Diary of a Housewife: Chat Log

hiddenmarlin14 said:Okay, so do you sanitize your hands right after walking out of the grocery store? 😳

Watch out for those sanitizers, though! I read somewhere they can cause blindness, rabies, and even Alzheimer's... 🧐 Next thing you know, they'll be blaming everything on some new virus... 🧐

Susan Kim91 said:Are you strictly ordering takeout, or do you actually hit up the grocery store? 😁

Haha, I'm just kidding! I'll just wing it whenever I have to... 😳

driftingmarlin5 said:Watch out for those disinfectants. I read somewhere they can cause blindness, rage, and Alzheimer's. 🧐 Next thing you know, they'll be calling it the corona. 🧐

I picked up some organic stuff, though I have no clue what it actually does. I’m definitely not using that junk they’ve been pushing everywhere lately. 😳 I’ve got some hygiene wipes on me, too. 😳

So, I went ahead and cleaned the windows on Saturday. The kids managed to smudge up all the inside panes, and then the rain hit the outside—meaning my hard work was basically for nothing 🙂

Drew Ross2 said:Hey, Cap, is that actually you? 😲

Seriously, though. 😳 You can't just fix your hair, pick at your ear, or dig in your nose right after checking out at the grocery store 😳 and then put on a face mask with those same hands. 😳 Use some hand sanitizer first. 😳

Drew Ross2 said:And I went ahead and scrubbed all the windows on Saturday. The kids smeared up the inside ones, and then the rain hit the outside... what a total waste of effort 🙂

Honestly, just grab some of those window wipes and you're good to go.

We really need to teach the kids how to clean and wipe things down ASAP ☕

hiddenmarlin14 said:Come on, seriously. 😳 You can't just go fixing your hair, picking your ears, or digging in your nose right after hitting the checkout at the grocery store 😳 and then put on a face mask with hands like that. 😳 First, sanitize your hands. 😳

😲 So, can I masturbate if I touch the cash register at the store? 😲

Susan Kim91 said:😲 Is it okay if I masturbate while touching the cash register at the grocery store? 😲

😂

driftingmarlin5 said:😂

Don't you dare take that away from me 😲

Susan Kim91 said:😲 Can I masturbate if I touch the cash register at the store? 😲

Go right ahead. Honestly, your junk hasn't smelled anything decent or stood up in ages anyway. 😳 COVID 😳

hiddenmarlin14 said:Oh man, just go ahead! You’ve finally smelled something actually good enough to make you feel alive again... honestly, it's like everything's finally looking up... 😳 So, I was just thinking about everything that went down with the whole pandemic situation... man, what a ride... honestly, still feels kind of surreal when you look back at how much everything changed overnight! 😳

😂

hiddenmarlin14 said:Come on, seriously. 😳 You shouldn't be fixing your hair, picking at your ears, or digging in your nose right after you've finished checking out at the grocery store. It’s just common sense—or maybe it isn't, I guess. 😳 And he’s even wearing a mask with hands like those—I guess. 😳 First, hand sanitizer. 😳

What else could she do? It’s all just propaganda, I guess. 😳

driftingmarlin5 said:You could probably just grab some window wipes—you'd likely get by just fine with those.

And kids should probably learn how to clean and do laundry as soon as possible—I guess. It’s just common sense, really. ☕

When am I heading back to Lidl for my second trip? 🐔

hiddenmarlin14 said:Oh please, you’re acting like you haven't been feeling yourself way too much lately, just getting all worked up over nothing 😳 Corona 😳

God help me if I actually start catching feelings ☕ We're living in the 21st century and everyone is basically gay ☕

hiddenmarlin14 said:Go ahead then—as if you’ve ever actually felt anything enough to get worked up about it, let alone reached a climax 😳 corona 😳

He isn't exactly getting worked up over much anyway.😁

driftingmarlin5 said:😂

That isn't funny. We're talking about serious matters here. 🕺

Drew Ross2 said:You can grab it next time I hit up Lidl🐔

You could just find that at CVS😳

BTW, CVS has an online shop too😳

Susan Kim91 said:God forbid my libido actually works for once☕ We’re living in the 21st century and everyone is gay now☕

Being gay is so last century... we progressive folks don't even deal with that dirty, backwards, primitive nonsense anymore☕

Susan Kim91 said:God help me if I start getting worked up over this too. ☕ It’s the 21st century and everyone's gay. ☕

Drew Ross2 said:He doesn't give a damn anyway. 😁

Fair enough. ☕

I'm getting worked up over nothing. ☕ Stomach issues. Just great. ☕ I honestly can't be bothered to get out of bed today. ☕

driftingmarlin5 said:Being gay is so last century. We progressive people don't even deal with those dirty, backward, primitive nonsense things anymore.☕

Exactly. I just masturbate to completely asexual objects so I won't be some primitive creature driven by primal urges. This morning I was jerking off on the subway, but I made sure to stare blankly into space so the other commuters wouldn't think I was looking at them and turn out to be some perverted maniac.☕

driftingmarlin5 said:Take that to the DMs. 😳

BTW, the DM actually has a webshop. 😳

Being gay is so last century—we're more advanced now, we don't even deal with those dirty, backward, primitive nonsense things anymore. ☕

I can't go on the webshop—if I do, I'll end up clicking everything thinking it's free. 😳

Last time I logged into ellipse mom, I ended up ordering a TV, a kitchen scale, and a hand blender. 😳

hiddenmarlin14 said:Well, alright then. ☕

I've got an erection. ☕ Stomach. ☕ I just don't have the energy to get out of bed today. ☕

What's the big deal about nitpicking now—even you're starting to find something to complain about. 😳