, and she knows it full well—but she's testing the boundaries, testing the terrain, thinking if she pushes just enough, she might get away with it.
On top of all that, the kid is an absolute psychological mastermind, truly. She'll pull some random situation out of thin air where I once gave her advice, and then throw it back in my face the moment I start getting carried away... at that point, all I can do is hide my face or cover my ears. :-))

The penalties don't mean a damn thing to me—considering I haven't even been penalized myself, so thanks for that input.🙂
I was being ironic when I mentioned stifling her creativity—honestly, that was never even on the table.😉
And apparently, you’ve been eavesdropping on us too, haven't you?😁
I did exactly what you instructed me to do... no, I am not feeding her empty platitudes, believe me, that hasn't even crossed my mind.
Tears are perfectly acceptable in our household. Being emotional is fine. But this is one of those situations where she thinks shedding tears means I’ll just wrap her in a hug and call it a day without actually talking, and she almost always starts screaming along with the crying whenever we try to have these kinds of discussions. That said, I don't forbid her from crying (though I'm not quite sure how I would even manage that), but I absolutely will not tolerate the screaming.
Thanks again. The whole concept of penalties is totally off. That’s what I thought anyway, but hey, I have this forum, so I ask.😉
She has never once been defiant toward me before. I simply want to teach her how to be a young lady who actually thinks about her actions. It's just like you said—when someone truly hurts her, she becomes incredibly distraught.

I had quite the "clash" today. She was incredibly rude to this little girl, and while I usually try to stay out of it, my daughter often comes home absolutely distraught because someone hurt her feelings.
What I realized when I sat her down to talk is that her ultimate weapon is the waterworks. Pure, unadulterated manipulation through tears.😁
Then, amidst all the sobbing, she starts loudly justifying herself, practically shouting at me.
It made me realize how much I refuse to raise my voice. I stay calm, avoiding any histrionics, and when she starts escalating, I just calmly ask, "Am I yelling?" And just like that, she’s defeated...😛
My husband was eavesdropping on our conversation today and told me I handled it perfectly.
I’m done falling for the tears. Tears are just a precursor to hysterics, and frankly, neither of us needs that drama. Instead, she just sits there, acting like the center of the universe, while I talk and talk and talk...
The thing is, you never truly know if they’re actually listening to you.🤣
I wonder, what were we like? My parents claim they didn't even notice my teenage rebellion phase. Honestly, I have no idea. I know for a fact I was never disrespectful toward them.
Now, I have a question for you all. When I find myself in a situation where I need to issue some kind of punishment for disobedience, what should I actually take away? It’s not about computer time or her phone. She just stares at the TV...
She loves photography and all sorts of creative crafts. How can I even justify taking those away? I feel completely lost here because I haven't really dealt with outright defiance before, but I can see it coming...
What should I do?
Should I stop taking her to the park? That feels ridiculous. I'm honestly stuck wondering if I should implement light punishments or if I should just keep talking and talking...
For now, I'm sticking to the old-school method of constant lecturing, hoping something finally sticks in that head of hers.