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Home › Lifestyle › Health › Women's Health › Do you feel awkward at the gynecologist, or are you totally chill about it?

Do you feel awkward at the gynecologist, or are you totally chill about it?

Started by Donna Wood52 · · 👁 10 views · 118 replies

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Participants Donna Wood52Taylor Smith3stormymaker24Aaron Garcia36hiddenscout362Sam Richardson2Alex Patel96Patrick Anderson4restlesstiger102Lawrence WellsSarah Garcia12Scott Brown31Jesse Evans85Jonathan Gray75Thomas Roberts9Austin Ramirez3Elizabeth Patel67redpilot37Joseph Wright5Chloe Gomez6Arthur Young10Morgan Wilson7Amy KellyAmy Fowler48 …
Sandra Wood Sandra Wood Newcomer
1 message
joined Feb 2010
#101 ·
The first time was incredibly awkward... I was so embarrassed I didn't even bother asking any questions; I just wanted to get out of the doctor's office as fast as possible...

It’s fine now... It isn't my favorite kind of exam, but you do what you have to do...
Roger Rodriguez Roger Rodriguez Active Member
220 messages
joined Jul 2009
#102 ·
Karen Wells17 said:Honestly, I hate losing my cool, but every single time... somehow, it’s just the most uncomfortable exam for me. Like, I’d trade one OB-GYN for five dentists in a heartbeat! 🤣 It makes me even more anxious that something might be wrong—otherwise, I'd be on a pilgrimage visiting every specialist in the city, which is just... yeah. And it isn't even about being shy or embarrassed, and I don't mind if the doctor is male—in fact, I actually have much better experiences with men (though I saw one female doctor before I switched to a male practitioner, and I've stuck with him, but that's beside the point)... But seriously, when I'm on that table, I feel like I'm having a heart attack; my heart starts racing so fast I could perform miracles at the Vatican! Not that I mean to, obviously... I just involuntarily tense up so hard that I practically launch medical instruments across the room like they're coming out of a cannon. I once actually hit a guy in the head with one—I'm serious!!!😂🤣
My mom was with me that time, and after I got off the table, we were all dying of laughter... It was like a catapult effect! Now, when I had my checkup just yesterday, the doctor mentioned we should run a Pap smear since it's been so long, and I was already a total nervous wreck from pure anxiety. I think I need a psychiatrist! I just can't relax. It feels so silly because, honestly, I haven't even had bad experiences myself; I've only witnessed some pretty intense situations and treatments with friends that were genuinely shocking. They went through so much, including comas... so now, even I start shaking and my legs tremble the moment I'm on that table. Does anyone have any advice? 🤷 It's so frustrating because I haven't even had anything bad happen to ME, yet here I am, freaking out like crazy, yeah...🙄

Maybe try to find a way to unwind before you even get to the clinic. I get terrible anxiety over test results too; the exam itself isn't the worst part, but waiting for the results absolutely kills me.
And whenever I'm there, as soon as I'm positioned, I just imagine the doctor looking up with this terrified expression and saying, "I've never seen anything quite like this..."😲"
Well, it's not quite like me trembling and throwing objects at people's heads, though! 😉
Try arriving at the office maybe two hours early so you get incredibly bored; hopefully, you'll just want to get it over with as quickly as possible so you can finally go home. 🤷
rowdyotter65 rowdyotter65 Member
24 messages
joined Sep 2009
#103 ·
Sarah Wells23 said:Try showing up for an appointment like, say, two hours early—just to see how quickly you can turn "extra time" into pure, unadulterated boredom. You'll end up sitting there just wishing you could get the whole thing over with so you can finally head home. 🤷

🙂 This actually works. It’s happened to me a few times now—I honestly felt so completely drained from just sitting there waiting that I eventually stopped caring about the actual exam results; I just wanted to lie down on that table and be done with it.
Aaron Long2 Aaron Long2 Newcomer
5 messages
joined Apr 2013
#104 ·
Sarah Wells23 said:Maybe try to find some way to relax before you head in to see the specialist. I get that absolute dread regarding test results too—the actual exam isn't even the worst part, it’s the agonizing wait for the news that just kills me.
And every single time I'm there, lying back, I just imagine him looking up at me with this terrified expression and saying something like, "I have never seen anything quite like this..."😲"
Well, it's not exactly like I'm shaking uncontrollably or pelting the man in the face with random objects. 😉
Try arriving at the clinic, say, two hours early—just enough time to get incredibly bored so you actually want to get it over with just to go home. 🤷

Oh, ladies, thank you all so much for the advice!
🤣 Honestly, Sarah Wells23, I was in the exact same boat recently—my Candida had gone totally rogue, so I had to bite the bullet and see the specialist after being away for quite a while... And as he's looking down there, I'm thinking to myself—if a spider flies into this web, or maybe a dead shrew or something, it’s game over.😂
Thank you, everyone; I’ve been trying to work through this mentally—just wandering around the forums here and there to vent... Okay, I actually feel a bit better now. When I went back a few days ago—because that inflammation hadn't fully cleared up—I wasn't quite as tense as before... I suppose I just need to "practice" my relaxation techniques, haha... And clearly, my little dog decided to help out with the whole ordeal—she ended up running into the waiting room three times in the last few days because she kept trying to squeeze her way inside. Of course, it happened right at my doctor's office. 🤣 The thing is, there’s a little grassy field right next to the clinic, and the lady at the front desk saw me heading toward it last week—now, whenever she doesn't see me, she peeks out to see if I'm tucked away inside. 🤣 🤣
God, I am such an impossible patient... 😂 Throwing medical supplies around, pelting innocent people, having my dog chasing me through the waiting room... 🤣
Now I'm scheduling an appointment with the doctor, either today or tomorrow, and let's hope this time there are no "human casualties or flying objects." I can't believe this specialist hasn't had the honor of treating me yet—I practically threw things at the guy before him until he retired! But this one is great too; he actually suggested I book an appointment since it's been so long—poor guy has no idea what's coming his way, haha... Well, I really hope I don't repeat my little "attack" and that I'm actually making progress with the whole relaxing thing!
Thanks so much, girls! You've truly made me laugh and helped me chill out, and I'll definitely be thinking of you all when I'm there to make it easier!
Aaron Long2 Aaron Long2 Newcomer
5 messages
joined Apr 2013
#105 ·
Chloe Thompson37 said:I honestly don't see what there is to be afraid of—just imagine you're heading ☕ and that's it... I went to my first appointment at the Mayo Clinic when I was about 16 and wasn't scared at all... it’s totally normal and necessary, and just because other people have a hard time doesn't mean you will too... try to stay positive and keep an optimistic mindset; it makes everything so much easier... 👍

You make a valid point, and I know that’s how I should handle it, but I always seem to get hit by this wave of anxiety... I don't know—normally I wouldn't call myself a "freak" and I'm not exactly terrified of doctors, but whenever I'm at the Mayo Clinic, I just feel this weird sense of embarrassment...
Actually, looking back, I think I'm finally starting to untangle myself from all of this; I really need to sit down and rationalize the whole thing for myself—and, of course, attempt to separate my own feelings and physical states from whatever my friend is going through. It seems I may have processed everything far too subjectively, which led to me consciously tormenting myself further...
Douglas Booth22 Douglas Booth22 Active Member
60 messages
joined Aug 2009
#106 ·
I’d much rather schedule an appointment with my OB-GYN than sit in a dentist's chair; the latter is a total nightmare for me.
Aaron Long2 Aaron Long2 Newcomer
5 messages
joined Apr 2013
#107 ·
Chloe Robinson80 said:Honestly, I’d much rather deal with a gynecologist than sit in a dentist's chair—that is my absolute worst nightmare.

Well, if you're looking for an exchange, let's make it happen.😉
Donna Wood52 Donna Wood52 Active MemberOP
145 messages
joined Dec 2008
#108 ·
I went to see a male OB-GYN for the first time, and honestly, it wasn't even the gender that threw me—it was just how tall and attractive he was.
I don't know... I think I’d actually feel more at ease seeing someone who was just plain unattractive. 🤷 If you catch my drift! 😁

I was in there getting an ultrasound, and he had such a gentle touch. I've heard from plenty of other women that male doctors tend to have a lighter hand, whereas female doctors can be a bit rough when they're using
that speculum. It can be so painful.

It’s easier to go to a woman, sure—but then I start thinking about the personalities some of them have. At least most of them are manageable.
Roger Rodriguez Roger Rodriguez Active Member
220 messages
joined Jul 2009
#109 ·
I’ve actually never seen a different OB-GYN. I’ve stuck with the same doctor since my very first visit, and honestly, he’s wonderful—so gentle, and he always walks me through everything he’s doing so I don't get startled.
When he noticed how tense and uncomfortable I was, he told me he wasn't even going to try to force me to relax; he said women usually don't stop feeling awkward at the gynecologist until they've had a baby, and nothing else really helps before then. 😂
briskbison28 briskbison28 Member
11 messages
joined Mar 2008
#110 ·
During my first few visits to the gynecologist, I actually switched doctors after the first one. She wasn't necessarily incompetent, but she just made me feel... uneasy.
The second one was a straight-up nightmare. I walk in—thankfully it was summer, so I was wearing a skirt and didn't have anything on underneath—and she just says, "Sit down," pointing at the chair in front of her desk. 😕I was like, "No way, I'm not sitting there without underwear," 😁
So, I finally get onto the actual exam chair, legs spread, and she starts. It wasn't exactly gentle, but I figured, fine, let's just get this over with quickly.
Right in the middle of everything, a nurse bursts in to tell the doctor that someone scratched her car in the parking lot. This woman starts swearing so aggressively that even the toughest construction worker in the States would be embarrassed, all while I’m lying there feeling it deep in my gut. I have a pretty high pain tolerance, but I actually let out a yell that made me feel self-conscious for a second. 🙄But for her? Not even a flinch. 😁
She just kept going, being incredibly aggressive and digging away, all while making vulgar comments about the sexual lives of the people who messed up her car. Meanwhile, I'm just lying there, half-frozen in pain.
Later, I went back to ask her to run some specific tests. She refused, so I just got up and walked out. Honestly, I should have just done that the very first time. 😵

Now, I see a specialist whom I affectionately call the "Wizard of the Exam Room," and I absolutely love him. He always manages to make me laugh, and I don't feel awkward at all. 🙂
Christian Richardson9 Christian Richardson9 Member
20 messages
joined Feb 2010
#111 ·
I always make sure to see a woman.
Honestly, I’d much rather deal with an angry woman than some aggressive guy any day of the week.
I grew up dealing with women everywhere—in doctor's offices, at service counters, in schools... basically, I've been surrounded by witches since preschool. And if some random man raises his voice or acts rude? I’m instantly on the verge of tears.

I'm just scared of them, let's be real—they're bigger and stronger.😢

Like, back when I went in for a chest X-ray, this male radiologist actually barked at me, "Take that bra off, what do you think you're doing?? You're driving me crazy..." and there I was, stripping off my bra and crying right then and there.😢
(I had no idea I even had to take it off—it was my first time going alone—and look, it's not like it's easy being sixteen and having to expose yourself to a stranger.)
If it had been a woman, the whole vibe would have been completely different.🤷

I don't know if it's just me, but when I'm feeling that vulnerable and exposed, the last thing I need is some potentially pissed-off guy hovering over me.

Plus, I've heard enough horror stories from my girlfriends about their gynecologists to last a lifetime. Don't get me wrong, I don't have a massive prejudice—at the end of the day, they're all just people—but just to be safe, I stick to women. It's comfortable about 95% of the time.

Which, frankly, is still better than how I feel during a big exam, at the dentist, or sitting in a stylist's chair.
Betty Barnes57 Betty Barnes57 Newcomer
2 messages
joined Nov 2009
#112 ·
I always feel a bit awkward, even though I’m seeing an OB-GYN I actually trust...
I don't know, just the whole idea of someone poking around down there isn't exactly my idea of a good time.😉
Anthony White8 Anthony White8 Member
39 messages
joined Jun 2010
#113 ·
🤣I gotta get this off my chest...

So my friend goes to see this private OBGYN, right? First time she was pregnant. He does the exam, tells her to get dressed and pee into one of those little specimen cups... he walks out, she pees, and she’s just sitting there waiting and waiting and waiting... nothing. Then he pops out of the exam room into the next office and what do you know—the nurse is literally sitting on the doctor's lap (he's married, by the way)... it's disgusting😲
My friend is just frozen there at the door, white as a sheet, clutching that damn cup, and she managed to squeeze out😳"Excuse me," then just turned around and bolted....

ps. And get this—she's actually seeing him for her fourth pregnancy today😕..of course, he's cycled through a few different nurses over the years
boldraven78 boldraven78 Newcomer
1 message
joined Oct 2009
#114 ·
Megan Ross36 said:🤣Alright, I seriously need to get this off my chest...

So, my friend was seeing this private OB-GYN back when she was pregnant with her first baby. Everything seemed totally normal at first—he does the exam, tells her to get dressed, grabs a specimen cup, and asks her to go ahead and pee in it. He leaves the room, so she gets ready, does what she needs to do, and just sits there waiting... and waiting... and waiting. Seriously, it felt like an eternity! Finally, she realizes he’s not coming back, so she peeks out, only to see him walk right into the next exam room where the nurse is sitting on his lap! And get this—the guy is married! Can you believe the nerve of some people?😲
My bestie was basically standing there like she’d just seen a ghost, looking totally stunned and barely able to hold onto her little cocktail glass, when she finally managed to squeeze out the words.😳Hey, sorry about that—I totally turned around and just walked away...

P.S. Even today, she’s bringing her fourth pregnancy to him for a checkup.😕So, naturally, over those couple of years, they’ve gone through a few different nurses too...


I honestly can't tell if I should be laughing my head off or just sitting here feeling a little blue about the whole thing. It’s one of those weirdly surreal moments where you're caught right in the middle, stuck between a good chuckle and a heavy sigh.

Honestly, when it comes to heading to the gynecologist, I just don't see why anyone would feel awkward about it... personally, I've never had any issues with it at all, though I get the feeling most people overthink things or make a huge deal out of it, which ends up turning a simple doctor's visit into this massive, scary ordeal that they dread.
ruggedscout91 ruggedscout91 Active Member
63 messages
joined Feb 2010
#115 ·
I believe clinical expertise and a thorough examination are the only things that actually matter. Let’s be honest—I’ve never once enjoyed a medical exam, gynecological or otherwise. To me, the person in the white coat is simply a doctor, nothing more. In my eyes, they don't even have a gender; they are just a necessary evil. I’ve never viewed an exam as a personal attack. If there’s pain, I speak up. That’s being honest. So, this idea of looking for erotic undertones during an appointment with a male gynecologist, or playing the part of the modest victim, is frankly ridiculous. Sex doesn't belong in a medical clinic; it belongs somewhere else. People need to realize that and let professionals do their jobs without interference.
Nicholas Campbell3 Nicholas Campbell3 Newcomer
1 message
joined Feb 2010
#116 ·
I spent forever searching for a "normal" gynecologist...

so here’s my story;
I went downtown to see this super famous OBGYN who completely missed my Candida diagnosis—which meant I was dealing with chronic infections for ten years straight that even showed up on my Pap smear... Basically, I wasn't being treated at all. And that constant pain in my right groin? It became my entire life. Nobody could figure out why it hurt—I did every single test imaginable, including a colonoscopy that nearly took my youth away from me... Since she was such a "respected" doctor, I didn't want to walk away because I trusted her expertise, plus I really wanted a female doctor... But since the pain was so sneaky and nobody had a clue, a friend suggested her guy, Dr. Banovic over in the suburbs. I hesitated, obviously, but after everything I'd been through, I figured I had nothing left to lose and finally saw him. With his high-tech setup and years of experience, this male doctor clocked exactly what was happening immediately—he diagnosed me with chronic Candidiasis. See, yeast is harmless until it multiplies enough to cause those intense, hidden pains. He put me on a treatment plan involving creams, suppositories, and a specific diet to stop the yeast from thriving. Unlike my previous doctor, he actually treated me like a person, which totally blew my prejudices about choosing a gynecologist out of the water. You don't pick an OBGYN based on their gender or how loud their reputation is—you pick them based on how they treat you. Getting the right approach and a timely diagnosis, combined with persistent, proper treatment, could save so many women's health—or even their lives. Now, my Pap is clear, the inflammation is gone, and the pain has vanished... I'm currently trying for a baby, and Dr. Banovic is definitely going to be there for the delivery!!!!!!!!
stormymaker24 stormymaker24 Active Member
98 messages
joined Sep 2008
#117 ·
Given that there are already what feels like twenty-six different threads discussing gynecologists and whether a doctor's gender actually matters to female patients, this latest topic is entirely redundant. The poll can stay, I suppose, if you must have it.
Arthur Martinez9 Arthur Martinez9 Newcomer
2 messages
joined Mar 2010
#118 ·
Carol Scott98 said:A gynecologist is a doctor first and foremost. You can tell the difference between someone who went into gynecology just to stare at female anatomy and someone who actually cares about the profession. If you feel like they're hitting on you or treating you like some kind of object, then yeah, they're probably just seeing you as a sexual object. But if you can have a normal conversation with them and they act like a regular person, there's nothing to worry about. By that logic, women should be going to urologists just to get a look at guys' junk 🤣 😂 haha... but that's not how it works!! Everyone chooses their own specialty based on what they want to do.
And who knows—maybe there's a lesbian clique among the gynecologists too? Is anyone actually worried about that!? 😉 😁 😛 Just kidding...

I highly doubt anyone would spend ten years in medical school just to ogle women. There are much easier ways to go about that.
Samuel Morgan40 Samuel Morgan40 Active Member
178 messages
joined Mar 2010
#119 ·
Melpina;23218807 said:...I went in for an ultrasound and he had such a gentle touch—I've heard from plenty of women that male practitioners tend to be lighter-handed, whereas women might be a bit more forceful when they use the
speculum
./QUOTE]

Well, it seems that’s actually the case—barring the occasional exception, of course. I’ve had the exact same experience—men often seem much more careful (perhaps because we don't share the same anatomy 😁). I’ve even noticed a distinct difference during Pap smears, so I suppose it’s fair to say that women can be a little rougher, though I wouldn't say that applies to everyone 😉

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