Posts by coppermarlin14

Richard Perez3 said:Screw the day bread.

🙂😁😁 I suppose I should ask, what exactly happened with the day bread celebrations?

Michelle Nelson4 said:Well, my actual concern would be a school play where they expect children to "cross themselves when necessary," simply because my kids don't have anything to cross themselves for. Fortunately, there wasn't a priest present during the end-of-semester religious song program, though one did show up for the "Bread Day" event—which resulted in my child skipping it altogether. I'm perfectly fine with that, honestly, since those types of things feel like a religious ritual being pushed under the guise of a general appreciation for nature.

I’ve never really tried to force anything on anyone... I simply told my little girl that if she ever felt like participating, she could. When her religion teacher visited the classroom for introductions, she made it clear that she isn't interested... and doesn't want to be.
We celebrate Christmas by having Santa Claus bring gifts, and that’s pretty much it... we decorate the tree in early December and take it down by the end of January. For Easter, we dye eggs... that’s the extent of it.
If someone wants to participate, they can... but I don't feel the need for anything deeper than that.
My child grew so tired of the religious education classes and the constant pressure to go to church that he actually withdrew from the program this year.
The biggest impact seems to have been that confession ceremony... from what I can see, it left him feeling very unsettled. It didn't make sense to him, and he didn't understand what he was supposed to be "confessing" there. He actually asked me if he could just do whatever he wanted, then go confess, and consider everything forgiven.🤦
I don't know, I just don't care for these kinds of things... the worst part is seeing people sitting in the front rows of the church... it's honestly a bit distasteful... most of the gossip starts right before they even leave the building... it’s just unpleasant.
It never occurs to me to try and impose my views on anyone else... everyone has their own path.
I have no desire to attend church... it just feels wrong to me.
I told my husband quite plainly that it never crossed his mind to suggest bringing a priest to me when I pass away... not once.
He used to be a believer, but now he doesn't attend church either.
I’ve never been a religious person myself... and while my parents were, they never forced it on us.

My kids absolutely love religion class... mainly because they don't actually have to attend it. 😂

We celebrate Christmas and I believe in God... I just don't have any desire to sit in a church pew listening to people spout nonsense. I don't really buy into the idea that God only exists within those four walls. Plus, I’m not interested in handing over my hard-earned money just so priests and clergy can live in luxury. I don't think my life will magically improve if I force my children to go to service, and I certainly don't want them sitting there being fed all sorts of baseless claims. To be honest, they aren't interested either. My youngest was attending until the fifth grade, but he eventually decided to opt out himself because he just couldn't stand listening to the absurdity of it all. Even though I bought him the textbooks, he refuses to touch them. I actually have some fifth-grade religious education books sitting around; if anyone needs them, I'd be happy to sell them for half price.

I don't mind the holiday plays or celebrations surrounding Christmas and Easter... the kids can cross themselves when it's appropriate.

I don't feel any personal need for my child to receive the sacraments, but my husband does, so he’s the one handling all of that... not me!
Personally, I don't have an issue with it as long as my child isn't being forced into it. It never really occurred to me to attend those pre-communion meetings myself...
I’ve simply shared my own experience, and that's that. You all can continue your own research into how things work if you wish... A question was asked for an opinion, so I gave mine based on how I actually experienced things during those years of religious education. To be honest, I haven't the slightest clue what they even teach in those classes because I’ve just never been interested... it always seemed incredibly tedious and uninspiring to me...
My little girl would go to religious ed if she actually expressed an interest in it, but she hasn't... She was at church with her father for the first time, and she found it boring; she kept sweetly begging me not to make her go... I decided to listen to her. If she had wanted to go, I wouldn't have stood in her way, just as I don't try to control everything a small child does...

As for me, I was baptized when I was just an infant... They wanted me to take my First Communion and Confirmation later on, but I didn't want to. In my eyes, there was nothing interesting to be found there. And now, imagine—I am married in the eyes of the church without having had those sacraments. Quite something, isn't it? Honestly, I didn't even want to get married at all; I wanted to live a more bohemian, free-spirited life. But my husband fell in love with me, and I fell for him, so I agreed to marry him for the sake of love. Truthfully, I was just counting down the days until that whole pro*** was over.

As you can see, none of this interests me, but I certainly don't want to deny anyone else something they feel they need... just because we don't share the same views. Everyone finds their own happiness... if someone enjoys it, more power to them.

And to northerncobra27, please stop insulting me and my child by suggesting what she might learn from me... maybe you should ask yourself what your own children will learn from you, especially since you actually have the option to choose.☕
Because my child certainly does!

northerncobra27 said:Given how much conformity we run into in our day-to-day lives across America, I’m not entirely sure why it surprises you to see it surfacing in a topic like this. And really, it isn't strictly about just following the crowd. It’s more complicated than that. You can't simply leave a seven-year-old unsupervised for two hours every week; while you're busy fighting against social conformity, you might have one kid sitting lonely in a hallway and another wandering off somewhere entirely unexpected...

Now, I’m not a believer myself, but I do understand the significance of Mass within a faith community. That’s why it really gets under my skin when I hear people complaining about having to take their child to Mass. If a child is preparing for First Communion or Confirmation, Sunday Mass should naturally become a part of their life. If attending Mass is such a monumental burden in your household, why on earth are you signing them up for these sacraments in the first place? We should probably take a moment to reflect on our own stances and consider what kind of example we are setting for our children. Any bad influence they encounter in a religious ed class can be corrected later, but the negative lessons they learn from us tend to take much deeper root..

I don't have any issue with anyone; I’m an open-minded person and I respect everyone's choices... which is exactly why I allowed my child to attend religious education and everything else, and why I tolerate my husband's views... 😂
But I absolutely will not tolerate using intimidation against a child by saying, "We’re going to pull you out of the program and you won't receive your sacraments if you don't show up for Mass or class." It breaks my heart to see a child who has been up all night taking Ventolin and struggling with a fever, crying because they feel forced to go to church just to avoid being kicked out of the group...👎 They don't realize that these people are essentially brainwashing them by forcing their hand... they don't understand that the child is actually sick and physically cannot go... they just cry because they are terrified of the consequences of missing a service...🙄
That is why I want to withdraw them from religious education now; I don't want them going through the motions for a Confirmation that isn't even happening for another year...
And what has all this achieved? All it does is result in fewer kids attending classes and, eventually, fewer kids receiving the sacraments altogether....

Is this really what people think about yoga? 😂
I was honestly stunned when a friend of mine—someone I thought was a pretty progressive, modern young woman—started spouting some absolute nonsense regarding yoga. I mean, seriously, I’m still trying to process it... she goes to church and is a believer, yet she actually had the nerve to ask me if I was worried about someone casting a hex or a curse on me just by buying secondhand clothes online. I couldn't believe my ears. It was just... well, it was ridiculous. 😂

It’s the same story with the local parish. Ever since the kids reached third grade, it’s been constant involvement in church activities... especially from the mid-year onwards. They hold these meetings for the parents that drag on for at least an hour and a half—honestly, longer than most parent-teacher conferences at the local elementary school. And do you know what they spend all that time debating? How to raise children. You have priests and nuns showing up and telling *me* how I should be raising my own kids...
I never actually attended those meetings myself; I just sent my husband because he wanted to participate in the religious education programs. I told him, "Fine, you go, I'm staying home."
The pressure on the kids is relentless, too. They’re constantly being threatened that if they don't show up for Mass or the religious classes, they won't be allowed to receive Communion, or they might even be kicked out of the program entirely.
And apparently, if you want them to take their First Communion, they have to be enrolled in those religious studies at both school and the church for two full years beforehand.

It’s not that complicated. You either walk into a church and then leave... or you just don't go at all. 🤣

I wouldn't say I'm an atheist, per se... but I have my doubts about the clergy in the church. I mean, if God is everywhere, why do I need to physically step inside a building to find Him? 👎
I struggle with the superstitions and rituals people cling to, especially when so many self-proclaimed devout followers believe in those kinds of things while simultaneously claiming they only believe in God and nothing else... or suggesting that if you just have enough faith, nothing bad will ever happen to you. It makes me wonder what kind of believers they actually are. ☕

I really enjoy decorating the tree and putting gifts underneath it... honestly, that's the best part for me.
I’m not a huge fan of dyeing eggs, though I’ll do it because the kids can be quite persistent; I’ll go through the motions, but I don't do anything overly dramatic for Easter.
I do love the general atmosphere during Christmas, though... that's when I feel most at home. But I don't attend midnight mass or go to church, and I don't really pray. Visiting a church just doesn't feel right to me. My husband would prefer if I joined him, but that's just not something I want to do. 😒

To be honest, when I see how many people head to church, I just see so much hypocrisy... it's everywhere. And the worst part is that the most hypocritical people are usually the first ones there. I just don't want any part of that.

swiftstag14 said:This is my first time posting here, and I honestly wasn't sure if I should even 😁
My son is starting first grade, and during enrollment, they asked about religious education. Should we say yes or no?
We chose yes, but even now—just like so many times before—I find myself questioning if we made the right call. To give some context, I am an atheist, while my husband is a believer (not particularly observant, but he does have faith). Our son hasn't stepped foot in a church, nor does he know any prayers, as we don't pray at home. He is prepared for the curriculum, though; he knows Mom isn't religious, Dad is, and Dad has expressed interest in attending. Truthfully, I'm not even sure he fully grasps these concepts of God and faith yet; he’s mostly just picked up terms like "Sunday school" or "First Communion" from his older friends, and it seems to have sparked a curiosity in him. I would really appreciate hearing from anyone else navigating a similar dynamic in their household.

Well, what can I tell you... I’m not a believer and I don't go to church. My husband is, though he doesn't go much anymore either... but he's still considered a believer. For Christmas, we buy gifts, he fasts, but I don't... he goes to church every once in a while, but I never do. My little one had their First Communion last year; I went to the church and just stood there, feeling a bit out of place... honestly, I didn't really feel a connection to it.
Now, as my child gets older, I'll let them decide whether to continue with religious education... I won't force anything or tell them what to do; I'll let them make their own choice... I'm fine with whatever happens.
My daughter refuses to go to religion class, absolutely no matter what anyone says... and she won't be going. She said she doesn't want to go, and she doesn't care if she's the only one who doesn't. To her, it's just boring.
That's just how things work in our household.
If they want to go, let them go... you can always withdraw them later if they change their mind.
It isn't going to change anything for you personally... you might end up attending a Communion service eventually, and that’s that.
Or you could just stand by the door, much like I did...
It was actually quite interesting watching everyone else go all out—ordering cakes, pastries, and planning big celebrations for Communions🤣 whereas for me, it was just another ordinary day.🍿
And for Easter egg dyeing, we just dye the eggs and play the egg games, that's all... I never observe any fasting periods.

Oh, definitely; at our school, there was a case where a child attended the religion classes, but the parents didn't want them to take Communion, so it didn't happen. Neither the child nor the parents really wanted to go through with it... yet the child still attends the classes.

Some people certainly found that unusual...

Whenever I mention that my younger daughter isn't interested in attending religious education classes, people just look at me with this overwhelming sense of pity... as if I’m somehow mentally deficient or incapable of handling things myself. It's honestly exhausting. They act like I don't understand the consequences, so I just tell them straight: how is she supposed to take her First Communion or go through Confirmation? And I say, well, she won't. Then they all just fall silent, probably whispering to themselves that they should pray for Mary and hope we can find our way through this. 😂

I know a woman who would go through the entire ritual of confession, pouring her heart out to the priest, only to step out of the church and laugh to herself, saying, "Haha, I totally played him! I didn't believe a single word I told him!"

granitewolf20 said:Hey!

coppermarlin14, I checked "no" too—so if you haven't moved away (not since you had 😉 ), mine isn't going anywhere either

Nope, I'm still here....🙂

In that case, it looks like there will be quite a few of us... maybe even more... that’s actually really great!!!🎉

Honestly, kids pick up on everything—the prayers, the confessions, all the theatrics involved in that whole circus... I mean, how could they not?
As for me, I was baptized... but I never went through First Communion or Confirmation. I ended up having a church wedding because my husband really insisted on it, even though I wasn't thrilled about the idea. I was pretty upfront with him, though; I told him straight out that I had no intention of doing any religious rites like Confirmation or Communion. Later on, we had our children baptized just like everyone else. But if I ever had to go back and redo all of that now? There is absolutely no way I’d ever marry in a church again. Honestly, the whole thing just turns my stomach.
In truth, I probably wouldn't have even married at all. I would have just lived in a common-law marriage.

And besides, what business does an eight or nine-year-old kid have with making a confession? It’s just distasteful.

You might be being a bit naive here, but 🤣
There is just no way they are going to discuss that... ☕
At least our own poor situation won't be brought up...

My son is currently enrolled in religion classes... but I’m planning on pulling him out starting in fifth grade... if I can manage to make that happen.
My daughter starts school this fall, and while filling out her enrollment forms, I made sure to check "No" for religious studies.
It feels like they aren't teaching anything truly meaningful; honestly, it just seems to confuse the kids more than anything else.
Besides, I don't want to force her into it when she clearly has no interest in attending.
I suppose if she has the right to choose her own cell phone provider, she should also have the autonomy to opt out of these classes.
My husband is a believer, but I’m not... as things stand, I know two of our children won't be participating, plus my youngest, so that makes three... and there might be more later on.

Back when my son was in first grade, only one other student opted out.

Alright then, I suppose the real question is: is it actually worth watching, or should I just skip it?

Honestly, if my mother-in-law starts acting up about this the moment our first little one arrives—like, suggesting we can't even take him for a walk because he hasn't been baptized yet—I am just going to tell her to get real.
I mean, what am I supposed to do? Drag a newborn out into the freezing middle of January to stand by some icy church just so they can pour water over him? He’d catch a cold in a heartbeat. There is absolutely no way I'm doing that.

When he was first born, right after I got home from the hospital, she was already hovering and making a fuss. She ended up staying over at my mom's place since we all live so close to each other. I actually told her not to call anyone else about this. I haven't even brought it up directly to my husband, but he’s smart enough to know that his mother can be incredibly unpredictable and difficult to deal with.😂
If he decides he wants to bring her over, then fine, someone can bring her. But if he chooses to go up to my mom's instead, then I’m just staying quiet. At the end of the day, I really shouldn't have to stress myself out over someone else's mother.

😂 Noah Ramirez7 my mother-in-law is constantly hovering, asking him if he’s hungry the second he walks through the door and trying to push food on him immediately... it's enough to drive him crazy.
Honestly, I just tune her out. I pretend I didn't hear a word because, frankly, I have zero interest in her commentary...
She also keeps insisting that I'm definitely having a boy just because she thinks my bump looks a certain way. 😂
Apparently, according to her, that's how you carry a boy... but since I was 16 weeks along, everyone else has been telling me it's a girl. Even when I had my scan at 39 weeks, the doctor confirmed it was a girl. But no, my mother-in-law still disagrees.
😂

Honestly, just go see the pediatrician. It’s not about whether it’s overkill or not...
Just go ask them instead of worrying about it.....
I really hope this passes quickly and everything turns out fine. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have a very retroverted uterus.
I didn't run into any issues during my first pregnancy, but this one has been a different story. I actually ended up in the hospital because my uterus is positioned so far back that it was pressing against my bladder, making it impossible for me to urinate (I'm not quite sure how else to describe that sensation)
The doctors there mentioned they hadn't really encountered a case quite like mine before... But now that my uterus has risen out of my pelvis during the 12th week, the pressure has finally subsided and everything seems fine! I’m just hoping I don't have to deal with anything like that again...
But like I said, my situation is pretty unique...

I dealt with an allergic reaction right after giving birth, though I actually noticed some mild symptoms about a month before my due date as well—it wasn't nearly as intense back then as it became postpartum.
Once the baby arrived, the reaction spread everywhere and it was just miserable; the itching was so relentless that I ended up scratching myself until I was bleeding.
My skin looked almost like a bad case of hives—very swollen and inflamed—but that only happened when the itching peaked. Once the itch subsided, the swelling would go down, leaving behind nothing but raw sores and scabs from all the scratching. It lasted for about a month, and honestly, nothing seemed to touch it, not even antihistamines or injections... Niko didn't have any idea what was causing it.
It turns out later on that my liver function was in a pretty catastrophic state, and doctors suggested that the rash was likely a symptom of that underlying issue.
In any case, everything just suddenly cleared up after that month passed.