School closures/delays?

Personally, I don't care who handles what when it comes to raising their own kids, provided there’s no neglect or abuse involved.
But
That doesn't mean we can't share our thoughts on those "let them just play a little longer" excuses. If you ask me, keeping my daughter in preschool for an extra year would have actually done her more harm than good. During her last year there, she was constantly bored; she had already gone through the pre-K curriculum twice, and honestly, she was breezing through it—it was just too easy for her. What would she really gain from staying another year? Just frustration and discontent. It could even mess with her self-esteem because all her friends had moved on, leaving her feeling like she wasn't "ready," which is a heavy realization for a six-year-old to make. On the flip side, looking at her now at the end of second grade, she’s so happy, proud, and independent. Whether it's walking home by herself or managing her own phone, all that "burden" of growing up and taking on responsibilities has actually been a huge boost for her confidence.

Maybe it’s worth considering the downsides of keeping a child in daycare or preschool for an extra year when they clearly don't need it. Especially considering how many parents in our group might end up with children who are two years apart—and we all know how massive the gap in intellectual and emotional development is at that age.

And just thinking back to my own school days—I don't know about everyone else, but I started first grade at six years and four months old, and I found it pretty dull. There was zero challenge, especially in that first year, because I felt like I already knew everything they were teaching us. I can't help but wonder how much worse it would have been if I had waited an entire year to start... it probably would have been a nightmare.

🤦
Maybe try reading the post again? Honestly, everyone is so rushed to jump in with their opinions that nobody actually takes a second to process the facts.

Look, no parent makes these kinds of calls in a vacuum. You don't just decide on your own; you rely on professional guidance and ultimately follow the recommendation of a board or a committee.

And why on earth do you think a child being unable to recount their own experience isn't a valid reason? Of course it is. That’s never going to be the sole issue, but it’s part of the bigger picture.
Finally, why do you care so much if your kids are already grown and ready for the world? Do we really need to push our unprepared kids into things just so yours can look more "ready" by comparison???

Every parent does what they believe is best for their offspring. It’s not "overprotectiveness"—it’s listening to a child's readiness and working alongside professionals who actually have the degrees and the experience to back up their advice.

Like I said before, I’m lucky enough to have a little genius at home who started school at five, so forgive me if I sound like I know what I'm talking about when I say that age can be perfect.

Tyler Ruiz502 said:Why all the lectures and the judgmental looks just because someone asked for a delay? It’s clearly more convenient for them that way—just a way to spin things. Honestly, what’s the big deal? Is your kid somehow being deprived because of this?

If it were up to me, I’d love it if we weren't forced into these rigid schedules—if we could just take an extra year of vacation whenever it actually suits us... In that scenario, my kid would have been looked after at daycare for one more summer, just a little extra buffer. And they might have gained a year of "independence" by stepping away from the constant grind...
There’s nothing to lose here; you can only gain.
I mean, why should my personal reasons bother anyone? Seriously.

It's because if a boy starts first grade at 6.5 while a girl starts at 7.5, she's going to be older than him.
And she might be taller too.
She might be smarter.
And probably more independent and mature.

Of course, it isn't strictly about birthdays or numbers, but adults tend to obsess over dates and statistics.

No one just decides to skip a grade or delay enrollment on a whim; you need official confirmation that the child isn't ready. Usually, that involves passing through a school pediatrician, a school counselor, or a preschool specialist—and sometimes even other medical institutions where the child has been receiving diagnostics or ongoing treatment.

I honestly doubt this is just parents acting on whims or wanting an extra year of carefree playtime in preschool.

When a professional suggests a child might not be ready for school yet, and that child happens to be right on the age cutoff, a parent might weigh those factors alongside things like a longer summer vacation, easier childcare, or smoother travel schedules. To me, I don't see anything wrong with that.
Even if it goes the other way—where the specialists don't find any reason to delay—a parent who feels strongly about it can always seek a third opinion. That doesn't guarantee a delay if there truly isn't a valid reason, though.

I'm not saying every expert is perfect—I know testing can sometimes be superficial or even biased—but looking at the overall number of delays, it seems to me that most of them are actually quite rare. And the vast majority of these delays make total sense.

At the same time, there are still many kids who *should* have had their enrollment delayed but didn't. Those are the kids I worry about... It’s hard for me to watch a parent refuse to accept that their child needs more time, only realizing it halfway through the school year when it's already far too late.
(Especially when they use excuses like "everyone else in the group is going, so they should too," or "they need to toughen up," or "we all started early 30 years ago, so why change now?" To me, that sounds like following outdated trends, and I'm generally against following trends just for the sake of it.)

Brian Jones8 said:🤦
Maybe try reading the post again? Honestly, everyone is so rushed to jump in with their opinions that nobody actually takes a second to process the facts.

Look, no parent makes these kinds of calls in a vacuum. You don't just decide on your own; you rely on professional guidance and ultimately follow the recommendation of a board or a committee.

And why on earth do you think a child being unable to recount their own experience isn't a valid reason? Of course it is. That’s never going to be the sole issue, but it’s part of the bigger picture.
Finally, why do you care so much if your kids are already grown and ready for the world? Do we really need to push our unprepared kids into things just so yours can look more "ready" by comparison???

Every parent does what they believe is best for their offspring. It’s not "overprotectiveness"—it’s listening to a child's readiness and working alongside professionals who actually have the degrees and the experience to back up their advice.

Like I said before, I’m lucky enough to have a little genius at home who started school at five, so forgive me if I sound like I know what I'm talking about when I say that age can be perfect.

Like I said, I'm not concerned with how others handle their business. And truthfully, I don't know you, and I don't know your child, so I have absolutely no clue what the best path is for your specific situation. That's exactly why I tried to stay general and avoid judging individual cases, aside from that one father I brought up in my last post. I'm genuinely confused as to why you felt like I was taking a shot at you personally.☕

Susan James said:It's because if a boy starts first grade at 6.5 while a girl starts at 7.5, she's going to be older than him.
And she might be taller too.
She might be smarter.
And probably more independent and mature.

Of course, it isn't strictly about birthdays or numbers, but adults tend to obsess over dates and statistics.

No one just decides to skip a grade or delay enrollment on a whim; you need official confirmation that the child isn't ready. Usually, that involves passing through a school pediatrician, a school counselor, or a preschool specialist—and sometimes even other medical institutions where the child has been receiving diagnostics or ongoing treatment.

I honestly doubt this is just parents acting on whims or wanting an extra year of carefree playtime in preschool.

When a professional suggests a child might not be ready for school yet, and that child happens to be right on the age cutoff, a parent might weigh those factors alongside things like a longer summer vacation, easier childcare, or smoother travel schedules. To me, I don't see anything wrong with that.
Even if it goes the other way—where the specialists don't find any reason to delay—a parent who feels strongly about it can always seek a third opinion. That doesn't guarantee a delay if there truly isn't a valid reason, though.

I'm not saying every expert is perfect—I know testing can sometimes be superficial or even biased—but looking at the overall number of delays, it seems to me that most of them are actually quite rare. And the vast majority of these delays make total sense.

At the same time, there are still many kids who *should* have had their enrollment delayed but didn't. Those are the kids I worry about... It’s hard for me to watch a parent refuse to accept that their child needs more time, only realizing it halfway through the school year when it's already far too late.
(Especially when they use excuses like "everyone else in the group is going, so they should too," or "they need to toughen up," or "we all started early 30 years ago, so why change now?" To me, that sounds like following outdated trends, and I'm generally against following trends just for the sake of it.)

I wish things worked exactly the way you described, but my impression remains different. I realize the final call rests with the experts, but in various parts of our system, boundaries seem to shift under parental pressure. I suspect this situation isn't an exception to that rule.

Pushing a child into school against a professional assessment is just the flip side of the same coin.

I believe most parents are acting with the best intentions. Unfortunately, good intentions don't always lead to the best path.

I’ve just realized that I actually have no idea what we're even talking about here 🤦—the whole topic of delaying school starts. I was under the impression we were discussing cases where the kids aren't legally required to be enrolled yet, so parents can basically pick and choose which year works best for them.

Now, if we’re talking about postponing things when a child is already legally mandated to be in school... hmmm... well, honestly, that’s not my circus and not my monkeys. 😁

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Look, northerncobra27, I’ve just got one question for you: do you actually know what the legal requirements are if you want to delay a kid starting school for another year of preschool?

The whole "letting them play for one more year" thing is really only an option for parents whose kids aren't legally required to enroll yet—like if they were born in, say, April. In that case, you can send them to school or keep them home, and it's totally up to you.
But let’s be clear: this isn't something a dad just decides on a whim!

I don't think April 6th is the issue here. The real problem is March 29th. Like I already pointed out, how does a kid born on March 29th this year end up in the exact same school grade as a kid born on March 29th last year?

Brian Jones8 said:Look, northerncobra27, I’ve just got one question for you: do you actually know what the legal requirements are if you want to delay a kid starting school for another year of preschool?

The whole "letting them play for one more year" thing is really only an option for parents whose kids aren't legally required to enroll yet—like if they were born in, say, April. In that case, you can send them to school or keep them home, and it's totally up to you.
But let’s be clear: this isn't something a dad just decides on a whim!

It’s quite a mountain of steps, really; you’re looking at a full medical evaluation through the school district, sitting down for consultations with the school's specialist team—psychologists, speech therapists, all that—and then eventually dealing with all the paperwork at some local municipal or county office, I suppose?

In this case, saying "let them play for another year" is something only a parent can decide if their child isn't technically required to start kindergarten yet—like if they were born around April 6th, for instance—so they have the choice to enroll them early or just hold off.
it can't just be the dad making the call on his own!

You make a good point there; I went back to check the thread, and it wasn't actually the father who wrote that, it was the mother after all😁. She mentioned the child's own readiness as one of those two main deciding factors 👏 that tipped the scales for them.

If a kid was born on April 6th, they aren't legally required to be in school yet, though if I understood your date correctly, you might actually be able to request an early enrollment instead.

nimblelynx7 said:I don't think April 6th is the issue here. The real problem is March 29th. Like I already pointed out, how does a kid born on March 29th this year end up in the exact same school grade as a kid born on March 29th last year?

It essentially boils down to one parent asking for a delay while the other is pushing for an early enrollment😁.

Just keeping an eye on this thread... though I’ve already made my stance pretty clear. This trend of delaying things isn't great—it carries a whole chain of consequences that others have already pointed out, so I won't bore you by repeating them. Sure, some people have legitimate reasons, while others... well, maybe not. And honestly, telling me how to handle my own kid isn't much of an argument—by that logic, even public schooling would be pointless, since we could all just decide what's best for our children ourselves. As for the idea that delays aren't just about parents, but rather about who can influence the school district officials... don't make me laugh. I know at least five people who openly admitted to "smoothing over" a delay that had absolutely no basis in reality. Apparently, getting a delay approved from those "experts" isn't nearly as difficult as they claim.

It makes sense on one hand, but then again, the law states that kids who turn six by April 1st are the ones enrolling in school.

So, if someone was born on March 29th, they end up in the same class as a kid born on March 29th of the following year, just because the district drew an arbitrary line at April 1st. It defies all logic.

Now you’ve gone and forced me to dig into my own history. I was born in July '85 and started school that September in 1992—meaning I was seven years and two months old.
My wife was born in May '87 and started school in September '94. Coincidentally, she was seven years and four months old.

If we had both been even slightly less lucky—if we’d been born just a few months earlier—we would have been forced to start at six, pushing our entire education back a full year. In cases like this, the age gap between classmates can swing anywhere from six months to a whole year.

So how do you even draw the line?

I started kindergarten back in '82—was six years and three months old at the time. I wasn't even the youngest; there were two other girls even smaller than me... though, truth be told, there was one girl who was over a year older than I was. It didn't exactly make a difference in how well I did in school.

James Alvarez2 said:So how do you even draw the line?

Like I already stated, 1.4 is way too high. It needs to be 1.2.

So how would you actually close that gap? 🤷

James Alvarez2 said:So how do you even draw the line?

I was thinking about what that other user mentioned regarding the Netherlands.
The idea is to have a gradual transition.
A user from New Zealand actually mentioned that over there, they often hold birthday celebrations right in the middle of the school year.
It seems like a pretty common practice in quite a few countries.

What we have here feels a bit messy.
In my experience, most kids pick things up naturally through play, so they show up to kindergarten ready to go regardless of their birth date—it really just depends on how much they’ve been playing.
Personally, I don't think kids need to be forced to learn reading and writing before they start school, but I also see how much easier it is for the kids who already know how to do it. On the flip side, some kids who have been read to since they were babies pick it up so naturally they basically teach themselves.
Kids born between late autumn and early summer fall into this real gray area, and it all comes down to individual assessment, which can be hit or miss.
It really depends on whether they went to preschool at all (and if they only did those part-time prep classes during their final year), what kind of program they attended, and what they would gain by spending one more year in a high-quality preschool setting.
As long as they get that extra year to just be kids—to play without stress, to have books read to them, and to learn at their own pace—I wouldn't worry too much. It’s funny; while kids born after April 1st get a "pass" where they don't have to deal with the headache of registering for city testing, those born on March 29th get the exact same luxury of delaying that whole process. It's the same situation as the kids born in late December. ☕

I think I read somewhere—maybe on a thread about New Zealand?—that kids there start school once they hit five. It’s more of a gradual "trickle" into the classroom based on when they turn five. They essentially solved the problem of everyone starting at the exact same age by making sure they end up in classes with peers of a similar age (give or take a few months) rather than everyone being born on the same day 😂. I'm assuming this means there isn't really a delay involved 😁
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Quincy and Robert Rodriguez9 mentioned New Zealand earlier, so we're probably thinking of the exact same thing.

But honestly, if a 6 to 12-month gap is considered a "gray area," then enrolling a child early shouldn't be such a huge deal. It seems like one of those things where parents face judgment or side-eye from people around them (for instance, my daughter was born on April 1st, so even though she's two months later, I would have still enrolled her)

In the US, you enroll a kid between their 5th and 6th birthdays during any semester—I think there are 🤔 of them. It really just depends on when their birthday falls or whatever works best for the parents. By age 6, they have to be enrolled. If you sign them up during one of the last two semesters, it doesn't count as its own year; it just rolls into the next one, so the whole thing is treated as 1st grade. Their school year kicks off in January.

Great, so we're back to talking about the drip again.
Some people are already ahead of the curve while others are just sitting there... if some folks already know their stuff, what exactly are the rest of you even doing while everyone else is learning? 🤷