Posts by Harold Anderson3

Kenneth Scott41 said:Reading through all these posts, I get the impression that most people seem to be gravitating toward Wellbutrin or Prozac, treating them as if they’re somehow the gold standard or just the best fit for everyone. I’ve been on Wellbutrin myself, but lately, I can't help but feel like it’s stopped working... or maybe its effectiveness has just started to wane. It seems perfectly logical that you might develop a tolerance to a medication if you've been taking it for six months or so, but I suppose that leaves one wondering what the next move should actually be.
Do you just bump up the dosage of the current one, or is it better to switch over to a different antidepressant entirely?

I'm in the same boat with Wellbutrin (75 mg), and I really feel like it isn't doing much anymore. My doctor switched me over from my old combo of Paxil and Lexapro, and honestly, I'd take the old stuff back in a heartbeat.🙄

Robin Gonzalez3 said:Hey, so my psychiatrist just put me on Priscilla extended-release 25 mg... and now I’m kind of tripping over this "extended-release" thing. Like, am I supposed to suck on it or what? Anyway—oops—just swallowed it already. xD

Go ahead and try sucking on it, though once you get past that initial outer layer, you'll find it tastes pretty bitter 😉. I used to love sucking on those sweet-tasting meds, and there are plenty of them out there—like Lamictal, Zyprexa, Geodon...

Larry Lewis said:The thing is, therapy is just way too expensive for my budget right now, though I’m a firm believer that sitting down with a qualified professional really does make a difference.
I don't exactly have anyone to vent to besides myself—and let's face it, I am hardly a trained expert in my own psyche.🙂

Well, I don't pay for it either; instead, I just head over to Mayo Clinic once every two weeks.
My soul feels like it’s fighting cancer right now, but I've got faith that it'll heal in time. 🙂

Henry Garcia9 said:I used to be a total skeptic when it came to group therapy. I mean, at the end of the day, we’re dealing with a chemical imbalance, right? It's biology. I'm definitely not one of those people who decides to quit their meds on a whim—that's a fast track to disaster. For me, the medication is the only thing actually doing the heavy lifting. Like I told you before, I learned that lesson the hard way. My issues usually manifest as delusions—basically, my brain starts spinning stories that have zero basis in reality...

Yeah, you're right that the illness is essentially an imbalance of chemicals in the brain, but I've found that psychotherapy can be a huge help alongside medication. For me personally, therapy really helps smooth out those depressive dips and mood swings.

Larry Lewis said:I’d pin you at 25, and frankly, I haven't aged a day myself.🙂

Sane? Please. I'm the most "normal" guy you'll ever meet—even if my medical records say otherwise.🙂
Just kidding.

We've got it lucky, though... seeing how this poor girl has to head off to a group home or something... it's just devastating, truly.

Hehe, so you actually are older than me after all.🤣
Yeah, I can't really complain... I'm still working without any issues, and everyone at the office is perfectly happy with my performance, so there isn't even a reason to bring up my health.
The only awkward part was when everyone else was grabbing drinks and I had to pass because of my medication, which felt a little strange... but hey, I just tell myself: as long as you're on the clock, you stay sober.🤷

Larry Lewis said:I'm not doing bad, though I definitely get hit with a few rough days in a row sometimes—though for me, it's more depressive symptoms than anything else. I don't really experience those specific schizo episodes; it’s more like this heavy sadness or just being completely out of sorts. For me, everything started back when I was in the military—I was only 21 then, and I'm 33 now—but 2008 was pure hell. Absolute living hell. I ended up checking myself into a psychiatric ward in Portland all on my own. Once I got through that hospitalization, things finally started looking up. My close friends who have known me forever know my diagnosis, but I don't bother telling anyone else.
Does anyone have a history of schizoaffective disorder in their family? My aunt had it, and honestly, her life was just incredibly bleak because of the illness.
And you know, I've known these guys for ages, but ever since I got sick, I haven't really felt like part of the crew anymore. It used to eat at me, but now? I don't even care enough to try. I see them once a week when we go hacking around, and that's about it.
When I first got back from my service and told the group I was running with at the time, man, the ridicule I got... I couldn't believe it. I was younger then, though, so it cut much deeper.
Anyway, I'm more stable now, but it took me well over four years of grinding to actually get to this point.

So you're 33? I honestly thought you were younger, maybe around my age.🙂
I am so sorry to hear how your friends reacted after you got home from the military. It sounds like I definitely had it easier in that department.
I mostly don't talk about my illness either, but there isn't really a need to anymore. We're pretty normal, right?? 😉

Henry Garcia9 said:I honestly can't wrap my head around how someone ends up stuck in a care facility with an schizophrenia diagnosis when we have such high-quality treatments available these days.

It’s true that there is about a 10% subset of patients who struggle to function even with medication, but those who aren't in that group can very easily slip into that category if they stop following their prescribed treatment plans. Every single time someone skips their meds, the illness tends to come back even more aggressively, and sometimes it hits so hard that a full recovery just isn't an option anymore.

Larry Lewis said:Just a quick heads-up for everyone else out there—I’m going to have to head in for an early check-up because something just isn't sitting right with me. Honestly, wish me luck... I’m hoping the doctors can actually find something useful, because this constant mental fog and brain fog is driving me absolutely insane—it's just relentless, and frankly, I'm sick of it.🙂

Man, if you're feeling that low, you should definitely go. It's always better to take control and head there on your own terms rather than having someone else force the issue. If it's just a family member helping you out, that's one thing, but if you're looking at an ambulance or the police showing up, then things have definitely gone too far.
In any case, it's really a good sign that you're listening to your gut and recognizing that you aren't feeling like yourself. Things will get better. 😉

Sam Parker said:It’s been going on for about a month and a half now. He’s barely getting three hours of sleep at a time, and his behavior is all over the place—one minute he seems perfectly fine, and the next he’s spiraling into these disjointed stories from his past that just don't make any sense.
He used to be so calm and quiet, really organized and steady, but now he keeps slipping into these episodes that I can hardly find the words to describe. I honestly have no idea how to approach him about getting back on his medication,
because things are clearly getting worse by the day... and I feel completely lost on what to do.

You should try to get him to a psychiatrist, and if he refuses to go, you might need to call 911. Honestly, it sounds like he needs to be hospitalized, because even if he does start taking his meds again right away, they aren't going to kick in fast enough to fix this immediately.

Nicole Barrett76 said:If we are dealing with an acute condition, does that not imply its nature is merely temporary? If such a state is fleeting, then regardless of how debilitating the symptoms might feel in the moment, can we truly classify it as a profound mental illness, given that the patient eventually recovers and returns to their former self?

At least, that is my perspective on the matter.

In psychiatry, "acute" can actually stretch out to cover five years. Plus, a chronic diagnosis isn't always a total disaster; with the right medication, a person can lead a perfectly normal life.
But then again, I suppose an acute situation is generally preferable, since the symptoms aren't usually as debilitating and the medication doses are milder, which naturally gives you a better shot at a full recovery.

Nicole Barrett76 said:Honestly, I think alter was just being sarcastic when responding to my questions.

I get it, I guess I played up the craziness a little too much.😁 I actually only dealt with hallucinations during that one single episode, and it was everything—auditory, visual, and even smells. Ever since I've been staying consistent with my medication (it's been nearly three years now), things have pretty much settled down completely.

Larry Lewis said:The hallucinations are actually quite brilliant—they say some incredibly profound things, and I find myself listening to them intently. Sometimes, though, they’ll just snap at me—loudly, too—so loudly my mother can hear the shouting from the next room. And it isn't just that; it's the constant, nagging idea that we "schizophrenics" are all completely unhinged—that people should just run for the hills because we're dangerous. But honestly? It’s not our fault... it’s more like having some spectral, controlling grandmother hovering over us, dictating every single move we make.

I wish I had your perspective, because I don't find them to be very pleasant company at all...🤷
Now, maybe the part about us being crazy is somewhat accurate, but as for being dangerous... well, I mean, who? Personally, I'm certainly not 😉

Adam Reed5 said:Hey everyone! I'm new here... I've been lurking for a bit reading through everything, so I finally decided to jump in and share what's been weighing on my mind.

I don't really believe in anything. Not love, not truth, not freedom, God, science... I don't know... I just don't have any ideals. There's no "meaning" for me, just the practical value of things.

And people? I don't trust them either. Not even friendship. Honestly, I get along best with people who lie all the time, because then I don't have to believe a single word they say 🤷

I don't have much respect for anything... except maybe nature. I don't really hold strong stances on anything. Like, when there’s some massive national debate about a new policy or a big election cycle... I just can't bring myself to care. It's hard to care when you don't trust the news being fed to us anyway.

My behavior is pretty irresponsible, too. Toward others—like, I'll be great with someone one day, then just change my number and vanish forever because, again, I don't believe in friendship—and toward myself, like with how I handle intimacy. Not to mention daily responsibilities or obligations. I just don't have goals or desires.

So, basically, I could probably check out by tomorrow...

It doesn't bother me much most of the time, except for those moments (maybe this is one of them) where I wash up and think—how am I actually living like this? How long can this go on? Then I just tell myself—whatever, it'll work out somehow. What's the point of "purpose"? It's just an illusion anyway. And I just go back to my old ways.

I mostly just operate on pure impulse or sheer spite.
But I'm not some heartless jerk, if anyone's wondering. I think I'm a decent person. I'd never intentionally exploit or hurt someone just because it's convenient for me.

But I feel like I can't keep going like this forever. I don't want to wake up when I'm old and realize I've spent my whole life with absolutely nothing to show for it.
I wish I had at least one principle, any kind of principle (as long as it isn't destructive), just so I had something to guide me. Something that makes my behavior consistent for more than two days in a row.

I feel like a leaf blowing in the wind. I'm doing okay for now, but it's not really leading anywhere...

Does anyone have any advice? What do you believe in, and why? Do you have some sort of "code" you live by?

Well, what can I tell you... just devote yourself to something you enjoy, set a goal, and try to reach it.
Regarding faith, I don't think that's going to help you much. I believe in God, I believe in medicine (specifically psychiatry), and I believe in science and technology. I believe there are good people out there... but it's just belief; I haven't truly felt any of it, and none of it has changed my life much. I don't know, maybe I'm believing the wrong way... maybe someone who knows how to believe properly can weigh in.
I'm just not sure, though... if you're like a leaf in the wind and you're doing okay for now, how are you even getting by?

Ronald Nelson4 said:Does anyone here living with schizophrenia and depersonalization actually have an awareness of what's happening to them?

My doctor actually noted in my clinical report that I was experiencing some "partial depersonalization" at one point. It mostly cropped up during certain religious experiences, but even during my most intense episodes, I always maintained a solid sense of who I really am.

Kenneth Alvarez98 said:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Forbes_Nash,_Jr.

Yeah, I agree. That man certainly deserved his own movie, at the very least 🙂.

feraljackal152 said:Wishing you and everyone here the best.
I have a 16-year-old child dealing with this, so I find myself reading your conversations quite often. I'm trying to understand the mindset here and figure out how I can help.
Sending lots of love, luck, and positive vibes.

I am so incredibly sorry to hear that; she’s so young to be dealing with this. Personally, I didn't face my own challenges until I was twenty-one, though I had been in psychiatric care even before then. As for how to help, I think it comes down to constant encouragement from everyone around them, staying consistent with psychotherapy, and making sure the medication routine is followed closely. I also find a lot of comfort in reading self-help books; I tend to feel much more capable when I focus on positive thinking and hold onto the belief that things will eventually work out. Just stay brave. 😉

Wishing everyone nothing but the best in this new year! 🙂
I've recently come to realize that my entire life seems to revolve around this illness. While other people are busy debating whether things will improve within the European Union or if we should look elsewhere, I know deep down that even ten European Unions wouldn't make a lick of difference if I end up forced into early disability retirement. Plus, there's the reality that I probably won't be able to start a family if I can't get healthy, and if that happens, what kind of life am I actually left with? 🙂 But then again, how things actually play out is anyone's guess, and who knows if I'll even be around for another fifty years. 🤷
I'm not saying everything will definitely go down exactly as I've laid it out here, but man, I can't help but worry...

Christian Cruz6 said:Hi everyone. I’m currently managing OCD, which has led to some pretty heavy depression and a constant sense of guilt. My current regimen is one 150mg extended-release Effexor ER tablet in the morning and one 2mg Risperdal tablet before bed. Has anyone else here dealt with this specific combination? Did you find they actually helped?

Hi there.
I’m on a 25 mg Risperdal injection every two weeks, which works out to roughly 2 mg daily. Personally, I think it’s a solid medication. I’ve been using it for over two years now to manage schizophrenia, and it has honestly made a world of difference for me. You might actually want to be glad you're just taking the pills instead of having to deal with the shots.

Larry Lewis said:My mistake—I thought you said the ICU. Sorry about that! I definitely couldn't handle the ICU, but being in the ER for a few weeks while on vacation? That’s manageable, provided it isn't intensive care.
They’ve tweaked my treatment plan slightly—just some supplements this time, no antipsychotics—so we'll just have to wait and see how that plays out.

Honestly, schizophrenia is such a fascinating, terrifying thing to me because I can't wrap my head around how someone can lose themselves so completely—how they can get so caught up in a reality that isn't there. It’s beyond my comprehension. I went through it myself, you know? During the acute phase, it was pure, unadulterated hell. I honestly don't know how I managed to endure it, let alone recover—or at least, as much as one can actually recover.
In my view, the biggest factor in triggering schizophrenia, or really any mental illness, is this modern world and the frantic way we're forced to live in it. I’m not saying everything is a total disaster—it’s not—but it certainly isn't nearly as good as it ought to be. And when things are this broken, those of us who are a bit more sensitive end up paying the price.

Well, it's not even "intense" unless they literally tie you to the bed, right? 😲
I'm not entirely sure what triggers schizophrenia, but I suspect it works like most mental illnesses, largely stemming from early childhood trauma, though there's definitely a genetic component involved too. What really keeps me up at night, though, is wondering if there's a way to actually cure it, or at least prevent it from happening in the first place.

Lately, I've been feeling a bit weighed down by a mild depression 😢 just a sense of low spirits, anxiety, and feeling unproductive... it's nothing overwhelming, but it's persistent.
Poor me, right?
Do you deal with much in the way of mood issues yourself?

I’ve always felt that Schizophrenia is easily one of the most fascinating subjects to dive into, though honestly, the entire field of psychiatry holds such a deep pull for me. If I were facing something like lung cancer, I suppose I'd find myself just as captivated by oncology, 🤷

Nicole Barrett76 said:I have a question for those of you living with Schizophrenia regarding how you remember the periods when those intrusive, irrational thoughts were at their most intense.

Is your memory of that timeframe complete, or is it much like experiencing hallucinations—where the details simply vanish from your mind entirely?

When you look back on those moments of madness now, how do those thoughts strike you?

And further, how do you combat such thoughts when they seize control of you? For instance, I find one of the most terrifying sensations to be the feeling that our very thoughts are being broadcasted, leaving us exposed so that everyone else can perceive exactly what we are thinking. In my view, that is even more harrowing than the belief that one is being persecuted. Of course, I am not someone living with Schizophrenia, so I defer to your lived experiences.

Please feel free to share your thoughts if you wish, though I certainly do not want anyone to feel pressured to respond.

I didn't really experience specific "crazy" thoughts, but my hallucinations were so vivid that the line between reality and fiction completely blurred for me.
There was some paranoia too, though since I had been in psychotherapy for quite a while by then, maybe some of those irrational thoughts were just centered on the illness itself—like worrying that I was much more unstable than I actually was.
I can't say for certain which thoughts are the absolute worst, but what you described definitely falls into that top tier, along with other fears involving things that are theoretically impossible.
Generally speaking, I remember everything, even the stuff from when I was in the thick of it. I actually wrote about all of it in my blog, so feel free to check it out if you're curious.
But honestly, I don't think the scariest part is the thoughts themselves, but rather the struggle to rebuild a normal life afterward. While medication usually clears up most of the symptoms, there are unfortunately some cases where nothing seems to help.

Larry Lewis said:Oh, please—nothing "urgent" about this, I haven't completely lost my marbles just yet.

I’m not heading into inpatient care, even though—and I'll admit this privately—the thought had crossed my mind.

If my doctor can come up with a clever little workaround, we’ll see where things go from there.

The ER is actually the newest department on campus. That's where they send people who are starting their treatment process, and it's actually quite a massive facility.