People who are choosing to be childfree

Carl Edwards10 said:I agree with your post and share your views.
Unfortunately, it seems like that mindset is still deeply rooted here in America—if you aren't married by, I don't know, 30 or 35, and haven't had kids (ideally two, a boy and a girl, right?), then you've achieved nothing and you're just a selfish careerist. Okay, I'm exaggerating a bit, but I don't doubt there are people who would agree with that thesis...
Personally, I'm in the same boat as you. One day, if everything falls into place, it would be nice.. But just a few years ago, I categorically refused the idea of kids because I simply didn't think I was that type and couldn't see myself as anyone's parent 🙂 As it happens, as I get older, my opinion is shifting, but regarding people who don't want kids—I have nothing negative to say about them. I don't think they are bad or selfish. In fact, I think if someone doesn't want children, it's better that they don't have them, right? If someone doesn't feel that urge, doesn't think it will fulfill them, and doesn't see themselves in that role—why go through with it? You can't just say, "Fine, I'll try it and see what happens" 🤣

Haha, nobody is nagging me to marry yet, but for a while, everyone was really pushing me to find a boyfriend 🙄I’m honestly just enjoying being single right now, and the idea of jumping back into anything isn't even on my radar... I don't feel ready for that kind of thing. And look, I get that most of them didn't mean any harm, but I don't know... this constant pressure feels stupid. I'm not going to force myself to change how I feel just to fit someone else's version of what's "smart" or "best"...

Well, I guess everyone else just knows what's best for you better than you do, right? Like, how are you supposed to figure out your own life if you're too busy listening to the herd? It’s like they think they’re doing your thinking for you. 😉 🤣
There's really no point in wasting your breath explaining yourself to people who have already made up their minds—even if they mean well. They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and man, they aren't kidding. Just do you. 😁

Dana Davis5 said:I actually had to start avoiding certain women altogether because they wouldn't stop nagging me about getting married and having kids—it was driving me crazy! So, I just stepped back from those circles and solved the problem myself 😁 ...though, granted, there are plenty of brilliant women out there who happen to be moms, but they aren't busy lecturing other women on how they "must" have children. They're... well, they're intelligent enough to respect everyone else's life choices, you know?

Nice, props to you.
I know that vibe all too well. I had this one cousin who was constantly "on her hormones"—basically acting like an old lady—and now that she finally has grandkids, she thinks everyone needs to rush out and start a family ASAP.🙄🙂
I won't even get into how much blood she sucked from me with her constant harassment. Honestly, I felt reborn once I cut her out of my life. Pure bliss. Total peace.
Ladies, just live your lives. Don't break your heads over whether you want kids or not—you already know what you want, so stop overthinking it. And if someone starts attacking you like this old lady, just hop in a rocket and blast off to Mars. 🙂

Most people don't have kids—it’s just that we’re all too old now, and that’s that. I suppose there's no point in arguing further about it.

lonepuma2 said:Nice, props to you.
I know that vibe all too well. I had this one cousin who was constantly "on her hormones"—basically acting like an old lady—and now that she finally has grandkids, she thinks everyone needs to rush out and start a family ASAP.🙄🙂
I won't even get into how much blood she sucked from me with her constant harassment. Honestly, I felt reborn once I cut her out of my life. Pure bliss. Total peace.
Ladies, just live your lives. Don't break your heads over whether you want kids or not—you already know what you want, so stop overthinking it. And if someone starts attacking you like this old lady, just hop in a rocket and blast off to Mars. 🙂

I tend to prune people like that pretty quickly—I honestly don't have the bandwidth to waste my energy on pointless arguments about my own priorities or trying to justify my choices to people who just don't get it. I need all my energy for my health, which isn't exactly perfect as it is, so I'm not about to burn it on empty bickering. It reminds me of when my neighbors used to nag me about why I'd rather hang out online than socialize with them... I basically told them my computer isn't going to bite me.🤣 Anyway, now they think I'm being rude and foul-mouthed (which, okay, fair point), while they act like absolute saints—as if they’d suddenly forgive my "attitude" if I just converted to their way of thinking and started acting "normal" by their standards.😁 If someone can't respect your personal choices, there's really no point in trying to be friends with them anyway. They should just go find people who think exactly like they do and call it a day.🤷

First off, I totally get not wanting kids. I respect everyone's choices—we don't all need to be parents.
Here’s my deal: up until I was 25, I was convinced I’d never want them. Honestly? I couldn't stand the thought of messing up my life for some brats. But once I hit 25, it clicked that I’d probably end up having kids eventually, even if "I'm still young, have my whole life ahead of me, it's just not the right time yet". By 29, I decided it was finally time. 😬So what changed? I spent about six years living with my boyfriend, basically just living for ourselves—indulging in every little kink and luxury we could afford. We lived pretty damn good. It was pure hedonism, and we were loving every second of it. Then one day it just hit me: this is great, but is this really what I want for the rest of my life? Is this enough to fill the next several decades? For me, the answer was a hard no.
Bottom line: it’s fine if you don't want kids, but just keep in mind that you might change your mind down the road.😉

Donna Taylor68 said:First off, I totally get not wanting kids. I respect everyone's choices—we don't all need to be parents.
Here’s my deal: up until I was 25, I was convinced I’d never want them. Honestly? I couldn't stand the thought of messing up my life for some brats. But once I hit 25, it clicked that I’d probably end up having kids eventually, even if "I'm still young, have my whole life ahead of me, it's just not the right time yet". By 29, I decided it was finally time. 😬So what changed? I spent about six years living with my boyfriend, basically just living for ourselves—indulging in every little kink and luxury we could afford. We lived pretty damn good. It was pure hedonism, and we were loving every second of it. Then one day it just hit me: this is great, but is this really what I want for the rest of my life? Is this enough to fill the next several decades? For me, the answer was a hard no.
Bottom line: it’s fine if you don't want kids, but just keep in mind that you might change your mind down the road.😉

God, this is such a wrapped-up cliché: "you'll see, everyone wants kids eventually." You sound like that lady from the earlier posts.
Just because you wrap something up in ten sentences doesn't mean your intent isn't obvious.

Obviously, people change their minds about everything. You don't need to lecture them like it's some groundbreaking revelation that nobody has ever considered before.

You aren't sharing this to encourage reflection; you're doing it to flex your own moral superiority.

Look, I honestly just gave myself permission to change my mind if I feel like it—I don't think anyone else needs to give me a green light on that, you know? 😉

My bad. Wasn't trying to act all high and mighty here. I just looked at this thread and saw a massive pile of haters attacking anyone talking about kids or parenting—honestly, some of those posts sounded like they were written by toddlers—so I figured I’d offer a different perspective to keep things civil.
At the end of the day, for some people, staying childless is actually the better move. Not because of them, but for the sake of the kids.

Later. 👋I stopped caring about these forum fights a long time ago.

I have this nagging suspicion that ten years from now, we’ll be living in some bizarre sci-fi reality where childbirth happens through a penis or a male anus, so honestly, I'm out. My narrow hips simply weren't built to endure that kind of physiological nonsense. 😁

redscout46 said:I have this nagging suspicion that ten years from now, we’ll be living in some bizarre sci-fi reality where childbirth happens through a penis or a male anus, so honestly, I'm out. My narrow hips simply weren't built to endure that kind of physiological nonsense. 😁

And even if the world flips upside down and that actually becomes a thing, you wouldn't notice since you clearly haven't even heard of a C-section yet.😉

My brain and my hips will stay perfectly intact.😉

Brandon Foster7 said:And even if the world flips upside down and that actually becomes a thing, you wouldn't notice since you clearly haven't even heard of a C-section yet.😉

My brain and my hips will stay perfectly intact.😉

I’m not interested in anything involving scalpels, dilations, incisions, or any other surgical nonsense. To be perfectly blunt, the whole concept of being cut open or having some procedure performed on me is completely off the table. I went through one surgery once, and frankly, the recovery was a total nightmare that left me feeling pretty shaken, so please, don't try to lecture me or tell me why I should change my mind. I've made up my decision.

redscout46 said:I’m not interested in anything involving scalpels, dilations, incisions, or any other surgical nonsense. To be perfectly blunt, the whole concept of being cut open or having some procedure performed on me is completely off the table. I went through one surgery once, and frankly, the recovery was a total nightmare that left me feeling pretty shaken, so please, don't try to lecture me or tell me why I should change my mind. I've made up my decision.

So what if you had two surgeries that went badly? I get that you're scared—really, I do—but using that as an excuse here doesn't really hold up, because at the end of the day, that's just your own personal projection speaking.

Donna Taylor68 said:My bad. Wasn't trying to act all high and mighty here. I just looked at this thread and saw a massive pile of haters attacking anyone talking about kids or parenting—honestly, some of those posts sounded like they were written by toddlers—so I figured I’d offer a different perspective to keep things civil.
At the end of the day, for some people, staying childless is actually the better move. Not because of them, but for the sake of the kids.

Later. 👋I stopped caring about these forum fights a long time ago.

Honestly, my favorite kind of people are those who genuinely believe everyone is just one conversation away from changing their mind about having kids. It’s such a fascinatingly optimistic outlook! Take her, for example—she wasn't even considering motherhood at all, but then along comes Don Juan with his sudden burst of enlightenment, and suddenly everything changes. Isn't it funny how that works?🤦She finally made up her mind to have a baby, and now suddenly she feels the need to broadcast that decision to the entire world? It’s like she expects everyone to fall in line with her choice, or else we’re all just "child haters" or some other ridiculous label. Honestly, how can you even respond to that kind of logic? It's just exhausting, isn't it?🙄...
And then they throw in that subtle little jab, acting like they aren't being superior by tacking on that malicious smiley face at the end. You know what I mean? It’s such a classic move... you can almost see exactly what they're thinking, can't you?
👋👋👋

Honestly, when it comes to those people who constantly nag you about whether you’re going to get married or have kids, my advice is simple: just cut them out. Why even give them the headspace? If they can't respect the life choices you've made, they don't deserve a seat at your table. It really isn't worth the stress, is it? Seriously, why bother getting worked up over people who clearly don't value your autonomy? Just remove that negativity from your life and move on.

I'm over 30 and, honestly, nobody has ever once asked me when I’m getting married or having kids. If anything, it feels like people are way too preoccupied with their own messes to bother worrying about my life...

Eric Newman4 said:I'm over 30 and, honestly, nobody has ever once asked me when I’m getting married or having kids. If anything, it feels like people are way too preoccupied with their own messes to bother worrying about my life...

If you're a man, that's why it isn't weird.😁 You can still have kids well into your fifties if you want to.
From what I've noticed, those questions are almost always aimed at women.

Honestly, the way you guys are attacking this young woman is embarrassing. She explained her situation perfectly. She was with this guy for years, and during that time, they explored their dreams and desires together, only to realize those specific things might not hold the same appeal 30 or 40 years down the line. It’s the same for you—whether it's grabbing a beer after work, staying up all night, or just hanging out with your pets, those things won't stay exciting forever. You’ll find new interests. If someone's new interest happens to be having a child, that isn't strange at all for someone who has already lived through their younger years. Your defensiveness over someone simply pointing out that people evolve is ridiculous. It reminds me of those intense music debates: "I listen to heavy metal, and heaven forbid some hipster suggests I might want to listen to jazz in ten years!" No one is forcing a child on anyone; they are just saying that as humans, we change. That shift might lead to wanting kids, or it might not.

Alexander Adams94 said:Honestly, the way you guys are attacking this young woman is embarrassing. She explained her situation perfectly. She was with this guy for years, and during that time, they explored their dreams and desires together, only to realize those specific things might not hold the same appeal 30 or 40 years down the line. It’s the same for you—whether it's grabbing a beer after work, staying up all night, or just hanging out with your pets, those things won't stay exciting forever. You’ll find new interests. If someone's new interest happens to be having a child, that isn't strange at all for someone who has already lived through their younger years. Your defensiveness over someone simply pointing out that people evolve is ridiculous. It reminds me of those intense music debates: "I listen to heavy metal, and heaven forbid some hipster suggests I might want to listen to jazz in ten years!" No one is forcing a child on anyone; they are just saying that as humans, we change. That shift might lead to wanting kids, or it might not.

Exactly! Because, as they say, "change is the only constant."
Whether someone's life eventually includes raising kids, adopting a bunch of cats, or just spending their days gardening in the backyard... well, that's just how the cookie crumbles.😉