Posts by Harold Anderson3

Justin Fisher said:I’ve got a question for you guys: how are you supposed to act when you’re dealing with someone who likely has schizophrenia?

To give you a bit more context: I have this guy I went to college with, and we’ve always had this kind of loose connection where we’d catch up every once in a while after graduation. We go through these stretches where there’s zero contact, and then out of nowhere, he’ll call me and we’ll set something up to hang out. Usually, he’s the type where once we actually meet up, he’ll be calling me constantly for the next few weeks—like, every single day—and it’s always for these super weird, random reasons (not important right now what they are, but basically just totally disconnected conversations and questions). Honestly, I didn't think much of it at first because even back when we first met, he was always a bit of a "lone wolf" type, and people tended to steer clear of him because he’s just a pretty eccentric guy.
Then, about a week ago, we grabbed coffee, and he told me he’d been seeing a psychiatrist and that she’d diagnosed him with schizophrenia. To be totally blunt, I don't know much about the condition beyond the most basic stuff you see on TV. I actually asked him—kind of jokingly, honestly—if he hears voices, and he said he’d gone through a phase of that. But I didn't really take it seriously or realize he actually had a diagnosis. Looking back, though, our whole friendship has always felt a little... off? He definitely seemed more scattered and strange than usual. If he hadn't mentioned the therapy and the meds, I probably wouldn't have even questioned it, because like I said, he’s always been a bit of an oddball. For example, we’ll be talking about one thing, and suddenly he’ll jump into something completely unrelated and just start cracking up. During our hangout, there were so many moments where I just couldn't follow his train of thought. On one hand, it felt like he was using it as a defense mechanism to shut himself off, but on the other, it just looked like total chaos was going on inside his head. Basically, I didn't fully grasp the gravity of it all.

Afterward, I talked to my boyfriend about it and told him how surprised it actually made me. My boyfriend used to have a really close friend who struggled with schizophrenia, and unfortunately, that friend ended up taking his own life. He described behavior that sounded almost identical to what I was seeing with this guy. Now, it's not like there's a massive problem right this second, but he did mention that before his friend passed, he had developed this intense fixation on a girl he was in love with, and he warned me that there’s a chance this guy might start obsessing over me (since he knows I have a boyfriend). And honestly, that’s exactly what happened—ever since we saw each other, he’s been calling me nearly every day. It’s not that I mind him; he’s sweet and fun to hang out with, and I don't have any issue being friends, but I’m genuinely worried about him developing some kind of fixation on me.
So, the big question is, how should I handle this? It feels hard for me to be distant or pushy, but I also don't want to send any mixed signals that he might misinterpret in some crazy way.
Maybe I’m just being a little dramatic about the whole thing, and maybe nothing will ever happen, but I’d really love to know what to do just in case.

I think you might be overthinking things a little. While it’s incredibly heavy that your boyfriend's friend took his own life following some relationship drama, that event is really just a catalyst rather than the root cause of everything else. Honestly, I'm not sure what his feelings toward you are right now, but if he was the type of person who used to call you every single day, there's no reason he shouldn't do that now too. If talking to him doesn't feel like a burden, then please, reach out. But if it does feel overwhelming, don't force it. Just try to treat him with the same consistency you always have.

Dana Alvarez said:So, the takeaway is basically that Anika doesn't really have a clue what kind of chaos might be brewing or how to spot it. She's also unsure if her thoughts actually align with her core beliefs... I guess she's also wondering if there's any way to prevent this illness or catch it early on. Also, does anyone know where that girl from out of the blue disappeared to?

I suppose you can recognize the patterns, but you don't really have any control over how the condition progresses on its own... unless, of course, you decide to see a therapist. Honestly, I think you might be worrying a little too much about things you can't change. Did you ever experience that sensation of being completely numb, where you just didn't care about anything happening to yourself or the people around you? That was definitely my experience when I first started dealing with this. As for outofblue, she isn't actually a young girl; she's a married woman, and I suspect she just found other interests and moved on from this forum. I truly hope she's doing well.🙂

Sarah Wood8 said:I honestly feel like so many symptoms get slapped with a schizophrenia diagnosis just because people don't know any better. Depersonalization and derealization are everywhere these days, especially among young people, usually triggered by intense trauma, chronic stress, or various drug use—but those specific symptoms haven't ever actually caused schizophrenia, no matter how long they persist. In my opinion, it’s physically impossible for those sensations to evolve into schizophrenia on their own.
And that’s exactly what I find most infuriating—this trend where people who clearly don't know what they're talking about love to spread this absolute nonsense that you can actually develop schizophrenia from depersonalization or derealization. From everything I've gathered by reading hundreds of firsthand accounts on international DP/DR forums, that's just flat-out wrong; you can't "develop" a psychotic disorder from these sensations, because derealization is simply the brain's way of reacting to stress, regardless of what triggered it in the first place.
Of course, if you tell someone experiencing derealization that they're actually developing schizophrenia, you're just going to make things a hundred times worse for them.
It turns out the whole thing boils down to this irrational fear of developing schizophrenia just because of a few overlapping symptoms—which, honestly, is completely idiotic.
Depersonalization and derealization exist as distinct symptoms far more often than they do as part of schizophrenia, and honestly, they don't lead anywhere else besides the symptoms themselves. Without an actual underlying foundation for schizophrenia, you aren't going to spiral into it. At least, that’s how I see it. If that weren't the case, I would have been diagnosed by now, or maybe I eventually would have developed it if I actually carried the gene—but since I don't, all this derealization stuff is just a dead end.
That’s exactly why I think that tiny 1% of the population supposedly lacking any genetic predisposition for schizophrenia is just being misdiagnosed. They’re likely presenting with symptoms that look similar on the surface but actually have absolutely nothing to do with schizophrenia itself.
I’ve been hearing all this chatter lately about people getting slapped with a schizophrenia diagnosis, only to turn around a year later acting completely normal, as if the whole thing was just some massive mistake.

To be honest, I was fully aware of my situation at the time. I knew exactly where I stood and who I was, but there was this massive disconnect on a purely experiential level—my perception of myself and the world around me was just completely warped. It was like I couldn't recognize the world anymore, and there were plenty of moments where I wasn't even sure if I still knew who I actually was. In other words, I KNEW the facts, but I didn't FEEL them.
I used to get hit by these waves where just staring at a plain house facade or watching people pass by outside my window would completely drain me. It was like looking at anything ordinary sucked me straight into another dimension, and honestly, it felt like pure hell.

Schizophrenia? Please. It’s not that, it's something else entirely.
Medication hasn't done a damn thing for me, and honestly, I don't have much faith in it anyway—not for what I'm dealing with. Now that I'm finally seeing some light at the end of the tunnel, I’ve realized just how much certain mental health professionals love to spread misinformation and stir up drama about needing these pills. It feels like they're just pushing sketchy formulas to line the pockets of Big Pharma. From my own experience, nothing worked except for the heavy-duty anti-anxiety meds that basically just knocked me out.

In the end, I had to take matters into my own hands by cutting ties with everyone—the psychiatrists, the doctors, the medication, all of it.

I want to highlight this part. You really hit on the core of what mental illness is. Mental illnesses (including schizophrenia) are primarily disorders of emotion rather than reason. We can choose our thoughts, but we can't choose our feelings. So, if someone thinks they have schizophrenia, or fears they do, it doesn't mean they actually have it unless they truly feel it. Someone might tell you that you have schizophrenia, but that doesn't make it true, because schizophrenia isn't born from negative thoughts; it's born from feelings. I don't think anyone can influence their mental state through sheer willpower. Likewise, if someone tells you that you don't have it and you believe them, if you actually *do* have it, you still have it regardless of what you think about it.
Regarding what you mentioned about schizophrenia passing after a year: there's a term called acute psychosis (which can be labeled as schizophrenia), which means someone might only experience one episode, take medication for a while, gradually taper off, and the condition never returns. About 20% of people diagnosed with schizophrenia recover completely.

Sarah Wood8 said:I can definitely relate to what you're saying. About a year and a half ago, I was hit by a wave of derealization so intense it felt like I’d been dropped straight into hell. It wasn't just a weird feeling; I was fully aware that everything was wrong and that my brain was malfunctioning, which honestly made the terror even worse. I remember spiraling into these sudden, violent physical tremors from pure panic. I ended up in the ER at the local hospital several times because I couldn't breathe or think, and even though things have improved significantly since then, I still carry the remnants of it today. The way the world looked was completely distorted—it's almost impossible to put into words. It felt like I was living someone else's life, or maybe a thousand different lives all at once, with time itself becoming a tangled mess in my head. I'd lose the ability to recognize my own bedroom, my street, or even the city I grew up in. It's a living nightmare, like being trapped in a fever dream where your past self feels totally erased. The one thing that kept me grounded was the fact that I remained lucid enough to know this wasn't schizophrenia. I didn't spiral into those paranoid delusions about losing my mind that so many people fall into during these episodes. I actually diagnosed myself and took that specific concern to various psychiatrists across the state, and none of them ever told me I was wrong. In the end, no medication did much for me; it just eventually started to subside on its own. Of course, it’s easy to play philosopher now that I’m feeling better, but back then, it was pure survival. It also helped knowing there’s no history of mental illness in my family, which gave me some peace of mind.

I was reading somewhere that scientists supposedly found this specific gene linked to schizophrenia. Apparently, it’s some kind of ancient virus that integrated itself into human DNA way back in prehistory, back when we were barely even human—probably just some transitional primate or something like that.
I’ve been sitting here wondering about this: is schizophrenia actually rooted in an organic, genetic foundation—something we often mistakenly label as purely "psychological"—when in reality, it's hardwired into our DNA and passed down through specific genetic lineages?

What are the actual odds of someone developing this without any genetic predisposition? I’m pretty convinced that schizophrenia is fundamentally rooted in genetics—it feels like something so tangible and organic at its core. What are the chances of someone just waking up to it out of thin air if there isn't a family history involved? Even if they develop similar symptoms, can we even call that schizophrenia, or is it just some other psychological burden masquerading as the real thing?

I realize I’m throwing out a lot of questions here, and maybe my understanding of schizophrenia isn't exactly textbook perfect, but I’m honestly convinced it’s almost entirely genetic. I keep hearing these stories about people being diagnosed without any history of it in their family tree, but to me, that just sounds impossible. If this condition actually degrades the brain—specifically the gray matter, as the science suggests—it feels like there has to be some underlying organic trigger that doctors haven't quite pinned down yet. It doesn't make sense to me that something this physically destructive would just spontaneously emerge from nothing, or simply stem from other neurotic issues like anxiety, paranoia, or derealization. There has to be a biological root cause at play.

The idea that this just happens spontaneously without any genetic component sounds completely absurd to me—it’s like someone claiming they broke their leg while just lying there in bed.

That whole experience you described with derealization... honestly, it could very well be schizophrenia, except for one major detail: the fact that your condition improved without any medication.

Regarding the genetic side of things...
The general prevalence of schizophrenia in the US population is about 1%. However, I suspect there are actually twice as many people carrying the gene, perhaps closer to 2%. I arrived at that conclusion based on two points: first, if one identical twin develops schizophrenia, there’s only a 50% chance the other will, despite them having identical DNA. Similarly, if both parents have it—which would mean their child almost certainly carries the gene—the actual chance of the child developing the disorder is still only around 50%. So, beyond just having the genes, you need some kind of trigger to activate them, and I'm convinced that comes down to environmental stressors, especially during early childhood. My own upbringing was pretty traumatic (much like my mother's), which, combined with our genetics, led to this diagnosis. My half-brother also had a really difficult childhood, but he stayed healthy because he doesn't carry "that gene."

Sarah Wood8 said:So how did you actually tell they were hallucinations? How did you distinguish real cars from the fake ones? I bet the imaginary ones would've been way more interesting... like some vintage classic cars from the 1920s😁

I suppose we could compare this to dreaming. When you’re in the middle of a dream, there isn't really a way to tell if it's actually happening or if it's just a dream, right? It’s only once you wake up completely that everything becomes clear and you can separate reality from the fantasy. It felt much the same for me. It wasn't actually the cars themselves that gave it away, but rather the license plates. I saw plates from Germany and thought I was actually over there, then I saw French ones, and then some from local cities here in the States. Honestly, I think the only ones that felt truly real were the ones from my own hometown.😁
but it isn't just about having simple hallucinations; it's a much more complex disorder than that...

Sarah Wood8 said:It’s probably because she lives in a total vacuum, which is pretty obvious whenever she opens her mouth. She’s basically Alice in Wonderland at this point. 😁

Poor 😁

Sarah Wood8 said:Basically, it feels like you're either losing the plot because you're spiraling into total paranoia and fear, or you've hit that schizophrenic peak where everything feels amazing. It’s like you either don't realize you're losing it, you're riding a manic high, or you've convinced yourself you're some legendary historical figure, so everything feels fine again.
The truth is, most of the time you aren't even aware of what's actually happening to you, let alone if it's even "good."
Am I overthinking this?

Schizophrenia hits every single person differently, and honestly, I wonder if we should even be calling it just one single disease. In my own experience, I’d say about two weeks ago I was in an amazing mood, but then the fears and paranoias started creeping in—I genuinely thought people were out to get me—and it all eventually ended with hallucinations. All of this might have been preventable, but it felt like nobody was willing to step up and help me. I've heard stories about people thinking they are famous historical figures and all that, but for me, I was just seeing cars because I was walking along the interstate. It's a mix of things that are actually there and things that simply aren't.

I think I heard someone mention a while back that a certain Democrat claimed Kosor was acting like she had schizophrenia. Is that really considered an insult nowadays—just telling someone they have schizo?🤷

Larry Lewis said:I’ve got this nagging suspicion—and I could be entirely off base here, mind you—that I spent far too many years shaving my brain raw, if you catch my drift, which might have triggered a full-blown schizophrenic episode... though, who can truly say? It’s a tangled web, isn't it? You've got the genetic predispositions, the inevitable chemical imbalances, and let's not even get started on the various substances I put myself through back in the day. It's all interconnected, a messy, swirling vortex of causality.

Diego, my regards to you, fellow traveler in the fractured psyche.🙂

And if we're talking about drugs... what kind were we looking at? I’ve only ever messed around with weed, and when I finally opened up about that to my psychiatrist, she just gave me this look and told me, "Well, that's exactly what you aren't supposed to be doing."

Hey there, sending my best wishes right back to you, my fellow forum friend. 🙂

Dana Alvarez said:Did anyone notice you were acting strange, or did you think everything was totally fine? Were you scared of those hallucinations and paranoia? How long ago was this, and how are you holding up now? Sorry for the interrogation, I'm just asking because I'm pretty worried.

It’s been about five years... 😉 back then, I truly believed I had finally beaten my depression and everything was back to normal. Looking back on it now, though, I realize it wasn't actually okay at all. I didn't have the clarity to see it then, but I certainly see it now. If I were to suddenly stop taking my medication today, I know exactly what would happen: I’d fall right back into that trap of thinking I was perfectly fine when I really wasn't. The only thing I'd be certain of is that I'd need to head straight back to my psychiatrist. Even with my meds being consistent, I occasionally hit these patches where my mood gets incredibly high and I feel restless or hyperactive, which always makes me wonder if the illness is creeping back in. Fortunately, that doesn't happen very often. My last schizophrenic episode was over two years ago, and I've been strictly following my prescription ever since. I'm doing quite well now. 🙂

Sarah Wood8 said:So how did you actually realize it was schizophrenia? Was it something others noticed before you did, or did you just figure it out yourself? And what did that "boom" moment look like? Did you suddenly start believing you were someone else, or was it more about hallucinations?
You mentioned feeling good for the first time! Does that mean the schizophrenia hit so hard it felt terrifying, or were you just totally unaware that something was fundamentally wrong?

It was something both I and the people around me realized... honestly, it’s such a long story that I could probably write dozens of posts just about it. The main thing is that I spent two weeks in a manic state right before the episode hit, and that’s when the paranoia and hallucinations started creeping in. Luckily, I happened to have a referral for a psychiatrist tucked away in my pocket—I had this gut feeling I might need it—so when the police eventually found me, they called an ambulance, and that’s how I ended up being admitted to Beverly Hills. At the time, I wasn't really aware of what was happening, other than knowing deep down that I wasn't okay. I looked like a total wreck.

It all started with inherited traits mixed with what I’ve built myself—basically a fifty-fifty split. It began with these intrusive, racing thoughts, which eventually spiraled into depression. Then, just when I truly believed I had finally turned a corner and managed to feel okay without medication for the first time in years, life threw me a curveball: boom, schizophrenia.

Dana Alvarez said:Could someone explain the difference (in terms of schizophrenia) between someone who is absolutely convinced they are seeing a demon versus someone who just fears or thinks they might see one? Does that distinction even matter when it comes to schizophrenia? Thanks!

You should really take a look at my thread from about five years ago. I went through that exact same fear of schizophrenia myself, and it turned out I actually did develop it. But please, don't let that rattle you too much; it was purely a coincidence in my case. Right before it hit me, I honestly thought I was perfectly sane—I felt wonderful, almost manic, and didn't have a single worry in the world, including any fear about schizophrenia.

Well, there are certainly a few out there... but the absolute standout has to be John Forbes Nash.
He was the only Nobel Prize winner dealing with schizophrenia, and he actually provided invaluable help to the US military by cracking a code regarding an attack on the USA; plus, he’s one of those rare individuals who stayed true to himself by refusing to take medication. His life story was even turned into the movie 🙂
It's also often said that Vincent van Gogh struggled with schizophrenia back when antipsychotic drugs didn't even exist yet.

frozengardener57 said:I don't personally have schizophrenia (at least not currently), though due to some private business matters, I maintain a very specific "connection" to that diagnosis..

To give you an idea, I recently came across the story of a highly prominent and respected clinical psychologist who actually lives with paranoid schizophrenia. He was diagnosed back when he was 25, and he’s quite a bit older now.
After his diagnosis and subsequent treatment, he decided to head to grad school, eventually specializing specifically in schizophrenia! He speaks openly about his own journey to fight stigma, serving as a massive source of inspiration and encouragement for so many others. (He even has several appearances on YouTube)

His name is Frederick Frese, and you can find his site here: http://www.fredfrese.com/

I found this particular article of his absolutely fascinating—it covers various coping mechanisms and ways of managing life
for someone living with schizophrenia link

Anyway, I thought some of you might find this just as interesting! 🙂

That's honestly wonderful to hear. I was actually wondering if there were any psychiatrists out there living with schizophrenia, and seeing this proves that people dealing with it can be incredibly successful in any field they choose. It’s really encouraging 😉

It might be even more helpful to look at two different scenarios, like someone who just started their freshman year at a university and then fell ill,
versus someone who has already graduated, spent some time in the workforce, and then dealt with an illness.

Was the individual successful before they were struck by psychosis?
If they had been successful—if they had truly made their mark on the world—they certainly gained a lot, but they also lost just as much. Take, for instance, a surgeon dealing with schizophrenia. Before the illness took hold, they likely had a flourishing career and a deep sense of responsibility, but once the symptoms set in, they might find themselves unable to perform their duties, forcing them into an early retirement.
On the other hand, if they hadn't achieved much professionally, there wasn't a huge amount to lose. You could imagine someone working a steady, modest job at a local printing shop in a city like Columbus; they earned a living, fell ill, and eventually transitioned into disability or retirement, which, understandably, offers much less financial security than what the surgeon once enjoyed.
In my view, the psychological weight is probably heavier for the doctor, even if their quality of life remains higher than that of the print shop worker.
Fortunately, with the advancements in modern medication, neither the surgeon nor the worker necessarily has to face an early exit from the workforce.

fadedbear92 said:Someone actually suggested I open this thread—though, to be honest, it’s something I’ve been chewing on for quite a while now.
For those of you who have come to terms with where you are and are managing things through therapy or medication: in what ways do you feel "diminished"? I personally feel we all carry some kind of weight from it, though I suppose that really depends on how intense the struggle is at any given moment... anyway, if you're feeling up to it, I'd love to hear your thoughts. Do you think there’s a silver lining here? Like, have we gained any unique perspectives or qualities because of this struggle that we might have missed otherwise?

In my experience, building a deep connection with someone who is completely "neurotypical" can be pretty tough when you're dealing with your own mental health battles. I’ve had three significant relationships in my life, and two out of those three partners were also navigating their own psychological struggles. I usually try to hold off on talking about my condition for as long as I possibly can, but eventually, it’s something that just has to come up. Outside of that specific area, I don't really feel "handicapped"; with my medication, I feel like I can function just like anyone else. It wasn't always that way, though, and I feel like I lost a few good years of my life to it.

Larry Lewis said:I find myself nodding along here—partly because I carry an F20.0 diagnosis myself, though, frankly, I don't feel like I have schizophrenia at all. In fact, I haven't experienced any symptoms for years now. Some people—the skeptics, the ones who think they know everything—would argue that the symptoms would just resurface the moment I stopped my medication. But I disagree. I truly believe my mind has grown stronger through the process—it's developed a sort of resilience—so even if things were to shift, those horrific symptoms wouldn't ever return quite as violently as they once did.

I've heard it whispered that the illness just keeps returning more intense every single time. Given how bad things got for me before, I find myself wondering if it could even possibly get worse than that. Honestly, I probably won't ever have to find out, because I have absolutely no intention of ever stopping my medication. Not ever.

Larry Lewis said:I’ve recently gone back on antidepressants—though, frankly, my bouts of depression haven't been nearly as crushing as yours seem to be. How am I managing? Well, I find myself constantly rushing over to my doctor's office just to get my refills🙂

Whenever the darkness really takes hold, I feel like I’m sinking... I can't seem to pull myself out of it on my own. The absolute worst part is this internal pressure—it feels like there's ten tons of lead sitting right on my heart, crushing the life out of me

It seems like it's just the pills that do the trick—whether they're yellow, white, or pink... once I start this new one, I'm hopeful things will finally start looking up.