Topic of the day: What's the ideal age to get married?

03/23. What are the ideal ages to get married?

Is there actually an ideal age, or is it entirely up to the individual?
Does marriage even matter to you, or do you see it as just a formality?

What is your motivation for wanting to get married?

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This topic was pulled from the 105th post of the topic of the day.

It works if people are down for it, and obviously, even better when they actually find someone they want to be with.

Ideally, hitting those milestones by thirty is great—you get your career, kids, and everything else sorted. By the time you hit your 40s, the kids are older, you've got more freedom, and you still have enough energy to chase after grandkids.

I honestly think your 20s are the absolute sweet spot—you know, while you're still out there grinding, building your career and figuring out who you are, that's when you should be building a life with someone else.
It feels like everyone nowadays is just... waiting. They’re waiting to hit some milestone, or land that big promotion, or finally feel "ready," and they keep pushing everything off until the connection just sort of fades away and things fall apart.

To be totally honest, at this stage in my life, marriage isn't even the main focus for me—it just feels like a formality, if that makes sense.

I suppose the right time to get married is whenever the idea actually crosses someone's mind.

The reasons behind this are far more mundane than one might expect—certainly nothing poetic. First off, unless you belong to that specific group of people who view marriage as a singular, once-in-a-lifetime event, it isn't necessarily an unbreakable bond that ties two people together forever—well, at least not in the way most imagine. That kind of permanent link only really happens through parenthood. Whether a person wants it or not, they remain tethered to their child's other parent for life.

The second reason is simply the reality that the legal system here in the States makes divorce relatively quick and straightforward. It allows two people who realize they aren't right for each other to end a misguided marriage without jumping through impossible hoops. Granted, if they were traditionalists, they wouldn't be able to go back to a church for a second attempt, but then again, those folks are usually the ones who believe in that "forever" concept anyway—so I guess these points don't even apply to them.

So you're seriously talking about divorce, just like that? ☕

I wouldn't say I have all the answers, but I am speaking specifically about the American state and its legal framework.

stormygull36 said:I honestly think your 20s are the absolute sweet spot—you know, while you're still out there grinding, building your career and figuring out who you are, that's when you should be building a life with someone else.
It feels like everyone nowadays is just... waiting. They’re waiting to hit some milestone, or land that big promotion, or finally feel "ready," and they keep pushing everything off until the connection just sort of fades away and things fall apart.

To be totally honest, at this stage in my life, marriage isn't even the main focus for me—it just feels like a formality, if that makes sense.

That’s pretty much my take on it...
meaning, 27—maybe 30 at the absolute most.

After living together successfully for a while now.
Not before you hit thirty.

Hitting my thirties

At what point are both parties truly ready to commit to marriage, regardless of how many years have passed? ☕

If you consider having kids a fundamental part of marriage, then thirty is probably the upper limit, in my opinion. If that isn't the goal, however, the timeline matters much less; you could tie the knot at fifty and it wouldn't change the equation.

Hmm, maybe next time. 😉

The last few haven't really been anything special.

Ashley Vaughn79 said:03/23. What are the ideal ages to get married?

Is there actually an ideal age, or is it entirely up to the individual?
Does marriage even matter to you, or do you see it as just a formality?

What is your motivation for wanting to get married?

__________________________________
This topic was pulled from the 105th post of the topic of the day.

Once you finish school—I finished at 24—you really ought to enjoy yourself for at least five years. That was my experience with my ex-husband. After college, we were out hitting concerts, going on weekend trips, and skiing all over the place until we finally got burnt out and decided we wanted to settle down and start a family.🍿

For me, the sweet spot for marriage is around 30. That’s when I did it, and it worked out fine.☕

However, looking back on my marriage now, I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. Relationships aren't always meant to be forever. If you're with someone, you should stay because you want to, not because you signed some legal document with the government thinking it acts as some kind of guarantee for love. Give me a break! 🐔 Once someone starts acting entitled, they know they have you in their grip just because of that paperwork.

If I ever do it again, we won't be signing anything. We'll just head to a beach and exchange vows privately. No crowds, just the sound of the waves, sand under our feet, the sky, and the seagulls as our witnesses. We'll love each other for as long as our love lasts.🙂

You really think someone’s got leverage over you just because you signed that paper?
Honestly, I guess it's more likely people are held hostage by shared assets, mortgages... whatever.

Ashley Vaughn79 said:03/23. What are the ideal ages to get married?

Is there actually an ideal age, or is it entirely up to the individual?
Does marriage even matter to you, or do you see it as just a formality?

What is your motivation for wanting to get married?

__________________________________
This topic was pulled from the 105th post of the topic of the day.

It's completely and utterly down to the individual.
Next topic of the day: What's your favorite color and why isn't it green?

Three years after saying "I do" on a beach somewhere, you find that partners hold onto each other—or let go—just as much as those who have already tied the knot legally.

Walter Davis said:You really think someone’s got leverage over you just because you signed that paper?
Honestly, I guess it's more likely people are held hostage by shared assets, mortgages... whatever.

The truth is, a signature carries weight. You sign those documents, and then during every argument, there's that nagging thought in the back of your mind—that you can't just walk away. It leaves you feeling stuck.

Once you're married, you aren't just signing marriage licenses; you're signing mortgage papers, car loans, and all sorts of financial commitments.

That's where the real disaster happens. You go through a divorce, but you're still stuck paying off a massive loan for years to come.

One thing that really matters to me when I'm looking at a woman is if she just isn't interested in getting married. 🤣
No marriage, no kids, no drama. 🤣

You’re citing the wrong examples here.

Even a joint loan has absolutely nothing to do with whether someone joined in or made some sort of verbal pledge.

Who knows. I ended up getting married at 20, so clearly, the timing just wasn't right. Though, I suppose the bigger issue was that he just wasn't the right man for me 🤣 but I guess even the best of us make mistakes, so what can you do now? 😁