Posts by Noah Fowler3

It’s all just bribes and corruption. ☕

Matthew Castillo5 said:Something for Toxic.

And I was just about to bring you an incredible gift. 🙂

Ashley Vaughn79 said:10.11. What's the single biggest mistake a parent can make when raising a child?

Or maybe it's a combination of things...

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This topic was pulled from the 86. post within the topic of the day.

The biggest blunder parents make is treating their kids as if they are somehow less important. Saying things like, "You're just a kid, you'll understand when you're older," or, "Your teacher is going to hear about this, how could she give you a D in math?"

Most parents end up doing more harm than good. They don't realize they're hurting them by essentially putting them under a "glass bell jar."

Maybe the best example of this unfair dynamic is asking a kid how their day went, while simultaneously expecting them to spill everything. Then, when the kid asks you the exact same thing back, you just give a one-word answer instead of actually engaging.

Just remember. Kids often have a much more developed sense of non-verbal communication than most adults do.

ruggedscout76 said:We spend our best years chasing the perfect partner and the ideal circumstances, believing if we just collect enough of these "right" pieces, everything will click; yet, the more you hunt for perfection, the harder the fall when you realize how many of those components were actually wrong all along. 🐔

Or perhaps there is no such thing as right or wrong, only what you desire and what brings you a sense of peace in the moment 🕺

That's the only real answer.

When you finally meet "the one," you marry them. Simple as that.

It lasts as long as it lasts. Life keeps moving, and paths cross and diverge. Sometimes people just drift apart at those crossroads.

There isn't much point in overthinking it.

😳

Sent from my Galaxy Note20 using Reddit

This thread belongs in a different section.

The issue isn't the server itself. It’s the outdated forum software and poor database maintenance. Every bit of lag we're seeing comes down to slow database read speeds.

It’s actually pretty wild when you think about it—that a site this amateurishly built has somehow stayed online for 20 years. 😁

I'm not trying to judge anyone here. 🤣

But hey, keep doing what you're doing. Even if we've covered this topic on this board before, it can always come up again. 😁

Sent from my Galaxy Note20 Ultra via Reddit

Rachel Richardson said:So, what's the verdict? If I write too much, I'm the problem; if I write too little, I'm also the problem?

Look, Noah, this isn't a private chat room. If you actually want to engage in a discussion, common courtesy dictates that you at least read the comments first.
The way you're acting makes it seem like anyone who doesn't echo your exact sentiment is somehow "suffocating" you.
And frankly, that would be a rather pathetic way to live.

On that note, let me ask you something: when was the last time you actually contributed something intelligent to that PDF?
When did you ever start a meaningful thread or offer a single valuable insight?
In what way has your presence actually made this forum a better place?

How long have you even been on this forum? How do you still not know the basics? As the person who started this thread, I have every right to steer the conversation where I intended, provided the moderation doesn't decide the thread has lost its purpose. 🤷 Your posts are exhausting and completely unconstructive—which explains why you ended up with those partial bans... If you keep this up, I’ll keep reporting your posts and flagging you, so if you want to stay in this conversation, I suggest you start being helpful...

I'll answer your questions by asking you one: do you take toddlers in preschool seriously? No, you don't, right?
I don't want to stoop below a certain level, but I read threads on this forum whenever I can stand it, even though most of them are bottom-tier. That's why I'm complaining—because there's nothing worth saying and it's painful to read. 🤷 The forum today isn't what it used to be. ☕

And you're just one of those problematic users who pushes a communication style that's nowhere near the standard you claim to uphold. How exactly are you adding quality to these discussions? Have you changed your tone since the partial bans? Of course not. ☕

@Wikipedia, please, spare us your walls of text. They suffocate the thread and they're exhausting to read. You do this in the forum threads too.

Ashley Vaughn79 said:Well, that was exactly my point.

If the mod isn't working?
Fine, make a suggestion and back it up with reasons why you think someone else would be better.

Silence. 😬

In the professional world, I've always felt that pointing out problems without offering any solutions is pretty pointless. Sorry, not sorry.

No, Ashley. I didn't say the mod is bad, just that they haven't actually started working. New threads are a reflection of how a moderator operates. I started two new threads and asked if you were okay with how they were being moderated. Silence. 😬

I also provided solutions:
1. Stop the constant attacks in the chat room
2. Moderate new threads properly
3. Gradually steer old threads back on track

What exactly about those suggestions isn't constructive?

Lawrence Phillips said:Just because you start a thread doesn't mean you're actually starting a discussion.
Seriously, people keep digging up these old, dead topics, but then the people reviving them can barely string together more than three coherent words. It’s kind of ridiculous, honestly.

Most of the time, these threads get bumped with nothing but an "interesting topic..." or just a random smiley face.👍

Rachel Richardson... I mean, let's be real, those 100,000 posts of yours probably aren't all the result of deep, constructive debates.
I'm not saying you don't have smart things to say—not at all!—but you definitely contribute quite heavily to this whole half-baked way of communicating. It just creates these endless, messy loops that never seem to resolve, which makes everything such a chore to read, especially considering what the actual topic was supposed to be about.

All this chatter happening inside specific threads feels way more suited for a chat room rather than a forum where threads should actually have a clear point and flow.

You're basically participating in and fueling these "debates" that aren't even really debates at all.

Maybe take a look at the posts in the adult sections below the chat room? Then tell me if you see any actual, productive conversation happening there.

I sign off on everything said here.

Jacob Alvarez said:@ user_name:
Honestly, that's a rigged question. If you were running a local diner and, because some rude waitress gave you a hard time, you sent the owner a list of "better" candidates to replace her, they’d think you were losing it.
I have zero clue how the moderator selection process actually works. I don't know what the criteria are. Besides, there’s no proof that regular users' opinions even matter here, so why bother? 🤷

But hey, your posts are actually useful because they highlight the fact that administration clearly struggles with picking the right people. It's obvious—they just can't get it right. It's not on us. They just aren't capable of putting a decent person in that role. That's a pretty important takeaway too (that filing final appeals is basically pointless).

The way they’re picking new moderators is definitely problematic. It feels like they're just looking for people who act exactly like them.

Lawrence Phillips said:When you aren't being insulted, you're getting criticized by the moderation team.
It all kicked off because someone was trying to test out how strict things are using GIFs. It’s not even about the GIFs themselves—it’s more about the principle of the thing. But hey, if the admins decide GIFs are banned (even though they weren't an issue just a little while ago), then fine, no GIFs. Period.

Honestly, my time spent having actual, constructive debates on this forum is pretty much over—mostly because there are so few people left here I can actually have a decent conversation with.
Every single thread gets absolutely spammed with trolls, hate speech, and xenophobia almost immediately... it's just exhausting. And the constant fighting? Man, it wears me down, I just don't have the energy for it anymore. I'd much rather just hop into a chat room, hash things out properly, and move on with my day.

If I could say one thing to the moderator, it would be to maybe tighten up the discipline a bit. Like, maybe steer the good discussions back on track and just shut down those vague, repetitive threads right at the start.
Maybe then the whole place might actually breathe enough for someone to *want* to write something meaningful again. Until then, I'll pass.

Anyway, that's my two cents. I'm done with this thread.

I'd like someone to point out exactly where we insulted the moderator, or where any of us said they should be removed or that their time shouldn't be given.

Richard Nelson84 said:Explicit GIFs have never been allowed on this forum. We dealt with that exact same issue back when I was a moderator.

Example2
Example2

It makes zero sense to let forum members nominate moderators. If we actually started picking mods based on user suggestions, you’d just end up right back here in the PZK or the ban corner, complaining that the new mod is biased and only looking out for the people who voted them in!

Let’s be real: managing this forum isn't exactly a walk in the park. A new moderator needs some breathing room to find their footing. If we can give a new administration or the President a 100-day grace period to settle in, we can certainly afford to give our new moderator the same courtesy! 😬

If you want this forum to actually stay moderated properly, start reporting every single controversial post you see. That is hands down the best way to make it happen!

Richard Nelson84, you really stepped up your discipline once you took over moderation. Before that, we had those GIFs enabled for an entire year. That loophole is exactly why that 18+ PDF was even able to get posted. I’ll never understand why everyone just moved on from it. The explanations never added up, so honestly, I'm leaning toward believing this was your doing.

Look, please don't just go around reporting things blindly. What am I supposed to do, report 10,000 posts? Go take a look at the threads. They aren't even opened properly. Would you have left those kinds of threads open? And what is the point of having the PZK if we’re expected to report every single one of those 10,000 posts individually? 🤷

ruggedscout76 said:You used the word "polite."🙂

That said, I find myself agreeing with much of what you've said. Moderation isn't nearly as straightforward as it appears on the surface. Some users have become quite settled on the forum during the period without moderators, and it takes time to re-establish order. For every thread resolved, three more pop up while everyone tries to gauge what is actually permitted. When there were no mods, everything just slipped through, and many took advantage of that freedom. Now, we're dealing with the fallout in the form of a crowd of trolls who made themselves at home. However, if the moderation remains consistent, they'll eventually lose interest and move on.

P.s. I miss the GIFs too.🕺

I actually used "really polite." 🙂

What bothers me most is the new threads that aren't even readable. Again, Alexander Gray2 needed to handle that better, and he still can. It's harder to enforce order on threads that are already running full steam, I'll give you that. But just like how he stepped up in the chat room, he can do it in those threads too. It's not rocket science. 🤷

We'll get GIFs back. This is the third time they've banned them, only for them to realize later that the PDF isn't indexed by Google. 🙂

Ashley Vaughn79 said:To me, it isn't even about how they were raised; it's just pure ego.
Mixing ego with moderation is a dangerous combination.

Add some complexes into the mix, too.

Man, what a total mess that creates. 😬

I don't buy the ego argument. People with high self-esteem have big egos because they actually believe in what they do. They stay steady. Sure, they mess up—we all do—but they stay consistent and you can actually learn from their standards.

I do agree on the insecurities part. Any combination of complexes is a bad move.

Paul Martin8 said:Because they don't actually have a single decent suggestion to offer🙄

They just sit there criticizing... as if saying "give it some time" solves anything.
The forum was left completely unsupervised, which basically turned it into a magnet for everything nasty.
From total idiots to those mindless trolls who exist just to cause trouble.
Oh sure, let's just give the new manager more time before we start whining again. Is that the plan?
My suggestion? Maybe give him some actual help, because cleaning up this mess takes time, and I'm assuming he has a life outside of this and can't—or doesn't want to—be glued to the forum 24/7.

p.s. the rule about GIFs is absolute garbage🙂

It says right there that we should give him time, but new threads definitely need better moderation...

And obviously, he needs help.

ruggedscout76 said:Toxic, we can probably just agree to disagree on this one. 🙂

In my view, a moderator really ought to maintain a level of decency toward everyone, or at least as much as their patience allows. It’s entirely possible to be firm and consistent without losing your manners; frankly, it's just a matter of how one was raised. If you possess the "power" to issue a warning or a ban—to effectively remove someone from the forum—and yet still feel the need to be rude to them in the process, then I suspect you lack the character required to actually "dispense justice."

You didn't quite catch the point I was making..

The point is that a ban should be the absolute last resort.

Why do you think being assertive equals being rude?

Ashley Vaughn79 said:I didn't mean to trivialize it, believe me.

If I understood you, and if I personally hated the main forum rules because they weren't to my liking, I’d probably be jumping down administration's throats and blowing up their inboxes (not that it matters, I assume they're already used to 😬 ).

But am I really the only one who thinks the issue isn't so much about the new moderator, but rather that the forum is such a massive community that it spent a period without any moderation at all?
It makes sense that trolls spread during those times, and you can't just fix that overnight. Especially when it's just one person who likely has a real life outside of this.
That's how I see it.

At the same time, besides the expressed dissatisfaction here (whether justified or not—I'm not getting into that, since I haven't been following the forum actively this week), I haven't seen a single reasoned suggestion with a specific name for someone you think would be a better moderator than the current one.

Emily Brown81 showed up just to troll and someone actually supported her... wow.
That doesn't count. 😬

It's easier to take that route.

Alright, the floor is yours. 🤷
Post your suggestions for additional moderators along with arguments as to why that specific person should be chosen and why you think they'd be better than the current mod. Don't be difficult and don't nominate yourselves; that's the only rule.
We can discuss hypothetically, why not?

Why is everyone silent now? 😬

(I've shared my own suggestions and reasoning whenever I felt it was necessary... at least I made an effort to think things through.) 🙂

And yes, I will always favor lighter moderation over a dictatorial approach.
Personally, I'm quite glad I haven't had to deal with user_name in a moderation capacity.
I imagine I'd be handing out a ton of bans today. 😁

It’s not about me having a grudge against the moderator—I’m really not that kind of person. It’s just that none of the threads on this forum are actually readable anymore. I took a look at Alexander Gray2's posts, and where exactly was he standing his ground? I can't even remember the last time there wasn't an issue in the chat room. It honestly frustrates me, especially when I see how he handles other threads. I at least expect him to direct new topics properly, but I linked two new threads where you can clearly see nothing has been done. Are those two threads actually readable to you?

Look, that's a massive file, which is exactly why I said we need to bring on another moderator. There's really no excuse for why the threads haven't been cleaned up yet—especially since "real life" isn't a valid reason here. If someone accepts those responsibilities, they should actually follow through.

I'm not going to suggest anyone for moderator. I want to be able to praise them if they do a good job, but I also need the freedom to call them out if they don't. If I recommend someone, I lose my right to criticize. Plus, any praise I give later would just look biased—everyone would say, "Of course he's praising them, he's the one who picked them."

user_name isn't some kind of dictator. I’ve taken plenty of warnings from him myself. I earned them. For instance, user_name gave me a partial ban once. It doesn't change the fact that both of them did exactly what moderators are supposed to do. Back when user_name was around, I spent a ton of time reading this forum. I'm sure a lot of others did too.

ruggedscout76 said:Even if I grant you that point, it doesn't change the core of her question: how do we actually identify and select someone capable of moderating? In theory, yes, high activity isn't a requirement, but our only real metric for evaluation is forum engagement and the assessment based on that participation. 🤷

I’m not trying to be provocative; I am genuinely asking, especially since we all remember how difficult it was to find moderators for this forum, and quite frankly, there was a very good reason for that struggle.

user_name knows exactly why I told her that, and I'm not planning on sharing that here.

Generally speaking, you can spot a moderator by how they react to certain situations.

Specifically, look at how they communicate with others. I'm not talking about being polite or "nice," but about assertiveness. A moderator needs to shut down undesirable behavior immediately, and sometimes that means they can't always be pleasant to everyone. You don't need more than a thousand posts to get a sense of whether someone fits that mold.

Tenure on the forum matters because you need to understand what worked and what didn't in the past. An ideal moderator should probably be active for at least three years. That way, they won't come in and change rules on the forum just because it seems logical to them, only to clash with the established habits of the community.

I honestly don't know why it took so long to find a moderator for this forum; I can't see anything in the moderation logs. ☕ And I don't see a reason for the delay either. It's better to make a decision—even if it's the wrong one—than to drag things out indefinitely.

It wasn't a mistake giving Alexander Gray2 a chance. I'm not against him, but he needs to start doing what moderators are actually supposed to do: steer discussions in the right direction. Right now, it doesn't even feel like there's a moderator present on the forum.

Ashley Vaughn79 said:Just for the sake of a hypothetical discussion... who would you suggest for an additional moderator on the forum?

I guess you could pick 3, 4, or 5 names... maybe add some relatively constructive arguments as to why those specific people. 🙂

I guess they might let us do this. 😬
I guess we've had similar hypothetical debates on the forum before.

Ashley Vaughn79, please don't trivialize the situation.

Being a mod isn't about how much someone posts, whether they participate in every single thread, or if they write beautifully. user_name and user_name are prototypes of what a good moderator should be.
If it isn't clear what I mean—it's about the ability to spot problematic posts (as user_name puts it, Wikipedia-style), and having the necessary calm to guide users in a heated debate toward cooling down, or seeing when they go too far and need a warning or a ban.

That’s the main reason we haven't had a permanent moderator on the US forum since user_name left. They haven't found that balance where a little bit of energy actually solves the issues. Instead, they just get overwhelmed.

The state of things on this forum is such that my small contribution could fix the entire sub-section in a week, which means things are in really bad shape.

Honestly, what can I say about the survival of this exhausted, poorly managed thread?
https://www.example-forum.com/showthread.php?t=1220331
Of course the thread devolved into total trolling...

In fact, that's become the standard way of opening threads on the forum lately.
https://www.example-forum.com/showthread.php?t=1220417

rustydrifter10, the situation is still critical...

Lawrence Phillips said:I mean, looking back, people have shared a few GIFs in the chat room over the years—but, you know, within reasonable limits! It was always done with the old-school moderation's okay, and we made sure to post them as links rather than direct images. I guess Google wasn't breathing down our necks back then?

Anyway, whatever. If it’s the rule, it’s the rule.
We'll follow it. And hey, I still stand by everything else I said earlier.

Just keep your private hookups out of the public threads. People used to do it before, and it was handled just fine back then.

That’s the main point. Honestly, the current moderator hasn't done much regarding this issue, which is exactly why I started this thread.

rustydrifter10, leave the GIFs alone for now and focus on the actual issues. All this GIF business feels like people are just trying to look busy while the real problems get swept under the rug. That's not good. The forum chat room doesn't even need moderation because users police themselves, and Google can't see that PDF anyway.

Also, find another moderator. This forum isn't some tiny little file that one beginner can manage on their own.

Ashley Vaughn79 said:It doesn't look too bad to me, I guess.

He'll moderate once he arrives; nobody is really active on the forum anyway.

I really don't see any change. 🤷

Just imagine if Phish were moderating. What would this place even look like?

Jacob Alvarez said:Depends on how you define "moderation."
If you ask me? Nothing's actually getting better.

There’s zero evidence of progress.

But... nobody smart jumps in to start changing things immediately. They'll watch first. They'll take note of what works and what doesn't. Then, after a while, they'll try the worst approach, then wait a bit longer before trying again..

So, let's give him until the end of the year before we judge his performance. 🍿

Sent from my Galaxy Note20 Ultra using Reddit

The new moderator is still finding their footing..

Let's give them a little more breathing room before we start complaining about how they handle things. 🙂

rustydrifter10 said:They deserve an A, but we're barely pulling a C. 🙂

Tell the boss to stop being so cheap.

Better investment leads to better returns. It's simple math. 🙂

Sent from my Galaxy Note10 using Reddit

https://www.vbulletin.org/forum/showthread.php?t=325583

rustydrifter10, you owe me one.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy Note20 using Reddit

Alright, good luck with the new mod. 🎉

No time for celebrating, though. I’ve got a PDF to clean up. ☕🙂

First task on the list: renaming Hazel and the chat. 😁

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